Off Your Rocker?

by K E Osborn

  “I love you, Colt,” I say and he closes his eyes briefly.

  “Lia, I—”

  “I just want you to know that the way I acted was out of jealousy because I’m so in with love you, and it’s okay, you don’t have to say it back. I know it’s hard for you to say and I understand completely.”

  His forehead meets mine. “You know how I feel though, right?” he asks looking concerned.

  I smile up at him. “Until the end of time,” I say making him smile.

  “Exactly.”

  “Colt, seriously, c’mon man,” Dingo calls out.

  Colt wraps his arm around my shoulder pulling me to his side and we walk back into the penthouse suite.

  The flight from Chicago to Sydney, Australia was long and drawn out, just over nineteen hours and thank God we had a bed we could sleep in. On the jet, past the office there are some bedrooms which I had no idea were there, but then again I guess I’ve never looked down in that area. The interview went well for Rolling Stone magazine and the band picture made it to the cover. I didn’t look inside at the photos of Colt, because I knew they’d bring back memories of watching him with another woman, and I can’t bring myself to do that.

  Colt walks into our suite from the penthouse suite next door, looking intently at a brochure.

  “Hey baby, how was the meeting with Rob?” I ask sifting through my suitcase trying to find something to wear out to dinner.

  “Yeah good. He’s really impressed with your song, and the guys and I came up with the backing track for it. It sounds really great. I think it’ll do really well in the charts,” he replies turning a page in the brochure he’s still holding.

  “Well for starters it’s not my song, you wrote it not me, but I’m so proud of you,” I say while throwing a bunch of clothes on the floor. He looks up from the brochure and smirks at me.

  “Um... why are you suddenly turning into a teenager and throwing your clothes all over our room? Has my Little Bean sprouted into a full on rock chick?” he asks with a cheeky look on his face.

  I huff and sit on the edge of the bed. “I’ve nothing to wear,” I say flopping backwards onto the mattress.

  Colt chuckles. “Baby you have heaps of clothes here. You have more than the other girls.”

  I huff and fold my arms over my chest. “I know, but I’m sick of wearing the same old boring shit all the time.”

  Colt lays down on the bed next to me. “Okay, first of all, you swore and you know what that does to me. Secondly, you’re mean because you know what swearing does to me and we have no time for me to fuck your brains out ‘cause we have to go to this stupid dinner. And thirdly after Sydney we’re going to Melbourne. We are there for a few days, so I think you and Anna should go shopping. Have a girl’s day. I was just reading this brochure about Melbourne that there’s a street that is full of little boutiques and shit for chicks. Chapel Street or something I think it’s called. I can get our driver to take you girls there, with some security of course, and you can buy yourself some new clothes. You can buy me some too if you want,” he says turning on his side to face me.

  “I know your father has limited your monthly allocation to your account and I don’t want you to worry. I’ll give you my credit card and you can get whatever you want. I don’t care how much you buy, or how much you spend, just have fun, you deserve it. You’ve given me so much. It’s time for me to give back to you.”

  I smile and roll on my side to face him feeling pure happiness. “You would really do that for me?”

  “Of course I would, what’s the point of having money if I can’t spend it on those who I truly care about?” I bite my bottom lip and run my finger along his jaw, he smiles and I lean in to kiss him, but he pulls away abruptly and sighs shaking his head.

  “If you start something I won’t be able to stop. C’mon we can’t be late, we’re meeting Molly Meldrum for an interview after dinner,” he states smiling at me and getting up from the bed. He bends down and picks up my long black dress from the floor, and lays it on the bed next to me.

  “Wear this,” he says raising his eyebrows up and down and then walks into the en-suite.

  I shake my head and giggle at his demand, but do as he says. I get dressed and do my hair and make-up and make our way to dinner.

  I slowly get up from the bed and move to the en-suite after a great night out with the band and Molly Meldrum. Colt’s fast asleep as I tiptoe around him. I shut the door to the en-suite and turn on the light while I make my way to use the loo. I casually sit down on the toilet, my mind in a sleepy fog, when I suddenly realise that I haven’t had my period at all this month. Now I’m completely awake. My heart starts to race as I try to remember the date in my head. I gasp as I work it out.

