Larkrigg Fell

by Freda Lightfoot

  ‘You mean we don’t.’

  ‘Not for me to say.’

  ‘Farmers have only themselves to blame for the tourists,’ Pietro put in. ‘They do the bed and breakfast, have the caravans on their farms. They are as greedy as everyone else, I think.’

  Andrew appeared enraged by this attack. ‘We have to do summat to add to our income. There’s a limit to the improvements you can make on a hill farm. Geography, climate, the land itself puts limits on you. There are more choices, happen, in arable farming. Here, there’s only so much you can get out of a Swaledale ewe. Bad weather at the wrong time and your lambing season is ruined and so is your income for the year. Farmers have their livings to make, same as everyone else.’

  Jonty gave an exaggerated yawn. ‘We seem to be managing very well without,’ and all three of them collapsed into gales of laughter while Andrew’s face suffused in red from his neck to the roots of his hair.

  Beth put up a hand. She’d been quite impressed by the strength of Andrew’s argument and his ability to put it so effectively. She’d learned a good deal about him today, most of it surprisingly likeable, and felt again the shame of her friends’ treatment of him. ‘No more arguments. Not tonight. Let’s just have fun, shall we?’

  Gradually the giggles subsided, more beer was opened, wine glasses were refilled and a silence sank upon them all. After a moment, Sarah said, ‘So what do we do then? We can’t talk about music or films as Andrew knows nothing about either, nor dare we discuss the apparently controversial subject of the countryside or tourists as he gets upset, so what do we do?’

  ‘Play monopoly?’ Tessa suggested with a grin.

  It was then that Jonty made his most outrageous suggestion yet. Perhaps it was the excessive amount of wine they’d drunk which accounted for it but he suddenly got up and came over to sit by Beth on the small sofa. ‘I enjoy games and you said we should have fun, so why not a game of the more adult variety? Why don’t we do a bit of partner swopping? That’d be good for a giggle, eh?’

  ‘What?’ Sarah sat up straight in her seat, all amused calm gone, bristling defensively. ‘What are you talking about?’

  His arm had somehow crept around Beth’s waist and he was pulling her against him. ‘You are so beautiful,’ he said in mock dramatic tones. ‘How about it?’

  He winked outrageously at her, making her giggle though half aware of a frozen expression on Pietro’s face. ‘Don’t be silly. We don’t even have partners.’ She realised at once what a dangerous defence that was.

  ‘We can soon solve that,’ he said, nuzzling into her warm throat. ‘Fight a duel or something.’

  Beth couldn’t help but laugh more than ever. ‘We could draw lots,’ she suggested, playing along with his wicked teasing as she revelled in the burning jealousy in Pietro’s eyes.

  Jonty wagged a wobbly forger. ‘Tessa can have Pietro. See how she gets on with him and Sarah can have Andrew. That should liven the peasant farmer up a bit.’

  Andrew got to his feet, ears pink and almost seeming to stand out from the side of his head, hands clenching and unclenching by his side as he struggled to contain himself. ‘I’ve told you before, I’m no peasant farmer, and you shouldn’t talk about women in that cheap way.’

  ‘It’s a joke,’ Jonty said, airily waving a hand. ‘Calm down, Sir Galahad.’

  Andrew drew in a deep breath. ‘Happen Tessa would rather have Pietro. Beth can come with me. I’ll see she’s kept safe if you lot want to play that sort of daft lark.’

  ‘Heavens, Beth, you’ve found a protector.’ Sarah chortled with glee and fell back into the arm chair, legs waving in an apoplexy of delight while Beth simply stared at Andrew, astonished.

  Jonty took this momentary lack of attention on her part to nestle Beth closer. ‘She doesn’t need nurse-maiding, do you love? I’ll take good care of you. And Sarah can give you just the education you need, farmer boy.’

  Pietro was glowering furiously, and something inside of Beth sang with joy to see it. Could he fancy her after all? Tension crackled in the room, the joke threatening to turn ugly. But trouble was the last thing she wanted.

  ‘Don’t I get a say?’ Tessa quietly protested. ‘I’m not against a bit of fun but I’ll make my own choices, thanks very much, if a choice there is to be.’ She cast Andrew such a fierce warning glance that Beth thought he should rightly have been burned to a crisp. Poor Tessa. How dreadful to feel so neglected and jealous.

