How To Resist A Heartbreaker
Page 17
‘Yeah, well, don’t let it go to your head. And I expect at least three nominations in return from you next year. Between the two of us we could take this whole awards dinner out. What do you think—a Maitland coup?’
Max laughed. ‘Think big, my boy. Next stop world domination. But we won’t achieve that without working together. So how about we finally put the past behind us and look forward?’
Mitchell’s jaw tightened as he thought about it, running his hand across his chin. ‘We’ve been through a lot, you and me. What they did was wrong. No one asked us what we wanted, no one thought about what was best for us. We were too young to be heard.’
And neither of them had really recovered. At least, Max knew he hadn’t. He was still stuck in the emotional wringer. Hence his accusations of selfishness and God knew what to Gabby. It suddenly became clear. He’d seen her actions through the tarnished lens of his own experiences, mixed up his issues with hers, and had come out of it the poorer. Judged her. Lost her. ‘How did you get over it?’
Mitchell breathed out and shook his head. ‘You can’t hate everyone forever. People make mistakes, that’s human nature. But you have to let go and try make a good life for yourself or you’ll die lost and lonely. It’s taken way too long already. Now it’s time we tried to build on the good things.’ Those cool Maitland eyes zeroed in. ‘Are you in?’
‘Yes. Absolutely.’ Max bumped shoulders with his brother and chinked his glass with Mitch’s. ‘To the Maitlands. A force to be reckoned with.’
‘Hell, yeah. To us.’
Jodi looked across at them and winked. ‘Whoa! Brotherly love overkill.’
Knowing that there was a future for them all sent a hot buzz through him. There was still a long way to go and a lot to work through. But he had a family. Okay. Wow. Who would have known how good that would actually feel?
Gabby would be proud.
*
Gabby wouldn’t be proud of this, though. Much, much later, Max sat on his deck in the cool night air, his head in his hands, and stared at the decimated garden. So his attention had been temporarily distracted. He hadn’t watered or fed the plants for a while—he’d been busy. And, yeah, okay, he’d kept the curtains closed so he wouldn’t have to see them and the bright colour that reminded him of what he’d walked away from.
But did they all have to die?
Of course they did. Just his luck. He tipped his head back and let the emotion spring free from his lungs in a long, cold laugh. Typical that not all the happy cards could be stacked in his favour. He had a family, sure, but no one to share that amazing feeling with.
No Gabby to share it with.
Slowly he picked off brown leaves and let them drop to the deck. Maybe it was a sign. He should throw them all in the bin and retreat to the barren landscape of his pre-Gabby life. It was colourless but ordered. Dull but predictable. Most of all it was pain-free.
He looked across the tops of the city buildings to the Sky Tower. Remembered the bravery she’d found to jump off. The risks she’d started to take for both of them. The pain she’d endured for almost half of her life. The loss. But she’d still taken her courage in both hands and followed her heart.
Maybe the dead plants weren’t a sign at all. Maybe they had absolutely nothing to do with his failed relationships and everything to do with the fact that he buried himself in his job to avoid taking real risks. With his heart, and his life.
His twin was right—people made the best decisions they could at the time, and lived with the consequences.
Gabby had at least found the courage to tell him, and to make such an admission would have cost her. And yet he’d failed to even try to understand. Instead, he’d taken the route he’d always taken, judged and blamed. Refused to think things through beyond his own experience. He’d seen everything through the jaundiced eyes of his past.
Mitchell’s words came back to him. Maybe he needed to stop blaming everyone else and take a chance on what he wanted. On what could actually, finally, make him happy.
He was, after all, the doctor of second chances. But was it too late even for him?
He shifted his gaze over the Auckland landscape towards the sun rising over Rangitoto. A glow of muted oranges and yellows infused the air, casting pale light over the lush green of the island. Above, the dark shroud of night gave way to a dazzling blue sky. There it was, just out of reach, waiting for him to grab it.
Damn it, it was definitely time to add more colour to his life.
*
What the hell? Persistent thumping on the French windows jolted Gabby from her sleep. Mad axeman? Police?
