One Summer With Autumn

by Julie Reece

  Comes right to the point, I see. But then, why would the CEO of a big corporation waste time with pleasantries? I sneeze and grab a Kleenex from the box on the end table. My nose runs, and my mouth is dry. I use my mental thumb and index finger to make a gun, point it at my temple, and pull the trigger.

  “Yes.” There doesn’t seem to be any coming back from this morning, so I decide to go with brutal honestly. “I have looked forward to meeting you for weeks. Admired the fact that you, a woman, runs such a cool, successful company. Then you find me in here. Like this.” I gesture at my stupid pajamas. “With your son. How can anyone hope to explain that type of fiasco, I wonder?”

  Her eyebrows rise, then she breaks into a careful smile. “I think I understand.”

  “You do?” I hug a pillow to my chest, unable to pretend this interview will salvage anything. That anything I do or say now can possibly improve what this woman thinks of me. “Can you explain it to me?”

  She actually laughs. “Jesse vouched for you. And don’t forget I know a little about my son. He can be very persistent when he makes up his mind.”

  Truth. Maybe there’s hope for me yet.

  “I won’t keep you. I only wanted to welcome you properly as we weren’t able to speak this morning.” She glances at the door. “I really should get back downstairs. Piper is making her delicious marinated bison steaks, Caden’s favorite dish. You’ll forgive us tonight, won’t you? We’re all like family and have so much catching up to do.” I stop my head bobbing in agreement, because it hurts. “I’m glad you understand.”

  Oh, I understand. You’re the second person to warn me off Caden today. No need to bludgeon the poor, dead horse.

  “Well, then.” She rises. “I’m happy to bring up a tray later, if you like.”

  “Thanks, but I’ll be okay to just sleep for tonight.”

  “All right then, rest up. We need you in tip-top condition for the festival. We’re expecting a lot from you on that account, Ms. Teslow.”

  “I’ll do my best,” I say, before barking like a trained seal. My cheeks flame, and it’s all I can do not to groan.

  Mrs. Behr pauses once more at the door. “No need to worry about that now. You just get better. We’ll be occupied downstairs for hours.”

  As the door closes, I imagine Piper and Caden downstairs with the rest of his family. Laughing and talking, they’ll probably play cards after dinner, or an all-night game of Risk or Monopoly, like they’ve done for years.

  If I could hit myself in the head with a hammer and knock myself out, I would. Instead, I lay wrestling with my thoughts, feeling more alone than I ever have in my life.

  24

  Caden

  My mother lounges in the window seat of my room, staring out onto the freshly mown lawn. In her hand are the emails from Autumn’s father that I printed from my laptop. The last dated the day we got back from our camping trip. No need for me to read it again, the words are branded on my memory.

  Dear Mr. Behr,

  I hope this letter finds you well.

  Through communications with my eldest daughter, and the disappointing lack of emails from you of late, I’m left with concerns that Autumn isn’t receiving the experience promised us this summer. I believed the disciplined, boot camp atmosphere I expected might bring about personal responsibility. That a summer of menial chores and physical labor might bring an appreciation for higher learning. Instead, it appears she’s spent almost the entire summer doing little more than enjoying the simple pleasures of a Girl’s Scout camping trip and petting zoo. Not to mention, talk of a flirtation with another employee. All unwelcome distractions to our end goal, Mr. Behr.

  As there are only two weeks left of her term there, it is my hope that you will reevaluate the situation and salvage the project. Otherwise, I fear what began as an excellent prospect for remediation will end a waste of time.

  I look forward to your next email.

  Yours,

  William Oskar Teslow

  “It’s twisted how he calls his daughter a project. He wants me to punish her.” Sadistic bastard. “You have no idea what she’s been through. What she faces at home. I told him the internship would lack modern conveniences, roughing it in the outdoors. I never promised a prison camp for troubled teens.”

  In the light of the window, my mother’s face appears stressed and worn. I don’t want to pile on, but I need her to understand what’s going on.

  Her smile is weary, or maybe just sad, as she shakes her head. “Well, look at you.”

