Eyes On Him

by Riley Knight

  Now, if only Julian felt the same. If only by some wild, wonderful chance, Julian thought that it sounded just as amazing, just as perfect …

  Luca dared to look into the other man’s eyes. He gasped when he saw the light in them, when he saw how they shone, when he felt the radiance of the beautiful man’s smile, warming him from the very core of his being all the way to his skin.

  “Yes,” Julian said, and that was all that he said. But it was also all that he needed to say because it said everything. “Yes, Luca.”

  * * *

  Luca had thought that he was going to have to wait until Julian was done with the album, and he was determined to do so without bothering his lover with it. Yes, he was nervous. He had some savings, but it wasn’t exactly cheap to live in the city with no income.

  His savings started to dwindle, and the answer seemed clear. He would find a local job, something that would let him stay right in town to write about it, and even if it just paid a little bit, it would be something.

  Julian was deeply absorbed in his work these days. He’d brought a piano, a real, honest to God, wooden musical instrument, into Luca’s house, and most of the time, Luca could hear him playing it, figuring songs out. So Luca quietly started to search for some way to make money himself.

  Only to find that no place would hire him.

  Practically overnight, his name had become dirt in the community. Most of the places that he reached out to didn’t even answer him. A few did, with terse instructions for him not to ever contact them again.

  It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure it out. Maybe his former boss had never said that Luca would never work in that town again, he’d never done anything so stereotypical as spitting those words at him on the way out, but it was obvious that that’s what he’d done. A few words whispered in the right ears, and no place wanted to even look at Luca.

  “Oh my God,” Julian said when Luca told him. “What a douche move. It doesn’t matter. How far can this guy reach? You have the whole world at your fingertips, babe. This is just one city.”

  It was true, but …

  “I can’t afford to live here much longer without making money,” Luca said, deeply ashamed of himself. Like he’d done something wrong, which it genuinely felt like he had.

  “Stop it! You walked out of a toxic workplace. Stop feeling like you deserve this,” Julian said, with that quiet intensity of his, those dark eyes burning as they seemed able to see deep into his very soul.

  “Julian,” Luca whispered, and then he nodded. He’d forgotten, for a moment. He’d let some old habits, self-doubt and fear, get in the way, but Julian had this amazing way about him of being able to blow those completely out of his mind.

  “It’s fine. I’m done.” Julian smirked at the look of surprise that Luca knew was showing on his face. “I’m done, baby. I need to record them, but if you can wait a week, then we can go.”

  That very day, Luca searched for, and found, his first freelance job since he’d worked for that terrible newspaper. In Japan. For the same company that had hired him before, actually. They’d been happy with his work, and Julian, as it turned out, was right. Even if his name was dirt in this city, it wasn’t everywhere.

  Another idea began to form. Hadn’t he wanted to take Julian with him to Japan? And there was another little bit of unfinished business that he wanted to wrap up before he and Julian took on the world together.

  Everything was perfect, at least between him and Julian. They had everything ahead of them. Luca would have been completely happy, but there was just one more thing that needed to be done.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Julian

  Luca was devious when he wanted to be. He looked so angelic, with his soft hair and full lips and those gorgeous green eyes, but there was more to him than that. So much more, as Julian was coming to know.

  But it was the perfect plan, and Julian didn’t waste any time agreeing to it. His life was utterly perfect these days, with one exception. Ella. He was so happy, and she was still so miserable. His best friend in the whole world, the one that had been there for him even when Luca hadn’t been, and she was so sad.

  Julian could barely keep his smirk to himself as he looked at her. They were in the airport, and she, being the amazing friend that she was, had come to see them off. Just as Julian had known she would.

  She’d supported him. She’d kicked his ass, verbally speaking, when he’d needed it. She’d helped him be a better person, and she’d helped him through some very tough times.

  Time for him to do the same.

  “I’ll miss you guys so much,” Ella said, and she impulsively gave Julian a hug, and then Luca. Julian couldn’t help but smile at that. Ella had very high standards, and the fact that she was clearly crazy about Julian’s boyfriend pleased him greatly.

  It showed she had good taste, for one thing. And it made things much easier when they were all hanging out together.

  “Well, don’t get too busy with the missing us thing already,” Luca said, grinning. Julian knew that it had been hard for his boyfriend to keep this secret, to keep from blurting it out. Even Julian, who tended to be more closed-lipped than most, had been struggling.

  “Yeah. We’re not quite ready to say goodbye yet,” Julian said, nodding to Luca. Yes, it was time.

  “What’s going on?” Ella asked, and Julian smirked as he slid his hand into his pocket. He pulled out a sheaf of papers, too many to be just two tickets.

  “Come on,” Julian said, gazing at Ella, watching in amusement as her face went slack with surprise. “We have a plane to catch.”

  Ella shook her head, obviously trying to clear it, a dazed look in her eyes.

  “Wait, what? I can’t! I don’t have my passport, or any clothes, or anything!”

  Julian laughed softly and handed over one of the suitcases that he was carrying. She took it numbly, and then he passed her the little folder with her passport in it.

