Crossroads of the Heart

by Savannah Maris

  “I think I’m ready to take that step.”

  I’m shocked by his reaction because he almost wrecks us. The kiss he gives me...

  “Tams, I want that so much, but only when you’re ready.” He kisses my forehead before he pulls away.

  I smile up at him. “If you win all of your events tonight, make sure you have a condom when we leave. I’m sure you can get one from one of the guys.”

  “Baby, I’ve had one since we started talking about this because I never knew when we’d round third base.” He winks at me.

  My face flushes. “If you win, I want it to be tonight. If you don’t, we wait until prom.”

  “Tamryn, that’s our whole senior year!”

  “There’s your motivation.” I coyly smile.

  “Fuck! That’s dirty and you know it.”

  I bite my bottom lip and nod.

  “Give me something of yours.”

  “What?”

  “My granddad used to say that when they rode for the love of a woman, the men wore something that belonged to her like a scarf or something.” He glances at me. “Tie your hair ribbon around my bicep.”

  My eyes dance with joy as I do as he’s requested.

  Noah

  I adjust myself as I drive.

  One event left. I’ve finished first in my two previous events. I coach myself to stay focused or the whole night will be ruined. Her ribbon is still on my bicep, and my confidence skyrockets when I find out which bull I’m riding. I’ve ridden Cyclone three times this year and stayed on him the full eight seconds each time. This night is no different. With the trophy in hand and the first dance out of the way, we’re free to leave whenever we want. Using the long drive back to Aiken as an excuse, we climb in my truck.

  My winnings are in the form of a check, and I don’t have much cash on me. We aren’t twenty-one, so getting a hotel room is out of the question, but I want this special for her, for us.

  We’re quiet for the first few miles out of town. I figure she’s just as nervous as I am. The road is dark and stretches on for what seems like forever. I hold her hand but don’t take my eyes off the road.

  “How would you like to make love under the stars?”

  “I think that’d be beautiful.”

  I find a field off the main road that has an open driveway around it. I follow it to where my truck can’t be seen from the road and put it in park before I kiss her. “Stay right here, baby. Let me put our picnic blanket and a couple jackets down in the bed.”

  She stays in the cab of the truck while I spread out the blanket. When I open the door and hold out my hand to help her down, she slips her shaking hand into mine.

  “Tams, we don’t have to do this tonight.”

  “I want to, but I’m just nervous. Sarah said it hurts like a bitch the first time.”

  “Baby, I sure it will, but I promise I’ll be as gentle as I can. This is the ultimate gift you can give me. I’ll make it good for you.”

  She nods, and I help her into the bed.

  “Tamryn, whether we do this tonight or not, I love you…always.”

  “I love you, too, Noah.”

  19

  Tamryn

  A tear rolls down my cheek. For the first time in almost a week, I feel the desire that I’ve only ever known with Noah. My core clenches, and I squeeze my legs together.

  “Tamryn, whether we do this tonight or not, I love you…always.”

  “I love you, too, Noah.”

  He pulls my tank top from my jeans and lifts it over my head as my gaze locks with his. With each new thing we do, I need eye contact, and he knows it. “Turn around, baby. Let me unfasten your bra.” His voice is gravelly.

  “Noah?”

  “It’s okay, Tams. It’s just you and me.”

  I slowly turn, and he quickly unfastens my bra and slips the straps down my arms. He kisses my shoulder and mumbles between kisses, “You are so beautiful.” Once the straps are gone, he holds my hips and turns me back to him.

  I lift his shirt over his head with shaking hands. “I’m sorry.”

  “Tams, we’ve done this part before. Why are you so nervous?”

  “I don’t know?”

  “We’ll stop whenever you want.”

  I nod as he unfastens my jeans. With his thumbs in the sides at my hips, he pulls my jeans and panties down at the same time. He helps me get my boots off even though he winces when he squats. As he stands back to his full height, he cups my face and kisses me thoroughly. His tongue claims my mouth then dances with mine.

