Fighting Lust: A Deadly Sins Novel

by Jennifer Miller

  Concluding, she looks back at the Judge, nods and makes eye contact with the prosecutor and Jane, and smiles, then stands, “That’s my statement. I’m done here.”

  The Judge nods his head, “Thank you Tessa for being here today.”

  Tessa walks off the stand and I’m already standing to meet her. She takes my hand and we walk out of the room. We don’t say a word as we walk down the hall. I’m anxious to get her out of here, and we can talk, hell I can breathe again once we do.

  “Tessa!” a voice calls. Tessa stops in her tracks, and spins around to face her mother storming down the hall after us. “Tessa, how could you say those things? How could you do that to your father?”

  “No, mother. How could you? I still remember the day I told you that he abused me, molested me. It took me days to be brave enough to admit it. Just like earlier, you told me that I just wanted attention. You told me that I should feel ashamed for lying and saying such mean and vile things about him. You said I didn’t need to resort to such evilness to get attention. Do you have any idea what you did to me?” Tessa takes a step forward and she’s practically nose to nose with the woman. “In that moment, my devastation was complete because I had lost two parents. And our relationship – if you can even call it that - has been a sad state ever since.”

  Her mom takes a step back and shakes her head, “You’re going to burn in hell for your lies, Tessa.”

  “No, mother, I’m not. Because I’m not lying. And neither were any of those fifteen other children, now adults. Wake the fuck up. You were here. You saw the evidence in his own writing. Isn’t it time you wake up? Don’t you think you deserve better? I feel sorry for you. Until you are ready to deal with what is right in front of your face, do not call me. I’m not taking your issues on too. You turned your back on me a long time ago. Today, I officially dismiss you from my life.”

  With that, she turns to me and takes my hand once again and we walk out of the building. As soon as we take a step outside, it’s as if we can both breathe again and we each take a deep breath. Without a word, I turn to her and pull her into my arms. One hand finds her hair and the other the top of her back, rubbing it in a soothing motion. We take comfort in each other. We pull apart and I look down into her beautiful face, “I am so proud of you. I know that wasn’t easy for you to do, but god woman, you were magnificent in your truth.”

  She smiles and my mouth falls open when she giggles. “I feel so free, Ryder. I’ve held that in for so long, when I got up there, it was bursting to come out of me. I don’t know what will be decided, but at least I know that this time, I spoke up. And it feels so good. I’m proud of myself.”

  “You should be.”

  “Let’s get out of here,” she says and we walk down the steps of the courthouse and make our way to my car. “You know what I want?”

  “Tell me,” I say.

  “Ice cream. Ice cream and sex. Lots of sex. I’m thinking that will be the perfect medicine.”

  Laughing out loud, I kiss her on the mouth and then groan in pleasure when she opens her mouth, granting permission for more. Pulling away, I look at her, take in her sparkling eyes, the smile on her lips, the happiness in her eyes and I know without a doubt that she’s okay. “Coming right up,” I tell her as I usher her into the car so we can get right on her request.

  Ryder flies into a parking space at the grocery store as close to the store as he can get. He barely has the car in park before he’s out of the car, and on my side of the car opening the door. He takes my hand to help me out, and then holds onto it as he walks with determination into the store. As soon as we hit the inside of the door, he takes off making me throw my head back and laugh out loud. “Come on!” he calls over his shoulder.

  “What are you doing?” I call after him.

  “I’m in a hurry!”

  He’s down the ice cream aisle in record time and when I get there, he already has the freezer door open and is pursuing the contents. “Chocolate? Or Vanilla?” He holds up a gallon of each for my inspection.

  “Neither.”

  “Neither?” he looks at me in confusion.

  “No.” I drop the smile from my face and look at him seriously, “I was thinking we could go for a threesome.”

