Essence

by A. L. Waddington

  “Because I do.” Jenna bounced out of the room to the front room.

  I caved and followed her only to find her perched over the back of the couch, peeking through the drapes.

  “Sure you don’t want to sit out on the front porch or perhaps the lawn?”

  “I would if it wouldn’t look too obvious.”

  “If my mother catches you in here, you’re going to wish you had chosen the porch or lawn,” I stated sternly.

  Our front living room, or the parlor as my mother liked to call it, was her favorite room in the house. We rarely used it except for special occasions.

  Our house was built shortly before the Civil War and was huge, old, and drafty. It was whitewashed with black shutters and a grand porch that wrapped around the front and sides of the home. My parents had bought it when my mother was pregnant with me. It was a great place to grow up, especially to play hide-and-seek. There were three floors plus a full basement.

  Out back stood a detached, three-car garage that was apparently servants’ quarters at one time. It had been converted into a garage long before we ever bought the house. There had been an old stable/shack in the opposite corner of the backyard where the yard supplies, carriages, and horses were housed but it had burned down sometime in the 1930s, or so I was told.

  The main floor of the home was open and airy, and it was the kind of house with old-style charm; I loved it. My mother’s room was professionally decorated with timepiece antiques from when the house was built. The outside wall was home to a large fireplace that still had its original mantel. It was the one piece mother would not budge on remodeling. It was nicked, had dated initials from the original owners, and nails to hang up stockings at Christmas. Somehow, it made the room feel like home. Her grand piano in the front corner sat unused since her failed attempt to talk me into taking lessons when I was a child.

  I was staring at the piano when Jenna turned back to the window to peek back out the drapes. “Your mom went shopping about an hour ago.”

  I walked over and sat down beside her, pulling back the curtain a little to have a look. I couldn’t see anything but the moving truck parked in the driveway and men unloading the truck.

  Jenna let go of the drapes. “I still haven’t seen the new people.”

  “What does it matter? Why are you so curious?”

  “ ‘Cause nothing ever happens around here. This is exciting.”

  “You realize that it’s probably some couple with a bunch of little kids who will be running around screaming and riding their bikes in the street so we’ll have to watch out for them. Yeah. It’ll be so exciting.”

  “Yeah. You’re probably right.” She sighed. “It’s just so boring around here.”

  “How can anything be boring with you around, waking people up?” I playfully smacked her again on the arm.

  Just then, Kyle walked through the front door. He never knocked. Neither did Jenna. Of course, I didn’t knock at their houses either.

  He laughed at us perched behind the drapery. “What’s going on? Already spying on the new neighbors I see.”

  “Trying to, but I can’t see because the front yards are too big and there’s too many trees.” Jenna glared.

  Kyle and I laughed at her.

  “I’m sure we’ll find out soon enough who they are. Something like this is not going to stay quiet too long in this neighborhood.” He came over and sat down in the armchair. “I already heard my mom tell Dad this morning that the realtor who’s a friend of hers said the husband is a lawyer and the wife is a novelist. They have three kids. Two are still back east. The other is in our grade.” He sat back with a satisfied smirk.

  “Really? I wonder.” Jenna looked lost in thought.

  “What?” It was unsettling to imagine what could possibly be going on in that head of hers. Nothing good usually came out of her meddling.

  “I was just thinking…”

  That could be dangerous.

  Kyle stood back up. “Tell ya what. Why don’t we shoot some hoops?”

  “Sounds good.” I stood up and pulled Jenna’s arm.

  The three of us went out to the driveway and started shooting around. Kyle, despite being athletically built, was definitely not a basketball player and fumbled the ball several times. Jenna and I had no problem stealing the ball from him or blocking his shots.

  We were enjoying ourselves and acting stupid when a voice spoke up behind us.

  “Excuse me. Mind if I join?”

  I took in an unintentional deep breath when I caught sight of where the voice came from.

  He was over six feet with broad shoulders and a muscular stature. His dark, wavy brown hair was glistening in the afternoon sun, giving it almost copper-colored highlights; but the most striking feature were his piercing, green eyes. I didn’t believe I’d ever seen eyes so bright and dark at the same time.

