Around the World in 80 Girls: The Epic 3 Year Trip of a Backpacking Casanova

by Neil Skywalker

  Charlize and I said goodbye the following morning when she had to fly back to Sau Paulo. I promised to visit her once I reached Sau Paulo and she said I could stay at her place. I was happy to hear that because Brazil isn’t a cheap destination for a holiday.

  I went back to Brazil the same day by myself and visited the Itapu dam. It wasn’t easy to get there on my own. Except for the people at the dam I didn’t meet anyone who spoke a bit of English and even my Spanish was misunderstood all the time. But that was probably my own fault since I barely spoke any. The Itapu dam is the world’s second largest hydro dam and it’s interesting to see how they harnessed the awesome power of water. I battled myself a way back through local buses and the Brazilian and Argentina border and met a nice guy back in the hostel in Puerto de Iguazu. His name was Larry and he was an American from San Francisco. He was on a short trip of a few months through South America. A fun guy to hang out with but also up for a real conversation.

  My little romance with Charlize had brought back my fighting spirit out regarding girls but I felt guilty about going out that night and going hunting for local poon. We stayed in and played Gran Turisimo 3 half the night on the Playstation in the guesthouse.

  Larry was on his way down south and we decided to go there together. We took a bus to Rosario, the place where the hottest girls in Argentina come from. I had read on the Internet that it had a five-to-one girl-guy ratio. Larry and I talked about picking up girls and I mentioned my site.

  We met the hottest girl cop ever at a road block. We were almost the only guys in the bus and she checked our passports. To this day I regret not acting like a damn tourist and coming up with a silly story so I could take a picture with her. She was an eight in looks and probably one of the cutest girls I had ever seen in my life. She looked sexy in her uniform and I daydreamed about her arresting me.

  Argentina – Rosario

  Larry and I stayed in a shitty hostel in Rosario and talked about girls. I had just read a booklet about picking up Argentinean girls written by Roosh. This booklet however had scared the living daylights out of me. It described a sort of girl I had not yet encountered on my trip: the coldhearted Latina chick, nearly impossible to pick up, with a bitch shield up to the roof and who would not reply to your texts or calls.

  A large amount of time, a social circle and even lots of money was needed to get with one of these girls. They were considered the hardest of the hard to pick up and I feared that my plans of picking one up were out the door. I had no money or a social circle there; I don’t have a great style in clothes. Hell, I look like what I am, a travelling backpacker bum.

  We went out that night and couldn’t find any place to go. We were there during the week and pretty much all bars were closed down or there was little to do inside. We changed hostels the next day and found a livelier one. During the day we walked around the city a bit, looked at some sights and took pictures. We tried to day game a bit but were too scared to even approach some girls. We walked around the city and every time we saw a cute girl we tried to push each other to open her. I made one half-assed attempt to talk to a girl but her English was very bad. Larry helped out a bit since his Spanish was a lot better than mine. It led nowhere but it gave me a little boost.

  Day-gaming is only for the strong and I had almost never done it. It is damn hard to just walk up to a girl in the street and start talking; it is hard in your own country but when you’re in a country where not many people speak English it really makes you self-conscious and you feel like an instant moron sometimes. My approach anxiety went through the roof.

  The stories were true, though: we saw an unbelievable number of hotties and not that many guys around. We even asked a taxi driver and the hostel owner about the girl ratio and they both confirmed that there were way more girls than guys.

  In the afternoon Larry came up with the idea of using the Internet to find some girls. He logged on and sent out about thirty messages to girls on a website called Couchsurfing. I told him that I thought it was only for staying at their houses but Larry said you could also use this website to meet people for coffee.

  A few hours later a couple of girls replied to his email and they came to meet us. They were two sisters and one of them was good–looking, but no stunner. We went out to an Irish pub and ate a pizza and drank some beers. I tried to game the younger sister but failed. She went home while her older sister stayed with us. We went to play some pool and later went bowling at the same place. The three of us had a lot of fun that night and I noted down that I had to start using this website myself.

