Sweet Venom (Crazy in Love #1)

by Kirsty-Anne Still

  “Clearly not,” Liam replies, chuckling. “It’s all been a fuck up … Lawson tried to warn her off, tellin’ her she wouldn’t cope with life, but she was more than willin’. Said she’d been through more than enough in her time to be able to deal with it.”

  “Yeah, well anyone forced to spend time with the likes of David King would go mentally insane,” I grouse over the fact. “Now … is the contract in his office?”

  He nods, and I go to walk, but I’m stopped by the sound of the elevator announcing it’s on the top floor. I look at Liam, neither of us had heard it leave our floor. Hearing the door open to the elevator followed by an innocent giggle, I immediately forget anything but what happened earlier and make an advance toward the noise.

  “You fuckin’ bitch!” I bellow, my voice hoarse as I become incensed at the mere sight of her. “Who the fuck do you think you are forcing some bastard to attack me?”

  I see Lawson look at Ashley horrified while her lips slowly pull upward into a smile. He looks between us, his expression not knowing if to burn with anger or fall for shock horror.

  “Oh,” I start, laughing humorlessly at Lawson. “I see you hadn’t a clue what this little cow was up to.”

  “I was just showing you that you’re not the only one with claws,” she tells me, forcing laughter to fall from me at her smugness.

  “But I am,” I state, my voice gritty with rage. “You had to use another person to do your dirty work. That’s not how I work. It’s not how The Firm works!” I educate her, harshly. “You never hide behind anyone in this life.”

  “What about Jay?” she asks, her voice wavering.

  “I was teachin’ you the severity of my threat,” I warn her, letting her in on my truths. “I’ll drive you fuckin’ insane before I physically touch you,” I say, telling myself to calm, then roll my shoulders. “Plus … he had it comin’.”

  “He had it coming?” Ashley asks, “Or I did?”

  “Both,” I snarl.

  “What the fuck is going on here?” Lawson asks, folding his arms over his chest as he lays a heavy gaze on me. “And why the fuck are you really here?”

  “I brought her back here,” Liam states, coming to stand by my side.

  “But why?”

  “Because she got some fuckin’ psycho to fucking assault me in a dark alley!” I tell him, unafraid to incriminate Ashley and stop Liam from fighting my corner. “If it weren't for Liam I wouldn’t have got away quite so lightly.”

  “Boss, he was going to rape her,” Liam says, stepping in again. “It was more than just an attack.” I look at him as he doesn’t lock eye contact with Lawson. “I saw the bastard beat her while she was on the ground and before I could reach them he had her pinned against the wall, ready to rape her … I’m sure of it.”

  Lawson’s eyes fall from Liam’s and move over to me. I notice his eyes don’t meet mine. Instead, he catches sight of the graze etched into my cheek, the disheveled look on my face. For a split second his eyes meet mine, but he doesn’t hold my gaze. That fact alone crumples me more than the idea of that man touching me.

  “You’re bleedin’,” he states, pointing to my leg, no more concern for me than that.

  I look down and swear under my breath.

  “C’mon, let me finish clearin’ you up,” Liam says, placing a hand gently on the back of my elbow to lead me back to my seat. “It’s quite superficial, but it won’t stop bleedin’ if you keep movin’.”

  “I’ll let you cover it up, and then I’m out of here,” I state sharply. “Oh, and Ashley?” I call out, leaning back to look at her across the room. “He was more than happy to accuse you, Dawlin’,” I let her know. “Whispered right into my ear who sent him, Miss Johnson. Made sure I knew before he threw me down.”

  “What happened to him?” Ashley asks, her tone lifts with concerns.

  “I nearly killed him,” Liam states bluntly.

  “What?” Ashley gasps. “All I wanted was for her to be dragged from her high horse.”

  “There are ways of doin’ it,” Liam grinds out.

  “Oh, and suddenly you guys have morals,” Ashley states bitterly. “Give me a break.”

