Just Like Em

by Marion Ekholm

  THE BRISK WALK to the corner store did little to help Em unwind. The thought of smoking the cigarettes did even less. A liability, that’s what they were, and she refused to let them hobble her anymore. She needed all her strength to get on with her life, to care for her son and mother. Tossing the unopened pack into the trash, Em raced back to the house. Her job took on added significance now that Roger planned to move from Phoenix, and she had to prepare for work.

  “Where did you take off to?” her mother asked when Em entered the kitchen.

  “A walk.” Em opened the refrigerator and pulled out the container of orange juice. Only a small amount remained, but out of habit, she poured it in a glass before swigging it down.

  “So—did he ask you to marry him?”

  Em placed the empty glass on the counter and wiped her mouth with the dish towel. “You been talking to Samantha?”

  “As a matter of fact, I have. We thought he’d ask you last night. So...?”

  “He asked me.”

  “Well, don’t keep me in suspense. You two getting married or what?”

  “No.” Em paused, aware of how quickly her outward calm was fading. She drew a deep breath. “He suggested a business deal, a pooling of our two families for the greater good.” She glanced at the clock. “I’ve got to get to work.” Her voice cracked.

  In an instant, Doris was by her side. “I’ll call and tell them you’ll be late.”

  “Mom, I...”

  “You’re not getting out of this house till you tell me what’s going on. Might as well shower, too,” Doris said, as she pushed Em toward the hall. “I’ll have breakfast ready when you get out.”

  About fifteen minutes later, Em returned in her beige slacks and cream knit shirt, pulling her damp hair into a ponytail. “Smells good, Mom. By the way, Roger says you’re the better cook.”

  “I should be. I’ve had a few years more practice.” Doris sat down across from her daughter and propped her elbows on the table while she worked hand lotion into her fingers. “So tell me what’s going on.”

  Em picked up some scrambled eggs on her fork, put them in her mouth, then paused a moment to chew and swallow before answering. The eggs tasted like paste, and Em wasn’t sure she could keep them down. She pushed the plate away.

  Doris finished massaging her hands and shoved the plate back in front of Em. “I can’t believe you said no just because he didn’t offer hearts and flowers all tied with a neat satin bow.”

  Em sat back and lifted her chin. “That would have been nice with a little love sprinkled in.”

  “Haven’t you learned by now that love is just fairy dust Cupid throws to blind people?”

  Em’s chin was starting to wobble. If she didn’t stop the conversation now, she’d end up bawling her eyes out and never get to work. She stood and carried her dish to the sink.

  “But you’d have him. That’s what you want, isn’t it?”

  “He wants to move to Seattle. His company offered him a job there. And Sammy—Brad can’t live in a wet climate.”

  Doris opened her mouth, then closed it. After a long sigh, she said, “So what do we do now? Get another apartment? We haven’t got enough put aside to buy a house.”

  Em felt as though the eggs she had eaten might suddenly reappear. She kept her mouth tightly shut and swallowed several times in an attempt to keep them down. “I don’t know,” she said, when she thought it was safe to speak. “I was hoping you could offer a suggestion.”

  Doris got up, walked over to Em and placed her hands on her shoulders. Grateful for the chance to make contact, Em clasped them. “I love him so much and want to be with him,” she said. “But I can’t go there.”

  “Sure you can. I can keep Sammy with me. You could...” Doris sighed as Em squeezed her hands. “It was only a suggestion.”

  “Thanks.” Em pulled free of her mother. “I’d better get to work. Can’t afford to lose this job.”

  Before she could go much farther, Doris pulled her into her arms and the two embraced. “I’m so sorry,” Doris said, tears in her eyes. “I really thought you two could make it together.”

  The phone rang, and Doris went to pick it up as Em gathered her purse. “No, she’s not here,” Doris said in a strident voice.

  Em motioned to herself. Was the call for her? Doris shook her head and moved away so that they no longer made eye contact.

  “She’ll call you when she’s good and ready,” Doris shouted.

  Em came around her mother and removed the phone from her hand. “Who is it?” Em mouthed.

  “Bradley.”

  The white plastic turned into a burning ember in her hand. For a moment, Em stood transfixed. How could she talk to him, this man she had grown to despise, the father of her child? The one person who could destroy her life.

  Slowly she placed the receiver against her ear. “Yes, Bradley? What is it?”

  “What’s going on with you?” he said in that authoritative voice that always made her cringe. “You never return my calls, you haven’t responded to my letters. You too busy fooling around with that guy you’re living with? Or don’t you care that I want my son living with me?”

  Could her psyche possibly withstand more pain? For several seconds Em bit her tongue and stared at the window above the sink, not seeing anything beyond the glass pane. Hadn’t she had enough? At what point could she get this slimeball off her back? No time like the present. She’d already gotten rid of one bad habit; why not try for two?

  “I had a detective check up on you, Bradley.” Em drew a fortifying breath and continued. “Seems you aren’t going to college, and you still have a job. Did you figure I’d never bother to verify all those bills you sent me?”

  “What the hell you do that for?”