  It was time to move on and we went to Cordoba.

  Argentina – Cordoba

  Cordoba was supposed the ultimate place to score girls, according to most Argentineans. The city is a lot cheaper than Buenos Aires, girls have better attitudes and the city has eight universities, all full of hot young girls. All the ingredients for a successful time. But fear had struck in my heart and I was getting scared of approaching girls in clubs. The fact that Larry was scared too didn’t help much.

  Charlize contacted me daily and messaged me how much she missed me. I began wondering if it was all worth it. Should I just give up on my challenge to bang 80 girls? I had already had lost so much precious time in the beginning of my trip and again in Australia and New Zealand. I would never make it. I wondered if what I did with Charlize actually counted as picking up. Maybe it was a romance, like so many people have on a holiday. The pressure of scoring got to me and maybe I should go back to just travelling with the occasional bang, just like all other travelers. But that idea was scary too.

  We were sitting with a small group of people in the hostel kitchen when two girls mentioned that they were from Greenland. Larry nearly choked on his drink when he heard me ask if Greenland had its own passports. He knew why I asked that question. The answer was no, Greenland is still part of Denmark. I already knew that but wanted to make sure. I decided that if I could get with one of them I would make an exception to the flagging rules. Normally I treat any country that has its own passport as a separate flag, but Greenland was just too special with its 58,000 inhabitants. I wanted that flag and I wanted it badly. So much for self-doubt.

  The whole hostel group went out that night and we went to a club somewhere not too far from the center. The two Greenland girls were cute but no stunners. They also weren’t interested in me, except for having me in the friend zone. They were interested in two uninteresting and ugly Argentinean guys. One even had braces and a stupid expression on his face. What made them get the girls? Probably being Latino and having the balls to approach.

  Argentinean guys have aggressive game, not as aggressive as the Brazilian caveman game but still pretty hostile. They will just grab a girl and start dancing, there’s no asking involved. Larry said I should do the same but I was too chicken to just grab a girl. We both got frustrated with girls and with each other. Half-drunk, we left the club and jumped in a taxicab. Larry and I slept in the same dorm room and nobody else was there. We had a massive discussion about our approach fears. I was bitching and complaining and quite frankly overreacting.

  We almost got into an argument over it and I felt like I had hit rock bottom. I was back to square one, couldn’t pull any confidence out of earlier conquests.

  I slept off my hangover the next morning, when I realized that I had forgotten my jacket at the club the night before, the one I had just bought ten days before. I grumped myself through the day, had a short talk with Larry and felt ashamed for my bitching and self-pity the night before.

  The same day, a major breakthrough happened. I got in touch with Darren, the buddy I traveled with for six weeks in Indonesia. He was already in South America for a while and was visiting Cordoba again. We agreed to meet in a club that night.

  I went over to the massive club by myself. I couldn’t find Darren and he didn’t answer the phone. All disappointed I drank some beer, which came in one-liter glasses.

  It was dark inside
with only the strobe flashing and I was standing against some pillar and looked around a bit. I looked at some guy standing close to me and he looked at me at exactly the same moment. We both looked away and then I realized it: it was Darren! He realized it the same moment and we jumped up and hugged each other. Man, was I happy to see him, and he was even happier to see me.

  He introduced me to a Danish girl who he was hanging out with but I barely noticed her. I was glowing and felt strong. It was so good to see someone again I had spent six full weeks with, travelling through a third world country, having all kinds of adventures together and me being some sort of a mentor to him for picking up girls and other stuff. We had gone out many times and even kissed the same girl. While we were downing another liter of beer I felt my balls grow to epic proportions. I was on fucking fire and walked straight up to two girls passing us by and started talking.

