All I'll Ever Need

by Mildred Riley

  They had been sitting side by side at their twin desks. Elyse swung around, her elbows on her desk. “Now what are you two cookin’ up? Like I haven’t been through enough . . . losing my husband, having our child and now this. I don’t know if I can handle many more twists an’ turns in my life.” She sighed deeply.

  Emerald sprang from her chair, eager to comfort Elyse. She put her arms around her.

  “Oh honey, you’re stronger than you think. You will get through this!”

  “I’m trying to think, Em. How am I going to react if Holly does turn out to be Barry’s daughter?”

  Without waiting for an answer, she gave Emerald a one-sided grin.

  “You know, Emerald, I do have to confess that I’m impressed with what I’ve seen of her so far. She seems focused, ambitious, and if she is Barry’s daughter, he would be proud of her. And I do admire her because it’s obvious she’s had a difficult life.”

  “You have to give credit where credit is due, as the wise man said.”

  “Agreed.”

  “You do know that both Holly and Branch will be at Ace’s place tonight. You okay with that?” Em asked her.

  “I’ll be fine. Right now I want to know the truth. Then I’ll go from there.”

  “Whatever you decide . . .”

  “I know ultimately it’s my decision. My first responsibility is to my baby.”

  * * *

  Elyse decided she needed to go home to change before going to Ace’s place. She had been in her suit all day. Emerald would close up and pick her up and they would ride together.

  Driving to her condo, Elyse’s mind tumbled with thoughts of her situation.

  Why didn’t you tell me? she said in her silent conversation with her dead husband.

  I didn’t want you to know how imperfect I was, she could imagine him saying. You were always so special to me, and I didn’t want any imperfection to come into our lives.

  But you should have told me. We were supposed to share our lives, she thought.

  She drove into her parking space and went into a dark empty apartment. She felt so alone. There was no Sebastian to greet her, and the baby’s crib was empty. Then she saw the blinking light on her telephone. Quickly she punched the play button. Don’t let it be my baby, please!

  It was Jay. His voice boomed over the phone.

  “Haven’t been able to get a copy of Holly’s birth certificate. It’s sealed because her parents were not married when she was born. But, Elyse, we can do a DNA test which will help identify her father. Call me tomorrow. The whole procedure should not take long.

  Holly will be checked as well. She should be informed of that possibility.”

  * * *

  When Elyse got into Emerald’s car it was apparent that something had happened since she left the store.

  “What gives? You look like someone just handed you a million dollars!”

  Breathlessly, Elyse explained.

  “Jay Collins left me a message on my answering machine. Seems there was no marriage between Barry and the girl’s mother, and he said we can have a DNA test done.”

  “Not a blood test?”

  “No, Em. A blood test that matches blood types like A, B, or AB will only denote who the father is not. But now with DNA testing the characteristics of the genome can produce a positive match.”

  “That means you have something that can prove paternity.”

  “Right. I’m going to call first thing in the morning.”

  “Good idea.”

  “Em, I feel so relieved, and I’ve decided that I’m not going to fret over this until I know the truth . . . if Holly is Barry’s child. He was only eighteen, after all, and a college student, and if he made an error in judgment, he’s not the first person to do so.”

  “I agree.” Then she added, “Boy, you’re looking mighty sharp tonight.”

  “You don’t look so shabby yourself,” Elyse answered back, noting the black and white geometric print caftan type dress Emerald was wearing, possibly to hide a slightly stocky figure. She was also wearing several gold bracelets and large hoops in her ears. Elyse thought she looked like an African princess.

  “It’s a warm night, but I threw a jacket in the back-seat in case it turns chilly,” Emerald explained.

  Each of them was aware of the lighter mood between them, and they were happy to have their brief animosity at an end.