  “Because I can’t trust you. Never could.” She felt her momentum increase, like a locomotive picking up speed when it starts to move. She could be an intimidating force, too, once she put her mind to it. “I’ve got a new lawyer. One who has me and my son’s interest at heart.”

  “Say, listen, Emmy Lou, I...”

  “You owe six months’ child support, Bradley. Get it in the mail today or you’ll hear from my lawyer by the end of the week.”

  She pressed the disconnect button and returned the phone to the counter. Motion caught her attention, and she glanced at her mother. Doris gave her a thumbs-up and a grin that lit her features. Em duplicated the motion before grabbing her purse and heading out the door.

  The locomotive was still going strong inside her as she entered her van. She’d contact Harve and have him go after the money Bradley owed her. That might help the family get back on their feet. She concentrated on that thought in an effort to keep all the other problems at bay.

  * * *

  EM STAYED LATE at work to make up the time she’d missed that morning. The sun was on the horizon when she pulled into the drive and saw the sign. She slammed on the brakes.

  Boy, Roger sure didn’t waste any time. Em got out of the van and walked across the desert landscape, the tiny stones crunching beneath her feet. With hands on hips, she examined the printed sign—House For Sale by Owner—with Roger’s phone number scrawled underneath. She controlled a wicked desire to knock it over.

  When had Roger placed the sign there? She hadn’t seen it this morning, but then she hadn’t been firing on all cylinders for the past twenty-four hours.

  Brad chose that moment to run out the door, propel himself into her arms and wrap his legs around her waist, almost toppling them into a barrel cactus. He was tangible, something she could cling to, something to help her keep her tentative hold on sanity.

  “You’re almost too big for this,” she said, returning his stranglehold. “I bet you weigh a hundred pounds.”

  He pushed away so she could see his
face. He grinned, showing off the space where he’d lost a tooth. “Dad’s here,” he said. Immediately, his smile disappeared and he covered his mouth. He squirmed and jumped down. Before she could ask questions, he scooted into the house.

  Bradley was here? Oh, no! Dread gripped her stomach. Every dealing with Bradley Turner brought havoc and ruin. Why had she ever said the things she had? Of all the stupid... Her one attempt to frighten him had backfired and brought him after her. He’d prove she wasn’t a fit mother.

  How had he found her? Em wondered as she proceeded slowly toward the front door. She’d never sent him a change of address after they’d moved from her mother’s apartment. Why would he follow her to Phoenix unless it had something to do with his son? Maybe he really did want the boy back. With mounting trepidation, Em entered the house.

  Slowly, she walked the hall past the staircase and living room into the kitchen. Several dishes remained on the table, but otherwise, the room was empty. Em followed the noise to the family room, her tension rising with each step.

  She made a quick appraisal, looking for her former husband. When Roger turned around and smiled, she felt disoriented. Where was Bradley? How come Roger was here? Then she realized Brad had referred to Roger as Dad—again. No wonder her son had worn a guilty expression and refused to look at her. Thank goodness. She’d repeat the lecture later but right now relief swept over her. At least she didn’t have to deal with her ex-husband.

  “What’s this? A party?” she asked the assembled group. Everyone in the household was present, and they were all smiling as though posing for a picture, as if she were the camera. She scowled at the surreal image they presented and turned to Roger. “Why aren’t you in Seattle?”

  When Roger didn’t answer, the boys went into a giggle fit. Roger raised an eyebrow and pointed toward the hallway. “Isn’t it about time you guys were headed for bed?”

  “No,” they said between chortles.

  He turned to Doris. “Mrs. Masters. Will you do the honors?”

  Doris herded them into the hall. “Say goodnight.”

  “Goodnight,” they said in unison, followed by more laughter.

  “What on earth is so funny?” Em stood by the doorway and watched the procession march through the hall and up the stairs. Since Roger remained close-lipped with his hands behind his back, she hoped Samantha would offer an explanation. Instead, the girl yawned, a drawn-out, Academy Award-worthy dramatization of utter exhaustion.

  “I think I’ll go to bed, too.” She reached up and gave her father a peck on the cheek. Roger waved his hand in dismissal, and Samantha took off after the boys.

  “You look like a woman with a lot of questions,” Roger said as he slowly approached Em.

  “I am. And so far I haven’t had any satisfactory answers.”

  He stopped in front of her, still holding his hands behind his back. “Ask away.”

  “How come you’re home?” she asked again. “And...” The answer came to her in a flash as she started to ask the next question. It made her quiver with excitement. Had Roger found a way for them to be together? “...and why is Brad calling you Dad?”

  “I’m home because my plane was delayed.”

  Disappointment dampened her spirits immediately. “Oh,” was all she could think to say.

  “It gave me a chance to think, and I came to some very important decisions. Mainly, I want to grow old with you.” He brought his hands around to the front. “For you,” he said, offering a single red rose. “It’s a little worse for wear. I’ve been holding it for the past two hours, waiting for you to come home.”

  “I had to make up time at work.” Em took the rose and held the bloom to her nose. She closed her eyes and breathed in the sweet smell. The roller-coaster ride was beginning again. Would this ascent to happiness be followed by another plunge to despair? She opened her eyes and looked at Roger. What more could she expect?