  “Hey, where are you going?” I said to them when I saw that they were heading for the stairs to the second dance floor. They started talking Spanish and knew only a few words of English. I soldiered on with some horrible Spanish and didn’t care what they thought about it. I remembered the words my friends from Chile had taught me in Moscow: “Te quiero dar un beso” (I want to kiss you). I whispered it in her ear and she turned her head and kissed me. I pushed her against the wall and made out with her. We danced a bit and had a drink. Darren tried to get with the other girl but it looked she wasn’t that much in to him and he went to look for the Danish girl.

  My girl was ready to go and I couldn’t find Darren anymore to say goodbye. We had only talked 10 minutes at most.

  The girl and I walked over to the her apartment and we tried to talk a bit. No need: we were banging within minutes of entering her apartment. She was average-looking but had a good body. The sex wasn’t even that good, and when we went for a second round she was even on the phone with her girlfriend while riding me. I grabbed the phone out of her hand, threw it of the bed and told her to stopping messing around with it. She had been texting with her friend before when I was taking her from behind. I didn’t like her at all but I fucked away all the frustration I’d built up over the last week feeling sorry for myself. Skywalker was back in business again, Return of the Jedi!! Argentinean flag captured!

  I slept over and we said goodbye in the morning and exchanged phone numbers but we both knew it was just a formality. She knew I was not going to call her again.

  Everyone was having breakfast in the hostel kitchen when I returned and Larry looked up when I came in with a big grin on my face. I fistbumped Larry and he knew enough and so did the others. I was fired up and full of energy. I worked on the website that day and Larry, who did something in software for a social network company, helped me out. Till this day I don’t know what exactly happened in my mind but after meeting Darren and hate-fucking that girl, I became nearly fearless in nightly club game. My theory is that because I was kind of a mentor of Darren in Indonesia and taught him a lot about girls there, I just couldn’t bear to face the shame of failing in front of him. Well, whatever it was, it worked and I was going to take as much advantage of it as possible.

  I went out most nights during the week to a place called Maria Maria. It was a good place to go, with a live band on most days and always enough girls. It was a twenty-minute walk away from my hostel and it saved me on cab fare every night. I got shot down by a lot of girls that week, probably for being too fanatic, but I didn’t care about it. I went on with the plowing and was convinced I would get another bang soon.

  The hostel were I was staying was great. It’s called the Baluch Backpackers Hostel, and it’s pretty well-known. It has everything you needed to have a good time. It’s small, so it’s very easy to make contacts with others. There are weekly asados (barbeques) where you can eat as much steak as you want for forty pesos, about ten dollars. Argentina was living up to its name as the country with the best steaks in the world. The friendly owner noticed I was a big eater and didn’t stop throwing big, juicy, four-centimeter thick steaks on my plate. Wine is included in the price. I normally don’t promote places but this one I can really recommend it if you want to have a great time in Cordoba.

  I went out at least three times during the week to Maria Maria, and on the weekend to a club close by Cordoba’s main square, called Studio Theater. I did loads of approaches but had trouble with the language barrier. I was so fired up that I would approach every girl no matter how much she was out of my league. I walked up to them and started talking, girls would ask how long I’d been travelling and saying almost two years always made one hell of an impression.

  Anyway, one night I met three Brazilian girls who studied in Cordoba, chatted a bit with them and walked back to the apartment they were staying. Two of them walked straight upstairs and I was left behind with the girl I had been talking to for a while. This girl was smoking hot. She had a nice light brown skin, beautiful straight hair, a nice pair of perky tits and a nice big round booty. Her lips were big and sexy and she had a lip piercing. I kissed her and felt that her lips were super soft, I couldn’t stop holding and kissing her, she wanted to take it slow a bit but I grabbed that big booty with both hands. She pulled away my hands but five seconds later I would put them back there. You have to be persistent sometimes. Those big soft lips just kept me busy and it was the best kissing I had ever done up until then. Another Brazilian girl would take over her position as world’s best kisser a few months later.

  We met up again the next day and I ran the best game I could, but now that she was sober she wouldn’t kiss me anymore and confessed that she’d had an Argentinean boyfriend for a week. We met up once more that week to eat an ice cream and I tried again, but no success. I dreamed about her big soft lips around my dick that night.

