Seizing Control

by Kylie Hillman

Ignoring my ongoing objections to his intended intrusion.

  “No, Brendan. Please don't do this,” I beg.

  Every girl’s worst nightmare is about to happen to me if I don't find a way to make him stop.

  I don't have it in me to just lie there and let him violate me—like he wants me to—so I fight him with everything I have. I squirm and struggle, punch and kick, bite and scratch at any part of his body that I can reach, aiming especially for his sensitive parts. I manage to gain some space but he yanks me back down by my hips and slaps me across the face. He grabs my hair and pulls my head back, using the pain in my scalp to control me. Then with his free hand he guides himself back between my legs. I try to push them together but he spreads them wider with his hips and slams his cock into me.

  “Oh...It hurts...Stop! Please…” I cry out loudly, writhing to dislodge him.

  My core burns from the friction caused by his unwanted entry and I feel nothing but pain as he pushes harder so he can lodge himself fully within me. I’m not wet at all, so the burning quickly becomes excruciating. This feels nothing like it did with Mik. Brendan holds completely still inside of me and I can feel his excited breath against my neck, before he starts kissing his way up to my mouth.

  “You feel so good, Lainey. So tight you hurt me. You’re so warm and snug and I love that I'm the only man to have ever been inside you.”

  I know it's wrong but I take comfort in the fact that I let Mik make love to me tonight. Brendan might think otherwise but he hasn't stolen my virginity and I'll be eternally thankful that I got to give it willingly to the man I love.

  “I’m gonna make you scream my name until it’s the only one you can remember. You’re mine can’t you feel it?” He continues, groaning when he flexes his hips against me as he says the last sentence. I can definitely feel it, just like he wants me to. His words break my heart and tears spill out over my cheeks and down my face. I can’t believe he’s doing this. Why didn’t I just dump him in front of everyone or let Dad take care of it for me? I should have listened to Mik and stayed at the party.

  All the things I should have done differently tonight go around in circles in my head.

  “Don’t cry, baby girl. This what we should have been doing all along. I let you think you had control of our relationship for too long. You started thinking that you’re better than you are. Look at you, you’re nothing special. You should be thankful I invest my time in you. I could do so much better.”

  He shakes his head and chuckles, maintaining his mid-tempo thrusting. “You’re my slut. My whore. You think your biker is going to want you once I’m finished with you? No one will want you.”

  He looks me in the eyes as he degrades me with his body and his words, and I realize he’s completely insane right at this moment. My heart starts pounding harder in fear and the world closes in, as if I’m about to blackout. I close my eyes tight so I don't have to see his vile face. My mind keeps screaming for Mik, my Dad, Benji, someone, anyone to please come and save me.

  To make him stop.

  Brendan thrusts within me for a few minutes, keeping control of me with my hair and his body weight when I continue fighting, before he pulls all the way out. The pain lessens immediately and I open my eyes hoping this is over.

  “That was the nice bit. I let you have it since it’s your first time, not that you deserved it after your behaviour tonight. I hope you enjoyed it because now I'm going to punish you for humiliating me.”

  Before I have time to grasp what he is saying, he lines up his cock with my entrance and slams back into me with so much power that my body is forced up the tray of the truck. Pulling me back to him, he methodically slams into me over and over again, holding me firmly in place with one hand clasping my wrists together and the other curled under my shoulder so the intensity of his thrusting isn't lessened by my ability to move away from him. He continues until I feel nothing but pain throughout my whole body. Every good feeling that Mik gave me earlier tonight is gone, replaced with sheer agony. I feel like I’m being ripped apart from the inside.

  “Scream for me, Lainey, my beautiful slut,” he chants as he thrusts.

  “My whore, scream as loud as you can.”

  He laughs at my futile attempts to get away from him. Furthering my devastation, he leans down every now and then to lick the tears from my face.