  The ice cream in his hands nearly drops to the floor as his mouth drops open. “What?” He shakes his head no. “Why would you…?” he blinks rapidly, “No. I don’t want...I mean…”

  While he stumbles over his words, I reach past him, brushing against him as I do, and grab a different carton from the freezer. I’d hand it to him, but he’s still standing there holding the other two cartons rapidly blinking likely still trying to process my words. Laughing, I show him the carton I took from the freezer. “Hey, Playboy. I was talking about Neapolitan ice cream. What did you think I was talking about?”

  A big smile crosses his face and he gets rid of the other ice cream before he chases me all the way to the register.

  We race home and as soon as we’re through the door, Ryder goes to put the ice cream in the freezer, but I grab two spoons and raise my eyebrows. Taking it from him, I walk to the bedroom backwards, him following me step by step.

  Gina’s not home, thank goodness. The poor woman would be scarred for life if she were. We’ve been waiting a long few weeks for me to get through today. Just after Ryder and I gave into our desire for one another a few weeks ago, when we were just shy of our one-month challenge, I received the call from Jane. I was a stressed wreck when they told me there would be another, this time expedited, trial. I agreed to testify at the sentencing, knowing it was the right thing to do for me, but because of this, Ryder wanted to abstain from sex again.

  Initially, I was irritated. In those moments I needed him more than ever. Which is exactly why we waited. I need to break the habit of turning to sex as a way to bury my feelings. It was more important for me to work through them. I fell in love with Ryder even more for recognizing that. He’s an amazing man, and I count my blessings every day for him.

  Shutting the door behind us just in case, I set the ice cream down on the cedar chest at the end of my bed and then turn to face Ryder. With quick movements, I pull my shirt over my head. Ryder’s eyes flare at the sight of my breasts in a sheer pale pink bra. Smiling at him, I crook my finger at him. He comes to me immediately. Standing so close, my breasts touch his chest, I instruct, “Take your shirt off.” He raises his brows at me, but quickly follows my command.

  I put my fingers into the waistband of my skirt and let it fall to the ground and kick off my sandals, now standing before him in nothing but my bra and the sheer panties that match. “Holy fuck,” Ryder says as I do a spin for him with a smile.

  “You like?”

  “Mm,” he says as he reaches out a fingertip and touches the nipple of one breast making both of them stand at attention for him. Speaking of standing at attention, my eyes move to the bulge at the front of his pants. “Take off those too,” I nod toward his pants.

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  I watch as he removes them, kicks off his shoes and stands in his briefs. Raising a brow I move to him and trace a fingernail over the front of him. “And these too.” He puts his thumbs into the waistband of his briefs and I watch him slide them slowly down his hips, then down his thighs. I almost wish I could record this so I can view it any time I want for my pleasure.

  Standing gloriously in front of me, I take in his beauty. Gorgeous blue eyes shining at me with lust and love, so much love. Moving down his arms, I take in the beautiful art he has there. He’s shown me the tattoo that he got for Gina, and explained to me the meaning of some others. The dagger he has representing the first fight he won in the octagon, two arrows crossed to represent his friendship with the guys, a Polynesian tattoo on his upper arm that represents courage, a compass that reminds him that even during dark times to always find his way home – back to his true self. Each one represents something important to him, a living canvas, a homage to his life. My finge
r drags over the bandage that covers a new tattoo on the inside of his left arm. It’s for me. It’s a watercolor tattoo of a firework. It has red, blue, pink and yellow in it – it’s beautiful and colorful – just like me he says.

  “Lay on the bed,” I instruct and he moves so quickly, I laugh at him again. “You follow instructions well.”

  “Damn straight I do, firecracker. It’s been a long few weeks.”