As she dragged open the curtain her anxiety hit a record high. A mad axeman might have been preferable. At least she’d have known how to react.
Her silly shaking hands refused to work and her pulse jigged along at such an erratic rate she couldn’t think straight. ‘Max? What the heck…?’
‘Good morning, Charge Nurse Radley. I need to talk to you.’ He stood in the doorway wearing a crumpled tuxedo with his black tie hanging loosely around his neck. Crisp white dress-shirt tails poked out from under his jacket. Creased, slim-fitting trousers emphasised his divine body. He looked like he hadn’t slept for days. He looked ruffled and edgy. He looked…simply stunning.
Or perhaps that was just the stars in her peripheral vision. But good looks were no excuse for barging into her space.
Hell, she’d come to terms with him leaving her, and what he thought of her. She didn’t like it but it had happened. And, as always, she was dealing with the fallout. Work helped. Mojitos helped more. But she was still raw. He hadn’t given them time to talk things through more. He hadn’t even given her the time of day.
It was bad enough that she bumped into him at work, but having him in her room again? Cruel. ‘It’s six-thirty in the morning on my day off. So this had better be important.’
‘It is. It’s a matter of life and death.’ He bent down and produced a cardboard box containing the most pathetic collection of droopy geraniums she’d ever seen. ‘We need help.’
‘You can say that again. It’s about time you realised.’ Examining the state of the plants, she moved sideways and let him in, taking care not to inhale too closely. Lord only knew what would happen if she breathed in that smell of his too. It was intoxicating. Lethal.
But he’d come here at the crack of dawn because of plants? He’d clearly joined her in the crazy stakes.
She carried the geraniums through to the kitchen and placed them in the sink. Then turned on the cold tap in an attempt at resuscitation. ‘You need intensive care. Or at least they do. I don’t know what I was thinking, giving you sole care of these.’
‘I neglected them.’ He studied her and gave her a nervous smile. ‘Look, Gabby, I neglected a lot of things.’
‘Oh?’ Now this was getting interesting. Her heart restarted its weird axe-murderer lumpy rhythm. ‘Like what?’
‘Like telling you how very sorry I am that we lost our baby.’ And that you can’t have any more.
He didn’t have to say it, but it was there in the silence and in those startling Maitland eyes. She pressed her lips together to hold the hurt inside. They’d never had a chance to grieve together and come to terms with the pregnancy and the loss. Everything had happened so quickly. Including falling in love with him. ‘Me too.’
He took a deep breath. ‘And I neglected to tell you I understand about Joe.’
‘Oh.’ Her hand instinctively went to her necklace. ‘Max, I don’t need—’
He gently placed his finger on her lips. ‘I said I understand. I really do. I’ve thought about the hell you must have gone through so young. I couldn’t see that. I just judged you because of what happened to me. The words “adoption” and “fostering” left me cold, and I couldn’t see past that. I’m so sorry. I was a jerk.’
She shrugged, trying to find words, but nothing seemed adequate. So she smiled instead. ‘Yes, you were. A capital jerk.’
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He smiled too. ‘Gee, thanks.’
‘I was only agreeing with you.’
His smile grew serious. ‘I do know how much you’re hurting. Losing someone is tragic. I know.’ His fingers went to the diamond. ‘This is something to do with Joe, isn’t it?’
‘Yes, it’s his birthstone. I never take it off.’
‘I noticed.’ His eyebrows rose and she saw his eyes were warm, sparking with a gentleness that melted that hardened corner of her heart. ‘That first night in the bar?’
‘Was his birthday.’ The day she celebrated and regretted in equal measure every year. Now the hurt meshed with the love she felt for her child and for Max. She didn’t know if she was strong enough to take any more.
Then his palm caressed the necklace, stroked her throat. Heat zipped between them. ‘It’s beautiful. Like you.’
Her need for him was shooting off the scale. Being so close to him was torment. She stepped away. ‘Max, please, don’t do this. I can’t take these games.’