  “I have morals where morals are concerned,” he says, and we both watch as Ashley goes to dispute the fact. “Now, look here, Princess,” Liam starts, taping down the gauze to my leg. “I see anyone … and I mean anyone … hurtin’ my own, I won’t hesitate to make my move. It’s what I’m trained to do.” He twists around, putting his entire attention on her. “The moment I see a man manhandlin’ someone I class as family I see red. Now he had his hand right up Eden’s dress, pushing her hard into the wall as he had his way. I wasn’t about to let him continue with what he was doin’.”

  “So, you nearly killed him?” Ashley asks, her voice high with shock.

  “It’s his job,” Lawson testifies, showing his alliance. “He did what I made him vow to do.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Always protect what is ours,” Lawsons adds, his tone taut. “Eden belongs to The Firm. That makes her ours.”

  While his attitude to me is standoffish, his words mean a lot. But with it, I know the feeling will be short-lived. He may be at a crossroads, caught between her and me, but I know that confusion will die down. She’ll win him over, and I know she’ll fight – I forced her to after all.

  “I need some air,” I suddenly say, getting up to get out of the room before the walls close on me.

  I hobble out of the room, finding my leg quite painful. The pain that causes mixed with that in my ribs keeps me occupied from vying thoughts, and I fall into one of the patio seats that looks over the city.

  “Here,” Liam’s voice comes from behind me and I see the whiskey bottle before I see him. “Drink.”

  “Thanks,” I say, taking the bottle.

  Just like inside, he sits on the table in front of me, watching me intently. I down a gulp and go in for a second before I even think of giving him the bottle. He takes the bottle, taking an immediate swig before he settles, licking the liquor from his lips and passes me the bottle back.

  “When he had me against that wall I felt completely powerless,” I admit, meeting Liam’s gaze as he rests on the table before me. “I hate it because I haven’t felt like that in a long time.”

  “When was the last time you felt like that?” Lawson’s voice interjects the conversation.

  Immediately, I stiffen, my every last nerve shatters, and I can feel myself starting to spiral. I look at Liam, fear filling me, and he notices.

  “When her dad died,” he says, coughing up the simplest of lies. “We all hate feelin’ helpless when one of our own dies.”

  “Why would tonight remind you of that, though?” Lawson asks, stepping to the side of us.

  I can’t answer him that. I won’t even begin to form a lie to hide it.

  “Look,” I start, uncurling from the seat. “I’ll get out of your hair,” I say, placing the bottle of drink on the table beside Liam. “I don’t want to outstay my welcome.” I stand, only to go to Liam. I rest my hand on his cheek, kissing the other gently. “Thank you.”

  “Don’t ever sweat it,” he tells me, giving me a wink.

  “You’re a good man, Liam Pearson.”

  I turn, fighting not to look at Lawson, but he catches my hand, his fingertips burn in pure delight against mine. I quickly remind myself that it’s not right, he’s not mine. Not yet anyway.

  “I’m just leavin’,” I tell him, fighting to free myself from his gentle embrace.

  For a moment, I watch him fight with himself, trying to find the words, but I know he’ll never find them. He’ll never be able to say what he can’t internalize. He’s lost, and I helped make him that way.

  For tonight, I admit defeat.

  Tomorrow, Ashley Johnson should fear when the devil knocks.

  “You won’t look me in the eye,” he states, observing my trait. “Where did the bravado go?”

  “Even
a bitch has to rest,” I say, giving him enough sass.

  I want to scream at him, shake him until he realizes the girl he loved, the one that felt safest around him still exists. She’s nestled deep, hiding from the real world, numbed by lies and drugs. I just wish he’d read me like he used to be able to.

  I built the girl up that made a beeline to torture Ashley slowly.

  I can’t be the girl I used to love being.

  “You don’t have to carry on like this,” he tells me, his fingers curling around my wrist, telling me he’s here and willing.

  I give him a brave smile. “Believe me, I do.”

  “Why?”

  “Because you made your choice,” I tell him, bitter shards penetrate my words. “I never stood a chance coming back.”

  “You don’t know that,” he replies.