  “You never took your key back from me,” Julian said, smug as he watched her struggle to deal with all of this. She had had no idea. There had been times where he’d been sure that she had figured it all out, but she had clearly been clueless. It had never occurred to her that he might do this. After all, it wasn’t really a normal thing to do.

  “Oh my God. You sons of bitches,” Ella said, and then she took a deep, deep breath. Even now, Julian couldn’t be sure that she would go for it, and he wouldn’t force her onto the plane, but he found himself very much hoping that she would take him up on it.

  “Japan,” Ella said, and then her face fell. “Wait. I can’t. I have work.”

  Luca walked over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him, fear and hope warring on her face. As someone who had felt that particular mixture of emotions, Julian could easily tell that they were paralyzing her. But they had a plane to catch, and they couldn’t stay for long.

  “It’s just a job,” Luca said, his quiet voice really only meant for her. Julian heard it, but Luca wasn’t talking to him. He was speaking entirely to Ella. “This could be everything. Do you love your job so much that you’ll miss out on this chance?”

  For a moment, Julian was sure that they’d lost her. She shook her head, and the fear flashed brighter on her face. She was going to turn and run away, just like she’d done in the first place when she’d kicked Kiran out.

  Then that fear was gone, and instead, Ella gave a short nod.

  “We have a plane to catch,” she said, and Julian and Luca looked at each other and grinned.

  * * *

  The flight was miserable, and it seemed to drag on forever. Julian had never traveled all that much, but he was going to have to get used to it. The window was tiny, and he could barely see anything. What was there to see, anyway, he thought to himself grumpily. Some stupid ocean. That was it.

  Until Luca, who was sitting beside him, took his hand and they both looked out the window as Julian saw Japan for the first time.r />
  Kyoto was utterly gorgeous. The sun glinted on the city, making it look like it was shining, and it was all set off, buildings and skyscrapers and temples, by the mountains that reared up into the sky behind it, as though trying to protect it.

  It was the first step on the road of their journey through life together, and it was perfect. All of his misery, all of his airsickness, faded away as he rested his head on Luca’s shoulder and gazed out the small, thick airplane window.

  “Are you guys sure that I should be doing this?” a familiar voice asked, and Julian turned to look at his best friend, who looked terrible. Not from the flight, Julian was willing to bet, but just from nerves.

  She had every reason to be, he had to admit that. But he wasn’t going to shove that in her face. She clearly knew that she’d messed up, and also that there was a chance that Kiran would see her and turn and walk right out of the airport.

  “Yes,” Julian said firmly, while he felt Luca nodding at his side. “I am really sure that you should do this.”

  “What if he still hates me?” Ella asked, her face as pale as it could really get, given her dusky skin. “What if he refuses to even talk to me? What if he yells at me?”

  Luca shook his head, obviously trying to respectfully hold back some laughter at that. But his voice was solemn enough as he spoke.

  “He doesn’t yell,” Luca assured her, and she frowned, looking a little bit less uncertain, though still worried. Of course she was.

  “And if he does refuse to talk to you, at least that’s closure, right?” Julian had seen how the whole thing had bothered her for months and months. Even just being able to move on, that had to be worth something.

  Deep down, though, in some romantic part of himself that he didn’t look at very often, but which was the core of all of his songs, Julian hoped that Kiran didn’t run. He hoped that he forgave and that Ella found the happiness that she deserved.

  It was a long shot, and Julian knew it, but both he and Luca had figured that it was worth a shot. Ella seemed to agree because after a long pause in which she visibly did her best to swallow down her fear, the woman nodded, and they all collected their carry-on bags.

  Terror practically radiated off of Ella, but she was there, brave and strong and with her head high as they deplaned. She was there, and she was ready, Julian thought, to admit her mistake.

  That was something. Even that was progress. No matter what happened with Kiran, he had the idea that Ella would walk away from this a better person.

  Now, if only Kiran were able to get over his stung pride, this just might be something really good for both of them. It wasn’t up to Julian, or to Luca. It was Ella, and Kiran, who had to decide that.

  Which didn’t stop Julian from hoping. Nor, from the way that Luca was gripping his hand, their fingers tightly laced together, was it stopping Luca from having that very same hope.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Luca

  Kiran didn’t know what he was walking into, and Luca sort of thought that he was going to get his ass kicked for springing this one on him. His only real hope was that Kiran would be so happy to see Ella that he forgot to be angry at Luca for doing this.

  He and Julian had considered telling Kiran ahead of time, but in the end, they’d been too desperate to get them back together. They couldn’t take the risk, they’d agreed, that Kiran would just flat out refuse to come.

  So as they walked together, Ella practically huddling into Julian as she walked beside him, Luca knew that they had taken a risk. It was a risk that he was willing to stand by, though, when he felt the hope which Ella exuded. Despite her fear, she was willing to try.

  That was a big deal. It made him respect the woman even more than he already did, which was saying something. She’d earned his unending adoration by how she’d taken care of Julian during their separation, and this was something that he could do for her.

  Still, Luca’s stomach clenched into little knots of nerves, and he could only imagine what Ella was feeling. The three of them walked together, toward where Kiran was (hopefully) waiting, with no idea of what was in store for him.

