Out of the Shadow

by J. L. Paul

  She nodded, but the questions still lingered in her eyes. He released the last of his tension from his shoulders. He scooped up some bubbles and blew them at her face, making her shriek.

  “All right, enough of that,” RJ chastised. “We’d like some plates so we can eat.”

  Ally snorted. “Yeah, like that’s stopped you before.”

  RJ just flashed his boyish grin and shrugged.

  After they ate, they all worked together to get things put away. Cole kept a close eye on Robby and Ally and his fears grew. It seemed to him that they shared quite a few inside jokes and he wasn’t sure he liked it in the least. He hated thinking that way about either of them – he honestly liked Robby and he loved and trusted Ally – but he was becoming more and more threatened by their friendship and it startled him how close they’d become in such a short time.

  No, he didn’t much like it.

  They managed to make a huge dent in the boxes by the time Robby bid them goodnight with Jamie and Ally not too far behind him since they both had early classes. RJ and Cole walked them out, thanking them over and over for their help and making plans to get together soon.

  Cole tugged Ally in his arms and kissed her hard on the mouth. “Come see me tomorrow after practice, princess.”

  “Okay,” she said as Jamie dragged her out the door.

  ***

  Ally pulled the nylon track pants over her legs and sat on the bench, lost in thought as she lifted her right foot and tied her shoe. Tryouts were over, thank goodness, and she’d made the team, but that meant conditioning which could be brutal.

  She’d been pondering Cole’s brief moment of strange behavior the other night when she’d joined him at the sink to help wash plates. He’d seemed cold and angry at her and she couldn’t figure out why. Unless Robby…

  No, Robby wouldn’t have said anything. Robby would leave it to her discretion on whether or not she’d tell Cole what had happened. Robby wouldn’t do that to her or to Cole.

  But something had been wrong. She just wished she knew.

  She tied her other shoe and stood, reaching for her hoodie, when Danielle approached, smug smile on her lips. Ally drew air through her nose and held it, hoping the oxygen contained a bit of patience because she had a feeling she was going to need it.

  “I heard a rumor that Cole Crawford and RJ Shaw rented a place around here,” Danielle said, blocking Ally’s path to the door. “Is it true?”

  Ally released the breath she’d been holding and rolled her eyes. “Look, I’m not telling anyone where Cole and RJ live – they’d prefer to have a bit of privacy.”

  “I know,” Danielle said, tilting her head with a false, sympathetic smile on her face. “But if they have a housewarming party or anything, well, they’ll let you invite your friends, won’t they?”

  Ally shrugged and picked up her bag. “Sure, but they’re not having a party – at least they haven’t said anything about it.”

  “Hey, maybe you could ask them,” Danielle suggested. “You don’t have to invite a bunch of people – maybe just a couple of us. I know a few select people you might like.”

  Ally laughed sarcastically and shouldered her bag. She’d known it was coming, had suspected it when Danielle had become friendly with her all of a sudden. Anger flared inside and drew her to her full height, which wasn’t much to begin with, as she glared at the other girl. “If they want to have a party, they’ll have a party. I’m not asking them to do it and if they do decide to have one and they tell me to invite my friends, I’m not interested in inviting your ‘select’ people. I’d prefer to have my real friends.”

  She brushed past Danielle and stalked out the door, not stopping until she reached her car. She tossed her bag in the backseat and fired up the engine, fuming the entire way to Cole’s house.

  She stormed into the house and found Cole in the recliner, remote control in hand. “Hey, princess.”

  “Do not call me that,” she said through clenched teeth.

  He lifted a brow and set the recliner in its upright position. He got up and wrapped his arms around her. “What’s the matter?”

  “Nothing,” she said, cooling in his arms. She ran her hands up his chest and laced her fingers behind his head. “Nothing that matters, now.”

  He gave her a half smile then pecked her lips. “Something had you all in a tizzy. What was it?”

  “Some stupid girl on the basketball team. She wants me to have you guys throw a party and invite her,” she said, tugging on his neck until his lips reached hers. “I pretty much told her to bug off.”

  He chuckled and kissed her again. “Sounds like you, princess, but I thought you wanted to make some friends at school?”

  “I have all the friends I need,” she said, tangling her fingers in his hair. It had grown longer while he was away, reaching his collar, and she loved how soft it was between her fingers. “I have you, of course, my favorite friend.” She smiled at him and earned another kiss. “And I have Jamie and RJ, and Shannon. And Robby. Who else do I need?”

