Mended Heart

by Mary Manners

  The kitchen was bright and surprisingly neat. Double French doors opened onto a modest redwood deck. An oversized stainless steel grill was flanked by two sturdy Adirondack chairs. Jade imagined the grill got a lot of use while Shane watched Susie swing and slide on the wooden play set across the yard.

  Shane opened the refrigerator door and scanned well-stocked shelves. “I have Mountain Dew, apple juice, milk, coffee, and water,” he offered. “What would you like?”

  The aroma of hazelnut brewing in the coffeemaker on the counter beside the sink filled the room. “Coffee sounds good, thank you.”

  “I’m ready, Jade. Come tuck me in,” Susie called out.

  He turned from the open refrigerator to grin at her. “Right on time.”

  “Can you, um, show me...?” She dropped her purse on the counter.

  “Sure. Her room’s just down the hall. Take a right past the study. Follow the voice.”

  As if on cue, Susie hollered again. Shane’s laughter followed Jade down the hall. She found Susie curled up in a twin bed shaped like a castle, with a pale pink princess-embellished sheet tugged up to her chin.

  “I got three books.” She held them up for Jade’s inspection. “Daddy always reads me two picture books and one bible story. We’re on Noah now. Do you know Noah?”

  “Yes, I do.”

  “He had lots of animals, but not in a zoo. He put them on a big boat ’cause God told him to. He listened to God, just like you’re s’posed to. Then it rained and rained. Noah thought it was never gonna stop. And, guess what?”

  Jade eased onto the edge of the bed and slipped off pumps to tuck her feet beneath her. “What, honey?”

  “It did stop. And a ginormous rainbow came in the sky.” Susie threw her arms wide for emphasis. “God sent it. Do you know what it meant?”

  She brushed delicate blonde hair from Susie’s forehead. Her throat was tight, and the words came with great difficulty. Of course she knew the biblical symbolism of a rainbow, and the knowledge hit home. “Tell me.”

  “It was God’s promise to us. So now when it rains, we know it won’t keep on rainin’.” She fidgeted beneath the blankets. “My mama’s with God.” She paused. Her tiny fingers twined with Jade’s. “Hey, why are you cryin’? Did you know my mama?”

  Slowly, Jade shook her head.

  “It’s OK. Daddy cries sometimes, too, at night. He doesn’t want me to know and he thinks I’m sleepin’, but I’m not. So, I hear him, anyway.”

  Jade’s heart tore for Shane, and she realized with a jolt that she was beginning to love him despite all her efforts not to. He had suffered hurt and loss, just as she had. They were two peas in a snug little pod.

  “I got an idea!” Susie’s face lit up as she wiggled from under the blankets and sat up on her knees in the bed. “Maybe you could be my mama. I mean, Mama is my heaven mama now, since she’s with God. But maybe you could be my earth mama, like Jesus is my heaven daddy and Daddy’s my earth daddy.”

  “I...” Jade couldn’t speak past the lump in her throat. Her vision blurred and she brushed tears from her eyes with the sleeve of her blouse.

  Susie patted her shoulder. “It’s OK. You can think about it. Here.” She handed her I’ll Love You Forever. “This is my favorite book. Daddy always sings the song part. Will you sing it, too?”

  ****

  Shane stood just outside Susie’s doorway, listening as she reasoned with Jade, and his heart nearly ripped in two. Oh, the sweet innocence of a child. He stifled a sharp intake of breath as Jade began to murmur the words from a dog-eared copy of I’ll Love You Forever. Reid had asked him to get Susie the book right before she died, and during that last week she’d carefully penned a note in shaky script to Susie inside the front cover. Shane had memorized the words, and now he pictured Reid’s tear-streaked face:

  My sweet, precious baby,

  I love you more than the sun, the moon, and the stars. May angels watch over you all your days, and send you a new mama to help Uncle Shane kiss away your hurts.

  Be happy, my beautiful girl.

  Love,

  Mommy

  When Reid had handed him the book for safe-keeping, she looked at him with eyes full of heartbreak and the longing of shattered dreams and said, “I need you to love more than you hate now, Shane. For Susie’s sake, I need you to do this. Be strong for me, Shane. Be strong for Susie.”

