Never Deal with Dragons

by Christensen, Lorenda

  I crawled out from beneath the bed, or what was left of it. The dragon had Carol by the back of her neck, and my friend had both hands scratching at his arm trying to free herself.

  I searched the room frantically. Was there nothing here I could use as a weapon? Carol’s face was almost blue. The dragon’s claw was so large that even from behind, his grip cut off her air supply. With nothing else in sight, I grabbed the long metal pole of the lamp and brought it down on the dragon’s neck.

  The contact did nothing but bruise my palm. I’m not even sure the dragon noticed he’d been hit.

  Carol coughed as she crumpled to the floor. The dragon turned to face me.

  Okay, so maybe he had noticed.

  “So, I’m guessing Hian-puo didn’t send you to invite me to his possible release party?” Carol coughed a couple of times, and tried to get her hands under her body.

  Waving the metal pole at the dragon to keep his attention firmly away from my friend, I felt my legs hit the back of the bed. I skirted to the other side of the mattress. It wasn’t much for protection, but it did cause the dragon to step just a little farther from the door.

  I tried not to look at Carol as she crawled slowly toward the exit. I didn’t hold out much hope that I’d live through this, but it’d be nice to know I didn’t kill my friend in the process.

  When I saw her stand and half limp, half run out the door, I gave a sigh of relief. Right before I almost got my chest ripped open. I careened backward, the tip of the dragon’s claw slicing into the clasp on my bra. I felt only a small prick, but my breasts went instantly saggy.

  I instinctively made a grab for the tatters of my shirt, keeping my eye on the dragon. Only when he made no move to get closer did I look down at the mangled mess of clothing. “Now look what you did. That was my favorite bra. I had matching panties and everything.”

  My hand fisted the cloth, and I felt the gentle nudge of my underwire slipping from the slit the dragon made in my bra.

  My underwire!

  The dragon eyed me curiously as I fumbled with my shirt, probably wondering why I’d started fondling myself.

  When I jerked the wire completely free and brandished it like a dagger, he laughed.

  “You attack me with underwear?”

  Okay, it was stupid, but it was the only thing I had. “I don’t suppose we could talk about this? I’ve got some friends with DRACIM. I could get you free pork for life. The good stuff. Grain fed.”

  For an answer, the dragon picked up the box springs and mattress and tossed them against the wall.

  “I’m going to assume that’s a no.”

  “What the—”

  I’d never been so excited to hear Richard’s voice than I was right now.

  “Myrna!” Carol’s voice was frantic.

  I couldn’t see either of them; the ceilings in the hotel might be incredibly tall, but I wasn’t. With the dragon between me and the door, I could only scream a quick I-have-no-idea-what’s-going-on before, once again, pressing myself against the sliding glass door to the balcony to avoid having my ribs cracked open.

  With every dodge, my boobs did a little jiggle in the night air. Leave it to me to forgo a swim in the hotel tub, only to die bare-chested with my shirt ripped neck to hem.

  “This wasn’t part of the plan!”

  I was about to tell Richard this was a really bad time for humor, and that a plan for getting me out of here alive would be more than welcome, but I was shocked when my attacker answered as if the question had been posed to him.

  “Hian-puo said the plan had changed. The girl needs to die.”

  “He told me he was sending someone to retrieve the paperwork and biosensor after I got rid of the guards. Nothing more.”

  What? Richard knew about this visit?

  The dragon never took his eyes from my face. “She dies. Along with any witnesses. Those are my orders.”

  This was bad. Very, very bad.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “Not if I can help it.” I heard my friend’s voice just before the dragon’s face transformed with utter shock. He let out a huge roar of pain, and swung around. I saw the cause.

  Carol had grabbed a poker from the fireplace and stabbed it just under the dragon’s arm, into his soft underbelly. The weapon now protruded from between his ribs.

  Enraged, the enormous creature drew back and hit Carol across the face with a meaty arm. My friend was knocked backward, her head hitting the wall before she crumpled to the floor, unconscious.