  My hands are on the waist of his jeans, part on the denim and part on his hot skin. I pull back because we’re both panting. He’s shaking, too. “Baby, we don’t have to go all the way, but I’ve got to have some relief or I’m gonna come in my jeans. I really don’t wanna have to explain that to my mom.”

  I fumble to unfasten his jeans and take him out. I’ve seen him, felt him, and even tasted him, but tonight he seems bigger, harder. I sink to the pallet he’s made as he kicks off his boots and pushes his jeans the rest of the way down. He pulls out his wallet and sets it beside him. Looking at me, his lips tilt in a half smile.

  “Just in case.”

  I lie back and he rolls on top of me, kissing my mouth and neck until I moan. His hand cups my breast and plays with my nipple causing my legs to spread for him to settle between my thighs.

  “How are you feeling, baby?”

  “Like I do every time you touch me. Please touch me the way only you know how.”

  “Let me put the condom on because my dick keeps pulling me toward you, and I don’t want us to mess up.”

  “Please hurry.”

  I giggle now thinking about how long it took us to get the stupid package opened and the condom rolled on.

  He touches me, and I’m soaking wet. “Relax, okay. Think about how good it feels with my fingers inside of you.”

  I do as he plays with my clit then slips a finger inside, then another. I moan when his fingers leave my body, and he slips his cock to the edge of my opening. My eyes widen when he begins to push in.

  “Noah…”

  “Shh, bite my shoulder if you need to.”

  He pushes in one more time and I feel the pain. I bite his shoulder to muffle the cry. It’s more than a pinch, but not as bad as Sarah made it out to be. He moves a few more times, and I release his shoulder.

  “Baby, are you okay?”

  “Yeah, it’s better now. Keep doing that because I feel the buildup starting.”

  “You feel incredible, so I don’t know how long I can last. I should’ve gotten you off first.”

  With each movement the pressure builds. “Oh, Noah…”

  “You’re tightening even more. Are you coming?”

  “Yesss.”

  Noah falls over the edge with me. It couldn’t have lasted more than two minutes from the time he enters me until we’re done.

  20

  Noah

  “You’re tightening even more. Are you coming?”

  “Yesss!”

  These days I don’t need to ask if she’s coming. I know her body, and her muscles still clamp down on me.

  I need to change my train of thought or I’m going to have permanent zipper marks on my dick because my jeans feel two sizes too small in the crotch at the moment.

  I hit Bash’s number.

  “Noah?”

  “Hey. Coverage is spotty here, where am I meeting you?”

  “There’s an old Antebellum house in downtown Saluda that’s been turned into a small inn. I’ve got two rooms reserved. I’ll text you the address.”

  “Thanks. Anything new happen?”

  “The silver truck didn’t leave until late morning, so either he’s unemployed or in business for himself.”

  “Good to know. The sign I just passed says I’m thirty miles out, so I should see you in about a half hour if I don’t get behind any tractors.”

  “Yeah, it’s nothing but farm land
out here. And the smell…”

  I chuckle. “What? You’re not used to the fragrance of nature?”

  “Hell no, give me the smells of the city. Rotting garbage is better than the odor of shit.”

  A bark of laughter leaves my body, and it feels good. “I’ll see you in a half hour, Bash.”

  A small smile spreads across my face. To keep from strangling my dick, I think about what my dad wants me to do. I’ll need to get some numbers from a real estate agent to see what a ranch would sell for. Does he sell it with the horses or just the land? I wonder if he’s already got a buyer in mind. Maybe he and the ranch foreman, Fred, have something already worked out. I’ll have a talk with my dad once everything is settled with Tamryn.

  Tamryn...

  What the hell am I going to do if she really wants to end our marriage?

