Letting Go 2: Stepping Stones [Awakenings 5] (Siren Publishing Classic)

by Michele Zurlo

  It wasn’t a different feeling, just an amplified one. She felt the beginnings of a climax building even though he’d stopped moving.

  He drew his thumb across her lips. “You feel fucking wonderful.”

  She wanted to touch him, but she’d ruined the opportunity by touching herself when she knew he wouldn’t like it. The frustration built, fueling her climax. She needed him to move inside her. “Please.”

  His cock jumped, flexing inside her. “I love it when you beg, my sweet, sweet sub. Very soon, you’ll even mean it.”

  She meant it now, but she knew better than to argue or to plead again. He waited until he was satisfied that she’d accepted his pronouncement, and then he withdrew almost completely. She didn’t know if she could survive his absence. Sabrina dragged in a desperate, shaky breath and surrendered to her fate.

  He played with her, thrusting deep only to withdraw and hold himself over her body, taunting her with his nearness. By the time he established a pattern, she was half out of her mind and seconds from having an orgasm.

  “Please let me come.” Her voice sounded thick and slow in her ears where the noise competed with the steady thrum of her pulse racing out of control.

  When he shook his head, tears gathered in the corners of her eyes, a result of the strain of holding back the storm. She didn’t know how long she could hold on. Because he’d bound her arms and legs, she couldn’t shift her position to ease the fact that he hit her sweet spot every single time.

  It was too much. “Please, Jonas. Please let me come.” She heard it now, what he meant when he said she’d soon be begging in earnest.

  “No.” He pumped into her, harder and faster.

  “Please!” She shrieked and tried to writhe, but the small amount of leverage she had in her hips only helped his cause. “I can’t—” The words were barely out of her mouth when the climax stole her breath.

  She didn’t make a sound, not because she was trying to hide it. There was no disguising the feelings rioting through her system. Her back had arched and the top of her head dug into the pillow. The collar around her neck tightened enough to make its presence known. Every muscle in her body had gone stiff, and she couldn’t have screamed if she’d wanted.

  He doubled his efforts, pounding harder and faster against her pussy. The overload brought her back. She writhed back into position to find that she’d moved up a few inches. That gave her more leverage, but not enough to accomplish anything.

  The tissues between her legs begged for a reprieve, but she knew it wouldn’t be forthcoming. Jonas was in the mood to torture her. She recognized that he’d set her up for failure. There was no way she was coming out of this unscathed.

  She remembered Samantha once telling her that Doms liked to play games like this to prove to their submissives that they have no real control over anything, not even their orgasms.

  “Please, please, please.” Though she had no idea what she begged for, she breathed the word over and over, a prayer that went nowhere.

  He dragged her up that cliff again, proving beyond anything that he was the master of her body. And when she begged for release, he denied her, only to push her over the side. White patches blotted the edges of her vision, and still he didn’t stop. He slowed down. He sped up. He swiveled his hips. He played with her clit and twisted her nipples.

  Tears streamed from her eyes and her throat hurt from screaming words and phrases that made no sense. She lost track of time and space. Counting the orgasms was impossible because the sensations blended together. By the time he came, roaring so loud it echoed from the walls, she had gone numb.

  She floated in the space between lucid dreaming and vague awareness of her surroundings. Jonas was nearby. It felt like he’d released the cuffs holding her prisoner, but she couldn’t be sure and she didn’t have the energy to move a muscle to find out.

  Chapter Eight

  Something cold penetrated the lack of feeling between her legs and a phone rang in the distance. She dimly recognized Ellen’s ringtone for Jonas’s phone.

  The next thing she noted was the quiet murmur of Jonas’s voice. He seemed far away, and that roused her from her fugue state. She needed him to be close, preferably lying next to her with his arms around her.

  Sitting up slowly didn’t stop the room from spinning. She found a bottle of flavored water on the nightstand. When she reached for it, something fell between her legs. Looking down revealed an ice pack. He’d put ice on her pussy. Even now, she could feel the heat radiating from that abused area. She wasn’t sure she wanted to look. Generally she enjoyed the aftereffects when he left her sore. It made for optimal masturbation conditions. But that was forbidden now.