  His smile faltered and the playfulness left his eyes. He drew back slightly and gripped her hips. “Al, you and Robby are getting pretty close, huh?”

  Her heart missed a beat as her throat suddenly dried. “I guess.”

  She could see him struggling with words and it frightened her. He stepped out of her embrace and ran his hands through his hair. “Maybe I’m crazy or jealous or something but it sort of bugged me the other night how close you two have become in such a short time.”

  “Cole,” she protested.

  He held up a hand. “And then he told us that you got drunk at some party and he had to pick you up.” He spun on his heel and faced her, his expression one of bewilderment. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me, Al?”

  “I don’t know,” she said panicking. “I was embarrassed.”

  “With me?” he asked. “Seriously?”

  “I was mad at you,” she said, biting her lip. “Hurt.”

  “So you call Robby Redden and he picks you up and takes you to his place where you spend the night and you don’t tell me that,” he said, his face flushed with anger. “How could you not tell me that, huh? Are you hiding something?”

  “I…no,” she said, tears burning her eyes. She dropped to the recliner and studied her hands. “I kissed him, Cole.”

  He stilled, his hands fisted at his sides. His brown eyes blazed with anger and pain. “You…you kissed Robby Redden?” She nodded. He turned away from her, cursing loudly. He located a pack of cigarettes in the pocket of a jacket hanging near the door. He lit one and tossed the lighter on the coffee table before stalking to the kitchen.

  Terrified, she followed. She paused in the doorway and watched as he planted his palms on the counter near the sink and ducked his head, his cigarette between two fingers, releasing ribbons of smoke in the air.

  “I didn’t mean to kiss him, Cole,” she said, her voice barely over a whisper. “I was drunk and upset and he was trying to comfort me. But he, um, stopped it. He told me that it was wrong and that I didn’t mean it.”

  He sucked in a breath and slowly shifted toward her. “He stopped the kiss – not you. He did?”

  “Yeah,” she said, realizing her mistake. But she couldn’t keep it from him any longer. She couldn’t stand lying to him, even if it meant the pain on his face. She took a step toward him. “Cole…”

  He held up one hand while the other lifted the cigarette to his lips. “I don’t want to hear your excuses anymore, Ally. I just can’t believe you’d get drunk and kiss my producer’s son. What the hell?”

  “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

  “I’m sure,” he snarled.

  She whipped her head up and glared at him. “I really am.”

  “Yeah and so am I,” he growled back. “Damn it, Al, here I am fighting myself to not ask you to marry me yet and you’re making out with Robby Redden behind my back!”

  His words struck her hard. She gaped at h
im, her lips moving but no words coming out. The ugly hatred marring his face stabbed her heart and she wished she could make it disappear.

  “I didn’t make out with him,” she snapped.

  “You would have had he not stopped you,” Cole said. He whipped around toward the sink and turned on the tap. He stuck his cigarette under it, making it sizzle, and when he was confident it was out, he tossed it in the trash. “You need to leave, Ally. I don’t know what to think just yet. This…it’s just not right.”

  “Cole, what are you saying?” she asked, her heart shattering.

  “I’m saying that I can’t be with you right now. I think it’s best if we take some time apart to think about this.”

  She stiffened her spine, furious at his words. “You think it’s best, huh? Fine, whatever you say!”

  She turned on her heel and marched toward the door as it opened, admitting RJ and Jamie, their arms laden with grocery bags.

  “Get out of my way,” Ally ordered, pushing them aside. Jamie set his bags on the floor as he shot RJ a confused look, then ran after her.

  “What’s the matter, cuz?” he asked.

  “Nothing. I need to get out of here,” she said, her keys rattling in her trembling hand. Tears streaked down her cheeks and Jamie took the keys and pushed her into the passenger’s seat.

  “I’ll take you home, cuz,” he said, kissing her forehead. “Let’s go.”

  She nodded, fighting the urge to glance at the house as Jamie drove her back to the dorm. She didn’t want to take the chance of seeing him in the window – it would kill her.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Cole let himself into his father’s house and strolled casually to the kitchen where Stacy was bent over a counter, perusing a recipe book. He placed a quick kiss on her cheek and startled her.

  “Cole!” she exclaimed, pressing a hand to her heart. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

  He forced a grin and shrugged. “Didn’t mean to scare you.” He looked over her shoulder, feigning interest in chicken recipes. “Is the old man around?”

  “No,” she said, frowning. “He’s at the studio. He said he’d be home by five, though, if you want to hang around and wait. You can stick around for dinner, if you’d like.”