  “What?” When she faces me, I’m confused by the sheen glossing her eyes. “What’s the matter?”

  “Nothing, really. I think this might be okay.” She must see the look of confusion on my face, because her smile pulls wider. “Oh, Caden. For four years, I’ve watched you struggling without your father here to guide you. I wanted to help, and I tried, but you and I reacted to his loss differently than your brothers did. People grieve their own way, and in their own time. I knew that, but I pushed you anyway, as hard as I pushed myself. Now I see we all have to make our own choices—and live with them.”

  My eyebrows pinch. “Sorry, you lost me, Mom.”

  “Scott has asked me to marry him.”

  “Scott Frey?” Was I kicked in the head by a goat? I sound like an idiot, but an engagement announcement is not what I expected her to say next.

  She laughs. “Yes, son. What other Scott do we know that I might consider marrying?”

  I suspected they might take their relationship to the next level. Someday. But I had no idea they’d gotten to this point. “So, what did you tell him?”

  “No. The first three times he asked, I said no.”

  I’m not sure what she wants me to say. Congratulations, mazal tov, this sucks … My mind is a churning maelstrom of questions. If he asked her three times, is this four? “How long has this been going on? Do the others know?” My fingers knead together. Shit. “Does Piper know she’s going to be my step-sister?” I kissed my step-sister. Yeah, that sounds about right.

  Mom smirks. “You’re not related by blood, you dope.” She shifts in the seat letting her head rest on the glass pane. “We’ve told everyone now, but Piper. Scott wants to do that in person next weekend when he’s here.

  “The first time he asked me was a year after your father died, but I wouldn’t even consider it then. He asks me every anniversary of his first asking, and vows he will for the rest of his life.” A wistful smile shows how romantic she thinks this is. “We agreed not to say anything to our families. You’ve been through so much. And then when you and Piper had your falling out, I didn’t want you to have to adjust to another change. Even a good one.”

  That gets my attention. I’m quiet until she looks up. “You really want this, then? To marry him?”

  She bites her lip. “Not if it will make you unhappy.”

  “That’s not what I asked.”

  “I wouldn’t hurt you for the world, Caden.”

  My head falls back with my exhale. How long have I been wallowing in self-pity while my family tiptoed around me? As if they haven’t lost every bit as much as I have. No wonder Dex kept beating the shit out of me in high school.

  “I know.” She’s already sacrificed so much for us, now she’s willing to be alone and lonely if it would make me happy. My fingers lace the hair at the back of my head. “I’m sorry.” I rise, make my way to the window seat, and force myself into the too small space with her. My arms wrap around her shoulders, squeezing her in a bear hug until she complains. “I’m an ass,” I say, releasing her.

  She smiles. “You’re stubborn, like your father. But there’s some of me in there, too,” she says, squeezing my shoulder. “That’s why it’s taken us longer to let go. We both thought moving on meant leaving him behind, but we were wrong.”

  My throat tightens, making the words harder to get out. “Dad would want you to be happy.” She pulls back, gaze carefully searching my face. “I mean it. No one el
se is ever going to be good enough for you, but Scott’s always been there for us. You say you wouldn’t hurt me, well, you need to be happy, too, Mom.”

  Because I’m about to fall off the narrow seat, I get up and head back to my chair. My mother wipes her eyes. Only now am I struck by the habit I’ve seen her perform so many times over the last few years. She pretended that she could hide her grief, and caught up in my own pain, I pretended to let her.

  “I’m sorry. For everything.” My voice catches, which is annoying. I clear it and start again. “I suppose this means you and Jesse, and Piper will plan a wedding soon.” God help us. I watch as relief softens her face. Her posture relaxes, and I think she’s good, even excited. “Please don’t ask me to wear some baby blue monkey suit on the beach in Jamaica, all right?”

  Her smirk makes no promises and I cringe.

  “So, are we good here?” I’m glad we talked, but I don’t think I can handle much more of Baring-my-soul Day with my mother.