  ‘Let’s stop this now,’ she said, managing at last to prise herself free of Jonty’s several hands and sit on the arm of the sofa. ‘Andrew’s right, this joke has gone far enough.’

  Suddenly Sarah went over and plonked herself on Pietro’s knee. ‘Personally, I’m all for it. Why not? I’ll have Pietro.’

  Eyes glittering with anger, furious that Jonty should embarrass and betray her in this way, Sarah meant to show him that she too could play games. Scarlet lips curved into a sensual smile as she stroked his smooth cheek with a lingering fingertip, then lowering her mouth she kissed him, with a smooth sensuality that held everyone in thrall.

  Beth saw him jerk, startled but jubilant no doubt, and her heart sank with misery. So now he had Sarah, as he’d no doubt wanted all along.

  The kiss seemed to go on for ever and Beth could do nothing but watch helplessly. Swamped by hot humiliation, she wanted, in that moment, to curl up and die. How could Sarah do this to her? How dare she? Was she entirely blind? Hadn’t she even noticed how she felt about Pietro? Then she heard Jonty’s soft voice in her ear. ‘Take no notice.’ Then out loud, ‘We could toss a coin,’ as if it were all of no consequence. ‘How about that?’

  ‘No thanks,’ Sarah said. ‘Pietro?’

  It was Andrew who settled the matter. ‘Let Beth decide.’

  Jonty grinned. ‘OK, why not? Go on, Beth, you choose. Who do you fancy? The clod-hopping country yokel, beautiful but fickle Pietro, or myself, all male and satisfaction guaranteed.’

  Beth felt started to giggle, unable to help herself for Jonty could really be very funny. Then catching sight of Andrew’s stricken face was instantly ashamed. She’d really rather liked him on first acquaintance at the wrestling. But that was before she’d met Pietro. ‘I think I’d need notice of that question,’ she said, cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

  ‘Pity.’ Dark eyes teased. ‘I can’t persuade you to choose me then?’ She shook her head and Jonty put one hand to his heart in exaggerated self-pity. ‘I’ve been spurned. How will I survive?’

  A spurt of laughter bubbled up in her throat. ‘Stop it, Jonty. You’re incorrigible.’

  ‘Incorrigible?’ he shouted. ‘What a wonderful word. What does it mean? Does it mean this?’ Then before Beth had time to anticipate his next move, he snatched her from the arm of the sofa and pulled her into his lap, kissing her long and hard. It was some moments before she managed to extricate herself, all rumpled and flustered, while Jonty teasingly begged for more. But no one else seemed in the least amused. The atmosphere had changed instantly.

  ‘Leave Beth alone.’ Andrew burst out, even as Pietro moved first. With Sarah still in his arms the Italian strode over to the sofa and dropped her unceremoniously upon Jonty’s lap. ‘You stick with this one, OK? You want her, you got her. I will make my own choices from now on.’

  The two men glared at each other with such open antagonism the very air became suddenly charged with a dangerous undercurrent, while Sarah slid to the floor in an undignified heap of squealing fury.

  Pietro was the one to break the challenging stance to turn away and put his arm protectively about Beth. Leaving Sarah to her own devices, she willingly leaned into his shoulder. Enchanted that he should prove so caring, her eyes shone with gratitude, failing to notice the flicker of pain that passed across Andrew’s face.

  ‘Come on,’ Tessa said, tugging at Andrew’s arm. ‘Let’s disappear. We’re not wanted here. Let them sort it out between them.’

  Beth didn’t even see them go.

/>   Jonty and Sarah likewise drifted away while Beth lay content in the warm circle of Pietro’s arms. She could feel the steady beat of his heart and in that moment, she felt filled with happiness.

  Chapter Ten

  Beth sat on the edge of the sofa, her hands clasped in her lap and gazed at him. He was so beautiful. She longed for him to love her and could hardly take in what was happening. Was he disappointed that he hadn’t got Sarah? Did he really like her? Did he want to talk or have sex? Would he mind that she had no experience and was still a virgin, that she was unused to the kind of grown-up games Sarah took for granted? And how did she feel about that? How should she handle it?

