Heart Trouble

by Jae

  Thighs locked and breasts brushing, they strained against each other.

  Hope grasped her shoulders, urged her up a little, and kissed her hard.

  Laleh matched her thrust for thrust. Every nerve ending in her body seemed to come alive as they rocked against each other in a perfect rhythm. It took her arousal-clouded brain a few moments to understand that this would be over very soon if she didn’t slow them down.

  She tore her lips from Hope’s and slid to the side.

  “No,” Hope groaned out. “What are you—?”

  Her protest ended on a deep moan as Laleh trailed her hand down her belly. She got lost in the softness of Hope’s skin at the bend of her leg for several seconds but then leaned up on one elbow and looked down into Hope’s flushed face, hoping the emotions written there would guide her. Carefully, she let her fingers play through Hope’s wiry curls. The wetness on her fingertips excited her.

  Hope drew in a quivering breath. “Oh God, what you’re doing to me…”

  Laleh traced the swollen folds and then experimentally grazed Hope’s clitoris with one finger.

  Hope’s hips surged upward. “Don’t tease.”

  “I’m not teasing.” Laleh meant it. “I’m finding out what you like. What I like. Is that okay?”

  “It’s killing me…but in the best of ways.” Restlessly, she trailed her hands up and down Laleh’s sweat-slicked back.

  Laleh gazed into her eyes as she slowly moved her hand, thrilled at the way Hope arched up against her, seeking more contact. Hope’s breathing turned ragged, and Laleh was panting too.

  She inched her fingertips closer to Hope’s opening and then hesitated. “Do you want me to…?”

  Hope moaned out her reply.

  Slowly, Laleh eased inside of her with one finger. She watched as Hope clawed at the rumpled sheets and threw her head back, face tilted to the ceiling. Her own breath hitched at the beautiful sight and the intimacy of being inside of her.

  Hope bucked her hips against her. She panted, her mouth slightly open and her cheeks flushed. Beads of sweat ran down the side of her straining belly.

  Laleh’s head spun. She couldn’t believe how incredible this was. Overcome, she slid closer, halfway on top of Hope, and covered her face with kisses.

  A long moan tore from Hope as the weight of Laleh’s body drove her finger deeper. “Do that again!”

  “This?” Laleh tried to replicate the movement.

  “Yes! More!” Hope surged up against her and kissed her as Laleh eased out and back in with a second finger. She let go of the sheet and dug her nails into Laleh’s shoulders.

  Their rocking motion sent jolts of pleasure through Laleh as Hope’s firm thigh rubbed against her. Seeing Hope lose all control was intoxicating. “I love being with you…in you like this.” It was getting hard to keep her own need in check. She surged against Hope, the tiny, almost painful sensation of Hope’s fingernails on her back driving her into overload. She pressed her mouth to the pounding pulse in Hope’s neck and panted against her damp skin.

  Tremors started to shake Hope’s thighs. “Laleh…”

  Laleh tore her lips away from Hope’s neck, wanting to watch her. With a small, guttural sound from deep in her throat, she moved against Hope once, twice more and then felt her fingers being gripped.

  Hope arched against her and came with a shout, her hands grabbing Laleh’s ass and pulling her tight against her leg.

  Laleh’s mind went blank as her own climax washed over her, and she followed Hope over the brink.

  When her brain started functioning again, Hope’s chest was still heaving beneath her cheek. “God, that… Laleh.” Her warm breath brushed over Laleh’s forehead.

  “Yeah.” She pressed little kisses to Hope’s shoulder and slowly, a little regretfully withdrew her fingers. “That was amazing. You were amazing.”

  “Me?”

  Laleh kissed the damp skin between her breasts. “Okay, we. We were amazing. Together. It seems my worry about it not being as good without the link was unfounded.”

  “Completely unfounded.” Hope combed tangled strands of hair back behind Laleh’s ears and gazed up at her with such love that Laleh nearly melted. “That is…”

  About to press another kiss to Hope’s chest, Laleh froze. “What?”

