Courting Crazy

by J G Jerome

  Ariana looks at us, “Married?”

  Trina interjects, “Yes, Winter Queen. I, Trina ab Koran Mac Laughlin, witnessed the exchange of their vows and tokens. I have reported it to the Elves, and they have recorded it in their roles.”

  I hear an elder male voice call, “It is true, Queen Ariana. I recorded it and replicated the records to all backup records myself.”

  Ariana asks, “And who are you?”

  I smile because I know the answer, but I let him speak for himself.

  He replies, “Queen of the Winter Court, I am O’ren Lightbringer, Loremaster for all the Elven peoples worldwide and recently retired from service at the court of the Lady of the West. It is as Lady Laughlin has described. The Elves have also witnessed the light from their tokens. All is in order.”

  Ariana ponders that news for a moment before turning back Myra, Trina, and myself.

  “Moira, I have learned a little of this Green Lord from Laurel. It doesn’t sound like a good thing,” Ariana says.

  Myra responds, “I’m sure she would spin it that way, Mother. Laurel will manipulate the facts to reach her goals, just like she has manipulated your mind. Morgan’s, too. She makes her mother look like a saint.”

  Ariana lowers her head in shame.

  I hear people walking up behind me. I turn to see the majority of my family standing behind me. All of them are either behind me or facing off the Summer Knights. O’ren and L’ric stand between my guards and my family.

  Myra continues, “There are two important things for you to know about the Green Lord, Mother. First is that love is his super-power. From that super-power he is able to manipulate powers of creation. O’ren could probably provide you with infinite detail, but we don’t really know what the limits of his power are. The second thing you must know is if the Green Lord takes one of the Sidhe crown princesses as his first wife, she becomes the Queen of all Fae.”

  Ariana looks at me and asks, “Is Moira your first wife, Jack?”

  I nod as I answer, “Yes, Ariana. She is.”

  Myra says, “Mother, I ask for your service as we work with Titania to fix all the wrong that is running rampant among the Sidhe and across all the Fae lands. I am the Queen of all Fae.”

  Ariana rises and walks toward Myra slowly. Then I hear Laurel’s groggy voice moan, “Noooooooo.”

  She slowly gets to her feet, and then she exerts her will as her eyes flash blue. “Recognize me! I must be the Faerie Queen,” she moans.

  I look at her, tilt my head, and let her will wash over me. I just look at her. Eventually she stops exerting and just tells me her command. “You will recognize me as the Faerie Queen, NOW!” she screams.

  Just to fuck with her, I open my mouth and close it a couple of times. Then I look at Winter Queen. “Ariana, do you see how I did that?”

  She looks at me and says, “No, Lord. I don’t understand.”

  Ariana continues to walk towards Myra with a look of confused wonder on her face. Her knights array around her. Ariana genuflects before Myra and says, “My daughter, I accept you as my Queen!” She continues quietly, “Darling, I am so confused right now, I don’t know what good I will be. Let me recover, and we can discuss how I can serve the Queen of the Fae.”

  “Noooooo!” Laurel’s fury burns as she growls over Ariana’s conversation with Myra. “You will recognize me, and then you will all die!”

  Ariana looks confused and gets agitated as she starts to stand. I place my hand on her shoulder and ‘remove’ Laurel’s connection.

  I look down at her with concern. “How about that, Ariana?”

  She shakes her head and whispers, “No, Lord. I didn’t sense you doing anything. Just that little cunt leaving my mind. I thought I had the pocket ready for her, but apparently I still need to practice.”

  Myra leans down, lifts her mother, and wraps her arm around her shoulders. Ariana asks, “Am I still to be the Winter Queen, Moira?” Myra nods at her. Ariana replies, “That’s nice.” She sounds like a doddering elderly matron rather than the vibrant MILF standing before me. ‘I gotta help her,’ I think to myself.

  I feel a hand rest on my left shoulder. “Hello, Jack. I see the bitch is back.” Christie steps into my field of vision. She actually directed the words to Laurel. I guess I’m just the straight man.

  Chelsea calls in response from behind us, “Hey now, Christie! Don’t insult us bitches. She’s way too low class to be a bitch.”

  Christie looks at my wolf shifter fiancé, “You’re right, Chelsea. I apologize, sweetie.”