  ‘More wine, or a beer?’ he asked, holding up her glass, and she shook her head.

  Beth dropped her gaze, not watching as he went to refill his own, feeling suddenly very shy and awkward, and oddly reluctant to take this any further. Where were Tessa and Andrew? Were they in another room? Were they making love? The thought somehow made her feel oddly uncomfortable but then they were meant for each other, weren’t they? And Tess had been married before, had the kind of attitude to life which Beth could only envy.

  In her mind she saw herself lounging back enticingly upon the sofa cushions, beckoning the beautiful Pietro to come to her. He would tremble as he took her in his arms and place his soft lips to hers. He would breathe words of love in her ear and she would cradle him against her breast. Then he would gently peel away each layer of her clothing, kissing every part of her and she would give herself to him with joy while he told her she was the only woman he had ever loved, ever could love.

  In reality she sat with her knees jammed together and felt more tongue-tied and awkward than ever in her life before. And very slightly afraid. How very shaming and degrading this all was. Not in the least bit romantic. What was she doing wrong?

  Should she tell him right away that she wasn’t on the pill, she worried? Or would that make him laugh, and think her even more stupid and naïve?

  ‘You look most uncomfortable sitting there,’ he said. ‘Why don’t you have another drink?’

  ‘No thanks, my head is spinning already. I think I’ve had enough.’

  ‘Never enough.’

  ‘You’ll have to tell me what you want me to do.’

  ‘Don’t you know?’

  She shook her head, smitten into silence by her longing for him.

  ‘What makes you think I do?’

  She smiled at that. ‘You’re a man.’

  ‘Yes,’ he said thoughtfully, his heavenly blue eyes on hers. ‘I am, aren’t I? And you do not quite know why you are here, playing this stupid game?’

  ‘Oh, I really don’t mind.’ She could have kicked herself. How juvenile that sounded, as if she were a schoolgirl who’d been told to report for some special duty. She couldn’t help but smile. ‘I’m sorry. I’m not very experienced at this sort of thing.’

  He came and sat beside her on the sofa, pulling her towards him. There was an awkward moment as somehow her nose bumped against his and she gave a nervous giggle. ‘Why don’t you leave it to me?’ he said. ‘We give it a go, sì?’

  ‘Yes, of course.’ It wasn’t the most romantic choice of words, but wasn’t this what she had longed for?

  He pushed her back against the sofa cushions and putting his mouth to hers, started to kiss her. His lips were not soft as she had imagined but hard and rather moist and surprisingly cool. She’d been kissed before, by young men at the school dances, and by Jeremy of course, quite a lot. But this seemed different somehow, as if it were merely a ritual, a prelude for what followed after. His tongue had invaded her mouth and she wondered what she ought to do with her own which seemed dreadfully in the way. She could taste the red wine he’d drunk which wasn’t unpleasant, because in a way it made her feel drunk too.

  Then his fingers began to methodically unbutton her shirt and her heart gave a little flip of alarm. So soon? He slipped one hand inside and as he grasped her warm breast Beth gave a tiny squeal. She hadn’t at all been prepared for the pain of it as his hand massaged the soft flesh. He smelled of garlic and seemed to be breathing very hard but she really didn’t mind, she wanted only to do everything right and not to put him off. She risked putting one hand to the nape of his neck and began to caress his hair.

  ‘Don’t,’ he murmured, as if irritated, and she stopped, at a loss to know how to please him. Then he began to nuzzle below her earlobe but somehow missed and kissed her shoulder instead. ‘Drat, too much wine. Sorry.’

  Then his mouth closed over hers again and she forgot everything but the dark need growing in the pit of her stomach. His hands were at her waist, pulling her beneath him. What would happen next? Would he manage to take off all her clothes, drunk as he was, or should she do it for him? And when would he ask her about precautions? Jeremy had been the perfect gentleman by comparison with this, willing to wait for the wedding that in fact had never taken place. Should she ask if he’d brought something or would that sound too much like an invitation? Oh, dear lord, why hadn’t she listened more carefully when Sarah had talked about her encounters?

  ‘Pietro?’

  He didn’t answer, seeming to be concentrating hard on her bra strap.