  “Well, you know I’m a scientist. We’re always after repeatable results. Otherwise, how do we know this wasn’t a fluke?”

  Laleh grinned down at her. It was getting late, and she had to work the next day, but right now, she couldn’t care less. “Hm. Maybe you’re right. We should make sure.”

  “Yeah. But this time…” Hope wrapped her arms around her and rolled them around. “…I get to be on top.”

  Laleh laughed. “Whatever you want.”

  “Whatever I want?” Hope repeated with heat in her eyes.

  In reply, Laleh pulled her down and kissed her, effectively ending the conversation.

  * * *

  Laleh had probably headed straight to Hope’s after work, so she still smelled of her aunt’s Persian cooking when she stepped into the condo.

  Hope closed the door and pulled her close for a moment, savoring the way it felt to hold her after two days of not seeing each other. She pressed a kiss to Laleh’s warm neck and deeply breathed in her scent. Come on. Say it.

  It had been three weeks since their connection had vanished. At times, it still took a conscious effort to communicate verbally, but they were getting better at it.

  Hope gave herself a mental kick. “I…I missed you.”

  Laleh lifted her face and kissed her, leaving no doubt about her feelings. “I missed you too.” Then her lips were on Hope’s again.

  Their tongues slid along each other’s, stroking languidly, and their bodies pressed together. At moments like this, they were so much in sync that it was almost as if their minds were still connected. Sometimes, Hope thought that traces of their link might have remained, but maybe it was just that she had opened herself up to Laleh in ways that she had never done with any other woman.

  When they broke the kiss after several minutes, Laleh lifted her nose into the air and sniffed like a cute little dog. “Are you…cooking?”

  “Don’t sound so incredulous.” Hope lightly pinched her sexy ass. “I even made you fesenjan. I know it won’t be anything like yours, but—”

  Another passionate kiss interrupted her. Laleh slid her fingers into Hope’s hair. “Did I tell you that you’re the best girlfriend ever?”

  Hope grinned at her. “Well, that’s not exactly hard, is it? Since I’m your first girlfriend.”

  Laleh trailed her fingertips down the back of Hope’s neck, making her shiver. “The first and the last. You’ve spoiled me for anyone else.”

  The implied promise soothed Hope’s fears of ever losing Laleh.

  They stared into each other’s eyes until Hope remembered the food she was keeping warm in the oven. She took Laleh’s hand, led her to the table, and pulled a chair out for her. Once Laleh was seated, she pressed a light kiss to the top of her head before getting their plates from the kitchen.

  “I hope I got it right,” she said as she slid one of the plates in front of Laleh. “Without our connection, making fesenjan was much harder than expected.”

  Laleh studied her across the table. “Do you still miss it?”

  She didn’t have to explain what it meant. With anyone else, Hope would have pretended to be fine, but she had promised herself not to fake it with Laleh. Biting her lip, she stared at her plate. “A little.”

  Laleh slid a hand onto hers and squeezed. “Me too. It’s weird, isn’t it? Like there’s some kind of…void…or a missing limb or something.”

  Hope nodded.

  “But now the phantom limb pain is slowly fading. At least for me.” Laleh rubbed her thumb across the back of Hope’s hand. “How is it for you?”

  Hope thought about it. Was it getting any easier? “I think it is. Getting easier, I mean. Mayb
e losing our connection was a good thing. I realized I relied on it too much. Now I have to talk to you and actually tell you how I feel.”

  “I love it when you do.” Laleh lifted Hope’s hand to her mouth and kissed her knuckles.

  Heat spread from her fingers through the rest of her body. They looked into each other’s eyes, and Hope was tempted to forget about dinner and drag Laleh to the bedroom instead.

  Laleh chuckled. “I don’t need our connection to know what’s on your mind.”

  “Any objections?” Hope asked.

  “None at all.” Laleh’s dark eyes now looked black with passion, and it was wonderful to be reassured that the spark between them was still there. It hadn’t been there solely because of their link. She cleared her throat. “But let’s eat first. You put so much hard work into this, so I don’t want your delicious food to get cold.”

