Trusting Tomorrow

by P. J. Trebelhorn

  “I don’t want to fuck you, I want to make love to you. Will you let me?”

  Brooke pulled back and looked at her. Logan sucked in a breath at the look of pure desire she saw. She moved her fingers slowly, relishing the wet heat as she entered Brooke’s folds. Brooke shuddered under her touch but managed to cup her cheek momentarily.

  “Yes, but please hurry. I feel like I might spontaneously combust if you don’t go inside soon. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this with you.”

  Logan entered her slowly with two fingers and watched Brooke’s eyes slide closed. Her hips moved in rhythm with Logan’s slow thrusts, and she made little moaning noises every time Logan’s thumb made contact with her clit.

  “Look at me.” Logan’s voice was commanding, and when Brooke didn’t do as she asked, Logan stopped moving. Once Brooke finally opened her eyes, Logan started again, but even slower than before. “I want you to look at me when you come.”

  Brooke sucked in her bottom lip and nodded while moving her hips faster with each thrust, causing Logan’s thumb to collide with her clit with more force. Brooke threw a leg over Logan’s body, and Logan resituated herself so she was on her back. Brooke wasted no time straddling her, her hands on Logan’s shoulders. Logan watched as Brooke moved up and down on her fingers, her clit rubbing against Logan’s belly with each downward motion.

  Logan felt the muscles contracting hard around her fingers a fraction of a second before Brooke cried out in pleasure. She fell forward so she was on top of Logan, her body still pressing down hard against her hand.

  “Logan…so fucking good…please…don’t stop.”

  Logan curled her fingers and pressed the heel of her hand against her clit as Brooke’s walls tightened around her hand and she cried out again, her hips pumping furiously to milk all she could out of her second orgasm.

  After a moment, her movements ceased, and she collapsed with a sigh on top of Logan. Logan chuckled when she whimpered in protest as Logan slowly pulled out of her. One last spasm gripped her fingers tightly before she was completely free. Logan wrapped her arms around her and held her.

  “Are you okay?”

  “I think all my bones have liquefied, thank you very much.” Brooke didn’t move at all, and Logan kissed her gently on the temple. “I hope you’re proud of yourself.”

  “I am.” They lay quietly for a long moment, both catching their breath.

  Brooke lifted her head and looked at her. She’d never before had the sensation of being thoroughly sated, yet craving so much more. She caressed Logan’s cheek with the backs of her fingers as she stared into her eyes. She smiled at the uncontrollable tremors that still shook her periodically as her body tried to recover from what Logan had done to it.

  “You should be.” Brooke felt her cheeks flush in embarrassment at her next words. “I’ve never had two orgasms before. And I’ve never come so hard.”

  “I’m honored to have been your first.”

  Brooke’s first reaction was to laugh, but she could see the sincerity in Logan’s eyes as she spoke. This wasn’t a line she used on just anyone. Brooke felt as though someone truly cherished her. She’d never felt so much before, from anyone. Her heart swelled in her chest.

  “Don’t move. I want you just like this.” Brooke kissed her quickly before sliding down her body and settling between her legs. Logan’s eyes were hooded, and Brooke ran a finger slowly through Logan’s wetness, causing Logan’s hips to buck.

  “Jesus,” Logan said in a strangled whisper. She gripped Brooke’s wrist and pulled her back up, shaking her head. “I’m not used to giving up control.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “I’ve always been the one in control in the bedroom.”

  “So you’re a top?” Brooke cocked her head to one side. She still didn’t understand what Logan was trying to say. Logan let out a frustrated sigh and turned her head away. It dawned on Brooke what Logan was having trouble verbalizing. She gently forced Logan to turn her head back toward her and waited patiently until Logan met her eyes. “You don’t allow anyone to touch you, am I right?”

  Logan nodded but didn’t look away. Brooke took it as a positive sign and kissed her on the chin.

  “Not ever?”

  “Not since my ex.”

  “Baby, how do you…” Brooke faltered, not quite knowing how to say it. If she was doing the math right, her last girlfriend had been almost fifteen years ago.