‘Will you ever stop interrupting?’ He laughed and filled the space she’d left. Kissing distance. That’s all. ‘Hear me out, Gabby. I neglected to tell you that I’m crazy mixed-up and only just beginning to get sorted out. I’m trying, I honestly am. I wasn’t looking to fall in love with you, but it just happened, and I didn’t know how to deal with it. And then the ectopic pregnancy clouded everything and I was scared for you… Eugh— What the hell?’
He tapped his foot and made a splashing sound.
Together they looked down at the lake of water lapping towards their feet.
‘Shoot! The tap!’ Gabby jumped to the sink, where the plants bobbed forlornly. ‘Great. That’s all I need. You causing chaos. A plant graveyard. And now a flood. It’s Armageddon. Save me from the plague of…’ She paused. ‘Oh, yes. Of course, I know…’ Arms dripping with water, she shook her fist skywards, tipped her head back and giggled. ‘Nonna! That’s enough now. Stop it. Leave me alone.’
‘You don’t believe all that, do you? She’s not really got it in for you.’
Gabby smiled. For some reason, even though he was causing chaos in her home and her heart, she felt freer than she’d ever been in her life. So phooey to Nonna. ‘No. But it’s always good to have someone else to blame, right?’ Shoving a towel at him, she said, ‘Now, give me a hand clearing up.’
Starting at the edge of the room she knelt and pressed a towel into the water, then squeezed it out into the kitchen bowl. Max knelt next to her and together they worked through to the middle of the room. Every time he dragged the towel back towards him his arm brushed against hers. Every time their skin touched she felt the same jolt of electricity she’d had the first day they’d met. Seemed nothing had changed, certainly hadn’t dimmed. If anything, her feelings for him had deepened.
When he caught her eye she captured his gaze. I love you.
The words were there, threatening to trip off her tongue, but then his little speech before the flood began to sink in. She knelt up and pulled him round to face her, the tight knot in her throat threatening to choke her. ‘Hold on. Hey, Maitland One. You love me?’
‘Finally. Yes, Gabby. I love you.’
‘Well, wow. That’s a surprise.’ She balled the towel into her fist and screwed it tighter, not knowing how to deal with the sudden lightness in her chest. And trying at the same time to be strong when tears were springing in her eyes.
‘Yeah, well, it was news to me too.’ He took the towel from her hands and dropped it to the floor. Then took her hands in his and held them against his chest. Water seeped up through her pyjamas. But she didn’t care. All she wanted to do was look into those eyes and listen to his voice. Soft and gentle, yet solid and strong.
‘But it’s the best kind of news. I’m not good at this, Gabby. You make me happy. That’s all. From the minute I saw you in the pub I’ve been lost. In you. You’ve shaken me up, changed my life and I didn’t want you to do that at first. I fought against it, I didn’t want to love you. I lost my parents and Mitchell and I’ve been too afraid I’d lose you too. But now I have the love thing cooking well. And I’m working on the trust.’
Was this what she thought it was? Was this what she even wanted? This could be a chance for them both, a second chance at grasping the life they both wanted. ‘What are you saying? The commitment-phobe wants to commit now? Somehow?’
He grinned. ‘Yes. Yes, I do, Gabby. I know I have a long way to go, but I reckon that together we can put the hard times behind us.’
She’d never believed it could be possible. But seeing the devotion on Max’s face challenged her beliefs. She could be loved. She was lovable. She could love. She just needed to let it in, and allow herself to give love too. To Max.
Just one thing stood in the way. ‘But what about babies? You know I can’t have any now, and I don’t want you to hold that against me sometime in the future. You have to be honest with me. And I understand if you want to walk away.’ She held her breath, her pulse racing as he looked deep into her eyes.
‘I know, Gabby, and I’m so very sorry. You’d make a wonderful mum. Maybe we can get help, and we can certainly look at options. Whatever you want. And if it doesn’t happen for us then we’ll be stronger for it.’ Cupping her chin, he tilted her face to his. ‘Trust me, there are enough Maitlands in the world.’
How could there ever be? She laughed. ‘But I want you to have everything you deserve, and that includes a family.’
‘I have one right here. That’s enough for me.’ At her frown he pressed a kiss on her forehead. ‘Honestly.’