  “Let’s hope it is delicious,” Hope said. “I, um, had to start over twice because I roasted the walnuts for too long and they turned bitter. The third time, I didn’t dare taste-test because I knew I was out of time…and out of walnuts.”

  “I’m sure it’s great.”

  And Hope was just as sure that Laleh would say so even if it were the worst thing she’d eaten in her entire life.

  Carefully, Laleh took a bit of rice on her fork and tried the dish. She chewed slowly, and just when Hope thought she’d go for her water glass, she took a second, bigger forkful. “It’s fantastic.”

  Hope blew out a breath and only then reached for her own fork. Indeed, her third attempt at fesenjan wasn’t too bad.

  They ate while talking about their days and then worked together to rinse the dishes, making Hope smile about how normal it all was. Maybe she wasn’t so bad at this relationship thing after all.

  After closing the dishwasher, Laleh gave her a hug and kissed her. “Thank you for dinner.”

  They stood in the middle of the kitchen and exchanged kisses for a while.

  “Can you stay over tonight?” Hope asked, her voice husky.

  Laleh smiled. “See? You’re getting better at asking.”

  Hope returned the smile. “I have a great motivation. So, can you stay?”

  Instead of replying verbally, Laleh took her hand and pulled her toward the bedroom.

  CHAPTER 27

  As the moment of spring equinox approached, Laleh watched as her family gathered around the Haft Sin table, where the seven items representing different aspects of life were displayed. Her brothers were holding hands with their wives, and even her youngest cousin had brought her boyfriend to celebrate Nowruz with them.

  “Why didn’t you bring your boyfriend, Laleh joon?” one of her mother’s friends asked.

  Laleh turned to Mrs. Hajimiri. “I don’t have a boyfriend,” she said for the dozenth time that evening. Why did everyone and their dog keep asking her about a boyfriend, as if her worth was measured by her relationship status?

  “What a pity.” Mrs. Hajimiri made a clucking sound. “Well, maybe you’ll find someone in the new year.”

  Several of Laleh’s female relatives nodded their heads and added well-meaning advice on how to attract a suitor.

  Laleh bit her tongue. How she would have loved to tell them that she had already found the love of her life. The thought made her pause. But it was true. She had feared that her feelings would fade if they ever lost their empathetic connection, but they had grown even stronger in the month since Valentine’s Day weekend. More than ever before, she felt that Hope was the person she wanted to share her life with. She would have liked nothing better than to celebrate the Persian New Year with her and introduce her to the Nowruz traditions. But that was out of the question.

  Or was it? With every day that went by, she hated it more that she had to keep her relationship a secret, as if she were ashamed of Hope.

  Her father turned down the volume on the Persian dance music and waved his arms, nearly knocking the goldfish bowl off the Haft Sin table. “Just one more minute, everyone!”

  Laleh glanced at her watch. It was nearly three thirty in the morning. Was it a busy night shift for Hope, or had she managed to get enough of a break to eat the food Laleh had sent to work with her?

  “Nowruz mobarak,” her relatives started shouting all around her and descended on her for hugs and kisses.

  Her father engulfed her in his arms. “Happy New Year, joon-am.”

  “Happy New Year, Baba.”

  He pressed a gift-wrapped present into her hands and beamed with pride. “Open it.”

  “I’m not a child anymore.” Laleh pointed at her niece and her cousins’ kids, who received coins and small gifts from the older family members.

  Her father waved her protest away. “You’re never too old for presents.”

  Well, Laleh had always loved gifts, so she slid her index finger beneath the roll of tape he had used and opened the present. The paper fell away, and she wasn’t surprised to hold a book of Persian poetry in her hands. “Thank you, Baba. I will honor it.” She slid her fingertips over the beautiful cover and opened the book at a random page.

  It held a quote by Rumi, her father’s favorite poet.

  Your heart knows the way. Run in that direction.

  She stared down at the almost eight-hundred-year-old wisdom. Her heart had indeed pointed her in the right direction—it had brought her into the emergency room, where she had met Hope.

  “Don’t you like it?” her father asked, his gaze going back and forth between her face and the book.