  “Get off?” Logan asked after a moment. Brooke nodded. “I usually just take care of it myself while I’m touching the other person.”

  “But you didn’t do it tonight.” Brooke wasn’t asking. Even though she was busy enjoying her two orgasms, she was enough in tune with Logan’s body to know she hadn’t come. “Why?”

  Logan shrugged and tried to look away again, but Brooke wouldn’t let her. She placed her hands on either side of Logan’s face and stared into her eyes.

  “Please talk to me,” she said quietly. “Don’t shut me out. I desperately want to touch you, but if it isn’t what you want, I would never force you.”

  Logan’s stare was defiant, and Brooke was about to give up. She stopped herself when she saw Logan’s expression soften. Brooke’s throat constricted with emotion when she noticed the tears welling up in Logan’s eyes. She used her thumbs to gently wipe the tears away.

  “I want you in ways I’ve never wanted anyone before,” Logan said, her voice so quiet Brooke had to actually watch her lips in order to really hear what she was saying. “I thought if I didn’t let anyone touch me I could keep on being happy without someone in my life. It gave me pleasure to give pleasure, and I never let them get close enough to touch me. Then you had to show up, and everything I thought I knew about myself went right out the window. I need you to touch me, Brooke. I need you to make me come. It scares me to think about how much I need your touch.”

  The tears fell then, and Brooke couldn’t help crying too. The emotions were too much to handle. Logan held her tightly and buried her face in Brooke’s shoulder.

  “Shhh, baby, it’s okay,” she whispered, holding Logan just as tightly. She murmured the same things over and over in an attempt to calm Logan, and after a couple of minutes, she stopped crying. “Are you all right?”

  “I’m sorry. I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to go.”

  “You have nothing to apologize for, and you aren’t getting rid of me so easily.” Brooke kissed her neck and smiled when Logan groaned playfully. “Will you let me make love to you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Tell me to stop if it gets to be too much.” Brooke waited until Logan nodded her assent before kissing her throat.

  Brooke moved down her body slowly, wanting to give Logan time to get used to her touch. When she closed her lips around an erect nipple and began to suck gently, she thought Logan might make her stop, but she was pleased to feel her hands on her shoulders, urging her to move farther down her body.

  “Oh…yes,” Logan rasped when Brooke’s mouth made contact with the heated flesh between her legs.

  Logan let her legs fall open and Brooke ran her tongue along her sex, eliciting a primal moan that caused a shiver to run down Brooke’s spine. Logan’s hips bucked when Brooke entered her with her tongue, and when she didn’t ask her to stop, Brooke pulled out and covered her clit with her mouth. She sucked gently and slowly penetrated her with a finger. When Logan didn’t object, she added another finger. She opened her eyes and saw Logan squeezing her own nipple and knew it wasn’t going to take much to push her over the edge.

  Brooke thrust into her while her tongue quickly flicked Logan’s clit. She felt the muscles clamp tightly around her fingers, and Logan’s body stiffened with her hips raised off the bed. When she finally cried out and went limp, Brooke crawled back up the bed to lie next to her.

  “Oh fuck.”

  “Are you all right?” Brooke asked quietly.

  “Better than all right.” She put her arms arou
nd Brooke and pulled her against her body. Brooke settled her head against Logan’s chest, amazed at how fast her heart was beating. “I can’t find words to describe how I feel right now. But it’s definitely better than all right. Thank you.”

  “You never have to thank me for doing something I want to do.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  Brooke raised her head to look at the clock next to the bed, surprised to find it was almost midnight. Logan rolled them over so she was on top once again.

  “You’re mine for the rest of the night,” she said, and Brooke’s pulse spiked at the possessive tone in her voice. “If they haven’t needed you by now, then they’ll be fine until morning.”

  Brooke wrapped her legs around Logan’s waist and pressed her center hard into Logan’s pelvis, causing them both to suck in a breath. She kissed Logan as they began to move in unison. Brooke didn’t think she could get dressed and go home now even if she wanted to. But leaving was pretty much the furthest thing from her mind.