  “We’re good but not finished. There’s still this … ” She reaches for the crumpled emails on the seat beside her. “I told you about Scott first, for a reason. After your dad died, I realized how little we control in life. When I couldn’t manage his death, or you kids, I managed the business. It was the one thing I could control, and for a while, what I needed to survive. The reason I pushed you about school, and Piper, and the internship, is because I wanted something to anchor you the same way. Though, I never dreamed it would be your summer hire.”

  “That doesn’t—”

  “Save it.” She waves me off. “Somewhere along the way, I forgot you’re not my little boy anymore. You have to live your own life, son, and so do I. I guess I owe you an apology, too.”

  She’s setting me free. Me, Dad, herself, she’s letting it all go. The pressure crushing my chest is back, because I know how hard this is for her.

  “Date who you want. Go to school where you want.” She sighs. “Just try not to torture us with your choices if you can help it.”

  “Aw, Mom. You know I live for that.”

  “I know!” Her laugh sounds so good. “Just, Caden, this girl seems so … different from us.”

  “Mom?”

  “I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, but you can’t base a loving relationship on rescue. She’s not a lost dog or turtle with a broken shell. If she comes from a family dynamic like this … ” Mom lifts the emails and settles them again on her lap.

  “Mom … ?”

  “Well, I can’t imagine her self-esteem could be very good. She may have her own issues to work through that would challenge a healthy relationship.”

  Really? “Mom! This is pointless considering the level ten hatred Autumn harbors for me since I repeatedly lied to her. Not to mention this conversation bears a striking resemblance to those you just promised not to give anymore. The ones where you give me bossy, dating advice?” Internally, I give my mom points, having sifted through similar doubts myself. But seeing Autumn for who she is takes looking past the obvious. She’s strong, and smart. She cares deeply, about so many things, but is afraid to let anyone know. I have more faith in her than I do in myself.

  “Okay, okay.” Mom laughs. “All I wanted to say is that if you pursue her beyond work or even friendship, make sure it’s for the right reasons for both your sakes.”

  I rise, walk to where my mother sits on her perch, and drop a kiss on her cheek. “This was fun. Next time, let’s get our hair done while we chat.” She slaps my arm, drawing out my smile. “I’ll see you later.”

  I’m almost out the door when I hear, “Caden?” I shift, glancing over my shoulder. “Honey, if you do choose Autumn, be careful with Piper. She’ll be okay, but it will be hard for her.”

  I nod again, mood plummeting. Piper is my oldest friend. Hurting her again is the last thing I want to do.

  25

  Autumn

  At five a.m. the morning of the festival, I get a text from Sydney.

  Sydney: Come to the Happy Heifer Motel in Cowpens. Room 7. ASAP.

  I scrub the sleep from my eyes and text back.

  Me: Cowpens? As in, you’re here in town?

  Sydney: How many Happy Heifer Motels do you think there are? Get here pronto.

  Seriously? Now you want to talk?

  I’d been asleep for hours, and though my flu’s gone, I’m still not one hundred percent. When my dress never arrived in the mail, I’d given up. Syd’s phone went straight to voicemail, and she hadn’t answered my texts for three days.

  The sun’s not even up yet, but I climb in the shower and rinse off. If this is some kind of cruel joke, there’s no telling what sort of evil torture I’ll devise. Maybe have her dress in non-designer jeans at gunpoint and be seen in public. That ought to do it. Still, her text sounded urgent, and if she’s flown here all the way from New York, maybe something bad happened.

  Dressed in a pair of frumpy gray sweats and black tank, I throw on my tennis shoes and knock on Jesse’s door. I need a car. No way am I going to Caden. I’ve successfully avoided everyone else in the house for days, and I’m not starting now. Jesse said she’d handle my lack of evening wear for Moo. I swear if she wasn’t already taken, I’d adopt her. She’s the only one I trust.

  I’m supposed to be downtown at ten o’clock for the Moo parade. Plenty of time to find out what my idiot sister needs, and get back to prepare.

  Jesse squints at me through a crack in the door. “What’s wrong?”

  “I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “Can I borrow your car? My sister called. She’s here. In Cowpens. I think she might be in trouble.”

  “Uh, sure,” she says. “Hang on.” I hear movement and mumbling on the other side of the door. The two minutes it takes for her to find her keys feels more like two hours. Finally, the door opens and she emerges fully dressed. “Let’s go.”