  “I love it,” Laleh said, her voice thick with emotion. “Really.”

  “But?”

  Laleh hesitated. Her cell phone rang, making her jump. Saved by the bell. “Do you mind?” She held up the ringing phone.

  “Go ahead. It’s probably that secret boyfriend of yours.”

  “What? No. I don’t have a secret boyfriend.”

  “Of course you don’t.” Her father winked and walked away.

  Groaning, Laleh glanced at the screen. Hope! She quickly accepted the call.

  “Nowruz mobarak,” Hope said. Her pronunciation wasn’t as good as it had been when their minds had been connected, but she had clearly practiced so she could wish Laleh a happy New Year.

  It meant a lot to Laleh. “Thank you. Happy New Year to you too.” She walked over to the kitchen, away from her loud family. “You sound tired.”

  “A little,” Hope said, just when Laleh thought she would answer with an I’m okay.

  Laleh smiled and peered into the pot on the stove to see if there was any tahdig left over. “You’ve gotten better at not faking it.” She sighed and lowered her voice. “Unlike me. I’m lying to my family left and right. They keep asking me about my boyfriend.”

  “Don’t beat yourself up. I know this is hard for you. You’ll tell them when the time is right.”

  Would it ever be right? Laleh was beginning to doubt it.

  Someone called Hope’s name in the background. “Be right there,” Hope answered. Then, more softly, she said, “I have to go. Enjoy the celebration.”

  “Thanks. And you call me when you get off shift.”

  “Will do. And Laleh?”

  “Yes?”

  “I love you.”

  Laleh still melted inside whenever she heard those words from Hope. With a big smile, she answered, “I love you too.” She ended the call and put her phone away.

  A sound—something like a gasp—made her look up.

  Her mother stood in the doorway. Her wide-eyed stare made it clear that she had heard what Laleh had said on the phone. “I knew it! You do have a boyfriend!”

  “No! Maman, I… It’s not what you think.”

  Her mother smiled knowingly. “Oh, you don’t fool me even for a second. I know you. Don’t you think I noticed how happy you’ve been for the last few weeks? You’re in love!”

  Laleh couldn’t deny it. She didn’t want to deny it.

  Three long steps and her mother stood next to her.
She nudged Laleh. “Tell me about him. I want to hear every little thing.”

  Laleh squirmed. “I will tell you everything. But not right now, with so many people around.” She peered past her mother into the living room, where all of her relatives and her parents’ friends were dancing and laughing.

  Her mother put her hands on her hips. “What kind of nonsense is this? Don’t you think they all want to hear the good news?”

  “I’m not so sure they’d consider it good news,” Laleh mumbled, almost too low for her mother to hear.

  Her mother seemed to have heard it anyway. She pressed a hand to her chest and swayed. “You didn’t do something stupid like elope and get married without us, did you?”

  “No. Nothing like that.”

  One hand still pressed to her chest, her mother took several deep breaths. “Then what’s going on? Laleh joon, please. Will you finally tell me? You’re starting to scare me. He’s not in prison, is he?”

  “No.” Laleh clutched the book of poetry with both hands. She knew she had a choice to make: keep lying to her family or tell the truth—with all its consequences. She was scared to death of her family’s reaction, but she didn’t want to violate Hope’s trust by constantly denying her and their relationship.

  Her father entered the kitchen. “What are you doing in here? Come to the living room and celebrate with us!”

  Oh, great. But at least she wouldn’t have to say it twice. She wasn’t even sure she could say it this once.

  “We will in a second. But first Laleh wants to tell us something,” her mother announced. “She’s got a boyfriend!”

  Laleh’s heart started racing. For once, she was glad her mind and Hope’s were no longer connected. If Hope had sensed her emotions, she would have panicked and rushed over.

  She held on to the book for dear life, as if it were a shield that could protect her. Her fingers were clammy. She had no idea how to tell them, so she said the first thing that came to mind. “Remember how you always tried to set me up with a doctor or a lawyer?”

  Her mother nodded. “You need a man who’s intelligent and can—”