‘Are you sure? Because I don’t want you to regret—’
His mouth pressed against hers and stopped her words. Stopped any kind of rational thought. All she knew was that he was there, with her, and that was all that mattered. Anything else could be talked about and worked on. Now that they both knew how.
His kiss intensified as he meshed his fingers in her hair, crushed his body against hers. And she crushed him right back, clinging to him because this time she would never let him go. His arms held her so tightly she knew he felt the same.
He tasted sweet and dark, promising a day of sinful pleasure. And another, and another. A lifetime.
After yet another mind-numbing kiss he drew back a little and traced his thumb along her bottom lip. She caught it between her teeth, mesmerised by the heat and the love blazing in his gaze. His words came out in a whisper. ‘So how about we work on it together? Slowly.’
‘How slowly?’ She wriggled her hips against him and nodded towards the bedroom. ‘Not too slowly, I hope?’
His hands ran down her back and cupped her bottom as a dangerous glint infiltrated those Maitland eyes. ‘Well, we could start with the physical…see how we go. Give me a score and we’ll work on improving it. Every day. I can work very hard and I’m a fast learner.’
As he picked her up and walked through to the bedroom she leaned her head against his chest, felt the regular solid thud of his heart. And hers jumped in sync. Whatever the future held for them now, they’d face it together. ‘Sounds like a plan, Maitland One, a very good plan.’
Just like always.
A perfect ten.
Two years later…
‘So Mister Five, happy birthday. How was your first day of school?’ Gabby stepped into Mitch and Jodi’s lounge, handed over the birthday present to her eager nephew, and couldn’t hold back a smile. It was so great to see him tearing around without a care in the world.
He ripped off the wrapping paper and dithered, one eye on the playroom, clearly uninterested in the adult small talk when there was fun to be had with a new fire engine and lots of friends. ‘Cool, Auntie Gabby. We had story time and a birthday cake for me.’
‘Cool indeed. Now, go play with your party guests.’ Gabby ruffled Jamie’s hair until he dodged out of her grip. Then she went to help Jodi in the kitchen, preparing sandwiches for the hyped-up five-year-olds.
Two years had seen her a
nd Jodi becoming fast friends, and the chances to meet up and grow into each other’s life had become more and more frequent. ‘He’s growing up fast.’
‘Way too fast. But healthy, thank goodness. There were times I didn’t dare imagine he could even make five. But he’s like a whirlwind. I wish I had half his energy.’ Jodi stopped cutting and looked up, tired shadows lining her eyes. But they were happy shadows and for good reason. Gabby’s heart did a little dance as she watched the soon-to-be mum press her hand to her bulging tummy. ‘And how I’m going to manage with a baby and a five-year-old demon, I don’t know.’
‘Just so long as you take care and get lots of rest. And we’ll be there to help.’
As Gabby spoke she heard the door latch drop, felt the familiar flicker of heat and her body’s immediate response. Max was here. She wandered through to the front room, trying to keep her excitement in check. ‘Hey, husband.’
‘Hi, Charge Nurse Maitland. Sorry I’m late. You know what it’s like. Things don’t always go as planned.’
‘You’re here now and that’s all that matters.’ She curled into his waiting arms, pressed a kiss on his cheek. Then, leaning her head against his chest, she took a breath. ‘I have news.’
‘We got the house?’ He drew back a little. ‘I thought we were exchanging contracts tomorrow.’
‘Yes. Tomorrow, and as far as I know that’s all going well.’ She bit her bottom lip, weighing up the words. For over ten years she’d shunned this—then struggled to believe it could be possible. ‘Phillipe rang.’
‘And?’ Max’s face clouded. Their journey had not been easy. Two rounds of assisted fertility had been testing on both of them, but they’d stuck through it, holding each other up when it had seemed impossible. He’d been there for her throughout, solid and determined and reliable. And had infused it all with his sense of fun and his love. Anything seemed possible with him around.
Her heart almost beat out of her chest. ‘And it worked. I’m pregnant.’
‘Okay. Sit down.’ He steered her to a chair as if she would break at the tiniest touch. His mouth twitched into a slow smile that spread and lit up his face. ‘How many eggs took?’