  I hold out as long as I can but eventually I can’t take anymore. I start screaming over and over. He smiles at me devilishly when he realizes he has broken me and then lets my wrists go, curling his other arm around my previously free shoulder. My arms hang limply and I just lie here— body, mind and spirit shattered—as his hard thrusts gain speed and intensity. He assaults my mouth and my neck with his tongue and teeth while he moves within me. He drives himself to his release and I hear him groaning as he fills me with his hot ejaculation. I numbly realize that he didn’t wear a condom.

  “I love you, Lainey. You’re mine and only mine,” he moans as he finishes.

  He rolls off me and drops onto his back. I lie still next to him, trying to get my breath back, trying to pick up the broken pieces of my spirit. I can’t grasp what just happened. My entire body aches, my heart fragmented.

  How did something like this happen to me? I’m tough and I know how to look after myself. I have a powerful, scary father and strong brothers to protect me. I’m guarded by a Motorcycle Club and he still managed to do this to me. I really am nothing special if none of that can keep me safe. I struggle to sit up, my insides throbbing and as I do his semen starts dripping out of me, adding insult to injury.

  “Going somewhere, Lainey?” he asks when I move. I fall still instantly, hugging myself for the comfort I need right now. With my arms wrapped around my legs I start rocking. Brendan pushes himself upright and wraps his arms around me, acting as if we just shared a special moment. My body tenses further, bracing for him to hurt me again. Instead he kisses my forehead tenderly.

  “I’m spent, my darling girl. I’m going to head inside. Why don’t you go home and I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon,” he tells me this as if we just made love, as if he didn't just rape me.

  He starts putting his clothes back on so I close my bra and pull my ripped shirt around me. I find my jeans and pull them on before I gather my boots and climb out of the back tray of his truck.

  Grabbing my bag from the front of his vehicle, I run on shaky legs and sock clad feet to my car. I don't know how my legs are managing to hold me upright but I’m grateful that they are still working.

  Just as I am pulling my door shut, he calls after me, “Remember that I love you, Lainey and we’re staying together no matter what you choose. You aren't going to like what happens if you forget that. Think about Benji, think about Lachie, think about everyone you love and imagine what I can do to them.”

  I can't stomach listening to him anymore so I ignore his evil words and concentrate on getting away from him. My head is spinning, my body is shaking, and my eyesight is fading in and out as I gun the engine of my car and drive away from Brendan as fast as I can.

  Exceeding the speed limit dramatically, I drive into town and straight past my birthday party which is still in full swing. I come to an abrupt, skidding stop at the Motel when I see Mik’s vehicle parked out the front. The light is on in his room. He must have left the party shortly after Brendan and I did.

  I want nothing more than to run to Mik but Brendan’s words echo through my head. I don't know if he is going to love me as much if he finds out what happened. How used and disgusting I am now. Will telling him keep me safe and end this nightmare or will Brendan win and hurt everyone I care about? Mik is tough, he’s strong and he’s deadly, but Brendan has proven tonight that he is evil. I don't think I can take the risk. It has to be better for me to keep quiet until I can fix the problem I created, than for everyone I love to get hurt because of me?

  And the pictures he says he has of Benji? I highly doubt he is lying. Exposing my twin’s drug use would wrec
k his dream career before it’s even begun. He’s already finding it hard to get teams to take him seriously because our father is a member of a ‘Outlaw’ Motorcycle Club so drug use would be the final straw. As each problem spins around my mind, I decide it’s too risky to tell anyone I love what happened tonight so I pull back on to the highway and drive out the other side of town towards my home.

  Parking in my usual spot in our five car garage, I gather my things and, without bothering to turn on the lights or shut the front door behind me, I run through my deserted home. I sprint into the bathroom I share with my brothers and lock myself in there. Dropping my stuff to the floor, I turn the shower onto the hottest temperature setting. I need to remove Brendan's touch from my body.