  And she was too sated to muster outrage. She drank the water instead.

  The door to the balcony slid open. Jonas tossed his phone onto a padded chair as he came in. “Ellen says she has everything under control, but she won’t give me details.”

  Sabrina rose to her feet gingerly. The larger shift of her body made her aware of the plug in her ass. It no longer felt like much of anything. “That worries you, doesn’t it?”

  He exhaled a long stream of air and ran his fingers through the short blond curls on his head. “Yes. Whenever Ellen thinks she’s being clever, I get worried. And Ryan won’t answer his phone.”

  As she crossed the room, she noticed the way his gaze roamed over her naked body. He couldn’t possibly be hungry for her again, yet it was there in the heat of his possessive stare. A glance at the clock showed they were more than an hour and a half late for lunch with Mistress Hera.

  “Maybe he’s minding the kids while she’s at work.” Ryan taught at the same high school as Jonas. He was off for the summer, which meant he had three months to be a stay-at-home father, and he loved every moment of it.

  Jonas drew his brows together. “I talked to her on the home phone. I don’t think she intended to answer, but Jake picked up.”

  Jake, Ellen and Ryan’s five-year-old, had just learned which button to push to answer the home phone. Since mostly telemarketers used that number, they didn’t bother to curb his enthusiastic shouts of “Hello!” and “All aboard!”

  Sabrina ran her finger along the shell of his ear. “Are you deaf now?”

  “I remembered to hold the phone far enough away.” He lifted a wayward strand of hair off her shoulder. The careful knot from her shower had come undone. “Are you in the mood for lunch? You haven’t had anything since breakfast.”

  “Yeah. Let me get dressed. Did you call Heather to let her know we were running late?”

  He pressed his lips together, confirming her suspicion that he wasn’t all that jazzed to spend time with his former acquaintance. “She’ll figure it out.”

  Whether or not he wanted to have lunch with Heather was irrelevant. He’d accepted the invitation, and now he was being rude. It wasn’t like him, and it tested the bounds of her patience. “Jonas.”

  He shook his head. “Don’t, Sabrina. Not about this.”

  She dropped her gaze to the floor. “Does this have to do with Helene?” Every muscle in her face clenched at having to utter his ex-wife’s name, but she managed to force it out.

  “No. This has to do with the fact that it’s my honeymoon and I didn’t plan to spend it listening to other people’s problems.”

  Someone who didn’t know him would think he was being heartless. Sabrina recognized his aggravation. She ran a soothing hand up his arm. “It’s just lunch. We’ll listen and be supportive, but there’s not much else we can do.” Then something occurred to her. She shook her head. “I didn’t call Lex or Stef.”

  “I did. They were both in meetings, whatever the hell that means. I talked to Sam. She’s going to convey the message when they get home tonight.” More frustration, but it wasn’t as vehement. The way she caressed his skin was working.

  “You tried. That’s all you can do.”

  He shrugged, dismissing the problem. “I’ll dress you. First we
need to change your plug. Time for a bigger one.”

  She trudged into the bathroom and assumed the position. While she’d been semiconscious, he’d cleaned her juices away, so all he had to do was pop out the old one and insert the new one. The deed was done in a matter of seconds with zero discomfort.

  Jonas scrutinized her when she stood up. “I thought you’d need much more stretching than this.”

  Sabrina shrugged, a perfect imitation of his. “I gave birth to two children. This is small potatoes by comparison.”

  Humor glinted from his eyes, which reflected the multitude of browns and golds in the various bathroom fixtures and finishes. “You know that was your other hole, right?”

  “Whatever.” She waved him away, but he caught her hands.

  “Let’s try a larger size.”