  I’m late.

  Shit!

  Shit! Shit! Shit!

  I finish on the loo and make my way to the basin and wash my now flaming hot face with cool water. I stare at myself in the mirror and look down resting my hand on my flat stomach. What the hell am I going to do if I’m… pregnant.

  Holy fuck!

  Fucking, fuck, fuck!

  Colt won’t even admit that he loves me. Telling him he might be a father may just be the push he needs to send him away from me for good. I sit down on the edge of the bathtub, the cold porcelain against my bare arse sends a slight chill up my spine. I lean down resting my elbows on my knees with my head in my hands. I don’t know how I feel. I guess the best thing to do would be to find out for sure, before I even tell Colt what I’m thinking might be happening to me, to us. The door of the en-suite opens making me look up and Colt’s standing there in all his naked glory squinting as the light is too bright for him.

  “Baby, you okay?” he asks walking in and sitting on the tub next to me.

  I nod trying to hide my tears. “Yeah, I’m fine, just got a little… hot is all. I’m okay go back to bed,” I reply kissing him on his cheek. He rests his hand on my knee and exhales loudly.

  “Why don’t you come with me? I want your body all over mine,” he says with a smirk.

  I smile at him. Even in a time of crisis, he can calm me without even knowing I needed calming. I should tell him, but I’m terrified he’ll run. I can’t tell him. I have to find out for myself first.

  “I’ll be in, in a minute,” I say. He smiles and stands up, then walks back into the bedroom. I exhale loudly as a wave of nervousness hits me. I swallow a lump in my throat and splash my face with cold water, again. I towel dry and then head back into the bedroom to a waiting Colt. I make my way into the bed and snuggle into his side. He takes hold of my knee and pulls my leg over his, so I’m practically on top of him.

  “Colt.”

  “Yeah?”

  “I love you,” I say fighting back the tears.

  He takes hold of my wrist as my hand splays out over his chest. He kisses my head and I cuddle into his side even closer. Who knows, this could be the last night I get to spend with the man I truly love.

  Colt quickly falls back asleep as I lie awake thinking of all the possible scenarios of what could happen, if I am pregnant.

  What would Daddy think?

  Shit!

  I’ve only been with Colt for three and a half months and I might already be knocked up? That’s not going to go down well at all. I have no idea how this could even be possible, I’m on the pill for God’s sake. Isn’t that supposed to be one hundred percent pregnancy safe? My eyes are wide open, staring into the blackness of the room as I inwardly panic until the early hours of the morning.

  Colt is watching me like a hawk. He knows something’s up, but I’m trying my best to keep my little secret under wraps. We board the jet destined for Melbourne. Colt takes my hand and drags me to our usual seats in the back of the jet. I sit down and he looks at me with his furrowed brows.

  “Lia, how long are you going to keep me in the dark?” he asks quietly while he sits down and runs his hand through his hair.

  I look at him with my eyebrow
s furrowed. “What do you mean?”

  “I know what’s going on, Lia. I’m not stupid. Why are you keeping it from me? You can talk to me you know?” he questions and I tense up. He knows that I’m late? How the hell could he possibly know that?

  “Keeping what from you?”

  “You’re still angry at me for the photo shoot, right? That’s why you’re moping around like a lost puppy.” I can’t help it as a flood of relief washes over me.

  Thank God!

  I decide to let him think that, it’s easier than him finding out the alternative.

  “I’m sorry. I know you were thinking about me, but the image is still in my head and—”

  “Lia, I’m with you. I only want you. No one else, especially not some snobby American bird who’s only after me for my fame. It’s only you, baby,” he says taking my hand in his and kissing my knuckles. I nod, and for once I’m not nervous about flying on the jet. My nerves of Colt leaving me when he finds out are far out-weighing the jet fear tenfold.