  As I’m stripping off, I hear my phone beep in rapid succession. Pulling it out of my handbag I find multiple text messages from Brendan and one from Mik. I open the texts from Brendan and numerous pictures and videos of Benji smoking a glass pipe and snorting white lines of powder appear before my eyes. He looks off of his head and completely unaware he is being photographed.

  I scroll through them. Each one is worse than the one before. How did I miss the signs?

  BRENDAN: There’s more where they came from. Thanks for a great night. Happy birthday, Lainey.

  Not wanting to stare at his evil messages any longer, I jab the screen to close the pictures. I read Mik’s text.

  MIK: Text me when you’re free. Come spend the night with me in my room, I can’t wait until tomorrow to see you. I'll wait up. Love you xx

  My heart breaks, and I stumble into the shower with tears streaming down my face. I slide to the floor and let the water rush over me. The water is scalding but I can’t feel it.

  I am numb.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Mik

  Present Day

  “Yeah, cheers,” I tell the asshole who had Lainey’s phone.

  It’s taking everything I have to resist the urge to drive my fist through his fucking face. He shuts the door without replying and I hear him arming an alarm system. Fucking pussy!

  I’m certain he knows where Lainey is. I’d almost put money on her being in that house just like her phone indicated. His story about finding it near the playground has too many holes. She hasn't been near the playground in the entire four years we've lived near it. Plus I've been calling her phone non-stop since I got home and realized she was missing, and he never answered me. He didn't find it where he said and he had no plans of finding its owner.

  Flipping it over when he handed it to me revealed that the seal I’d put on the bottom of the battery cover was broken. Some asshole has pulled her phone apart and my guess is they were looking for GPS. Thank fuck, I’d had Kyle install an app that couldn’t be detected until after it was accessed just in case of this exact scenario.

  Scrolling through her phone as I jog back to our place, I discover that my missed calls and texts have also been opened. The dickhead is full of shit.

  In our immediate vicinity, I know every house and their occupants and there isn’t a dog at his address. I have Kyle run checks routinely on our neighbours and anyone who Lainey comes into regular contact with. Little fucker rolls his eyes when I ask because he thinks I'm paranoid, but he runs them anyway. The dead look that Lainey had in her eyes after that shit with her ex went down still haunts me in my nightmares. It drives my need to do whatever it takes to keep my woman safe. I couldn't handle seeing her like that again.

  Nothing adds up and it’s setting my bullshit detector off something chronic.

  Even though every muscle in my body wants me to break the fucking door down and rip that house apart looking for her, I force myself to keep walking away. If my woman is in there then I need to arrange my brothers as backup. I can't run the risk of getting her hurt by being hasty. None of our neighbours saw or heard a fucking thing when I canvassed, so her disappearance screams ‘professional job’ to me and that freaks me the fuck out!

  Jogging up the stairs to the front door of our house, I let myself in. Once inside, the smell of her perfume floods my senses, nearly making me breakdown. Her coffee cup and cereal bowl are still on the coffee table and the t-shirt of mine that she pulled on when she got out of bed is balled up on the couch from when we made love this morning.

  My balls tighten when I think about how I pounced on her when she was watching the morning news. We’d started on the couch and ended with her back plastered against the shower tiles and her long legs wrapped around me as I'd driven myself into her. There's no better way to start your day, in my humble opinion, than balls deep in your woman. Particularly when your woman's as beautiful as mine.

  I pick up my t-shirt and hold it to my nose, it smells like a perfect blend of mine and Lainey’s scents. A small laugh rumbles through my chest when I think about the amount of time I spend sniffing her things when she's not around. She’d fucking kill me if she caught me. My laughter is cut short when I remember that she isn't simply at work or out with her girls but missing—more than likely abducted.

  Throwing the t-shirt back on the couch as I stalk into the open concept kitchen, I slam my fist down on our solid oak dining table and throw myself into one of the dining chairs.