  It wasn’t a suggestion. She settled back down on the countertop and chastised herself for being so blasé. If this hurt, then she deserved it because she’d shot off her mouth. He eased the current one out and tossed it into the sink. Because she was facing the right direction, she saw him grab the largest size. It was wider than his cock. She swallowed all the wrong comments that came to mind. She wanted lunch, not another punishment.

  He worked it past that tight ring of muscle she was beginning to suspect wasn’t all that tight, because it didn’t seem to offer much resistance. It didn’t hurt, but it definitely made its presence known. She wouldn’t be sitting comfortably until he took it out.

  When she wobbled with that first step, he caught her elbow to steady her. “Is it painful or uncomfortable?”

  “I’m not sure I’ll be sitting anywhere for very long.” She gave a nervous laugh. Mistress Hera would either be wondering what he’d done to her or she would guess outright.

  Jonas’s laugh echoed hers, only it contained no trace of anxiety. “You’ll be sitting at my feet. You’re not going as a guest. You’re going as my submissive. You will speak only to me and only with my permission. If anyone talks to you, I will do the answering. You may smile in greeting, but keep your eyes downcast. Only look up at me when you wish to speak. If I acknowledge you, then you may ask permission to talk. If I don’t, then you can assume I’ve denied your request.”

  Her mouth gaped open. She knew this protocol was pretty normal in some circles. Sophia always required her submissives to follow these rules, though Drew, who was also supposed to be in charge of the subs they shared, treated the rules more like suggestions. Ellen used them sometimes with Ryan, but almost never when the four of them were together. She knew her stepbrothers were supposed to be badass Doms, but they almost never reined Sam in.

  “Jonas, I—”

  “Will find out what it means to be submissive. You’re doing okay in private, but you have yet to master how to behave when others are around. Tonight is your first real lesson.”

  Without waiting for her response, he left the room. Sabrina stared at the open doorway, a million conflicting emotions slamming into her. This was the part of being a submissive she feared most. Being used as Jonas’s sex slave was her fantasy come true. The idea of losing her individuality and personal freedoms left her cold.

  But she’d agreed to five days. If she could get through today and tomorrow, she would be done, and she wouldn’t let him down by reneging on their bargain.

  Holding her head high, she ignored the fullness in her ass and went into the bedroom. He had the chastity belt in one hand and a towel in the other. When she entered the room, he smiled the way he usually did when she came into a room where he’d been occupied with something else.

  “You’re still swollen and tender. I’m going to put this ice pack inside your belt. You need to let me know when it’s no longer doing its job. I can’t have you out of commission yet.”

  She said nothing, but she did move closer so he could put the belt on her.

  He regarded her warily. “When we’re alone, you can speak normally unless I say otherwise.”

  But she had nothing to say. Her opinions on this entire experiment weren’t settled. “Okay.”

  Grasping her chin between his thumb and forefinger, he tilted her face upward. “Sabrina, don’t be bratty. I won’t tolerate it.”

  “I wasn’t being bratty. I just don’t have anything to say. I feel so bad for Heather, and I’m afraid you’re going to be rude to her. Well, more rude than you’ve already been.”

  “Ruder. Adjectives of two syllables or fewer generally form the comparative by adding -er.”

  When he started correcting her grammar, she knew he was annoyed. She wrapped her hand around his wrist in warning. “Jonas, don’t start.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “I promise not to be rude to Heather, but you need to call her Mistress Hera. If you meet her away from here as equals, you can use her name. Here it’s considered rude when you fail to use her title, whether or not she’s present.”

  “Any other rules?” She congratulated herself on managing to make her question sound civil.

  He shook his head. “Customs. I’m going to put a leash on that collar around your neck. Sometimes I’ll use it. Other times, I’ll want to hold your hand. That’s my choice, not yours.”

  Her hand went to her neck, where the weight of that piece of leather increased a hundredfold. She’d completely forgotten about it. The thing had become a natural accessory, like a wedding ring, in a matter of hours.

  “When we get there, you may nod a greeting, but you may not say anything. It’s unlikely I’ll give you permission to speak, so you just get to sit there and look pretty.”