  Chapter Twenty-five

  Logan woke at six the next morning. She tried to turn onto her side before she realized Brooke was there, one leg slung over both of hers, and an arm across her torso. She sucked in a breath when Brooke’s hand moved up to cup her breast, and memories of the night before flooded her mind.

  Normally, waking up with a woman in her arms meant it was time to make her retreat before said woman woke up. But Logan knew in her heart the last thing she wanted to do was run away from Brooke. She was definitely falling in love, and the thought scared the hell out of her. But nothing scared her more than the possibility Brooke wouldn’t return her feelings.

  She pushed the thought from her mind and worked at extricating herself from Brooke’s grasp. When she was completely free, she stood and watched Brooke, a feeling of contentment washing over her. Brooke reached out in her sleep and Logan moved her pillow so Brooke latched on to it and wrapped it in her arms.

  Her stomach growled, and she remembered she didn’t have anything in the apartment to eat. After quickly getting dressed, she grabbed her keys and made the decision to drive in to Riverside to get some bagels and cream cheese. Before she left though, she placed a soft kiss on Brooke’s lips. Brooke moaned and held tighter to her pillow, and Logan felt her sex clench in response. After the night they’d shared, the last thing she should want was more sex, but she couldn’t seem to get enough of Brooke. She turned and left before she changed her mind and woke Brooke up.

  *

  Brooke opened her eyes when she heard her cell phone ringing. She scrambled out of the bed and found her purse on the floor near the bathroom where she had dropped it the night before. As she stood with the phone in her hand she looked back at the bed and felt a pang of disappointment to find Logan wasn’t there. A quick glance at the phone’s display told her nothing. It was a restricted number. With a feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach, she answered the call.

  “Hello?” She made her way back to the bed and sat down.

  “Brooke?”

  Brooke didn’t recognize the voice at first, but then the feeling of dread quickly turned into panic when she realized it was Wendy. Fuck.

  “Brooke, are you there?”

  “I’m here. What do you want, Wendy?” She knew she should have gotten a new phone with a new number when she moved, but she hadn’t heard from Wendy in months and thought she was through with her.

  “I ran into your father yesterday at the supermarket and he told me what happened to your grandfather. Long story short, I’m in Oakville and I want to see you.”

  “You’re in Oakville? What the hell, Wendy? What would make you drive all the way here from Philadelphia?”

  Brooke held the phone to her ear as she tried to get her clothes on. She vacillated between being furious with her father for telling Wendy where she was and being irate with Wendy for having the gall to show up. There had been a reason she’d never brought Wendy to see her grandparents, and it had nothing to do with wanting to keep her sexuality a secret from them. It had taken her almost six months after Wendy left her to admit to herself it was because she’d known they weren’t going to last. She’d never really been in love with Wendy.

  “I want to see you.” Wendy spoke in a tone that indicated she thought Brooke was a child, which only made her more livid.

  “I don’t want to see you,” she said in the same tone. Fully dressed now, Brooke walked to the bathroom and then to the kitchen looking for Logan. Where the hell was she? She walked back to the bedroom and looked at the clock on the nightstand. She tried to ignore the feeling Logan might have woken up and regretted what they’d done the night before. “Jesus, Wendy, what would possess you to call me before seven o’clock in the morning?”

  “I drove all night to get here. Please, baby, I need to see you.”

  “Baby? Really? After what you did to me, you have no right to call me that.”

  “I’m sorry. For everything. I’m in a little diner across the street from a funeral home. Wait, I’ll tell you the name of it.”

  Brooke’s heart beat faster as she waited for Wendy to go look, but she knew what she was going to say. She closed her eyes and prayed for Logan to come back.

  “It’s on Main Street, and the business across the street is Swift Funeral Home. Please, Brooke, I just want to talk to you. Will you come have breakfast with me?”