  Richard bellowed in rage. He pulled out a gun and fired wildly. The bullets hit the dragon with audible thumps, and small droplets of purple appeared along his scaly torso. But I knew from my training with Trian there was little possibility of serious damage. Richard had succeeded only in becoming the dragon’s next target.

  Turning fully toward Richard, the vicious reptile dropped to all fours and snarled.

  “You’ll pay for that.”

  My gaze swept the room, looking for something, anything. I spotted the metal poker the dragon had yanked from his side. Suddenly, I had an idea.

  A stupid one, yes. But desperation made everything look bright and shiny. I dropped my underwire, and, moving slowly so I wouldn’t attract attention, I inched over and scooped the pen off the floor.

  Gripping my pathetic weapon in a tight fist, I bounded over the splintered bed frame and onto the dragon’s back. Stretching full-length, I used my free hand to clasp the dragon’s horn and pull myself up his neck. Praying Trian’s advice was accurate, I jabbed the pen into the dragon’s head, just behind his ear.

  He bucked, hard, and I went sailing across the room, landing hip first onto the overturned bedside table. Pain exploded along my right side, and for a moment the room went dark. By the time my vision had cleared, the dragon was going completely crazy.

  He thrashed around the room at random, colliding with furniture and sending it flying through the air. When he finally tripped over the sofa and fell, his tail knocked the heavy television from its stand. He pushed up from the floor and looked straight at me. And then he turned away.

  He couldn’t see me! I’d done it. I’d blinded him.

  Doing my best to ignore the spear of agony that shot through my leg every time I moved, I crawled cautiously toward the door, careful to stay out of the dragon’s path.

  I shouldn’t have worried. Terrified at his abrupt lack of vision, my attacker had forgotten us completely. He staggered around, tripping on electrical cords and knocking pictures from the wall.

  With Richard’s help, I was able to drag Carol out the room and down the hall. We ducked into the small alcove of the elevator landing and listened as Hian-puo’s assassin burst through the hotel’s sliding glass window.

  I crawled to the window and looked out just in time to see the dragon trip over the balcony railing and fall. He managed to remember his wings only seconds before he hit the ground, but because of his eyes, he flew only a few feet before crumpling into a heap in the middle of the parking lot. I guess he’d decided to wait until his vision returned before attempting an escape.

  I looked back to my friend.

  “I’m so sorry,” Richard babbled to the unconscious Carol. “They were only getting the papers. We needed to understand how the canister mechanism was releasing. You weren’t supposed to get hurt.” He ran a hand along the curve of her face.

  Over the din of insane dragon, I listened, in shock, as Richard tearfully detailed his actions over the past few days. It had been Richard who had broken into Hian-puo’s office looking for schematics for the machine. Unable to locate any specifics on the device, he’d developed a plan when Hian-puo tipped us on the location of a working prototype. Instead of destroying the weapon as I’d thought, Richard had waited until I was asleep to load it into the trunk of the car. When Emory and Amy appeared at the trial, Richard saw his opportunity to ship the machine back to Tulsa.

  “Why?”

  Richard blinked, and I watched a
s sanity permeated his hysterical brain. I could almost see the moment that he realized what he’d just confessed, and that he’d spilled too much to lie his way out.

  He looked at me pleadingly. “I did it for her. And my dad.” Richard flung an arm toward my destroyed hotel suite. “Myrna, look what just happened. Dragons are dangerous. Freaks of science. My dad has been stuck in a wheelchair for twenty-three years because of those monsters. Twenty-three years! It’s time that the human race stands up and corrects their mistake once and for all.”

  He was shaking with emotion. I put a gentle hand on his clasped fists and waited for him to meet my eyes. “Richard, I’m so sorry about your father. I really am. But listen to yourself. You’re talking about declaring war against thousands of dragons worldwide. Do you have any idea how many people you’re putting in danger?”

  “They won’t be in danger! This machine doesn’t harm humans. Only dragons. These monsters are not people. They are artificially created killers. They weren’t even supposed to exist—how can we just stand by and let them destroy the human race?”