  “Oh,” I whisper, “thanks but you don’t need to—”

  “What’s going on?” Caden stumbles into the hall in a pair of low-slung, cotton sleep pants and no shirt. Even in the dim lighting, the cut of his abs is clearly defined. He runs a hand through his rumpled hair and looks sexy as hell doing it.

  “Autumn’s sister called.” Jesse’s hand flops while she explains. “She’s here, in town. Needs a ride.”

  “I’ve got this. Go back to bed, Jess. I’ll take her.” Caden disappears into his room.

  “No!” Gah! I lower my voice. “I mean, that’s okay. I need a car, but no one has to drive me. I don’t even know if anything’s—”

  Jesse turns her back to me and shuffles to her room, waving. “Sorry, Autumn, it’s done now.” I swear there’s a hint of sadistic pleasure in her tone over this.

  Embarrassment fights frustration as Caden strides down the hall fully clothed. “Let’s go.”

  The car ride to Cowpens is quick. Standing in front of room seven, my mood is one-part genuine concern and two-parts Mumm-Ra the “ever-living source of evil” that my sister gave no clue as to what she’s doing here.

  Caden reaches around me and knocks. He insisted on driving, then on walking me to the door. I’m grateful, I guess, but also annoyed. I don’t want to be this close to him, with his chest lightly pressed against my back and his minty breath on my skin. Mercifully, he didn’t say much on the drive over. My worry for my sister must be all over my face, but I could tell the way he kept peering at me from his seat he wants to talk.

  There’s nothing to say.

  The door swings wide and Sydney squeals at a pitch only dolphins understand. “Oh,” she says, eyeing Caden behind me. “Well, isn’t this a slice of awkward.” I don’t know what she’s talking about until I see Alex sitting in a white, plastic chair on the other side of her tiny room. His dark hair is longer, curling against his neck, but he’s dressed in his customary dark jeans and death-metal T-shirt. Some things never change.

  “Come on in,” Sydney says. “It’s us! Fun surprise, am I right? Ha, ha, ha.”

  Nope. “Syd, wh
at’s going on?” Alex stands but quickly looks from me to Caden. The pause gets lengthy, then uncomfortable, so I end it. “You scared me half to death. Why are you here?”

  She scrunches her nose like a hamster. “Careful, little sister, I’ll think you’re not glad to see me. I’m here to help you with the beauty pageant, of course. How could I leave you down here to make a fool of yourself alone? I didn’t mail your dress because I brought it with me. Surprise!” Her jazz hands break free, and with them, my eyes roll. Relief and anger battle for first place in my stomach. At least I know why she’s been ignoring my texts.

  Everyone’s eyes are on Alex as he steps forward. “Hey, Autumn. I tagged along with Sydney. I hope you don’t mind.”

  Mind? Oh no, I don’t mind that you, my cheating-ex-boyfriend, (the one I hoped never to see again) showed up on pageant day unannounced. I shift to introduce Caden, and catch his expression. He’s smiling at Alex in a tight, forced, I’d-enjoy–peeling-the-skin-off–you-like-a-twelve-point buck, smile.

  Well crap.

  “Alex, this is my boss, Caden. He drove me here when I was worried my sister was in mortal danger. Caden, this is Alex. We went to school together.” Neither of them looks very happy with the way I’ve described them. Or it might be they didn’t hear me at all, as neither has taken their eyes off the other.

  “Are there any other hotels in this town?” Sydney asks, seemingly oblivious to the weirdness. “We just got in, but I couldn’t find another thing close on Google Maps.” She stops fooling with her phone and shakes it in the air at Caden. “Did I miss another hotel, B and B, anything? I’m not sure I can handle that hanging over my head all night.”

  True. The that in her sentence refers to a steer head with horns the size of Texas hanging over her single bed.

  Caden straightens to his six-plus-whatever-foot status. “Tell the front desk you’ve decided not to stay. You can bunk at the house with us. Both of you.” The last feels tacked on as an afterthought, and I wonder if it is.