  It had been a turning point, one that left him reeling. Reid was gone the next morning, her spirit finally, peacefully at rest. Shane had gathered the paperwork he’d signed just weeks before, a load of legalese that made him Susie’s guardian in the eyes of the law, and locked the file away for safe-keeping. He’d taken Susie home and even though at the time she was much too young to understand the words, he’d read the story to her nearly every night since. In the beginning all he could think of was losing Reid and the fact that he’d never see her again, never talk to her again, and he’d faltered through the book. The words had been gnarled with grief. But sharing the story had grown into a bittersweet, calming time for him that somehow gave him the strength to go on following the uncharted territory of hectic, lonely days. And as she grew old enough to understand the power of the words he read, Susie would slip her hand into his and murmur, “I’ll love you forever too, Daddy.” She’d kiss his forehead and pat his cheek gently, and in her pretty blue eyes he found Reid.

  He leaned quietly against the wall and craned his ear toward the doorway. Susie sighed contentedly as Jade sang softly of the mother’s undying love for her child. He swiped at his eyes and drew a deep breath. The words always choked him up, no matter how many times he heard them.

  He knew Susie wished for a mom, and he’d been alone on this journey far too many days. He longed for a woman to share his evenings with, to laugh with over Susie’s zany antics, and to cry with when he felt frustrated beyond the limits of patience. Realization rushed over him like Niagara Falls. Jade was the answer to his months and months of prayer. She loved Susie and he loved her.

  But could she ever grow to love him, too?

  Mended Heart

  7

  “Surprise!” A chorus of voices rang across the fellowship hall when Shane strode through the doorway.

  “What in the world...?” He froze mid-step, amazed by the rainbow of balloons and streamers blanketing the room. “What’s going on?”

  Susie ran to him and threw her arms around his waist. “Happy birthday, Daddy.”

  He patted the mop of blonde hair Jade had woven into neat braids and grinned. “I-I’m speechless.”

  “Finally!” Carly chimed in. “Speechless is good.”

  He scanned the room. “Wow, you’re all here...Tom, Lexie, Kim, Joe...” He went on, naming each of them before glancing down at his watch. “But how did you all get here so early? It’s barely nine in the morning, and summer vacation, no less.”

  “Jade helped us.” Carly grinned at him, her amber eyes shining. “She organized everything and let us in here to decorate.”

  “Mrs. D’atello, you’re here, too. And Mrs. McAllister!”

  Maggie lunged across the tile floor, nearly toppling the group like bowling pins. She paused at Shane’s feet and gazed up at him with soulful eyes. A pointy birthday hat sat askew between her ears, fastened by an elastic strap Susie had tucked beneath her jowls, and her tail swept great arcs across the floor.

  “Maggie, too?” He laughed and bent to scratch behind the dog’s ears. “I sure hope you’re behaving yourself, girl. Hide the appliances, everyone.”

  “Come look, Daddy. We made a cake!” Susie took his hand and tugged him toward a folding table Carly had covered with a pastel-blue table cloth and streamers. “I did the sprinkles and put the Barbie car on top, but Jade helped me spell ‘Happy Birthday.’ We had to bake it in Carly’s kitchen, ’cause you messed up plan A and Jade said going to Carly’s was plan B. And Carly brought some special plates. See, they say ‘Over the Hill’. That’s ’cause I told her you were
turning really old today. Twenty-eight is very, very old, you know.”

  Shane rolled his eyes and snatched a cube of colby-jack cheese from a tray near the end of the table. He added a Ritz cracker and popped both into his mouth. “So, that’s how you spent your girl time?”

  Jade laughed. “You threw a bit of a wrench into things when you showed up at my mom’s house, but Mrs. D’atello and Carly saved the day.”

  “Thank you. It’s amazing.” He took her hand, his gaze hopefully saying more to convey his appreciation than words could. “You’re amazing.”

  She felt the heat of blush rise up her neck. Beside them, Susie hopped up and down. “Hey, we get to eat birthday cake for breakfast. And there’s presents, too. Light the candles and make a wish, Daddy, so you can open your presents. Look, there’s even one from Maggie.”