  Cordoba is Argentina’s second largest city and a nice place to walk around. It was also the city where I’ve seen the most breastfeeding ever; you couldn’t walk down the street without seeing a mother with a boob hanging out. It surprised me because I not noticed this in other Argentinean cities so far.

  The ice cream in Argentina is very cheap and tastes amazing; I took several girls from the hostel to get an ice cream during the day and was fine-tuning my game this way. Backpacker girls were still on the bottom of my bang list but sometimes a cute girl came by and I tried to get a flag. I loved walking around in the city center during the day. There were lots of hotties around and great music came from every shop I passed. I had always liked reggeaton but now I started loving it. I also heard a new kind of music: the music of the poor people, known as Cumbia Villeria. There were a couple of other songs I liked and downloaded. I used them later to pick up girls.

  The weekly barbeques were great but for the rest of the week I was eating empanadas or chorizos on the street or heading over to Subway or McDonalds. Larry called me McDonalds’ biggest fan and advised to make a website about it. He’d left after a week in Cordoba because he was on a tight schedule for his trip. I went out alone a lot and actually started enjoying it. Before, I would just take about just anyone from a hostel to go out with, no matter how beta or how much of a passive cock-block it was. Now, I didn’t need the help.

  The Brazilian girl still contacted me on Facebook but wouldn’t go on a date with me because of her boyfriend. One night I ran into some of her friends, and since I was very drunk I tried to pick one of them up. It didn’t work and the next day I got an angry email from the hottie and she unfriended me. I couldn’t care less anymore. I knew that with my new-found powers I would ravish my way through South America. I planned to visit every country and capture every flag.

  One night I went home with a really hot girl, but she barely spoke any English. Her girlfriend did but she was picked up by an Argentinean guy, and once we were at her apartment we had to sleep on a lounge sofa. This girl was at least a seven and a half in looks but I had a hard time connecting with her since my Spanish was almost non–existent and so was her English. We made out a bit and both fell aslee
p spooning, knocked out by the booze. The famous Argentinean drink Fernet is an instant hangover, and I hated the stuff, but one of those girls brought me a half-liter of it mixed with Coca Cola. Mixed drinks are very strong in Argentinean clubs, it’s like ¾ booze and ¼ cola, and it’s relatively cheap too.

  When we woke up together the next morning we barely knew what had happened the night before. We exchanged numbers and said goodbye. She flaked on me a couple of times when I tried to set up a daytime date, but two weeks later she sent me a message. I didn’t reply to it. I had been celebrating my two-year anniversary of my trip with three German guys who were regulars in the hostel. The bottle of scotch I had bought for the occasion was already empty before we went out. I was very drunk that night and got an insane cold the day after. I stayed in bed for four days only watching movies all day instead of doing some writing to catch up with my website.

  I had been nearly a month in Cordoba and would stay a month more if I could but I had to move on. I took a bus to Mendoza and trouble started.

  Argentina – Mendoza

  By this time I was in love with Argentina. I liked everything: the music, the food, the people. Instead of staying a week in Cordoba I stayed nearly a month. Now it was time to hurry up again and just pay Mendoza a short visit.

  Since private rooms were still too expensive for my liking I stayed in another hostel. It looked like an OK place and the girls working there were OK-looking, but nothing special so far. I had been approaching like crazy in Cordoba but had only banged one girl and kissed a few others. Not results to go bragging about, but at least I conquered my fear to approach. It was all restricted to night game, though, and I had not been day-gaming at all. At night alcohol fueled my fearlessness but during the day the approach anxiety came back a little. Just walk up to a girl in the street? What the hell was I going to say to her? And what if she doesn’t speak any English? In a club you can just turn around and walk back to the bar and approach another girl, but in the street I was afraid to look like a fool. I thought about Rosario and the girls Larry and I had met when using the Couchsurfing website.