  The mysterious person stood near the birch tree on the edge of the flower garden, looking somewhat uncomfortable; yet there was an air of confidence about him. Kyle walked over to him and extended his hand.

  “Sure. Glad to even the odds.” Kyle smiled, breathing heavily. “They’re killing me. Kyle Clausen.” Kyle shook hands with the gorgeous stranger.

  “Jackson Chandler. We just bought the house across the street.” He slowly walked onto the asphalt driveway as Kyle tossed him the basketball.

  “This is my girlfriend, Jenna Burk. She lives next door.” Kyle pointed to Jenna’s house. “And this is Jocelyn Timmons. This is her place. I live over there.” Kyle nodded in the direction of his home.

  “Nice to meet you both.” Jackson smiled at Jenna and me.

  “You too.” Jenna walked over and shook his hand while I remained rooted where I stood.

  His presence bothered me a great deal. I couldn’t explain it, but I could feel it, like I’d seen him before even though I was positive I hadn’t. I felt like I knew him.

  Jackson smiled in my direction and suddenly a wave passed over me, making me very lightheaded and dizzy. I took a step back, feeling nauseous, and leaned against the basketball goal post. My breathing quickened. I could hear the three of them speaking, but the sounds were muffled like there was cotton in my ears.

  I slowly slid down the post and sat on the grass, wrapping my arms around my knees, and closed my eyes, resting my head down upon them, trying to block out the world around me. My breathing slowed, but the nausea and lightheadedness continued.

  “Are you all right?” It was Jenna’s voice.

  I nodded as best I could.

  “Are you going to get sick?”

  I shook my head and looked at her kneeling beside me.

  “Guess I’m tired from practice this morning.” My voice sounded foreign in my ears.

  Her face was full of concern. “Are you sure? Do you want me to get you anything? Some water?”

  “Yeah. Some water would be great. I can get it. Just give me a hand.”

  I held out my hand and she helped me to my feet. As I regained my balance, I noticed that Kyle and Jackson were hovering right behind Jenna.

  “You okay?” Kyle asked.

  I nodded at him, purposely avoiding looking at Jackson.

  I headed into the house. “I’m fine. Just need some water.”

  Jenna followed, and the boys began shooting hoops again.

  “What’s wrong?” Jenna asked once inside the kitchen.

  I got some water from the fridge door and took a long drink.

  “Nothing. I just got lightheaded for a second. I’m probably just worn out.”

  Jenna eyed me suspiciously with her head cocked to the side. “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah. I’m fine. Really.” I nodded again.

  “So, what do you want to do tonight?” She perched herself up on a bar stool.

  “I don’t care. I don’t have any plans. Aren’t you and Kyle doing something?”

  “Nothing concrete. Why don’t we call Hill, Cody, Zak and Caitlyn and see if they want to w
atch a movie or something? Just hang out. Nothing special.” Jenna shrugged.

  I leaned my head against the cool side of the fridge and started to feel a little better. “All right.” I continued sipping on my water. The lightheadedness, as well as the nausea, was almost completely gone.

  “You go lie down for a while. I’ll make some phone calls.”

  I nodded as Jenna bounced back out the back door while I stayed in the kitchen long enough to pour a third glass of water and sat down at the breakfast bar, wondering what had come over me so quickly. I had never experienced anything like that in my life. There was a thin layer of sweat across my brow that I wasn’t sure was from the episode or the basketball. I wiped my forehead with the back of my sleeve and rested my head on the counter. The nausea began to subside a little, and the cool counter felt welcoming on my face. I just wanted to lie there and not move. Maybe I was getting the flu or something.

  A few minutes later, my father arrived in the kitchen to scrounge for a snack. He was sweaty and dusty from cleaning out the garage most of the day.

  “Hey.” He tapped me on the shoulder. “You okay?”

  I looked up at his face and gave him the best smile I could muster.

  “Yeah. Just tired from practice,” I replied, sliding off the stool.

