Hitting Bottom

by Ryan Scott

  I go to a check cashing place where they cashed my check, but they keep a big chunk for themselves. My money usually lasts for two or three weeks, but I get drunk a lot.

  On the third month when I go to get my check, the blind man tells me I have just been approved to live in a city owned apartment for $38 per month. Kim and I will take you there if you want to see it.”

  It’s getting cold so I agree to check it out. It’s a newly refurbished one bedroom apartment with kitchen appliances. It could be a trap, but I take a chance and take it.

  “Clyde, I suggest you use some of your money to buy basic supplies,” the blind man says.

  I ain’t going to waste my money on that shit, but I don’t say nothing. That night I try to sleep on the new carpet, but I begin to feel attacked by electronic waves. It’s essential I take steps to defend myself so I buy tools and 2 quarts of 30 weight motor oil; Three-in-one won’t be strong enough. First, I dismantle all the electrical outlets, and then I get busy with the oil. I smear all the windows and mirrors. Then I dribble oil around on the carpets. Now, I feel safer and sleep well that night on a small area of carpets that ain’t got no oil on it.

  When I wake up, I go outside and discovered it snowed over night. That’s unusual for Austin, but everything about Austin is weird. I have to piss so I try to write my initials in the snow with my piss. When an old lady comes out of her apartment, she greets me with a musical, “Hello,” but when she sees what I’m doing, she screams, “Oh for heaven sakes!” and then she slams her door. Fuck her.

  It ain’t long before this heavy set man pounds on my door. “May I step inside? I need to discuss an incident involving you,” he says.

  When he comes in, he takes one look at my handiwork and goes ballistic. “What the hell have you done to this apartment? Get your things and get out. I’ll make sure you’ll never occupy another one of our facilities.”

  I go back to staying in the library during the day to keep warm and sleep in the laundry mat at night, but I don’t tell the blind man.

  I survive during the next six months by depending on my monthly checks, but when I go to collect my next check, the blind man says, “Clyde, I’ve been notified you no longer qualify for SSI. A New York attorney has informed me you’ve inherited a substantial amount of money, but it disqualifies you for SSI.”

  “I want that money now,” I yell.

  “Clyde, I don’t have it, but I’ll contact those attorneys and have your money forwarded to me.”

  Now I know he’s in cahoots with Otis, and I thought I could trust him.

  Chapter 12

  I’m on my usual park bench when I notice a fresh wad of gum stuck to the seat. I like gum so I peel it off and chew it.

  When I happen to notice the blind man sneaking down the sidewalk, I look around for Otis.

  The blind man yells at me.

  “Hey Clyde, I’ve got your inheritance check.”

  When I agree to listen to his bull shit, he tells me he’ll be back with a friend and take me to a bank on Congress Street to cash my check.

  When he shows up with a hippy who is wearing bells and beads driving a VW micro bus, I see right through his game. I back away and shout, “I ain’t getting’ into no damn car with a hippy!

  The blind man looks disgusted. “All right Clyde, if that’s the way you want it, here’s your check. I wash my hands!”

  I grab my check and stuff it in my pocket. As I march down the street, I think, Otis ain’t gonna win this one!

  I go back to the park and relax before I go to the check cashing place. My gum has lost all of its flavor so I wrap it in a scrap of paper and throw it away.

  When I’m about to cash my check, I reach in my pocket for the check, but it ain’t there! I reach again, but it’s gone! Those damn Mexicans did it again.

  I feel like shit and walk to the bakery on Forty Third Street where I sit on an outside chair and mope. Suddenly I hear a dog barking like crazy. When I look up, I see Dog! He’s alive! He’s across the street tied to a bicycle rack. When I go to him, he jumps against my legs and licks my hands, wagging his tail. I unfasten the red leash attached to the red collar and quickly walk away with Dog following behind me. I lost my money, but I found my dog!

  When we’re back at the park, I rub his head and scratch his back. “Dog, I promise I won’t let them take you away again. We’re going to be together forever.”

  He runs and gets a stick, and we play for a long time.

  During the next three weeks, Dog goes with me wherever I go. Because he has his license and rabies tags, I don’t worry so much about the dog catcher. We visit our favorite garbage cans and find plenty of things to eat. With him back in my life, people are beginning to speak to me, even pretty girls. I feel happy and don’t worry about Otis. For the first time in my life, I feel peaceful.

  One day, the blind man shows up again. “Clyde, look at what someone found in the park and brought to me.”

  It’s my check all wadded up with gum.

  I know I said I wash my hands of your affairs,” he says, “But if you want, we can take a cab to the bank and see if we can cash your check.”

  “That hippy ain’t going to be with us?” I ask, suspecting a trick.

  “No, just you and I.”

  Dog waits at the door while the blind man and me go inside the bank.