  “I’ll be there in a few minutes.” Brooke ended the call without waiting for a response. She felt sick to her stomach. She didn’t really want to see her, but hoped this was a way of getting rid of Wendy once and for all. The last time they’d seen each other, Brooke hadn’t been ready to give up on them, but a lot had changed since then. She’d changed, and it was time to let Wendy know it. Why would she even be in town? It sure as hell couldn’t be to offer her condolences on her grandfather’s death, because it wasn’t her style. Brooke let out a frustrated sigh and pulled a piece of paper out of her purse to write a note for Logan. She left it on the pillow before heading down the stairs and out the front door of the funeral home.

  *

  “It’s so good to see you again,” Wendy said. She attempted to hug her when Brooke walked up to the table, but Brooke pushed her away before taking a seat in the booth.

  “I’m sorry about your grandfather.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I saw you come out of the building across the street. What were you doing at a funeral home so early in the morning?”

  Brooke thought about lying, about telling Wendy there were loose ends with her grandfather’s funeral, but what would be the point? Really, what Brooke did was none of Wendy’s business, period.

  “A friend of mine owns it and lives upstairs.” Brooke nodded at the waitress when she stopped at the table with a coffee pot in hand.

  “A friend?” Wendy asked, her tone suspicious.

  Brooke thought it was ironic, since Wendy was the one who always lied. What right did she have to be skeptical about anything Brooke said? Wendy looked upset, and part of Brooke was extremely pleased at the reaction. She didn’t respond as she poured some cream into her coffee.

  “A girlfriend?” Wendy finally asked when Brooke didn’t respond.

  “In case you’ve forgotten, you have no right to be upset if I’m seeing someone. You lost that right when you left me to get pregnant by sleeping with a man. And his wife. Are you all still one big happy family?” Brooke noted the way Wendy turned her head away and sat back in her chair. Apparently, the answer was no, and Brooke was thrilled to realize she didn’t care. “I don’t understand why you did things the way you did, and honestly, at this point, I don’t even want to understand. The fact of the matter is, you left me and I’ve finally moved on. I’m happy. You need to do the same, so why the hell are you even here, Wendy?”

  “I want you back.”

  Brooke laughed. She couldn’t help it. Wendy looked hurt by her reaction, and it only made her laugh more. Could Wendy really have expecte
d Brooke to welcome her back with open arms? People were looking at them and Brooke didn’t care. When she finally managed to stop laughing, she leaned forward and spoke quietly.

  “You were too late to get me back the first time you had sex with him. I’m assuming it was before you actually left me?” Brooke didn’t wait for an answer because she knew what it would be, and she also knew Wendy would lie about it. It was what she did so well. “Maybe you wanted to try it out first to see if you were going to like it? We’ve been broken up for just over nine months, and the baby was born about eight weeks ago, am I right?”

  Wendy’s jaw clenched as she gazed out the window to her right. Brooke was trying hard not to lose her patience, but she didn’t want to be there with her ex. She wanted to find Logan and spend the day doing the same things they’d done all night.

  “Why isn’t the baby here with you?”

  Brooke watched in silence as Wendy folded and unfolded her napkin over and over. She started to speak a couple of times, but then shook her head and let out an audible breath. Brooke was getting tired of waiting and glanced across the street to see Logan running up the walk to the front doors of the funeral home, a grocery bag in her hand. Brooke wanted nothing more in that moment than to be back there with Logan in her arms. Making love. She closed her eyes to try to keep her mind from going there and took a deep breath.

  “They threw me out.”

  “What?” Brooke looked at her—really looked at her—for the first time since she’d sat at the table. The waitress came by and refilled their coffee cups, but Brooke waved her away when she asked if they were ready to order. Wendy looked tired. There were visible bags under her eyes and she was too thin for just having delivered a baby. “Tell me what happened.”

  “They threw me out and won’t let me see Lucy. That’s her name,” Wendy said with a smile so sad it almost broke Brooke’s heart. “They’re taking me to court to try to get full custody from me.”

  “They can’t do that,” Brooke said. It was the first thing to come into her mind, but of course they could.