  “Whatever happens,” Julian said, as they neared the door that would bring them into the airport proper, the door that Kiran would, most likely, be waiting on the other side of for them, “We love you. Okay? Don’t forget that. You’ll always have us.”

  Ella had enough sass in her still to roll her eyes, and she even managed a bit of a grin. It looked sick and weak, but it was there, and it made Luca think that she would be okay, no matter what happened.

  “Great. Two gay guys are there for me,” she said, smirking. That smirk took any sting that Luca may have felt right out of the comment.

  “Hey. I’m not gay,” Luca said, faking an affront that he didn’t really feel. “It’s called bisexuality, lady. It’s a thing.”

  Though he had to admit, he hadn’t been attracted to anyone except for Julian in a long time.

  “Yeah, yeah. But you’re no use to me anyway,” Ella said, and the smile on her lips was a little bit more genuine. The fake teasing had let her pull herself together a little bit.

  “Okay,” Julian said, his face sober, but those intense, beautiful dark eyes of his practically whirling with his excitement. Luca understood completely, and so, he gathered, did Ella. They were all nervous, all hopeful, a bundle of emotions and feelings and sensations, linked in their hope for what the next five minutes would bring.

  “Ready,” Luca said, hugging Ella with one arm. She had started off as Julian’s best friend, yes, but now, she was important to both of them. Rarely had Luca had a friend as loyal as Ella.

  The other friend that he could put on that list was waiting, just through this door.

  “Ready,” Ella sighed, and together, the three of them reached out and pushed the door open.

  * * *

  Kiran was there. He didn’t look all that good, really. He’d lost weight that he could ill afford to lose, and his skin, under its golden tone, was quite pale. Still, he was there, even if it hurt Luca’s heart to see how much his best friend had changed.

  Kiran held a bunch of balloons, even, and he was smiling in a way that seemed sincere enough. Yes, he was tired, yes, he looked stressed out, but Luca could be very sure that his best friend was glad to see him.

  That smile faltered, though, as Kiran took in the rest of Luca’s party. Julian, he’d been expecting. Luca had kept Kiran in the loop, and other than the two men themselves, and, of course, Ella, Kiran had been the first one that Luca had told when he’d found Julian again.

  “Ella,” Kiran gasped, and he took a step backward, one that seemed entirely involuntary. And yet, it didn’t seem to Luca like Kiran was unhappy to see them, or unhappy to see Ella. Just deeply, deeply surprised. Like it wouldn’t have occurred to him, in a million years, that he might see her again at all.

  “Kiran,” Ella said, and Luca had never seen her face so openly imploring. “Kiran, I’m so sorry. I’ve wanted to say that to you for months.”

  Slowly, Kiran composed himself, and even more slowly, he nodded. Luca could almost swear that he saw lines of tension stretching between Ella and Kiran, but there was nothing much that he could do about it.

  This was between them.

  “It would seem,” Kiran said, his voice smooth and seemingly calm, despite the turmoil written all over his face, “That you and I have some talking to do.”

  Ella, who had taken a single step forward, looked back at Luca and Julian, her eyes plaintive and searching. Luca nodded, and beside him, he could feel Julian doing the same.

  “You’ve got this,” Julian murmured, and with that, Ella squared her shoulders and walked over to Kiran. The Japanese man looked at her, nodded briefly, and the two of them disappeared off into the crowds.

  But together. It was a small step, but it was an important one.

  It was only once they were gone that Julian began to laugh. Luca turned to him, one eyebrow raised, failing to
see just what was so funny about all of this.

  “We have no way to get into his house,” Julian pointed out. “We have nowhere to go, and no way to get there. He left too soon.”

  Luca paused, and then he started to laugh, too. It was terrible since they were essentially stranded in a city that neither of them was all that familiar with, but it was also very funny.

  “I guess we’re off to find a cab and a hotel room,” Julian managed, once they’d finally stopped chuckling enough to speak again.

  “Good,” Luca murmured, the warmth of their shared laughter still lingering through his whole body. “Because I feel like it’s been forever since I was last alone with you.”

  Julian’s smile brightened, and everything about him became seductive in a way that wasn’t at all about artifice, one that Julian didn’t even seem to be able to control. His stance changed, his body inclining just a little bit toward Luca, his eyes were hot and aroused, his lips parted with his slightly more rapid breathing.

  In short, everything about him seemed determined to make Luca hard, and it did. God, did it ever. Just like that, he was throbbing, pressed uncomfortably against his jeans, which were suddenly far too tight.

  “God, Julian,” Luca whispered, and then he grabbed him, right there, and kissed him, right in the middle of the incredibly busy airport.

  “Come on, or I’m going to need you right here and now,” Julian murmured. To Luca, that didn’t sound like much of a threat, but he wrapped his arm around his lover’s slender waist and tugged him out of the airport to hail the nearest cab.

  * * *

  They lay in bed together, naked, not a single stitch of clothing on either of them. It had taken them all of about twenty seconds to get that way. And yet to get to the hotel, to find one with a room available, to check in … all those simple tasks, which had been accomplished pretty quickly and easily, really, had seemed to take forever.