  Then Christie asks Laurel, “Sister, where did you get the idea that you were to be the Faerie Queen? There is no future where you fill that role. There is one where you become the Dread Lord’s footstool, but I really don’t think you would like that. I recently heard how he inducts women into his service.”

  I see the brunette cover the bracelet on her harm as she grimaces.

  I think to myself, ‘I’m gonna need all that armor set!’ I scan the display of arms and armor behind the throne. I send Durec an image of a helm on a shelf behind the throne. I wince when he shouts *Eliana!* in my mind.

  Then I note the large round shield with the correct color hanging behind the throne. Again, I send the image. *Yes, Lord. That is Yoren,* he confirms in a quieter ‘voice.’

  “It is my destiny. Jory said so,” Laurel fumes.

  Christie asks in response, “How many times did you have to suck his cock to get him to agree to that, Laurel? Or did you just influence him? As much as you use that ability, I’m surprised any of us are sane.”

  Laurel’s eyes glow blue as she growls, “Get out of the way, Crystal. I am going to kill that thing you’re leaning on. He’s obviously corrupted you! If you get in the way, I will kill you, too.” She pulls the sword at her side. Her guards back up behind her, and pull their blades in response, but they all look confused about what is happening.

  Ariana tells her immediately, “No, Lady Summer. You will not. If you try, I will strike you down where you stand and make excuses to your mother.”

  Christie stands still and doesn’t show any emotion. I lean to look in her eyes. Christie looks sadly at me and calls out, “Lili! Please?” Then she looks back to her sister, “The first thing I learned from my visions was that I had to learn to defend myself from your ‘influence’ ability, Laurel. It’s been a long time since I’ve been vulnerable to your shit.”

  L’liana runs up as she unbuckles her sword belt and wraps it around the scabbard of her sword. She says, “Here you go, Christie.” She hands the wrapped sword to Christie.

  I continue to watch Laurel, and then I check on Trevor. Laurel doesn’t appear committed to attacking, yet. She’s waving the sword around like a baton. My Goblins all look rather nervous. Trevor is lying there like a sack of broken bones. I reach my hand to the helm and call, “Eliana! To me!” The helmet starts to rock on the shelf. The Raven below it looks up and manages to catch it as falls.

  I quietly ask, “Ariana, would you mind returning that relic to my family?”

  “Will you help me, Jack?” she asks quietly in return.

  I grimace, “Of course, Ariana. Whether you let me have the relics or not!”

  She turns and calls to the Raven, “Bring it. Grab the shield hanging behind the throne, too. They are supposed to be a set.”

  The beautiful, dark-skinned Raven runs forward with the two relics. Laurel takes a step to intercept her, but Jason aims his spear at her, and his knights follow.

  I take the helmet from the pretty woman, and I place it on my head. *Hello, Eliana!* I think to her. *I’d like to have you configure to something like this.* I send her an image of a US Army kevlar helmet.

  I hear chuckles in my head followed by, *We need to work on your sense of style, Lord.*

  *True, but I’m used to wearing this kind of helmet, even if I am out of practice,* I respond.

  Then I take the shield from the Raven. I lift it and settle my arm through the stra
ps. They cinch tight on my forearm. *Hello, Yoren. It’s nice to meet you.*

  I nod my thanks to the Raven, and she quickly returns to her station.

  Then I bow to Ariana and turn to stand next to Christie. I look at Laurel and call, “Gisela! To me!”

  Laurel’s sword belt drops to the ground. It looks like it is trying to slither to me, but that requires energy the relic wasn’t designed to have. Considering the amount of energy spent on Trevor, I decide to save the effort for what appears to be an impending battle.

  Myra steers her mother back to the throne. “Let’s go sit on the dais until Jack is done here. Then we will get you healed.” She hooks an arm around Ariana and walks her back to the dais for the throne. She beckons Trina with her head.

  Christie looks at me with moist eyes. “Jack, I’m afraid it’s time. She doesn’t have the excuse of a bracelet like Selene did. This evil is all her. As promised, my Lord.” She holds the sword so I can grasp the grip and pull it free of the scabbard. It is a narrower bladed version of a Norman long sword with a meter-long blade - very similar to the ones I’ve used to train with Tr’niel.