  “Maggie?”

  “Yeah. It’s a new ’larm clock to replace the one she ate. She’s real sorry ’bout that. She told me so.”

  “Oh, she did?” He raised one eyebrow in disbelief. “And when did this conversation occur?”

  “Last night when I went to bed. She crawled under the covers with me and put her head on my pillow, and she told me with her eyes. They were real sad.”

  “Sad, huh?” Shane burst into laughter, and Jade joined him. The look on his face, one of utter disbelief and amusement, was priceless. “She gnawed on enough wire to light up this room. She was probably suffering from a belly ache.”

  “Speaking of light,” Carly tossed Jade a book of matches. “You light the candles, OK? I’m liable to burn my fingers off trying to ignite that many.”

  “Got it.”

  “Better run for the fire extinguisher with that graveyard full of flames,” Carly threw in. “And alert the fire department. It’s gotta be a hazard of some sort. There should be some law that puts a limit of, say, ten candles on a cake.”

  “Very funny.” Shane smirked. “You’re a real comedian.”

  “Thanks. It’s my not-so-hidden talent.”

  They all gathered around the folding table while Jade lit the birthday candles. Shane endured a raucous rendition of the Happy Birthday chorus, with a few extra verses thrown in by the youth group for good measure, before leaning toward flickering candles to make a heartfelt wish.

  Susie reached for his hand. “That’s an awful lot of candles, Daddy.” Her eyes were wide with wonder. “Do you think there are enough for two wishes?”

  “You bet.” He lifted Susie into his arms. “There’s enough for two really big wishes. You ready?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  He waited patiently while she squeezed her eyes shut and cast a silent wish, too. Then together they blew out the candles. A plume of smoke circled the air and the acrid scent of burning wax lingered.

  “Let’s eat this delicious cake.” Jade pulled off the Barbie four-wheeler and handed it to Susie so she could lick off the frosting. Then she cut the layers into generous portions. No one seemed to think it odd to eat cake for breakfast. They knew Shane was full of adventure. Carly handed out pieces topped with mountains of ice cream while Mrs. D’atello took Shane aside.

  “This card is from Carly and me.” She handed him a small envelope, her gray eyes warm with sincerity. “Thank you, Shane, for all you’ve done for Carly. The last few weeks...well, I’ve seen a change in her. It’s because of you...and Jade. I can’t tell you how much it means to me that you—” Her eyes filled with tears and her words were choppy with emotion. She shifted gears. “We’d like to have Susie over tonight so you can take Jade to dinner for a real birthday meal...if you’d like.” She gave him a knowing grin. “She’s a special woman, you know.”

  “Yes, she is. Thank you, Mrs. D’atello.” He held the card like a treasure. “I will definitely take you up on the offer. Six o’clock OK?”

  “It’s perfect.”

  Now, if he could only convince Jade to go with him.

  ****

  Jade threw open the closet doors and shuffled through her meager wardrobe. Now that she had settled into work at the church and was saving some cash, she needed to go clothes shopping. But caring for her mom and taking on extra tasks to help Shane out with the youth group seemed to devour all her time.

  He’d ambushed her when everyone left that morning, while she washed dishes in the church kitchen. She was up to her elbows in bubbly dishwater, and the apron she wore to protect her clothing was soaked.

  “Take five and let me finish up here.” He sidled up to the sink and shut off the water. The mug of freshly-brewed coffee he offered was doctored with a teaspoon of sugar and just a splash of cream, exactly the way she liked it. “Thanks again for the party. It’s hands down one of the nicest things anyone’s ever done for me.” He picked up a dish towel and dried the plate she handed him before tucking it into a cabinet.

  “I can’t take the credit. It was Susie’s idea. And Carly did a lot of the work, too.”

  “I see.” He nudged her away from the sink and plunged his hands into the dishwater to find the cake platter she’d been scrubbing. “Have you tried that new restaurant yet, the one on the riverfront?”

  “Benicio’s Café?”

  “Yeah.” He rinsed the platter and slid it onto the counter, and then reached for the cake server. “I’ve heard the food is good.”

  “It looks expensive.”