  “Sure,” he said with another nonchalant shrug. “I think I’ll head downstairs, if you don’t mind.”

  “Cole, this is still your home even if you do have your own place,” Stacy said, placing a hand on his arm. “Is everything all right?”

  “Yeah, sure,” he said, flashing a toothy smile. “Thanks.” He brushed past her and pounded down the stairs. He didn’t pause in the rec room or peek into the utility room, just went straight to the music room. He selected a pair of drumsticks and sat on the stool behind his old kit. The pain in his heart had been festering for days and he’d tried to hold it all in. He hadn’t fallen apart at all – not even when he’d told RJ what Ally had confessed to him.

  But the pain wouldn’t stay cooped up for long. He needed an outlet and he knew he’d find it behind a set of drums. He started pounding, letting loose as a rhythm flowed through his veins. Perspiration began to collect on his brow and the back of his neck but it didn’t deter him. He hoped maybe he could sweat out some of the hurt that Ally had inflicted on him. Maybe then he’d be able to think clearly. Maybe he’d be able to eat something substantial. Maybe he’d be able to sleep at night.

  Twenty minutes later, he noticed his dad, Jay, and Richie watching him from the doorway. He stopped, wiped the sweat from his brow with his shirt sleeve, and set the sticks carefully on the snare drum.

  “Hey, what’s up?” he asked, his expression casual.

  “Just listening to the master,” Nate quipped as he walked into the room and perched on a chair. “What were you playing?”

  “Nothing,” he said, lifting a shoulder. “Just messing around.”

  “Yeah, sure you were,” Jay said, concern lingering in his eyes. “I haven’t seen you go off like that since…well, it’s been awhile.”

  Cole knew Jay had been about to say that Cole hadn’t drummed so hard since his mother had died and he was probably right. But he didn’t want to get into the source of his pain at that particular minute – not with Richie and Jay hanging around. He’d hoped to speak to his dad privately. As much as he liked Richie and Jay, and even though they both treated him as if he was their own – he preferred confiding in his father. Besides, Jay was Ally’s father.

  “What are you old people doing?” he joked as he tapped his fingers on the snare drum, making the sticks dance. “Did you come to watch me enviously? Wishing you were young again?”

  “Jeez, Nate,” Richie said as he opened the fridge, grabbed a bottle of water, and tossed it to Cole. “Cocky kid you got there.”

  “I know,” Nate said, considering Cole carefully. He nodded at his son. “You staying for dinner?”

  “Yeah,” Cole said. “Richie never taught RJ how to cook so it’s probably slim pickings at my place.”

  Richie grinned at him and clapped Jay on the back. “Speaking of food, I’d better get home. Are you sure you don’t mind dropping me off?”

  “Nope,” Jay said. “I’ll see you Saturday, Cole.”

  “See ya,” Cole said. He picked up the sticks and rolled them between his fingers as his dad waited for the door to shut.

  “What’s the matter, kid?” Nate asked, his expression grave.

  Cole tapped the sticks together, drawing oxygen through his nose as he fought the burning sensation behind his eyes. He didn’t want to break down and cry like a child in front of his father, yet the feeling was always there.

  “I’m not sure what’s going on, Dad,” he said, staring at the two pieces of wood in his hands. “Things aren’t so hot with Ally right now.”

  “I sort of figured,” Nate said. “Jay thought maybe so, also. Ally has been sort of moody the last couple times Jay has talked to her.”

  “She kissed someone else,” Cole said, not wanting to drag Robby’s name into it just yet. “She was upset over that stupid magazine article and went to some party. She got drunk and…” he sighed. He quickly explained what happened, admitting to his father that it might not be such a big deal but it was killing him. “And I don’t know what to do about it.”

  “Did you two break up?” Nate asked.

  Cole nodded half-heartedly. “Sort of. I just told her I couldn’t be with her at this time.” He sighed and shoved the sticks in his back pocket so he could push his hair back. “I just need to sort through all this and figure out what I want to do.”

  “That’s exactly what you have to do, son,” Nate said. “You need to work through your feelings and figure out if you’ll be able to forgive her.”

  “I just can’t think straight.”

  Nate got up and walked around the drum kit. He placed a hand on Cole’s shoulder. “Then tell her that, Cole. Tell her to give you a chance to wrap your head around it then when you get things sorted, you two can talk.”

  Cole nodded, scrubbing his face. He was very near tears and he swallowed frantically in hopes of stifling them. He wished he could just let it all out like he used to when he was a kid and his mother did stupid stuff that upset him, but he couldn’t. He wasn’t a child anymore.