  “Everything’s goin’ to work out fine, you’ll see,” Emerald said as she drove from Mattapan Square, down Blue Hill Avenue toward Melnea Cass Boulevard, named for a well-loved activist in Boston. She turned into the area that would take them to Ace’s store near the Christian Scientist Mother Church. Luckily, they spotted a rare parking space and Emerald pulled into it with no difficulty.

  Ace greeted them at the front door, welcomed each with a kiss on the cheek.

  “Come on in,” he welcomed them. “it’s great to see you both.”

  Elyse thought he looked quite handsome in black slacks and a crisp white oxford shirt opened at the neck. He ushered them into his gallery where Holly and Branch were seated on the low bench in front of a wall painting. Greetings were exchanged, with Branch rising to his feet when the women entered.

  Elyse remarked to Ace, “I can’t believe what you’ve done to this place! It’s awesome, doesn’t look a bit like it did when I first came in and bought that beautiful vase. This room is something else! I like it. I like it very much.”

  Chapter 29

  The steel gray painted walls of Ace’s gallery provided a serene backdrop to the vibrant colors and textures of his artwork.

  High gloss African oil paintings formed a distinct flavor of the exotic native culture of the African nation Ace had served for two years.

  Some of his original lacquered vases were displayed on simple black wooden tables about the room. Two walls opposite each other were decorated with pieces of cloth with unusual patterns.

  The lighting in the room was from recessed lights in the stark-white ceiling, which was accented by white crown molding.

  Several native instruments, such as drums made of animal hides, sitars made from teak wood or gourds and other pieces handcrafted by Cameroon artisans, were placed on the floor about the room.

  Ace had also placed a low red leather bench in front of the wall of paintings so that viewers could sit and examine them more comfortably.

  There was a glass counter containing some smaller items, such as ceramics, vases, figurines, small African carved heads, jewelry, a thumb piano and reed pipes, all displayed on glass shelves.

  In the front of the room a bay window faced the street. Cream colored heavy drapes fell ceiling to floor, softening the starkness of the gray walls. Two small black leather chairs flanked a low round table, also black, on which rested a shiny brass bowl filled with a mixture of colorful coral and seashells.

  Elyse walked over to Branch and Holly. “It’s nice to see you both. How are you doing, and how’s school?”

  “Great,” both said in unison. Then Holly asked about the baby.

  “She’s doing great, too,” Elyse laughed. “Tonight she’s with my parents, her first sleepover.”

  The tense moment was over and everyone laughed. Branch excused himself, saying that Ace was about to show him his workspace in the basement.

  Standing with Ace, Emerald linked arms with the two men, leaving Holly and Elyse alone.

  Elyse sat down on the bench, patted the area beside her, indicating that Holly join her. She looked at the painting in front of them, a painting of Jacob Lawrence, one of several on the wall . . . It was call The Migration of the Negro, a casein tempera work with both vibrant and somber colors depicting a group of heavily burdened slaves fleeing an area. Dark birds flew over their heads, indicating their own migratory flight pattern.

  “We’ve come a long way from that,” Elyse said, nodding at the painting.

  “Yes we have, thank God,” Holly said.

  Elyse was acutely aware of
the tension she was feeling and sensed that her companion was feeling it, too. She turned to face her.

  “Holly, I feel that you and I should talk. Don’t you?”

  “Please,” Holly said in a self-effacing manner.

  “I don’t want to be a concern or a bother to you, don’t want to upset you or your family, but, Holly, I have already decided that you are my husband’s first daughter.”

  She was not prepared for the glistening tears she saw. Deeply touched by the sight of them, she took a deep breath, then continued.

  “It was my friend, Emerald, who told me that the minute she first saw you she had a feeling that you resembled someone, but didn’t know who. However, I didn’t see anything. Maybe it was denial, I don’t know, but the other night when I saw you holding my baby I could see your father.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes, I could. It shocked me because even though a long time back Barry had confessed to me that he had loved a girl and had almost married her, he never mentioned a child.”

  “He didn’t want me,” Holly blurted out, her face stormy with her deep-seated anger.