  I lean in and kiss her temple. “I’m sorry it’s come to this, my Love. I’ll be merciful. I’ll try to shut her down instead if I can.”

  I raise the blade into a guard position and face Laurel. She is no longer swinging the sword around like a bat. She’s holding it in a ready position. My ladies all back away.

  Laurel says, “I am the emissary of the Summer Court. If you even attempt to attack me, it is an attack on the Summer Court. All Seelie will hunt you down.”

  I frown, “That particular hunt has been going on long enough, don’t you think, Laurel? Surrender. I would give my beloved Christie your life if you let me.”

  She sneers in response, “I wouldn’t cross the street to please that traitorous twig. She should WORSHIP me!” She lunges forward and tries to stab me in the gut. I parry the attack easily and shield-check her.

  Laurel falls, but maintains her hold on Morningstar. I extend my will to her - forcing her to sleep as she struggles to stand. The brunette extends her hand, and the bracelet on her wrist glows with a sickening greenish darkness. Laurel starts to stir and regain her feet while keeping the sword pointed at me. Her guards are all freaking out.

  I think, ‘Oh shit! I think it is absorbing the energy I’m generating! Guess I’ll have to do this the hard way.’

  She sneers, “Your vile magic won’t help you, ‘Green Lord.’ If you were really the Green Lord you would be able to keep me asleep”

  I put all of her guards asleep, including the two ladies. They all drop. “Like that?” Slowly the brunette’s bracelet generates more of that sickening miasma. She starts to stir, but the others stay down.

  I call out, “Trina! Prepare to dispose of another one!”

  I hear her “Yes, Lord” response as Laurel begins to shuffle around me, feigning stabbing attacks. I deflect her ineffective thrusts. Her technique sucks. I maneuver around her waiting for an easy opening. I suppose I should just blink behind her and end this.

  So I do! I make the brunette sleep again...she only stumbles. I blink next to her and cut off her arm. ‘That should allow my powers to work.’ Then I step in behind Laurel as she looks back and forth to figure out where I went. I sink my weight low, and I stab my blade so it enters below her ribs and up into the vicinity of her heart as I push with my legs. The blade punches out between two ribs and slides along her sternum. I hold the blade as she sags. I didn’t puncture the heart but did slice a major artery. Her chest is filling rapidly with blood.

  I place my left hand, Yoren’s grip across the palm, on her right shoulder as I slide my right hand under her right hand and whisper, “Morningstar! To me!” The pommel drops across my palm until the grip is securely in my fist.

  Then step over and pick up the sword belt and hold it to my waist. That may sound easy until you consider I’m doing all of this with the grip of a four foot round shield in the hand doing all the work and a long sword in the other. Gisela wraps around my waist.

  I return to Laurel, who is still struggling to stand and breathe. I grab the grip of the sword sticking out of her back and exert my will to put her into a deep sleep. Once that is done, I shut down her brain. As she falls, I strike across her neck with Morningstar. A gout of flame from Morningstar cauterizes both sides of the cut before her head falls from her neck.

  I sheath Morninstar, shrug Yoren off my arm. I pick up her head and place it in the small of her back. I close her eyes and tell her, “I’m sorry, Laurel. Your ambition and harmful deeds left me no choice. I will forgive you the evil you have wrought in this life under the condition you will go forward into the next and do no harm.” I bow down and kiss the top her skull. I try to sense her spirit nearby. I can’t see anything, but I feel her malevolent presence like a hateful child.

  I imagine wrapping her in a loving hug like I would a misbehaving child. The malevolence slowly fades. Eventually so does my sense of her spirit.

  Chapter 41 - Nameless

  I stand, retrieve Yoren, and send a request to loop him over my back. I’m not sure how it works, but it does. I walk over and pull Christie into my arms. She wraps her arms around me and sobs.

  I scan the room and see L’liana has an Elf-tech device she is waving over the brunette’s bracelet. Then she looks up and nods to Trina. Trina puts it into a satchel. L’liana takes it from her and puts it into a pouch on her belt. Then she goes to retrieve her sword from Laurel’s body.

  Christie gently kisses my lips, and I reach in to kiss her tears. I can’t keep up. She sadly smiles at me, “It’s okay, Jack. As long as you love me, I will be okay.”