  ‘I’ll do it,’ she said helpfully and yanking at the hook and eye, slid out of it. Her breasts felt suddenly wonderfully free, exciting her as they seemed to fall into his hands. But ignoring their ripe plumpness he reached instead for the hem of her skirt and slid his palms along the length of her thigh.

  His breathing was a rasping sound in her ear, his hand now fumbling with her panties.

  Goodness, was she expected to take those off herself too? And what if she did? His fingers made the issue irrelevant and she gasped, startled by the sensations he was creating in her even as she blushed at her own daring. Now his mouth was at her breast, swearing softly as he sought the nipple. He was pushing his body on top of hers and something pulsated against her thigh.

  And in all this fumbling he had not spoken one word to her.

  Oh, dear God, she must say something, this couldn’t go on. Yet all she longed to do was to close her eyes and not think at all, only experience the strength of his love. Beth was quite certain that Sarah would never have found herself in such a predicament. How stupid to want to be as reckless and sexy as her sister without using the same common sense beforehand.

  He wasn’t even kissing her now, hardly seemed aware of her at all as he struggled with the zip on his jeans. She could scarcely focus on anything but these new, intoxicating sensations that robbed her of will, and the growing needs of her own body like a raging thirst within. She should tell him soon. Now!

  ‘Pietro…’ He’d flung himself off her and Beth felt the cold draught of rejection once again. ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’

  ‘I think I drink too much.’

  To her utter humiliation Beth realised he was not aroused, not in the slightest. He’d tried hard but got nowhere. But was that because of the drink, she agonised, or an excuse when really he didn’t fancy her at all. He looked so embarrassed, so ashamed, her heart went out to him. ‘It really doesn’t matter. Just as well actually. I’m not even on the pill.’

  ‘What?’ He jerked, his knee knocking against her shin, bringing a sting of tears to her eyes. ‘What did you say?’

  ‘It doesn’t matter. I - I shouldn’t have said anything, only...’

  His whole body seemed to freeze. ‘You are the virgin?’

  She almost giggled then, but it was no more than hysteria. ‘Yes, I am still the virgin.’

  Beth didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, or wish herself quietly to die of shame there and then. He hadn’t wanted her anyway, was no doubt only going through the motions, and yet had failed to summon up the necessary enthusiasm. He banged out of the room and she lay as if turned to stone while hot tears spurted from the corner of each eye and ran down her cheeks into the ear he hadn’t quite kissed.

  Sarah lay in bed, showing n
o inclination to rise, for all it was past eleven o’clock in the morning. Beth shook her awake and told her there were things to be done.

  She sat up, hair a tangle about her head, eyes blinking in the bright sunshine as Beth flung back the curtains. ‘Where’s Jonty?’

  ‘Probably up long since.’

  A suspicious glint came into her eyes. ‘He never gets up early. Where’s Tessa? Have you seen her this morning?’ Before Beth could reply, Sarah was out of bed and storming across the room clad only in her sleeping shirt. She ran out on to the landing and flung open the next bedroom door. A surprised figure sat up in bed.

  ‘Has Jonty been here?’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Don’t play the innocent with me. He has, hasn’t he?’ Sarah glared ferociously as Tessa smilingly picked up the grizzling infant from his crib to hug him close. ‘Come on cherub, let’s find breakfast, shall we? Go and get dressed, Sarah. You look as if you’ve had a hard night.’

  What a tangle of emotions, Beth thought, as they bounced along in Meg’s old van. They were doing some essential errands for their grandmother in Kendal, buying sheep nuts, cattle feed, chicken wire and such-like delights. They drove down a long lane that wound through the dale, passing lime-washed farmhouses with squat chimneys, drystone walls padded with moss and verges thick with cow parsley, spleenwort, and the mountain fern that grew so vigorously in this damp region.

  It would be funny, Beth decided, were it not so very serious. Sarah jealous because she imagined Tessa fancied Jonty, when really she was pining for Andrew. And apart from a burst of unexpected protectiveness over herself of all people, Andrew hadn’t seemed interested in anyone, apparently going home early. But then he did have to get up at five for milking.

  Then there was Jonty making a play for her which had made Sarah resentful and sulking. And having rowed bitterly with Pietro last night, this morning the pair had gone off happily together somewhere, blithely unconcerned, completely uncaring that the ‘game’ seemed to have caused so much upset.