In Love and War

by Natalie Brock

But wait. Cathy suddenly remembered what David said. He said that he would write up a medical discharge order so she could be sent home. But she had no home. She had nothing to go home to. Here, she had a life. In the states, she had nothing. She couldn’t get discharged, not now. Not when Michael sacrificed so much just so she could stay. His sacrifice would be for nothing if she were to go home.

  No, she decided, she needed to stay here and wait for his return. He said he wanted to marry her, and that’s what she wanted too. Then they could return to the states as a respectable family, instead of her going back to St. Louis alone and in disgrace as an unwed mother.

  Cathy talked to the tree, imagining it was Michael. “I know what I have to do now, Michael. I’m not going to tell anyone about this baby until I can tell you about it first. I can’t wait to see your face when I tell you. I know you’ll be so happy about it, and then everything will be okay, like you promised.” She looked upward at the sky. “Please God, let everything be okay.”

  Chapter 77

  Cathy returned to the Commissary with a newfound confidence. She knew exactly what she was going to do, and she was pleased with her decisions. First of all, she was going to keep the news of her pregnancy a secret until she could share it with Michael. Second, now that she received Michael’s “message,” she was filled with renewed hope and she looked forward to a happy future with Michael. There was no way she was going back to St. Louis alone now.

  When she walked through the doors of what she expected to be an empty mess hall, she was surprised to see Suze in a shouting match with Mary while Ned tried to referee.

  “Leave me alone. I just came in here to get a cup of coffee for Dr. Mason,” Mary said.

  “I won’t leave you alone. Not until you stop going after every guy I’m interested in,” Suze said. “First Michael, now Ned!”

  That got Cathy’s attention. What the heck was going on here, she wondered.

  “You can have Ned if you want him,” Mary shot back. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

  “And neither was Michael,” Suze shouted. Suze saw Cathy out of the corner of her eye and took the opportunity to draw her arch nemesis into the fray. “Ask her,” Suze said, pointing at Cathy. “She’ll tell you. She thought Michael was her boyfriend too, but he’s just a playboy. Michael Zacharius doesn’t care about anyone but himself.”

  Without thinking, Cathy walked up to Suze and got into her space. “What are you talking about? Why are you tearing Michael down like this when he’s not even here to defend himself?”

  “Because I’m sick and tired of other girls acting like they have a claim on him,” Suze spat. “I saw him first.”

  Mary snapped her fingers in Suze’s face. “That just proves how little you meant to him. If he cared about you even a little bit, he wouldn’t have moved on with me.”

  Ned moved closer to the action. “Girls, girls, girls, why are you even talking about someone who’s not here?” He laughed, trying to break the tension. “I’m here. And there’s plenty of me to go around.”

  Suze ignored Ned and took a step closer to Mary. “With that kind of logic, you just proved that you couldn’t satisfy Michael either because he dropped you like a hot potato.”

  Mary squinted at Suze in an effort to appear menacing. “Shut up Suze.”

  “Face it, Mary,” Suze said without missing a beat, “he couldn’t care less about you. He’s aloof and selfish and he never thinks about anyone but himself.”

  “That’s a lie!” Cathy reacted automatically. How could anyone say Michael was selfish when he left home and enlisted in the Army so his family would have more food on the table. And he left base to save her from being fired. “Anyone who thinks Michael is selfish doesn’t know him. He enlisted in the Army to help keep his family from struggling. And he volunteered to be deployed early because....” Cathy’s words trailed off as she realized she said too much.

  “Wow, you’ve got it bad for him, don’t you?” Suze was scoffing more than being sympathetic. “Go on, fool yourself if you want, but I know Michael, and Michael doesn’t care about anyone,” she said, “including you, Granny. Look around,” she said, indicating herself and Mary. “You weren’t even Michael’s first choice.”

  Suze’s words were painful to hear and Cathy felt her anger rising. Cathy knew in her heart of hearts that Suze was wrong, but the words still hurt. Cathy even had proof that Michael loved her. She put her hand on her belly and realized that she has something these other girls would never have -- a living breathing part of Michael Zacharius.

  “What’s the matter, Granny,” Suze chided. “Cat got your tongue? Or do you know I’m right?”

  “I know for a fact you’re wrong! And by the way, Miss know-it-all, it’s not the first choice that counts. It’s the last.” Cathy turned her back on Suze. She had enough of Suze’s gossipy schoolgirl behavior.

  Suze caught Cathy’s arm. “Don’t turn your back on me, Granny. I’m not finished.”

  Ned and Mary shot each other a look from the sidelines as they watched Suze provoke Cathy. It was in that moment that Mary realized that Cathy was the “C” from the tree, and it was her initial that Michael carved next to his own.

  “How do you know for a fact I’m wrong?”

  Cathy pulled her arm away from Suze. “Go to hell, Suze.”