  I tell her, “I will always love you, my darling Christie.” I continue to cover her temple and forehead with kisses as she tries to bury herself in my chest.

  I hear *Beware, Lord!* just before I see a masked figure in a dappled charcoal grey bodysuit appear just behind Christie’s right shoulder. I spin and twist, pulling Christie with me as I try to get my shield between the gladius wielded by the assassin and my body. I hear a ‘thock’ sound as the short sword sticks into the shield. I release Christie and turn to find the assassin about ten feet away. Marisol pulls her Elven blade and runs to thrust it into the assassin. The assassin blinks back to stand in front of me before slashing towards my neck with a karambit. I call *Jacob!* in my mind to feel the gauntlet cover my right hand and arm as I parry the blade with my hand. I fire off a snap kick to its abdomen just before the assassin blinks back to its original retreat position.

  I send, *Durec, full coverage. Yoren stays on my back! Eliana, whatever you can do to cover my neck without impinging on my field of vision.* I feel the mail glide down my body as Bobo and Pally extend up my shins and over my boots. The helm transforms into more of a balaclava with reinforced skull and ear pieces.

  I hear Eliana say, *Yoren, please drop the assassin’s blade.* The gladius clatters on the ground as my balance corrects itself.

  I call to Marisol, “Honey, please clear out of the way. I need to deal with this.”

  She looks at me stricken, “But my Lord. It’s my job to protect you!”

  I shake my head as I pull Eventide with my left hand. “This one is a gift from the Nameless courtesy of the Dread Lord. Keep an eye out for others. I was told he only hired a single assassin, but that may have changed. This one, I must deal with.”

  I look at the expressionless mask as the assassin slowly stands. I ask, “Did that hurt?” It shrugs. Judging from the build, I’d definitely say Elven. It’s about L’liana’s height, but with slightly sturdier build. Hard to determine its gender.

  I tell it, “Apparently I have to kill you to make the leader of your clan take me seriously. I’d rather not, but I don’t expect you’re going to give me a choice.” It blinks, and I duck just before it appears with legs locked around where my neck was. It blinks out again, and I blink to the second place I saw it retreat to. I arrive
immediately after it does, and I stab with Eventide in my left hand to center of mass as I arrive, punching into the assassin’s abdomen. I think, *Ice?* A moment later I feel Eventide grow colder.

  I keep my right hand, encased in Jacob, ready to parry the next attack. The assassin moans as ice spreads across its body. I see it creep over shoulders and around legs from the back. I assume the ice is running through its body. It drops the blade in its hand and is overcome with shivering.

  I put my hand on its head and will it to sleep. It shakes its head and then looks at me with wide eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m trying to relieve your suffering.”

  I slide my right hand down its left arm and find a small bronze bracelet smoking. *I need fingertips, Jacob.* He changes to look like a metallic workout glove. I feel around the bracelet as I watch the eyes of the assassin. The skin around its eyes is only slightly paler than the uniform it is wearing. I find a latch and pop it open. I feel my finger get pricked by the clasp, and it immediately starts to tingle.

  I lower the assassin to the floor, kneel on its chest, and completely focus my awareness on the poison that is now spreading through my system. I isolate it, focus on its structure and then coach my body to metabolize it. That results in it breaking down into two different toxins! I try a different tactic. I create enzymes to bind and neutralize the toxins, and then I focus on flooding my system with them. That appears to work. I just have to maintain my focus until all the toxic molecules are bound.

  Unfortunately, some got into my organs, which are now causing pain. Okay, one more tactic. I think, ‘What can I do? It’s not like a curse I can remove...or is it?’ I focus on the most painful organ, isolate the toxins and push the enzymes into my organs. Once the toxic molecules are bound. I push them back into my bloodstream and let the kidneys filter them out. Then I focus on the next most painful. Then I figure I better check my brain before I lose focus. ‘Oh shit, there’s a bunch of it here! This shit is diabolical!’ Working on my own brain to expunge the toxins is the hardest bit of healing I’ve done to date. The mental machinery to focus is saturated with this shit! Plus, my method of doing this has one or two levels of abstraction. If I’m not representing everything close enough to correct it in my mind, I’ll die. Slowly I make headway on pushing the toxins out of my brain. Finally, I’m able to really focus and expunge the rest of that crap from my body.