  I roll down the windows in the truck to let in some air because the thought of losing her makes my head swim and stomach turn. With my right hand on the wheel, and my left elbow resting on the door, I pull on my bottom lip. I try to imagine my life without her in it, but I can’t. What I can imagine is her belly rounded with my child, but is she really ready to give up her career for a while? I know women who continue to model during and after pregnancy, but I don’t want Tamryn to while she’s pregnant. If she wants to go back later, we’ll work something out. I want her to have the world, however she sees that world, and I pray that I’m in her world.

  As the road stretches in front of me, conversations from the past week play in my mind.

  We’ve got her in a house with another man for an entire night.

  Who’s the man, Tams? Have you replaced me already?

  I’ve seen your wife, have you? Look at her, Noah. She’s gorgeous, sensual, and sexy as hell.

  Yes, I look at her every day, and I’ve taken that luxury for granted for the last time.

  The line to take your place will start quickly. Hell, if I wasn’t your friend I’d be the first damn person in it.

  You’ve made your point, Vince, or she’s made it for you because it seems the line has already started. Now, the question is, am I too late?

  I slow the truck as I come to a traffic light. While I’m stopped, I look at Bash’s text with the address. I remember the place so I drive right to it. Saluda hasn’t changed a lot thirteen years. Some revitalization has taken place, but that’s about it. It’s still predominately a farming community. I pull into the parking lot and see Bash sitting in a rocking chair on the front porch. He comes to meet me at my truck as I open the door. “Find out anything on the guy yet?”

  “He’s local, won the same rodeo as you, that’s about it. I don’t have connections here to run his tags at the DMV like I do in Atlanta.”

  “I haven’t heard back from her attorney about talking with her. I need to see her. Where is she?”

  “As far as I know, still at that house.”

  “Whose house is it?”

  Bash shrugs. “I don’t know. If you haven’t noticed, we’re in a small town. Townspeople are tight lipped if you start asking a lot of questions. I found out what I got from the bartender because it happened right in front of me, and I didn’t ask who they were.”

  “Yeah, the thing is, I’m not that patient.”

  “Lucky for you, she seems to hang out at a place called The Crossroads Bar and Grill.”

  I shake my head and take a deep breath. “How appropriate. I guess I know where we’ll be tonight.”

  “Let me show up first. I’ll text you when I see her, then you can come by. We don’t want to show our cards until we need to.”

  I narrow my eyes and level Bash with a menacing look. “That will be tomorrow morning at the latest. If I don’t hear from her attorney today with a time for a breakfast meeting, then I will be in his office as soon as the doors open.”

  “Got it.” Bash looks at his watch. “Why don’t you take a shower and relax for a couple of hours? You don’t want to be uptight when you walk in the bar.”

  21

  Tamryn

  I walk back inside when the sun starts to set. My phone is on the kitchen counter with the message light is flashing, so I pick it up to see two new messages. The first one is from my mother.

  “Hey, honey. I didn’t know if you were watching TV, but it’s on the news that Noah filed a missing person’s report on you yesterday. Tamryn, are you all right? We’ve received a few calls from people wanting to interview us. We’ve turned the phone off, so only call our cell phones. Please call me and let us know you’re safe.”

  I roll her eyes. Noah, what have you done? I can’t believe he’d involve the police. I’ll deal with my mother later. I take a calming breath while the next voice message plays.

  “Mrs. Carmichael, I wanted you to know that the divorce papers were served on Mr. Carmichael this morning. He’s called and wants me to tell you that he’s on his way to Saluda. He won’t sign any papers until you two can talk privately, and he requests a breakfast meeting in the morning. Call me back to confirm you’ll take the meeting and a time. I told him that I didn’t think you would, and if you did I’d want to be present. You have my cell number.”

  My hand flies to my heart, and I fist my shirt as I sink to the floor. He wants breakfast with me. I don’t know if I can do this if I see him. Why would he come here? He has someone else. Why didn’t he just sign the papers and mail them back? I plow my fingers into my hair and rest my elbows on my knees as tears flow down my face. My mind races with what to do. What does he want? Should I meet with him? My fingers tremble as I call Mr. Lee.