  We arrive in Melbourne not too long after we leave Sydney, a little under an hour and a half later. We head straight to the Melbourne Cricket Ground where the band’s playing tonight. The guys are on stage doing sound checks and walking through all the stuff that they normally do before a show. Anna and I sit at the back of the stage chatting, but I feel off. I don’t know whether it’s from the undeniable stress I’m feeling about being late or whether it’s because my body is actually changing, but either way Anna knows something is up.

  “Earth to Lia... have you even been listening to me?” Anna asks bringing me back into the moment.

  “Sorry, I was miles away.”

  “I know, you’ve been weird ever since the photo shoot. Is it still playing on your mind?”

  I exhale and rub my temple looking at her. She smiles at me sympathetically and takes my hand in hers.

  “Lia, tell me, c’mon. Woman to woman. What’s going on in that head of yours?”

  I decide to tell her. She knows Colt so well and she might be able to help with this… situation. “I think I’m pregnant, Anna,” I say closing my eyes and dropping my chin to my chest. It was harder to say than I thought it’d be. There’s nothing, no noise or comment coming from Anna. So I open one eye to look at her. She’s staring at me, eyes wide and her mouth open in an O shape. She’s as shocked as I am about the whole thing. I exhale and rest my head in my hands. Her hand rubs my back as a new wave of panic hits me.

  “Does he know?” she asks in the quietest voice I’ve ever heard, less than a whisper. I shake my head and look up at her with tears in my eyes.

  “No. He’s going to leave me isn’t he?” I ask her face is etched with concern.

  “Lia, I… wait you said think. Does that mean you don’t know for sure?”

  I nod. “Yeah, I’m late, but I haven’t taken a test yet. I’m too scared and I only realised last night, and my head has been in a spin ever since.”

  She nods in acknowledgement and I can see her thinking hard about something. “Okay, can you wait till tomorrow to find out? We have our shopping trip and we can buy a test then, and I’ll be there when you take it. It’ll be fine, Lia. I’ll be here with you every step of the way,” she says taking me into an embrace. I choke back the tears threatening to fall.

  “I don’t ever want to take the test, if I do that, then this could really be happening.”

  “Yeah, I know, but you have to find out, Lia. Don’t worry about Colt, I’ll take care of him if I need to. We’ll go to the shops straight after breakfast and get it over with, okay?” she asks making me feel sick to my stomach.

  “I’d rather not, so then I don’t have to deal with the fall-out,” I say looking up to see Colt walking toward me with his brows furrowed.

  Fuck!

  “The fall-out from what, Lia?” he asks, making me gasp. I look at Anna with my eyes wide, fear and panic gripping every fiber of my being.

  “Lia’s father rang and was telling her to go back to England. She didn’t want to tell you because she knew it would upset you and that you’d probably want to call her father and abuse him.”

  Oh my God, thank you Anna!

  I nod my head in agreement and Colt squats down in front of me. “Baby, I’m not going to abuse your father. As much as I’d like for him to leave us alone, I know he’s only worried about you. Don’t worry about him. The tour goes on a break soon so we can head back to England and he can see you then. In the meantime are you ready to rock out tonight?” he asks with a giant smile that calms my nerves.

  “Yep, can’t wait,” I say as he stands up looking at me with a soft look on his face.

  “Colter!” Sia calls out making us all look over at her. She signals for him to go over by waving her hand about. He looks down at me and smiles and then jogs off toward Sia and Rob. I slump my shoulders in relief that he believed Anna. I turn to her and wrap my arms around her tightly.

  “What would I do without you, Anna?”

  “Probably fall apart,” she chuckles and lets me go.

  The show was just as amazing as all the others. Colt really knows how to work the crowd, and they adore him. It’s not hard to see why he’s so talented in every department possible, looks, voice, and charisma. The guy’s got it all.

  We walk into the penthouse suite and Dragon’s Lair are already there. I shake my head and roll my eyes watching the half-naked girls swarming around Jarred. Colt lets out a small chuckle at my disapproval and walks me to the lounge.

  “You wanna beer?”

  I nod, and he walks toward the fridge when I remember. “Colt, actually can I have a Coke instead?” I ask and he raises an eyebrow.