  Grabbing the ice cream, I follow him to the bed. Straddling his body, I dip a spoon into the carton, and first, take a bite, savoring the sweet taste. Leaning down, I kiss Ryder, my cool tongue touching his warm one. It’s a toss up which is sweeter, his kiss or the ice cream on my tongue. “Delicious,” he says with a smile as I pull away. Dipping the spoon into the carton again, I hold his gaze as I let it drop down onto his chest. The first drop makes him jerk a little at the coolness touching him. He watches me with big eyes as I lean forward and slowly lap up drop after drop from his skin. “So sweet,” I tell him making him smile. Cocky now, in more ways than one, he puts his arms behind his head and enjoys watching me play.

  Dropping more ice cream, I pause to remove my bra, then lean down again to lick it up letting my breasts drag across his body as I move from drop to drop. Taking my fingertip, I scoop ice cream from the carton and glide the coldness across his cock. With a big smile, I lower to him, keeping my eyes on his the whole time. He bites his lip and it’s so sexy. I take him into my mouth and when he groans in pleasure, it makes me excited too. Moving up and down, I continue to give him as much pleasure as possible until he sits up and grabs me under my arms and lifts. To my surprise he lifts me right over his face and my crotch is right in his face. Moving my panties to the side, his tongue pleasures me and my head falls back between my shoulders as I grind my hips into his face. Just as I’m close to coming, he moves out from under me, slides my panties down my body and enters me swiftly.

  “Ah, god yes,” I say.

  “Fuck me, firecracker,” he murmurs.

  Sex with him is fucking fantastic. The combination of pleasure and love is nothing I’ve ever felt before and it makes me feel higher than any drug ever could. As he moves in and out, our bodies stick together from the melted and sticky ice cream. When they come apart, they make a sucking sound. Sweat mixes with sweet and it’s a recipe for complete satisfaction. When he rises to his knees for deeper access, his thigh muscles and biceps bulge. “God yes,” he mumbles when he’s at an even deeper angle. He begins moving in and out faster and it feels so fucking good.

  “Harder,” I tell him and he complies. We both find our release together and he collapses onto me.

  “Hell, Tessa. You make me crazy.”

  “It isn’t me. It’s my magical pussy.”

  He barks out a laugh, “Magical, huh? You may be right.”

  Laughing, as I watch him dispose of the condom then return to the bed, I turn to my side and kiss him on the lips. “I love you, Ryder. So much.”

  “I love you, too.”

  Running my fingers through his hair, we smile at each other, but then my smile falls and I become serious. He pulls me into his arms, my head lying on his chest. I’ve never felt more safe, more secure, or happier. He runs his fingers through my hair and my eyes flutter with the sensation. “One night at the hospital, a little girl was admitted into the emergency room. She couldn’t have been more than ten, and she had been beaten black and blue.” Ryder’s hand stills in my hair for a moment, and then he continues the soothing motion. “She’d been kidnapped. Taken right from the bus stop from a sick, sick man. Other children’s description of what happened helped the police piece together information about the man and the car he was driving. Between that and the Amber alert, they found the little girl not far from the bus stop, in the man’s basement. She was with him for a matter of hours, and in that time, he managed to hurt her enough for a life time.”

  “My god,” Ryder says under his breath. He keeps running his fingers through my hair, knowing I’m telling him this for a reason.

  “One night, her mother stepped out to get coffee. I told her I would keep an eye on her daughter. She was sleeping at the time, and it was a perfect opportunity for her mom to take a break. While the mother was gone, the daughter woke up from a nightmare. I know this because she woke up screaming. With my heart pounding in my chest, I ran into her room as fast as I could when I heard her screams from down the hallway.

  I comforted her and while she cried, she told me she was scared that the bad man was going to come there and get her again. I got into bed that hospital bed with her and promised her that I wouldn’t let the bad man get her. That she was safe with me.”

  Shifting, I turn in his arms and lay so that I’m facing him. “That was my a-ha moment. The moment I knew that being a nurse was exactly what I am supposed to be.”

  Moving toward me, his lips find mine. “The little girl, she’s okay?”

  I smile, loving his sensitivity, “She’s great. I actually still check in with her mom from time to time. I’ll never forget her, or that moment.”