  He reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue box. “This is for you, too. It’s the same one you returned earlier.”

  She kept her hand fisted. “I still can’t accept it, Roger.” After a slight pause, she added, “Unless something’s changed.”

  “Everything’s changed.” He removed the ring from its velvet lining, opened her hand and placed it on her finger. “Your mother said you never had an engagement ring. Let this be the beginning of many firsts.”

  Em looked at the rainbows of light emanating from the ring, which blurred as her eyes misted over. “But...you’re selling the house. Moving to Seattle. I can’t...”

  “I’m selling the house because I’m not moving to Seattle.”

  “But why? If you’re not...?”

  “We need a place of our own. One that doesn’t come loaded with memories.”

  One without Karen, Em thought as she smiled back at Roger.

  “And don’t get too attached to that ring. We may need it for collateral if I’m not able to find work in Phoenix.” He grinned.

  Em covered the ring protectively with her other hand. “Never. I’ll work a second job if I have to just to keep it.”

  Roger clasped her arms. “Would you?” He pulled her into an embrace and nuzzled her neck. “Oh, Em. If that plane had taken off on time, I’d have been on the next one heading back just to be with you. I couldn’t leave you behind. I love you so much.”

  Em let the warmth of his embrace flow through her. Roger loved her. What more could she possibly want?

  EPILOGUE

  “WILL WE BE able to dive in it, Dad?” Chip asked

  “No,” Roger said as he laid out the poles that supported the above-ground pool.

  “What good is it, then?” Chaz tapped his foot on the large section of plastic. “I liked our other pool better.”

  Brad placed an arm around Chaz’s shoulders. “Yeah. That was a real pool,” Brad said. Roger glanced at his newest son. Bradley had finally come through with the signed papers that had allowed Roger to adopt the boy.

  “So is this one, and it will keep you just as cool when summer arrives.”

  Doris ambled across the grass and set a tray of glasses and a pitcher of iced tea on the lawn table. “Haven’t you noticed? Summer is already here.” She was right. It wasn’t even June yet, and the temperatures were heading toward triple digits. After Doris poured the tea, Roger took a sip and wiped his brow, running his hand through his hair.

  He turned to Em and grinned. “Want some? I’ll bring it over.”

  “I can get it,” Em said from her seat under the trellis. “I’m not an invalid, you know.”

  “Stay there. I could use a rest in the shade.” Roger scooted through the rose garden, avoiding several thorny branches that threatened to grab him.

  “I’ll have to trim those.” He sat down next to her and placed an arm on the back of the bench.

  “Wait until tomorrow,” Em said after taking a refreshing sip. “José and Sophia are driving in for lunch, and he can show you the proper way to do it.”

  “Don’t you trust me?”

  “Not in my garden.”

  Roger leaned closer and pressed a kiss against her cheek. “And just when did this become your garden?”

  “On our wedding day.” Em shifted into a comfortable spot against his chest as his arm enfolded her. He hadn’t bothered to shave, and the bristles gently massaged her skin as he moved his hot, damp cheek against hers. After several hours of working in the sun, any lingering scents of soap and aftershave had left.

  “You need a shower.”

  “You going to help?” he whispered in her ear.

  Em grabbed a handful of his damp athletic shirt and pulled him closer. “How did you ever manage without me?”

  With eyes closed, Roger pressed his lips against her hair. How did he ever?

 
He thought back to that sunny day the beginning of November when Em said “I do” under this same trellis. Close relatives and friends had attended the small wedding in the garden and the reception in his parents’ house. Only, now it was their house, his and Em’s home, to share with three sons, a daughter and another one on the way. Thanks to the ultrasound at the doctor’s office, they knew they were having a little girl.

  At six months, Em had begun to show. Roger patted her small round belly. “Kay kicking a lot?”

  “Yes.” Extracting herself from his embrace, Em straightened and stood, holding her hand against her back. “She has told me in no uncertain terms that she doesn’t like my sitting on a hard wood bench. I’ll go make lunch.”

  Roger grasped her hand, refusing to let Em go. “Have your mother do it. I need to clean up before we eat.”

  With a laugh that still warmed his insides every time he heard it, Em headed for the house. He watched her, wondering all the while how he could be so lucky.

  Em continued at her job, which provided for her own daily expenses and the medical insurance she’d need for the baby. Headhunters had found several jobs outside the area that paid well, but Em had insisted she wanted to stay in her new home. Those same headhunters were working for him, now, looking for jobs in the Phoenix area. They’d lined up several interviews in the coming week, so he expected to find employment before his severance ran out. At times his unemployment weighed on him, since he knew that Em had supported a previous husband. And now Kay was coming—yet another mouth to feed. But he was optimistic about the future.

  When they’d searched for names for the new baby, the boys had suggested Karen after their mother. Roger knew that wouldn’t go over well with Em, so he’d dampened their suggestion. But Em had come through with a suggestion of her own.

  Why not name her Kay for Karen? she had said.

  Right, Samantha had agreed. Like Em is for Emmy Lou.

  It was a name they could all agree on. Just another sign of Em’s generous nature.

  How on earth did he deserve someone as wonderful as Auntie Em?

  * * * * *