  The blind man asks to speak to the manager. When he comes out of his office, the blind man says, “This will probably be the most outlandish request you’ve received. This man here has no identification, no address and no place of work, but he wants to cash his inheritance check.”

  When he hands the check still wrapped in gum, the manager takes it between his thumb and index finger, acting like its poison. “Let me see what I can do?” he says and takes the check into his office. When he comes back, the check has been straightened out and laminated. “Sign right here and I’ll submit it. All the essential parts are visible so it might work.”

  “Can I have my money now?” I ask.

  “No, it has to be approved, but if it is, you can pick up your money in four days.”

  Chapter 13

  Four days later, I go to the bank and collect $7,200. After I stuff the money in my pocket that has a zipper, I go to a fancy hotel where I tell the man at the desk I want his best room.

  When he tells me they don’t allow dogs. I tell him to go to hell and pick another hotel. When I say I want the best room they’ve got, the man at the desk tells me it cost $350 a night. I throw down the money and go to my room located on the top floor.

  It’s the nicest room I’ve ever occupied. It has a giant bed and expensive furniture with a view of the lake. Dog jumps in the middle of the bed and makes himself at home.

  “Ok Dog, let’s see what we can order from room service. I pick oysters, crab and ice cream for myself and a New York steak for dog. There’s a cabinet full of liquor so I immediately begin to drink. When the food is delivered, I tip the waiter $100, and then I hang the do not disturb sign on the door. I don’t want the maids spying on me.

  Because the room is high up, the CIA waves are weaker so my protective measures are less extreme. After I spray a little squirt of three and one oil on the mirrors, I tear out the toilet and put it on its side, but I don’t find no secret camera. After that, I use the bathtub for pissing and shitting.

  After three days, I move to another hotel and treat the mirrors and the toilet as well. On my fifth hotel, when I remove the faucets from the bathtub, water sprays into the tub faster than it can drain. I watch the water spill over and flood the bathroom. Soon, it spreads into the bedroom so I check out.

  Dog and I are back on the street, and I’m hungry so I stop at a restaurant for hamburgers. When I reach in my pocket there’s only a $5 bill. Where the hell did my money go? I’ll bet those Mexicans stole it. Its cold, but Dog and I sleep in the park that night.

  The next day, I go to the Blind man and tell him my money is gone and could I get back
on SSI.

  He shakes his head, “Clyde, you’re like a bad penny. I told you I was through with your affairs, but I’ll make a couple of phone calls. You stay out here. I don’t want you to stink up my house.”

  “You sure know how to hurt a fellow’s feelings,” I tell him.

  He comes back out and says, “Here is the deal. You have to go to the Social Security office on 6th Street and reapply. Here’s their address. You can go there any time. I’ve also located a place that will give you a room and three meals a day for the amount of your SSI check, but they’ll return $50 each month for you to spend.”

  “Where is this place?” I ask, suspecting another trick.

  “It’s on 12th Street, not too far from the freeway.”

  “I ain’t going to stay there. That’s where blacks live! Forget SSI!”

  “Suit yourself, Clyde; just don’t bother me anymore. I’ve tried my best to improve your life, but you tear everything down. Good bye and good luck.”

  I knew I couldn’t trust him right from the start. I walk away and turn up my collar against the blue northern that’s beginning to blow.

  During the next four days, the temperature drops below freezing. Dog and I go to all the garbage cans and dumpsters, but we are unable to find anything to eat. My nose begins to run and it hurts when I cough. I’m cold, wet and hungry. Dog is hungry also, and he whimpers at my side. That night, we sleep in the laundry mat but it’s cold there too. I feel weak and I think I have a fever. Dog and I scavenge the garbage cans again, but no one is throwing their left overs away.

  I’m shaking and dog is very hungry. I can see his ribs. Finally, I do something I thought I would never do. I call Otis.

  When he picks up the phone, I say, “Otis, you win. You’ve broken me and I need help. Could you help a fellow out?”

  “Listen Clyde, I’ve tried to help you for years, but you always think I’m trying to hurt you. I no longer give a shit about you. Don’t call anymore!” he says and hangs up.

  I’m defeated. With my last bit of strength, I walk to the top level of the Adobe Parking Garage. It’s deserted and a cold rain is falling with wind blowing in my face. I walk to the edge and look at the twinkling lights of the city below. I pick up Dog and hold him tight. “Look Dog. See all the lights. We’re going to stay here until we hear the melody.

  The big clock at the University begins to count the hours.

  Bong, bong, bong, bong.

  “Dog, once I had a home. Once I had a family. Once I had people who loved me. Once I had hope.”

  Bong, bong, bong, bong.

  I bury my face in his fur and feel his warm body. “Dog, you’re the only one who loves me. You’re the only one I trust. You’re the only one I love!”

  Bong, bong, bong, bong.

  The melody floats over the air. The voice says, “Jump!” and I step over the edge.