  He stood there with a box of Wheat Thins in one hand and a Diet Coke in the other and nodded as he munched on some crackers.

  “Hey, Dad, do you care if I have some friends over tonight just to hang out and watch movies in the basement?”

  Our basement had become a popular hangout in the last several years. My parents had remodeled it years ago, turning it into a recreation room with a large television, oversized sofas, a pool table and a bar in the corner.

  It seems everyone enjoyed loitering around our place mainly because our parents aren’t typically as bad as others in letting us just hang out and be stupid. They check on us, but not that often and don’t come unglued about couples snuggling during a movie, although they do the occasional hand check, which has become a running joke now within our group.

  “Whatever,” he muttered and waved, leaving me alone for half a second.

  “Cool. Who’s coming over?” Ethan, my younger brother, entered the kitchen from the other entrance. His dark, blonde hair was a mess and in dire need of a trim.

  Ethan was only a year behind me in school, a fact I truly hated sometimes. He was also on the football team and constantly wanted to hang out with my friends and me.

  “Just the usual.” I turned toward him. “What are your plans?”

  “Not much. Movies maybe. Mariah and I were talking about doing something with Haley and Corbin. Who knows? He shrugged his shoulders and reached into the fridge. “Did you meet the new guy across the street? Seems like a nice enough guy. He’s out in the driveway with Kyle, shootin’ hoops.”

  “Yeah. I was out there a little while ago. I really didn’t get the chance to talk to him.”

  “I guess they’re from Boston.”

  “Boston?”

  “That’s what he told me just a minute ago. He also asked me about the team. Guess he played wide receiver at his old school. That should make Cody happy.” Ethan laughed and pulled out of the fridge with a Coke in one hand and a chicken leg in the other. He took a big bite of the chicken and grinned at me.

  “You’re disgusting.” I slapped him on the shoulder. “Get a plate, you pig.”

  Ethan held the chicken in his teeth and grabbed the half gallon of cookie dough ice cream out of the freezer, placing it on the breakfast bar. I rolled my eyes at him and left the kitchen. He always ate like a pig, but it got a lot worse during football season when he was training hard. His metabolism raced, and he ate nonstop.

  I retreated to my room to change and fix my hair before my friends arrived. The episode in the driveway was now becoming a faded memory. I actually felt silly about the whole thing. What an impression I must have made on the new guy. It was probably just caused by all the long hours of practice and the late nights I’d been up studying.

  ***

  Jenna arrived shortly before Caitlyn, Cody, Zak, and Hilary; and the six of us headed downstairs, where my mother had left out chips and pizza rolls and stocked the bar fridge with sodas. We all got comfortable lounging on the oversized sofas, chatting about school, when Mariah, Haley, Corbin, and Ethan came down the stairs.

  I looked up, giving Ethan a dirty look; but the four of them made themselves comfortable and joined in on the conversation. None of my friends really minded my brother; and our friendships did overlap but it made boundaries blurred, secrets and privacy a joke.

  The guys decided that we were going to watch the first Fantastic Four movie. All of them were in love with Jessica Alba.

  About an hour into the movie, I heard footsteps on the stairs. I was curled up in the corner of the sofa with my arms wrapped around a pillow and covered by a throw blanket enjoying the movie when Jenna, who was sitting next to me, smiled as Kyle came into view. Turning, I realized that Jackson was with him and immediately, the same nausea and lightheadedness I had experienced earlier swept over me. I closed my eyes, regretting the pizza rolls I had just eaten. Then Kyle and Jackson, much to my horror, squeezed in between Jenna and me on the couch. Kyle made brief introductions to everyone while my eyes remained closed. I tried hard to give the impression that I had fallen asleep. I didn’t want to move. I tried to convince myself that if I remained still with my eyes closed I would not vomit all over Jackson. I just had to pretend that this beautiful creature was not only inches from me, so close I could barely move my hand and be touching him. I struggled to breathe.

  I heard Caitlyn ask after some time had lapsed, “When did Jocelyn fall asleep?”

  “She wasn’t feeling well earlier. I think she’s just worn out,” Jenna replied.