  “Knowing the man I loved, I believe he did. But at eighteen he knew he couldn’t care for you. Holly, may I see your hands?”

  Silently, with wonder in her eyes, Holly held out both hands, palms up.

  Elyse took them in both of her hands, turned them over to examine the nails.

  “These are your father’s hands,” she said softly.

  Holly stared open-mouthed.

  “Are you sure?”

  “No one else has these wide, stubby fingernails except your father, Missy and you.”

  “Oh, my God!”

  “Holly,” Elyse continued, “what else can you tell me about your birth?”

  Holly opened her handbag and handed Elyse a white business-sized envelope.

  “My gram showed me this when I was nine years old.”

  Elyse took the envelope and opened it slowly, aware that this moment could very well change her future. She sensed, too, the anxiety Holly was feeling as she watched her read the document in her hands.

  The only sound in the room came from the muffled voices of the three people in the basement workroom.

  Elyse read a copy of Holly’s birth certificate. The father’s name at the bottom jumped out at her. Father’s name: Barry Edward Marshall, Age: 18, Occupation: student. There it was. Her breath caught in her throat and quickly she read the other information about Baby Girl Francis. Mother’s name: Tiomara Francis, Age 16, Occupation: student.

  “Your parents were not married.” It was more a statement than a question.

  “No,” Holly said, matter-of-factly, “they were not. My father knew what to do!” Holly said. There was no mistaking the hostility in her voice towards the man she never knew. She handed Elyse a second white envelope.

  “What’s this?”

  “It’s what my father decided to do with me!”

  When she read the second document, in which Barry had given up rights and agreed that Baby Girl Francis be put up for adoption, Elyse understood the intense disappointment and pain that the girl had lived with all her life.

  She leaned forward to take Holly’s hand, aware of the hurt, the shame, the girl had endured.

  “Holly, you have to believe me, the man your father became, the man I married was not the boy who signed for your adoption. I know that with all my heart. If he could have provided for you, he would have. I could not have loved him the way I did if he had been otherwise. Holly, you’ve got to believe that!”

  Chapter 30

  “May I keep these papers?”

  “Yes. Branch suggested I make copies in case you wanted them. To tell you the truth, Mrs. Marshall . . .”

  “Please call me Elyse. Now, I don’t want you to worry, but my lawyer has suggested a DNA test should be done to be certain that you and Missy have the same father. I believe you do. You may not know it, Holly, but you are very much like your father in your personality. You have the same ambitious drive that he had. It’s amazing to me, but the more I am with you, the more I see Barry. You’re in the medical field. Did you know he was a pharmacist? Joined the National Guard so he could go to medical school. Oh, Holly, there’s so much about your father that I want you to know. So, will you take the DNA test?”

  Holly smiled for the first time.

  “Yes, ma’am . . . ah, Elyse.”

  “Good.”

  Then they heard the footsteps of the trio coming up the stairs.

  “Shall we tell them what we’ve decided?” she asked. “Don’t see why not,” Holly said.

  “Oh, my God, I’ve heard Barry use that expression so many times! Holly, it’s so surprising to me that you are so much like a man you never knew. Must be in the genes!”

  They both laughed.

  When Ace, Branch and Emerald re-entered the art gallery, they saw two smiling women standing side by side, facing them.

  Ever the observant one, Emerald spoke first. “So, what’s with you? What’s goin’ on?”

  “Holly and I have had a marvelous conversation. She’s agreed to a DNA test, but I want you all to know that I’m sure she’s Barry’s daughter. My stepdaughter!”

  “Hear, hear!” Ace said. “This calls for a celebration. Believe I’ve got some champagne around here just for such a momentous occasion!”

  He hugged Elyse, Branch and, with a wide grin, Holly. Then Emerald hugged both women.

  * * *

  As soon as Elyse was able to call Jay Collins, he told her he had already scheduled an appointment for the DNA testing to be done at a laboratory in Cambridge. “I do hope that two weeks from today will be convenient for you both,” he said to her.