  He walks back to me. “You okay?” he asks, his voice etched with concern.

  I smile at him and nod. “Yeah, I’m fine, just don’t want to overdo the drinking tonight. I have a headache and I don’t want to exacerbate it,” I lie.

  “Okay, do you need some pain killers? I can get some for you if you want?”

  I shake my head. “No, I had some just before. I’ll be okay.”

  “Okay, well we won’t stay for long just for a drink or two and then I’m taking you back to our suite where I can do very naughty things to you,” he says, making me smirk.

  “Deal,” I reply as he walks off to grab us some drinks.

  Jarred walks over and sits next to me on the lounge. I instantly feel nausea hit me hard as his hand rests on my knee. “You had enough of Colt yet, sugar tits?”

  I cringe and my lip curls up as his hand moves up to my thigh. I scoff at him and push his hand away.

  “Oh c’mon now, you want me. I can see it in the way your body reacts. Why don’t you just let me take you in the bathroom? No one has to know, it can be our little secret,” he says leaning in close and playing with my hair.

  “Jarred the way my body reacts to you is in total revulsion. I have to make a conscious decision to try and stop from puking all over you when you touch me. So, no I will not go with you to the bathroom or anywhere in fact, because you disgust me,” I berate, looking him straight in the eyes.

  He smiles and wiggles his eyebrows. “I like ‘em feisty.” He grabs the back of my head and pulls my face toward his to kiss me. I start to fight him off, but before I know it his hand has left my head and he’s thrown to the floor.

  “What the fuck are you doing, Coslecki. Get it through your fucking arrogant thick arse head that she doesn’t want you. And if you ever try to kiss her again, I swear I will kick you off the tour, right after I kick in your head,” Colt yells taking my hand and pulling me from the lounge. Jarred’s lying on his back on the floor laughing as Hux walks in carrying two see through bags of Cocaine. I look at Hux, who completely ignores his brother as we walk past him and out of the penthouse suite.

  “Hux, you’re a fucking idiot,” Colt calls out, slamming the door and dragging me toward our suite. I rush along with him and he opens the door pulling me inside and through to the bed. I turn to fa
ce him, but he has that look in his eye. The one where he’s in dominant mode and there’s nothing I can do, but go with it. He spins me around and unzips my dress. It falls to the floor and I step out of it and out of my heels. His hands cup my shoulders and then run down my arms and up my spine toward my bra. He unclips it and it falls to the floor. His hands glide back down my back to my panty line and I hear a rip and then they too fall to the floor. I have my back to him standing completely naked as I hear the zip of his jeans. My breathing is heavy as I wait for his next move. I can hear him undressing as I face the bed. I turn my head to look at him and he smacks me on my bare arse hard. I jump a little and glare at him.

  “Eyes front baby,” he says in a low husky voice.

  Every inch of me is tingling in anticipation as I look forward. His hands grasp my hips pulling me back into him. His warmth surrounds me as his lips suck on my neck. His prominent erection grinds into my arse as his hand pushes on my back forcing me to bend down.

  “Grab your ankles,” he says, so deeply it sends a chill down my spine. I grab hold of my ankles as he takes his moist head and rubs it along my pussy making me instantly wet. Colt takes me to places I’ve never been before and this is certainly something new for me.

  “God you’re beautiful like this,” he says as his hand caresses my arse cheek. He takes his hand away and I mourn the loss of contact with him. Slap. I yelp as Colt’s hand strikes me on my arse. I look up at him and he slaps me again and then gently rubs my arse cheek, soothing the sting. I don’t know if I like this or not. I can’t help but notice that I’m dripping wet as his head slides along my pussy, but I’ve never been a fan of pain and what he’s doing to me now is exactly that, painful. He slips his cock inside me and I start to breathe heavier as his hand caresses my sore arse. His hand slaps me again, and then he rams inside me deeply taking me by surprise. My hands instinctively let go of my ankles and reach out to the bed for support. He grabs my hips and pulls me from the bed.