  “That,” he jabbed a finger toward my room, “was a lab mistake, and we’re pretending they’re our equals. We needed something that can remove the dragons, but doesn’t hurt humans? This machine, it’s perfect.”

  I stared in shock. “I just don’t understand. Richard, you spent years serving a dragon lord! You helped create their language. How can you do this to them?”

  He laughed, and the wild look was back in his eyes. I winced when he crushed my knuckles in his hands.

  “Do you think I wanted to work for a dragon? Myrna, I’m a dragonspeaker. It’s the only job I could find. We’re reviled by the rest of the population.”

  He had a point. Dragonspeakers weren’t exactly treasured by the public at large, but we weren’t hated. After all, they needed us to keep the peace. “You know that’s not true.”

  But Richard wasn’t listening. His voice dropped even lower as he struggled to finish his story. “When my dad was hurt, our faces were splashed across every newspaper in the country. Most businesses wouldn’t even let me in the door. They didn’t want the dragons coming after me, and the rest of their employees dying in the crossfire.”

  So he’d decided to get even. By destroying their entire race.

  “Richard, I can’t let you do this.”

  I looked down at Carol. Her eyes fluttered, and I wondered how much she’d heard. Or how much she might agree with Richard. She blinked, and then focused her eyes on me. “Myrna. You have to go.”

  I almost couldn’t do it. I needed to find Trian and tell him about the bomb sent with Emory to DRACIM, but there was no way I could avoid telling Relobu about Richard. And there was no way Relobu would allow Richard to live after learning of his involvement.

  His death would crush Carol.

  I felt Carol’s hands as she coaxed Richard’s grip to loosen on mine. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” She looked at me as she said the words, and I swallowed around the lump in my throat.

  I squeezed her once, hard. “I know you will.”

  And then I forced my bruised body to stand and walk away.

  *

  Trian’s eyes widened when I stumbled into the conference room where the dragon council debated Hian-puo’s fate, with my blouse in tatters and my leg threatening not to hold my weight. Ignoring the crowd of dragons, who were perched in an informal circle arguing over the details of Hian-puo’s case, Trian leapt from his chair and put an arm around my aching ribs.

  “Owww.” I grimaced as his thigh bumped my hip and sent another jolt of pain shooting down my leg.

  He guided me to a chair, and I collapsed on the soft seat cushion with a groan.

  “Trian, we have a problem.”

  “Myrna, what’s happened?” I gratefully accepted the jacket he laid across my shoulders. Considering all my clothing was trapped in a hotel room with a dragon gone berserk, I’d had no choice but to run through the halls half naked.

  I glanced to the now-quiet members of the dragon council. Most of the dragons could understand English just fine, even if they couldn’t speak it, but I switched to dragonspeak so I wouldn’t have to keep my languages straight if they asked any questions. They needed to hear this too.

  I gave Trian, and the dragons, a rundown on the situation, beginning with the attack in my room and ending with Emory’s involvement in the scheme. Lord Relobu’s head came up when I mentioned Richard, but he said nothing until my story was complete.

  “Myrna,” Lord Relobu looked to me, “if I spoke with Emory on the telephone, would it persuade him to turn over the weapon?”

  “Maybe.” I hesitated, and looked to the dragon council apologetically, more than a little embarrassed to admit I’d worked for an idiot for over five years. “Except Emory isn’t a dragonspeaker. And he doesn’t like dragons. I have no doubt he’s aware of Richard’s entire plan. But he’s a coward. He’d never challenge a request issued by a dragon lord.”

  I glanced back to Lord Relobu. “The problem is delivering the request. Emory might be a coward, but he’s smart enough to avoid your call. And even if you managed to get through to him, he’d just say there wasn’t a translator available.”

  The dragon nodded, then looked to my boyfriend.

  “Trian, can you fly?”

  Trian nodded. “I can be back to Tulsa in seven hours, nine if I’m carrying a passenger. But DRACIM won’t let me in without an appointment.” I winced. The appointment thing was courtesy of my temper tantrum the day he’d shown up with Richard.

  Trian’s gaze flicked to me. “How badly are you injured?”