  “Thank you for sharing that with me,” he whispers, pushing my hair back off my shoulder and leaning forward to place a kiss there.

  “Sure. I know that we didn’t quite make it to our one month challenge, but it’s still a part of me that I want to share with you.”

  He rolls over and hovers on top of me, “I’m about ready to share a part of me with you, again.”

  “Oh yeah?” I ask with a big smile.

  “Yep,” he says as he kisses me. Then kisses a freckle on my nose. Then one above my lip. Then another on my chest. “You saying hello to them again?”

  “No,” he says and then kisses one on my breast, “they just look like they miss me.”

  I laugh. It’s something I’m doing so much more now. And I make a promise right there and then, with him smiling down on me, and beginning to move within me, that I will spend my life making him laugh just as much in return.

  Placing my bag in the locker, I sit on the bench and begin my pre-fight routine to get in the frame of mind I need to win this fight. Rubbing my temples, I look up when I hear the door to the bathroom open and close expecting to see Cole ready to tape up my hands. Instead, Tessa’s there, a mischievous smile on her full lips. “Hey there, Ryder ‘Playboy’ King.”

  Laughing, I stand, “What are you doing back here?” It’s not that I’m not happy to see her, but she thought she would be running late from work and would get here right before fight time. “I was able to get out of work earlier than expected.”

  She places a bag she’s carrying down, and moves to me. I look at her curiously, not understanding what she’s wearing. “Did it finally start raining?” I ask. She doesn’t answer and instead she lifts her head in invitation. Never one to pass up an opportunity, I claim her mouth with my own. She tastes sweet and fruity and I greedily enjoy every sweep of her tongue, every nibble of her lips.

  As I pull away, I open my mouth to ask her a question, but she places a finger over my lips silencing me. The gesture makes me smile wide behind her finger. She smiles too and I know we’re both thinking of the same moment. That’s an encounter I will never ever forget and enjoy reliving it frequently.

  With a smile still on her face, her hands move to the belt at her waist and she undoes it, opening a jacket that seemed incongruent with the weather. It isn’t often you see a rainwear, let alone a trench coat, in Arizona. Underneath her red jacket, she’s wearing lace to match. My jaw drops at how beautiful she looks and I know a lesser man than me would fucking drool at the sight.

  She walks over to the long bench that’s in the room. Taking my hand, she pulls me to it. “Lay down,” she says and I do as I’m told like a good soldier. She lets the jacket slide off of her shoulders and to my delight while I’m lying down, she straddles my face. Looking down at me, she moves her own panties to the side and raises her brows. The instruction is clear and I take full advantage. Opening her wider, I lick from b
ottom to top. I circle her clit with my tongue and suck it into my mouth. She groans in pleasure and my already hard dick from seeing her lace covered body, hardens even further. She grinds her hips into my face and it isn’t long when she cries out into the room with her orgasm.

  Lifting her leg and moving, she unzips my pants and releases me from them. With one look at me, she removes her panties completely, then straddles me and slides down my length. We had the contraceptive talk and are now enjoying sex skin to skin and there is nothing like it. It feels so fucking good that I’m about ready to lose it after only a few hip rotations.

  “You feel so good, Ryder. So good.”

  “Ride me, firecracker. Hard.” I reach up and pinch her nipples making her cry out. She obeys and moves hard and fast and in moments she’s climaxing again, her head thrown back, her mouth open, her eyes squeezed closed. She’s beautiful in her complete ability to let go and just feel.

  As soon as she rides out the feeling, I sit up, move her off of me, and bend her over the bench, ass high in the air. I give it a smack, then as I stand behind her, I slide inside and begin pumping in and out. “Yes!” She yells, enjoying the feeling of being full of cock.

  I grip her hips in my hands, keep her still as I circle my hips a few times before slamming into her. Each time I hit her inner wall she breathes out and moans. A few more strokes and my fingers are clutched into her skin, my head thrown back as I pump my release into her.