  “Mrs. Carmichael?”

  “Good evening, Mr. Lee. I received your message.”

  “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

  “Probably not, but I’ll meet him. Where’s a good, quiet restaurant in town?”

  “They have a nice breakfast menu at the inn over on Main Street. It’s quiet, and during the week there won’t be many people there. What time would you like us to meet him?”

  “I’ll meet him at nine.”

  “Mrs. Carmichael, I don’t think you should meet him alone.”

  “I understand that, Mr. Lee, but I don’t want to waste your time if it turns out to be nothing.”

  “I don’t agree with it, but I’ll let him know.”

  “Thank you. I’ll call you once the meeting is over.”

  I disconnect that call and return my mother’s.

  “Tamryn?”

  “Mom, I’m sorry Noah’s done that. I had no idea he’d involve the police.”

  “Honey, what did you think he’d do when he couldn’t find you? It’s the only logical thing he could’ve done, especially with your job being so public. What if you’d been taken?”

  I blow out an exasperated breath. “I didn’t think of that.” I pause. “Listen, Mom, seems I’ll be meeting with Noah in the morning, so no need to worry. Just don’t talk to anyone, okay?”

  “You’re going home?”

  “No, ma’am. Apparently, Noah’s coming here.”

  “Oh, that’s wonderful. I’m glad y’all are going to talk this through.”

  “I’m not making any promises, Mom. We’re talking, that’s it.”

  “I know, baby girl. Call me tomorrow and let me know how things went.”

  “Yes, ma’am. Good night.”

  My mother’s words from every time Noah and I had an argument come back to me. You don’t need to wear your feelings on your sleeve, Tamryn. You pull yourself together—get dressed, put on your makeup, and fix your hair. Make him sweat. My mother would have been appalled if she had seen me last night, so I stand up straight and hold my head high. If Noah is going to be here in the morning, I’m going to enjoy tonight. With renewed determination, I go about getting dressed for the evening.

  After my shower, I pull my favorite form-fitting red dress out of my closet. It’s Noah’s favorite too. What would he think if he saw me wearing it without him? If he can come home with another woman
’s lipstick on his collar and perfume on his clothes, then I can do the same. What was that old saying, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander? Maybe it’s time Noah experiences my side of the coin.

  I curl my hair into long beach waves, my makeup is subtle except for the red lipstick, and the only pair of earrings I brought with me. The dress has a built-in bra, so the only other garments I need are my red satin G-string and matching red heels. Tonight, I’m making a statement by dressing how I’d dress in Atlanta, not by trying to fit in here.

  I’m taking one last look in the mirror when the doorbell rings. I grab my clutch, throw my keys in it, and open the door.

  “Holy shit!” Colt’s eyes rake over me. “Tamryn, you’re stunning!”

  I turn completely around to give him a full view.

  “You’re really going to stand out tonight.” His brows furrow.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I really didn’t want to get into a fight. I think I’m going to need Dale’s baseball bat from behind the bar.”

  I shake my head. “I doubt that. No one bothers me as long as I’m with you.” I smile as I push the screen door open and walk through it.

  Colt holds the door while I lock the main one. “I can feel your eyes on my ass.”

  “In that dress, I don’t know where to look first…or last. It’s going to be hard to drive because I don’t want to take my eyes off you.”

  I look over my shoulder and tentatively smile.

  Colt walks me to the passenger side of the truck and opens the door. He runs a hand over his head then around the back of his neck. “Um, how are we going to get you in the truck? I mean, I can lift you, but,” he lifts his hands and looks at them, “my hands will be on your ass.” His eyes roll from his hands up to my eyes.

  I smile. “Bridal style. You know, sideways in a cradle position?”

  “Yeah, gotcha.” He bends his knees and lifts me into the truck. I can feel his heart racing, and I can’t remember the last time Noah had this kind of reaction to me.