  “I can sit in a saddle, if that’s what you’re asking.” My side hurt like I’d just been four rounds with a cement truck, but I was almost positive there was nothing broken.

  “I’m sorry to put you in this position, but you and Richard are the only two who know what the machine looks like. I’d ask Dr. Renault, but it’s my understanding that he hasn’t yet recovered from his last flight.”

  I nodded. I’d never seen the actual weapon, but based on the schematics I’d poured over on the flight from Beijing to Budapest, I had a good idea of its appearance.

  “No, I’m good. I can go.” I tried to smile. “Though I would appreciate a change of clothes.” Naked chests on a trans-Atlantic flight were a recipe for hypothermia. And at the low altitude Trian would be flying due to his human passenger, an eyeful for any random sky watchers on the way. I had no desire to play a short-haired Godiva for a few countries’ worth of strangers.

  Trian strode to the door and stuck his head outside the room, issuing a set of quick instructions to a waiting guard. Stepping back in, he told me the clothes would be here in five minutes. “Along with some painkillers.”

  I tossed him a grateful smile. I closed my eyes and I waited for my newest wardrobe. New clothes had become a harbinger of death and destruction in my little world.

  I heard Lord Relobu attempt to contact Emory through DRACIM. Based on his irritated snorts and shouts, I could tell they were giving him the runaround. After several politely worded orders to track him down, Relobu was forced to give up the search. No one knew Emory’s current location, and if they did, they weren’t sharing.

  A black spandex bodysuit landed in my lap, along with a fur-lined coat of the same color. I scowled at Trian. “Had to go with the skintight option, huh?”

  He grinned, totally unapologetic. “Hey, it’s not often a gorgeous woman allows me to dress her.” But when he knelt down to face level, his expression became serious. “The spandex will help reduce the jostling. The black is just in case there are more persons involved that we’re aware of. Most of our flight will be under the cover of darkness, and I don’t want you becoming a target while we’re in the air.”

  The thought of being shot down from the sky had never occurred to me. Suddenly, the random sky watchers didn’t seem so bad.

  “I never thought I’d say it, but I mis
s the vomit at DRACIM.”

  Trian gave my hand a sympathetic squeeze before heading outside to morph.

  *

  After I’d gingerly donned my superhero outfit, a stranger met me outside the bathroom with a glass of water and a tiny cup of pills.

  I took them gratefully, ready for anything that would cause my hip to stop broadcasting like a pain beacon. The same stranger offered an arm, escorting me outside to Trian. Someone had strapped a pilot’s cage and saddle to his back, and he stood patiently on all fours as I approached.

  It was the first time I’d seen him in dragon form without an accompanying layer of blood. He was enormous. The lights from the street glinted off his cobalt scales, and his neck stretched proudly above the first floor of the hotel. Wrapped tightly in my fur coat, I placed a gloved hand against his sleek neck, marveling at his immense beauty.

  Before I mounted, Trian eyed me carefully, nudging me gently on the chin with his nose.

  “I knew the suit would look good on you.” The air through his newly formed vocal cords created a distinct rumble in his usually smooth voice. He snuffed my hair playfully, until I rolled my eyes and pushed him away.

  “Don’t get used to it. I’m pretty sure I’ll be arrested for indecency if anyone catches me in this getup.”

  “Not while you’re riding me.”

  He had a point. For all his pretty coloring, the dragon’s body displayed an impressive amount of strength and sharp corners. No one would dare risk angering this massive beast.

  At least I hoped so.

  I gave him a pat on the nose. “You know, I’ve wanted to fly on a dragon for most of my life. Who would have thought my chance would come in the middle of a possible dragon apocalypse?”

  He nuzzled my shoulder. “I promise—we’ll do this again soon. Without the impending doom. I’ll even thrown in a picnic.”

  I laughed. “Sounds good, so long as you’re carrying your own lunch. I refuse to haul around a herd of pigs.”

  “That’s a deal. A sandwich will be fine. Dragon or not, I prefer my food fully cooked. Hop on—we need to get going. I’ve asked them to tie you in tight. The drugs I gave you are pretty stout.”