  I laugh, albeit mirthless. “I see the way you look at her, and I know …” I trail off, swallowing hard against the lump in my throat. “Because you used to look at me in the same way.”

  I shake him off, not needing him to find my voice and strength.

  “I know very little in this life now, Lawson, but I know that I won’t lose you,” I admit, my voice slightly weakened. “And I certainly won’t lose you to Ashley.” I finally shake his hand off. “I’ll make you look at me in that way again one day.”

  “How?” he asks, hoarsely.

  “I don’t know, but you can guarantee that what we started will start again,” I tell him, unmoved for the moment. “And then the world won’t be able to stop us.”

  I step around him, entering the apartment, the warmth from the heating lapses around my cold legs, and I stop only when I see Ashley sitting in my seat, looking pleased with herself.

  “You think you’ve won,” I start to say. “But just you watch.”

  “No,” Ashley says, no longer looking like the naïve girl that watched Lawson fight between love and lust. “Just you watch, Eden Roberts.”

  The fire unleashes into my knuckles first before burning up through my hand exploding through my arm. I rest against the wall, my fist still bright white with the tightness I hold and I shallow my breathing. My anger has been building since seeing Eden at the bar earlier this evening and ever since I’ve struggled to keep it within.

  The wall took the brute force of my dying willpower.

  “Are you going to keep ignorin’ me?” she asks, a tentative tone wrapped around the syllables of her request. “Well?” she pushes when I don’t respond.

  I push away from the wall, turning to face her. She looks so innocent standing before me with her brown hair down over her shoulders, her eyes begging for me to speak, her body open to anything I have to say.

  “It’s been hours,” she adds.

  With bated breath, I take in the sight of her – not for the girl that was passed out in the shadows days ago, not for the girl that fought relentlessly to be here, and not for the girl that won over my cold heart. I take in the sight of the girl that I now know has a lot more secrets than I will ever know.

  It doesn’t take a moment for my curiosity to flare up, forcing images of Eden pinned against a wall defenseless to a man’s advances. I imagine the fear on her face, the fear that comes from a deep-rooted place she’s not familiar with anymore. For a girl I claim to be moving on from, I’m still so fucking wrapped up in her more than ever before.

  In some way, I allowed all of this to happen.

  After all, I welcomed Ashley into our lives, and while I assumed she was harmless, she’s proving she isn’t as innocent as she seems. I always knew the devil to wear many disguises, but this one has me blind-sighted.

  People always claimed Eden to be the devil, some called me it, too, but the devil works in mysterious ways. Any one of us can let dark roam so freely that we forget what our moral obligations are.

  We can all be the devil incarnate whenever we so please – without God willing.

  “Please,” Ashley says, breaking my reverie. “Just talk to me.”

  “What do you want me to say?” I ask her, my tone sharper than she evidently likes. “Want me to praise you somehow, or give you some reward for your reckless behavior?”

  “I wasn’t the only one reckless tonight!” she scoffs, arguing the point. “You did see what she was able to do, right?”

  “I saw,” I bite. “Your way of thinkin’ will get you killed,” I tell her, my tone dangerously low. “Mentality like yours always cost lives.”

  “She made me kill a man,” Ashley argues, albeit weakly.

  “Yeah, I witnessed it,” I say, letting her know I am aware of the evening's events.

  “Then what is the difference?” she asks, throwing her arms out in frustration. “Your world is full of double standards!”

  “You were settling a score,” I remind her, feeling my body tensing up. “She wasn’t. What Eden did tonight was exactly what Eden does. She manipulates you, gets you on her side to then show you that she’ll never be a friend of yours.”

  “What reason did she have, though?” she asks, stepping forward as her desperation peaks. “You said you wait for your dad to call then you go and kill, but what was her reason?”

  “She said she had her reasons,” I state, and I hate I know not a single one.

  “But she didn’t tell you,” she asks, and I shake my head. “But you trust her?”

  “Always,” I say, my belief in that is strong.