  Her comment about his rudeness had brought out his domineering and irritable sides. Perhaps he should have rested with her. She pressed her lips together to stem the tide of argumentative comments piling up behind them.

  “When lunch is served, I will feed you. Every morsel of food you consume will come from me. If it’s not something you want to eat, tough shit. You’ll eat it anyway.”

  Somewhere in the midst of her rising ire, a wave of peace washed ashore and swept the majority of it out to sea. If she couldn’t speak to Mistress Hera, then she couldn’t gush unwanted sympathy or come off as heartless and cold. She didn’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing or giving bad advice because she wasn’t allowed to say anything. This was a blessing in disguise.

  She didn’t worry about lunch. Jonas knew what she liked. She could spend an hour as a pampered pet. She preferred to be treated like a princess, but she wasn’t going to complain.

  “Yes, Jonas.” The soft tone came naturally because she meant it.

  The shock in his expression was quickly replaced with disbelief. “Two minutes ago, you were biting your lips to avoid telling me where to shove it. What happened?”

  Sabrina shrugged. She couldn’t explain it, not really. “I got over it. Are you picking out my clothes?”

  “Yeah.” He gestured to the chair next to the closet where he’d arranged a white, pleated skirt and a stretchy tangerine top. “Accessories first.”

  She held the ice pack in place while he adjusted the chastity belt. The small, thin towel he’d wrapped around the ice shielded her from the shock of something too cold. Next he produced a pair of nipple clamps on a chain. He threaded them through one of the rings on her collar and attached them loosely to her nipples. They pinched, but they didn’t cut off her circulation, which meant they were more for show than enjoyment.

  As she dressed in the outfit he’d chosen, she realized her shirt did nothing to hide the clamps. In fact, the scooped neckline emphasized everything, and of course Jonas didn’t permit underclothing, so she couldn’t wear a padded bra.

  He clipped the leash to her collar and draped it over her shoulder. “You look incredibly sexy.”

  It was a compliment he paid often, so she didn’t know why she flushed and bowed her head. He put his arm around her waist and guided her to the front door. As they left, she noted that he hadn’t bothered to dress up at all. She’d tried to unpack his worn-out jean
shorts before they left Michigan, but he’d just thrown them back into his suitcase. Paired with one of those cheap mall character T-shirts, he looked like a beach bum. On the surface, she looked ready for an upscale restaurant.

  Not that it mattered. No doubt everyone would be looking at her breast features anyway and fail to notice anything else.

  To her surprise, very few people seemed aware of them at all. Most were involved in their own activities. Unless they stopped and fucked in the middle of the street, which she didn’t see happening with her chastity belt locked and the key tucked securely into Jonas’s pocket, they weren’t going to garner more than a passing greeting. That brought Sabrina no small measure of relief.

  Mistress Hera’s private apartment was located in the back quarter of Hades’s Palace. They had to give their names to a guard and take a private elevator to get there. Once inside, Sabrina leaned close to Jonas, though they were the only people in the small car, and whispered in his ear. “It looks like she hasn’t told anyone they aren’t getting paid this week.”

  He lifted one corner of his mouth and shrugged. “Or she told them if they don’t work, they don’t get food and there’s no way off the island. I’ve seen her be ruthless to get what she wants.”

  The elevator dinged, announcing they’d arrived at their destination, and Sabrina lost her chance to find out whether or not Jonas approved of that trait. He sometimes called Ellen ruthless. He’d uttered it as both a compliment and a complaint, so it wasn’t a clear description.

  Mistress Hera waited on the other side of the door. It slid open to reveal the tall woman clad in a flower print sundress that managed to be both stylish and modern. It dipped low, revealing lush cleavage, and it had a slit up the side to show off a generous amount of her shapely legs.

  She held out her hands to Jonas, greeting him first with a kiss to the cheek. Since Jonas wasn’t the kind of man who went around kissing his friends, Sabrina had to stifle her laughter at his discomfort.