  “Not very. I’d like to take you tonight, for my birthday. Mrs. D’atello offered to watch Susie—with Carly’s help, of course.”

  Jade sipped the delicious coffee he’d made her and lifted an eyebrow. “You’ve already planned this out, I see?” She watched with fascination as he rinsed silverware and glasses. Why did it surprise her so that he knew his way around the kitchen sink? She supposed this was a nightly ritual with a five-year-old to feed.

  “I don’t like leaving things to chance.” His sea-blue eyes were playful, yet sincere. He pulled the drain stop from the sink and wiped his hands on the towel as bubbles disappeared into the pipe. Jade drew her gaze away and focused on Maggie, who’d finished scouting for crumbs and had curled up beneath the windows overlooking the parking lot below.

  “Doesn’t sound like the Shane I used to know.”

  “I keep trying to tell you that, but you don’t seem to listen.”

  “I’m listening now. And I’d like that. I mean...dinner with you.”

  “Great.” He grinned like a kid who’d just received a special gift on Christmas morning. “I’ll drop Susie at Carly’s and swing by to pick you up at about six-fifteen.”

  “That’s perfect.” She set down the coffee mug she’d drained and reached for a sponge to wipe puddles of water from the counter around the sink. “Shane?”

  “Hmmm?” He closed the silverware drawer with a hip and leaned against the wall to cross his arms. Biceps bulged like firm grapefruit and Jade drew her eyes away. She focused on Maggie.

  “Happy birthday, and thank you for the coffee. It’s much better in a mug than splashed across your shirt.”

  He laughed softly. “My pleasure.”

  Jade sighed at the memory and turned her attention back to the sparse closet. Focus. You need to find something to wear, and quick. Shane will be here in twenty minutes and you’re nowhere near being ready.

  She didn’t know why it mattered so, but she wanted to look her best tonight. Maybe it was the memories of worn jeans and ratty vintage t-shirts, of feeling like she never measured up with Shane and his high school crowd.

  But this wasn’t high school anymore, and Shane had changed...somehow.

  So had she. Could he see that? Did he know?

  “Jade?” Mama’s voice rang out. She shuffled down the hall in slippered feet and rapped lightly on the door. “May I come in?”

  Jade drew the sash tighter on her baby-blue terrycloth robe. “Sure, Mama. The door’s unlocked.”

  Her mother peeked in. “I have something for you.”

  “Tell me what the doctor said, first.” Jade motioned her into th
e room. “Your appointment took longer than I expected. Did Dr. McConnell run more tests?”

  “Pish posh.” She brushed the question off with the wave of a mottled hand. “Forget about that for now.” She presented Jade with a hanger draped in a cheerful yellow garment bag. “I saw this in the window of that little boutique I pass on my way to the doctor’s office, and I thought it would look perfect on you. I hope you like it.”

  “What is it?” She turned the garment bag this way and that.

  “Take a look, silly.”

  She stripped the plastic back to unveil a sleek summer-green sundress. “Oh, Mama, it’s beautiful!”

  “I thought the color would go well with your hair and eyes.” Indeed, the dress was the perfect shade of green, delicate and flowing. “You have beautiful hair, Jade. You take after your grandma—your father’s mother. I don’t think I’ve ever told you that.”

  “No, Mama, you haven’t. Thank you.”

  “She died when you were just a baby.” She handed over a shoebox. “Try these sandals on, too. The saleslady said they were made for that dress, and I imagine she’s right.”

  Jade lifted the lid on the box and gasped. “Oh, they’re pretty!” The heels were just the right height to be dressy but still comfortable, and the style was strappy and elegant. “Thank you, Mama. But how did you know?”

  Mrs. McAllister winked and tapped the side of her grizzled head with a bony index finger. “A mother has her ways. You’ll learn that one day.”

  Jade flew to the mirror, dress and shoes in hand, and drank in her reflection. “I’ll try them on.”

  She held the dress against her slender frame and spun before the mirror. Her long, cinnamon hair fanned out in a wavy arc around her shoulders and shone beneath the light.

  “You’ll look lovely in that.” Mama’s eyes were bright with love. “The sight of you will knock Shane right out of his shoes.”