  Suze smacked Cathy’s face and her eyeglasses fell to the floor. Cathy grabbed a fistful of Suze’s hair and yanked it. Suze pushed Cathy to get her to let go of her hair and Cathy fell to the ground. Cathy’s eyes grew wide as she feared for her baby. Suze lunged at Cathy on the floor and Cathy tried to push her off. She didn’t want to fight anymore.

  Out of nowhere, a pair of hands grabbed Suze from behind and pulled her off of Cathy. It was David. He helped Cathy to her feet and put his hand on her shoulder. “Are you okay?” Cathy nodded. “Would someone mind telling me ... what the hell is going on here?” he asked.

  Straightening out her blouse, Suze pointed at Cathy. “She started it.”

  “Liar,” Cathy spat back.

  David took the coffee cup out of Mary’s hand. “Thanks,” he took a sip. “I got tired of waiting for my coffee, so I thought I’d come get it myself. I didn’t expect to see two girls rolling around the floor like a couple of dogs in heat.” David walked over to Ned. “Jansen, what was the fight about?”

  “They were ... fighting over a guy.”

  “Ha. Should have figured that one out for myself,” David noted. “Were you the guy they were fighting over?”

  Ned shrugged. “Sort of. Me ... and that Private ... um ... Zacharius or something.”

  David had seen Michael around once or twice, but he really didn’t know Zacharius, never actually met him, but he heard quite a bit about him, from Mary and from others. Then he remembered seeing Cathy at the movies with him.

  And the light dawned. He slowly turned his head and looked at Cathy, but she avoided meeting David’s eyes. “I see,” he said.

  Chapter 78

  After the Commissary closed that night, David and Cathy sat across from each other at a table in the mess hall having a serious talk. They were the only ones in the place. He held both of her hands in his. “Are you sure you’re okay? I’ll take you into the examining room right now. No one else has to know.”

  Cathy smiled as she thought about how much it once would have meant to her to have David holding her hands the way he was now, and showing so much concern for her. Now, however, he was just a concerned doctor, and she was just a grateful patient. “I’m fine Dr. Mason, really. I mean, I appreciate you caring and all....”

  David interrupted. “If you start to feel sick at any time, you come see me. Promise me.”

  “I will. I promise.” Cathy slipped her hands out of David’s and moved them from the table to her lap.

  “I’m going to write you up that discharge notice so you can go home to the states.”

  “No!” Cathy started to feel panicky. “No, you can’t. I don’t want to leave h
ere. I can’t be gone when he ....”

  “Ah,” said David, “I see.” It didn’t take a medical degree to put two and two together. “You want to be here when Michael returns. He might ... Cathy, he might get sent somewhere else, you know.”

  Cathy shook her head adamantly. “No, he’s going to come back here. He knows I’m here and he’ll do whatever it takes to come back to me. I know he will. He can be very determined when he wants something.”

  With his hands still on the table top, David motioned for Cathy to let him hold her hands again. “You’ll see him again, I’m sure of it too,” David said reassuringly. “But until he comes back, I want you to know that I’m here for you, Cathy. Both you and your baby. Whatever you need.”

  At that moment, Norma burst into the Commissary and saw David and Cathy in what she interpreted as a compromising position, holding hands, and speaking in hushed tones. “Ah ha! I knew I’d find you with her. I just knew it.”

  Cathy looked at Norma, then at David, then at Norma again. She moved her hands out of David’s grasp.

  “Norma, this isn’t what you think.” He rose and walked toward her.

  “It never is. Get away from me, you Lothario.”

  David glanced back toward Cathy. He was obviously embarrassed. “Norma, you’re making a scene.”

  Cathy got up from the table and chuckled. “After what happened here this afternoon, this is nothing. I’ll leave you two alone to talk.”

  Norma shot Cathy a dirty look and mumbled under her breath as Cathy disappeared into the kitchen. “Bitch.”

  “Would you please calm down, Norma,” David beseeched. “What the hell is wrong with you anyway?”

  “Wrong with me? Are you freaking kidding me? You’re hardly ever around for me anymore, David, and when I finally see you,” she continued between sobs, “you’re having a clandestine meeting with Cinderella over there.”

  David laughed and put his hands on Norma’s face. “I’m not having clandestine meetings with anyone, Norma. I was just ... consulting with Cathy about a ... problem she’s having.”

  “A problem? You mean a teeny tiny problem that will be born in about 9 months?”

  David removed his hands from Norma’s face and looked at her sternly. “What are you talking about?”

  “Is she having your baby, David? Please be honest with me. I can’t stand being lied to.”

  David paused before speaking. “No, she’s not having my baby. That’s crazy. Where did you hear such a thing?”

  “Rumors spread fast around here. Everyone on base knows she fainted this afternoon, so we’re all speculating ....”

  David was livid. “Well stop it, do you hear me? Just stop it,” he shouted. “Cathy’s personal life is no one’s business.”

  “So it’s true? She’s pregnant?”

  “Jesus, Norma, would you just drop it.”