  My gut tells me that none of this is a coincidence and the date points everything straight back to Brendan fucking Taylor. If it is him, I am going to kill him this time. I should have killed him when I found out that he had been blackmailing and hurting Lainey four years ago but I’d held myself in check because she needed me and I was no fucking good to her in jail. Once the cops were involved, I was limited in what I could do to him without doing time for it. Going to jail didn’t scare me but leaving Lainey alone to deal with what he’d put her through fucking did.

  Fuck! I shouldn’t have let her go to work today.

  I’d tried to entice her into staying home with me but she said couldn't because she had meetings. I should have pointed out the date so she agreed, but I didn't want to push the point when she'd been doing so well lately.

  Hiding the letters he’d sent her from jail had been a huge fucking mistake. I'd tried a heap of times to have him taken out when he was locked up—Lainey would be safe forever then—but he bought protection from an unknown source so we couldn't get to him. I thought that hiding the letters would help her concentrate on her recovery, and keep her feeling safe until I could get rid of the bastard, but it had backfired fucking spectacularly this morning. I couldn't exactly spring them on her as a way of scaring her into staying home with me, because she would have chewed my balls off for lying to her and stormed off to work anyway.

  I'd always had a gut feeling that her fucking ex was only laying low since his release, pretending that he respected his parole conditions and the restraining order, and biding his time until he approached her. Psychos like him don't just let their obsessions go free.

  The day his parole ended seemed like a day that he might find poetic enough to make his approach and I'd been worried for the entire goddamned week leading up to it. Following my bloody instincts would have avoided this whole situation. Instead, I'd been a fucking pussy and escorted her to work—without a word of warning—then headed to the workshop to finish up a custom job that was due today.

  Working full time at O’Brien’s Custom Motorcycle’s had never been part of my life's plan but when Lainey nearly died, I’d quit my previous job immediately. There’s no way I could stand to be away from her again, so I'd bought out my Dad’s share when he got sick and I now ran the workshop full time. Even though it hadn't been my ambition, the success of the business and the love of my gorgeous Old Lady, combined with my MC and our families kept my life pretty damn happy and busy. I was as close to satisfied as anyone could be in this fucked up world.

  I hadn't spoken to her since this morning. Lainey works at the law firm that represents the Club while she finishes her degree. It’s unusual for me not to talk to her every couple of hours but my headstrong woman has been on my ass lately about
letting her be more independent and not interrupting her at work.

  Putting a stop to me leaving one of the boys with her at work was her way of gaining some independence, as was not answering my calls unless she wanted to talk. I hadn't been happy about backing off her protection—how could I be with that fucker still out there—but she had a unique way of getting what she wanted out of me. My sexy angel gives a blow job that brings me to my fucking knees.

  I’d pretty much begged her to work full-time at the workshop with me when she was healed since she’s a natural mechanic—but she was determined to follow her dream of becoming a lawyer. One of the senior partners at the firm is an unpatched son of a founding Club brother and he had assured me, on the threat of serious pain if he let me down, that he would protect her with his own fucking life if it came to it. It was a compromise I’d thought I could live with until everything went to shit this afternoon.

  Everyone loves my woman and we are all fucking protective of her, which pisses her off but she deserves it. The shit she's survived would have killed a weaker person–fuck it nearly killed her— but she bounced back and is the same caring, loyal woman she always was.

  I know I go overboard with security. I can't help it, but I have been listening to her and reducing it where I feel comfortable. Right at this moment I wish I had kept someone on her ass, whether she pouted about it or not. I’m so worried about her that I'd almost willingly give up her blowjobs if it meant she waltzed through our front door right now, uninjured and unaware of the fucking chaos her absence is causing.

  Today was a fucking shitstorm from start to finish. Nothing went right after I left Lainey. Club and workshop issues had cropped up, one after another. Then twenty minutes before I was due to go to her office and ride home with her, a Police Tactical Unit and the fucking Bomb Squad swooped on the clubhouse and the workshop to investigate a bomb threat some joker had called in.