  “Even though she’s popping pills and messing with me?” she asks, treading the same line dangerously that I have been. “You trust her when she’s clearly not who you loved. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that everyone in this apartment hasn’t’ a clue who she is anymore!”

  “I don’t care!” I yell, cutting her down. “Eden isn’t stupid. Regardless of whatever pills she is poppin’ or whoever she is chasing, she is never stupid with her decisions.”

  “How do you know that?” she questions, crossing her arms over her chest to fix me with a dark expression. “Tell me how you can possibly know that?”

  “Because I know the woman I used to sleep next to!” I unwillingly admit, my reaction caused from my inner frustration. I watch the devastation hit Ashley’s expression, her eyes watering. “I know because I know the woman I loved enough to want to spend the rest of my life with.”

  “You wanted to marry her?” she asks, her words forming around the lump in her throat.

  “Yes,” I say.

  “You still do,” she tells me, reading me so openly.

  “I did,” I correct her. “Until you. Until you drew my attention.”

  “I’m no one’s second choice,” she tells me as if the idea is heinous.

  “I never said you were,” I admonish, my heart thuds in staccato beats. “But if you stand a chance … in this life or by my side, you can’t do any of it alone. You have to trust me … trust my men and me.”

  I can tell, just from what I know, that Ashley has never had to trust a soul but herself. That’s the crux of her issue – she doesn’t know how to let people in. It’s disheartening that she hasn’t been able to depend on people. Her lonely existence in a busy world has left her volatile.

  “I warned you, Ashley. You knew you weren’t steppin’ into a world you’d like, but you said you’d dealt with worse. I thought you could cope, but now I’m not so sure.”

  “I can,” she argues, advancing toward me. “I can. I promise.”

  “Then you have to show me,” I say. “You have to let me do my job.”

  “Then save me,” she asks, her tone begging. “Save me before I have to kill a man without knowing what I’m doing.”

  “It’s not that easy,” I remark, hating myself for pulling my promises away.

  “What?” she asks, stepping back as she startles at my response.

  “I can’t save you from her,” I admit, weakness wreaking me.

  “Why not?” she asks, her brow furrowing.

  “Because I am powerless,” I confess, my adm
ission is said tiredly, all of my, finally, fight gone. “I can protect you, but I can’t save you.”

  “So, that’s it?” she starts, her voice full of desolation. “That’s the end of us? The end of me?”

  “I didn’t say that,” I tell her, watching the trust she had in me start to shatter. “I can fight a lot of things in life, but where Eden is concerned, I can’t. You’ll be askin’ me the impossible. It’s why I warned you before that there was no stopping her. Only you can fight her.”

  “Then I am on my own,” she says, her voice shakes.

  “No,” I start to say.

  “Then what?” she asks, cocking a brow with a questioning tone. “Because right now you’re making it impossible to read you and even harder to work out what I’m meant to do.”

  “I’m strugglin’ to get over what you did,” I admit, confessing the reason I’m so hesitant to her.

  “It wasn’t that bad,” she says, trying to avoid her responsibility.

  “You had a man attempt to rape her!” I roar, feeling incensed. “This life is crazy enough with what The Firm gets us to do, but never do we use rape as motivators to get our own way.”

  “I didn’t know he was going to rape her,” she tries to argue.

  “He knew what he was doin’,” Liam breaks into the conversation. I look at him, and he holds a piece of paper. “Frazer just got off the phone … it seems Jay was orchestratin’ a sex trafficking ring. You were going to help secure parties for him to sell girls from Russia and Poland without knowin’.”

  “So, Eden was helpin’ me?” I ask, not daring to even look at Ashley.

  “Don’t know why you seem so surprised by that,” Liam grouses, giving the paperwork. “All she ever did was help you.”

  I look at the notes Frazer has written, and I feel my calm start to recede. What Jay was planning was beyond anything I have seen, and he was prepared to incriminate any man that had an involvement – my men and I included.

  “He was plannin’ somethin’ huge, Boss,” Liam states. “I have no idea how Eden found out, but she did us a favor.”