  “Fine. Then tell me this,” Norma asked. “Why are you so interested in her?”

  David looked into Norma’s eyes and thought carefully before answering. “I’m not. I’m not interested in her. Not the way you think.” David looked away. “She just ... reminds me ... of someone.”

  Norma knit her brow. “She reminds you of someone? What are you talking about?”

  David spoke more slowly than usual. “She ... looks ... like ... my wife. My late wife ... Judith.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a wallet-size picture of himself and Judith, and he showed it to Norma.

  “Oh my god, David. She looks exactly like Cathy.”

  “I know,” he said softly as he carefully tucked the photograph back into his pocket.

  “I’m sorry, David,” Norma said sincerely. “I had no idea.”

  David nodded and he held Norma’s face again. “Cathy may look like my late wife, but she’s not her. You’re the only woman I’m interested in. You’re the only woman I want. Am I making myself clear?”

  Tears were running down Norma’s cheeks. She nodded and David kissed her tenderly. When he broke the kiss, he whispered, “Let’s go back to my place.”

  Chapter 79

  “Almighty God, our sons, pride of our nation, this day have set upon a mighty endeavor, a struggle to preserve our Republic, our religion, and our civilization, and to set free a suffering humanity.”

  -- President Franklin Roosevelt

  ~June 6, 1944~

  Kay spent a lot of time over the past week wondering if she did the right thing by turning Alexander down and sending him away like she did. It should have given her closure, finished that unfinished business that had been gnawing at her ever since she left Merrifield. But it didn’t. If anything, that gnawing was stronger now.

  She kept second-guessing her decision and wondering whether she should have told Alexander she just needed time to think, instead of telling him it was over between them. But he shocked her by coming to see her on base that day, and stunned her even more by saying he wanted to marry her. Kay wasn’t the spontaneous type. She rarely did anything impulsive and she simply wasn’t prepared for Alexander’s visit. Even so, there was obviously something that made her say no to Alexander, when she could have easily said yes.

  But Kay didn’t have time to dwell on Alexander today. The surgical unit was packed. The wounded were arriving faster than the staff could triage them, let alone operate. Nurses were doing the jobs of doctors, medical assistants were doing the jobs of nurses, and non-medical personnel were serving as aids because there just weren’t enough medical professionals to deal with the number of casualties. Some soldiers died without ever being seen by a doctor or nurse. Others were beyond saving. This was a hundred times worse than anything Kay had seen as a doctor, and she thought by now she’d seen it all.

  The noise in the O.R. was deafening and the smells were sickening. Kay kept wiping the sweat from her forehead with the back of her sleeve. She wasn’t sure whether it was perspiration or tears that were blurring her vision; she just knew that this was the worst day she had experienced in surgery since she’d been here.

  Missing body parts, head and chest wounds that were inoperable, young men whose lives would never be the same if they even made it through surgery. And if she made it through surgery, she promised herself she would quit the Army, because she simply wasn’t cut out to deal with the horrors of war.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~

  Next door in Triage, the nurses were doing their best to keep up with the influx of wounded. Mary was evaluating each and every soldier as fast as she could, picking up chart after chart and quickly determining the priority order of treatment for each patient. She was so focused on her tasks that she did a double-take when she picked up a chart that had the name Michael Zacharius on it.

  Her head jerked up and she dropped the chart. Oh God. It was him. It was really Michael, lying on the gurney in front of her. She held her breath as she visually scanned his body, head to toe. “Nooooo,” she cried.

  Her gut twisted and she felt sick to her stomach when she saw the condition he was in. This can’t be happening, not to Michael. It was bad enough to take care of strangers who were wounded, dying, or dead. Mary had to steel herself to deal with them. But she obviously wasn’t as strong as she should be, because she couldn’t deal with this. She just couldn’t.

  Michael opened his eyes when Mary screamed. “Mary? Is that you?” he said quietly, struggling to speak. “What ... what happened to me? Am I dead?”

  Mary gripped Michael’s hand, holding it a little too tightly. She exhaled and found her voice. “No, of course you’re not dead,” she answered, fighting back her tears and trying to sound normal. “But you ... you were wounded.”

  Michael tried to lift his head. “Where? Where was I wounded? Where was I shot?”

  “Um. You were wounded ... in France. And you were brought back here to base. We’re going to take care of you, Michael.”

  “No ... I mean ... where ... where on my body ... was I wounded? Where?” When Mary didn’t answer, he strained to lift his head a litt
le higher. His eyes widened and he let out a guttural cry.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~

  Above the endless roar of noise, Kay heard screams coming from the Triage unit next door. She looked at David who had just finished operating on a patient. Through her surgical mask, she called to him. “David! I think I heard Mary screaming. I can’t leave my patient. Can you ....?”

  David nodded at Kay. “I’ll check it out.” David left the operating theater and jogged over to Triage to see what the commotion was about.

  Chapter 80

  “We shot at everything that moved. The beach was soon covered with the bodies of American soldiers.”