  “Oh, Jay, of course it will be. I’ll let Holly know. We’ll go together. Thank you so much.”

  “No problem. I understand it might be six to eight weeks, perhaps longer, before you have the results.”

  Elyse did not respond at once. Jay said, “You still there, Elyse? Can you hear me?”

  “Oh yes, I can hear you, but, well, I was thinking. I am almost 100 percent sure that Holly Francis is Barry’s daughter. But, Jay, would you mind, you being one of Barry’s closest friends, if I brought her around? I’d like you to meet her.”

  “Anytime, feel free.”

  “You know, Jay, just as I’m going to tell Missy about her dad, I intend to do the same for his other daughter.”

  * * *

  “Holly, this is Elyse. I’d like to pick you up at the hospital so we can go to the lab for the DNA testing together.”

  Elyse thought Holly’s answer came over the phone rather quickly.

  “Oh, you don’t have to do that! I’ve already asked my student advisor for the day off and she has agreed, as long as I make up the day. Branch plans to come for me. We’ll meet you at the lab.”

  “Fine. You have the address?”

  “I do. See you there.”

  Elyse said goodbye and hung up the phone. She was disappointed because she had planned that the drive to Cambridge would give them some quality time, an opportunity to get to know one another, to bond, as it were.

  Then a small voice in the back of her mind said, How do you know that’s what she wants? Have you thought that perhaps she doesn’t wish to have a relationship with you? Why should she? You are a stranger. She has no past history with you. She had none with her father. Put yourself in her shoes. Would you want a stranger to lay claim to you? Change your life?

  Elyse sat at her desk, thinking about the call. Maybe I have come on too strong. I should try to understand her point of view. How would I feel in similar circumstances?

  * * *

  “Ace?” He looked up from his coffee, hearing the worry in Elyse’s voice.

  “Yes, what’s on your mind?”

  They were having a coffee break at her store. Ace had just happened to come by.

  “Holly.”

  “What about Holly?” he questioned.


  “You know, I called her before the tests, suggesting that I pick her up so that we could go to the DNA testing lab together.”

  “And.”

  “Well, I got the idea, from her tone of voice and what she said, that perhaps I’ve been coming on too strong. What do you think? Have I?”

  “I know you mean well, honey, but just think of it. You are a stranger to her, someone who unexpectedly entered into her life. She is probably as bewildered as you are about this sudden change.”

  “I thought my motives were clear. I just wanted to talk about her father . . .”

  “I understand that, Leese, because you loved him and you want her, somehow, to care for him as well.”

  “I feel it’s my responsibility to let her know what a wonderful man her father was,” Elyse persisted, her eyes moist. “I want her to see him as I saw him,” she added. A sudden revelation flooded her mind as she spoke to him. Clearly, she was beginning to depend on Ace.

  She realized that somehow, since Ace had come into her life, there had been unmistakable changes. When and how had that happened? Was it when Ace held her in his arms that morning, comforting her, assuring her that it would get better? Or was it his artistic talent that had brought the attractive ambiance to her bookshop? Could it be the strength with which he supported her during her pregnancy and birth of her dead husband’s child? Whatever it was, Ace Calhoun Brimmer was an important part of her life.

  She sensed, too, that somehow it was Ace who had been able to help her feel more confident about the way she was coping with the unusual, unexpected circumstances her life had imposed upon her. Her self-esteem was soaring. She felt more comfortable with the life decisions she had made. A huge part of that was due to the qualities Ace saw in her. And there was the warm, secure, serene feeling she felt whenever he was around. He seemed to belong in her life. Did she love him? She shook her head as she tossed the idea around in her mind.

  “So, Ace, how do you suggest I handle this situation with Holly? I’m not at all sure how to act.”

  He had a habit of drumming the fingers of his left hand on a table as he thought. She waited, realizing how much his response would mean to her.