  “I hope that someday I might actually get to meet her,” Jackson said.

  “She’s really nice. Honestly.” Hilary came to my defense. “She’s just a little shy sometimes.”

  “Shy?” Ethan challenged. “My sister? Hardly. She’s never shy when she’s yelling at me!” He laughed.

  “That’s only because you’re a constant pain in her ass,” Jenna piped back.

  I knew she was giving him her smart-ass grin and I had to fight not to smile myself. Finally, I heard everyone say their good nights and climb back up the stairs. I had no idea what time it was. I had kept up my sleeping impression for the entire evening since the nausea and dizziness would not subside.

  When I was sure that the basement had emptied, I was glad to finally be alone. I slowly opened my eyes and stretched out my cramped legs. The lights had all been turned off except for the small light over the bar. I decided I would be much more comfortable in my own bed and climbed up the stairs. But as I opened the basement door, standing there in my kitchen was Jenna, Kyle, Ethan, and Jackson. I froze and tried to act casual.

  “Hey sleepyhead. Did you realize we left you?” Ethan smiled over at me.

  “Yeah.” I covered my mouth, pretending to give a big yawn. “I think I’m going to head to bed. See you all tomorrow.”

  I moved a little faster than I intended, but the uneasy sick feeling had returned full force. Strangely though, by the time I reached the second floor the feeling had completely subsided.

  I crawled under my covers and buried my face in my pillows, feeling dumbstruck by what had occurred. Am I coming down with something? Or is it just pure exhaustion? I had never experienced something so powerful in my life. How something could sweep over me so quickly but then leave just as fast left me with the oddest feeling ever. Maybe I just need to drink some more orange juice in the morning to boost up my immune system for a few days.

  My mind continued whirling with various possible explanations and scenarios until I finally drifted into deep, dreamless sleep.

  CHAPTER 2

  Sunday, October 13, 1878

  I FELT A SUNBEAM flowing through the lace curtain on
my windows and breaking through the shield of my sheer canopy to warm my face. I smiled to myself and stretched, thinking about seeing Jackson soon. The light felt refreshing on my skin and filled me with the last heat of the summer before autumn took its full hold.

  Mimi was beside me as soon as I opened my eyes, smiling down at me. “Good mornin,’ Miss Jocelyn. Did ya sleep well?”

  I nodded and pulled myself up on my pillows. My down, ivory, lace quilt billowed out around me, lying gracefully upon my bed.

  “Morning, Mimi. Is everyone already up?” I watched her for a moment while she laid out my things for the day.

  “Yes, ma’am.” Mimi nodded. “Mr. and Mrs. Timmons are alreada eaten in da’ dinin’ room, and Dr. William was headin’ tha’ way when I’s come up.”

  I climbed out of bed and walked over to the water basin to wash my face and brush my teeth. The fresh water was chilly and instantly brought me back to life after my deep slumber. Mimi helped me into my corset, and I held my breath as she tied me up. I truly hated this torture device. At least that’s what it felt like to me.

  I climbed into my dark, cornflower blue gown with the ivory lace around the cuffs and neckline. The weight of it covered me like a thick blanket as it billowed out around me. I spun around in front of the full-length mirror, smoothing out the front of my heavy gown. The corset was so tight it made it a little difficult to breathe deeply, but it made the dress so flattering.

  Once at the vanity, Mimi began brushing out my long, thick, wavy reddish-brown hair. The sunlight filled my room, making my hair look almost red. It always looked red in the sun. It was my pride and joy, and Mimi always took such loving care of it. She was very graceful despite her years.

  Mimi had been with my family for as long as I could remember. She told me once that she had taken care of my mother’s family before she married my father and then came to live with them after their wedding. She was likely the oldest of all our servants except for perhaps her husband, Eddie. He and the others answered to her and Mother. But Mimi was clearly the favorite and most loved by me and all four of my older brothers. She loved us all; but my being the only female child in the house, she was always the one who dressed me and fixed my hair. However, now that I am turning eighteen in less than two weeks and finishing up my studies at school, she is more of a confidant than anything else.