Crazy In Love With A Thug: Bari and Seven

by LaDonna Robinson

  My heart dropped into my stomach as I pulled up in the driveway and saw Seven's Hummer parked there. I purposely blocked him in. He should be at work, I thought to myself as I let myself in the front door.

  "What took you so long?"

  My head jerked up, and I ran into the arms that were open for me.

  "Uncle Meestake!" I yelled and held him tightly.

  "Girl, you ain't nothing but bones! My mama would have a fit if she saw you. You're still beautiful as ever though." He smiled.

  "Why didn't you call? I would have picked you up," I said.

  "Seven got a driver's license. What I need you for? You better have had yo' butt at school."

  "I was at school, Uncle Meestake." I laughed, then looked past him at Seven and dropped my head.

  My laugh died in my throat, and tears came to my eyes. I missed him so much. I hadn't seen him in four days.

  "Now, listen here. Uncle Meestake ain't stupid. I know it's something going on around here. You standin' here lookin' like a pencil, and he ain't said a word to you since you came in the door. Uncle Meestake ain't tryin' to get in nobody's business, but y’all need to put that to the side and enjoy my visit. Y’all hear me?"

  I looked at Seven. He attempted to look back at me, found he couldn't do it, and picked up his keys.

  "I gotta get back to work. It's nice seeing you, man."

  He hugged Uncle Meestake and walked out. I tried to keep my uncle from seeing the tears running down my face.

  "You want to talk to your Uncle Meestake?" He had barely finished his sentence before I broke down crying and telling him the whole story. "Bari, what were you thinking?" He asked gently. "Don't know man I can think of want to see what's his up dancing on no stage in front of his friends. Not if he care anything about her. Bari, what you did for him was nice, but baby, you got to respect yo' man. And shakin' your body for other men ain't showing no respect. Not to mention that you're sixteen years old. Now, I know how me and my buddies act when we go to places like that down home, and I'm sure it ain't no different here. So, ain't no way in hell no man want to hear them thangs being screamed at his woman. Them kinds of thangs should be done in private, Bari. Do you understand?"

  I nodded miserably.

  "He won't talk to me. I can't even apologize to him, and I'm sorry you came right in the middle of this."

  "Don't you apologize to me. I'm gon' make myself at home no matter how y’all show out. Just don't go rippin' up my lucky shirt," he said and was dead serious.

  "I love you, Uncle Meestake. I'm so glad you're here."

  I hugged him tightly.

  "Is you gon' talk to that man?"

  "He doesn't stay in one place long enough for me to even try. This is my first time seeing him in a few days."

  "I can't say I blame him. He got to feel humiliated. I know I would. That was just dumb, Bari. You got more sense than that."

  "You're not making me feel any better," I informed him.

  "I'm not trying to," he said and did a George Jefferson walk up the stairs.

  I heard the shower running and decided to call Gucci.

  "Bari, what's up? This shit ain't cool, baby."

  "I know. I just don't know what to do. I think I've lost him, Gucci."

  “Not even."

  "I need to talk to him."

  "Then talk to him. Look, Bari. You're with a man. You're playing 'Big Girl' games so act like one. Make him talk to you. Six is all stressed out and shit, too. It's depressing."

  "I don't know where he is."

  "He's at Major and Birdie's."

  "See, that's what I mean. He said he had to go back to work."

  "He did go back to work, so did Six, but Six came home after, and Seven went to Birdie's. You would have known that if you'd tried to call, Bitch. Don't start that shit."

  "He asked for space. I'm trying to give him that."

  "Fuck what he asked for, give him what you want him to have. I love you."

  "I love you, too. Oh, my uncle is here. I want you and Six to meet him."

  "Meestake?" She asked excitedly. "When?"

  "I guess tomorrow. I have to check with Seven. I'll call you back when I know for sure."

  "Okay."

  We said our good byes, and I dialed the number to Seven's parent's house.

  "Bari, what's going on with yourself? Old Maja hears there's some trouble in paradise."

  "You hear right, and has anyone ever told you at hat your name is rally Major with an 'o-r' at the end?” I laughed, and he laughed with me.

  "That was cold. Young Bari is now a comedian! I want you and Seven to make things right. I don't like this nonsense."

  "I know, Major. Tell Birdie hi for me."

  "I will. Did you call for me or Seven?"

  "Both. Uncle Meestake is here, and I need to ask Seven when he wants everybody to come

  over.”

  "I'm coming tomorrow! I'm going to have a barbecue for Meestake!"

  "Can we come, too?" I asked sarcastically.

  "If you must. Here."

  I heard rustling in the background.

  "Yeah." My heart skipped fifteen point three beats. All I could say was, "Seven."

  Then I turned into the biggest crybaby on the face of the Earth.

  "Baby." I couldn't even answer him. A loud sniffle filled the phone line. "Baby?"

  "I gotta go," I cried.

  "Don't hang up, baby. Don't cry, okay? I don't want you crying."

  "What the hell do you expect, Seven? You know what? I don't want to talk to you."

  I hung up the phone, and he called right back. I let the machine pick it up.

  "Pick up the phone, Bari." I didn't. "Pick up the damn phone!"

  I wish I would. Have me boohooing like a damn two year old that dropped her ice cream cone in the sand box. Enough was e damn-nough.

  "Bari, pick up that phone."

  "No, Uncle Meestake. I already feel like a damn fool for what I did, then even more like a fool for calling all over the state of California trying to track down his ass. I shouldn't have to be playing private investigator to find my man."

  I listened to the dial tone.

  "Oh, Bari, Bari, Bari."

  "Uh-uh. I don't even want to hear that. I love you, Uncle Meestake, but this time, I'm blatantly disobeying you," I said. "Now, are you hungry?"

  "Hungrier than a fat man on a water diet." I laughed. "I sure have missed you, Bari. I finally finished sorting through Mama and Daddy's stuff. I decided not to sell the farm." I smiled. I was so glad. "I hired some men to work on it so it should be okay. I grew up in that house. I can't stand to let it go."

  "I understand, and I'm glad."

  "And guess what, Bari?"

  "What?"

  "No, you have to guess."

  "Can I get a hint or something?"

  ''Nope, you have to guess." I hated when people did that, and I glared at him. "Okay. Your Uncle Meestake done met him a woman." I gasped audibly. "Oh, is that so hard for you to believe? I gots charm when it come to the ladies now, Bari."

  "Oh no, I'm just shocked."

  "Well, don't be. She's a pretty woman, too. And can cook! Boy, can that girl tear a stove up!" He was off in his own world, smiling and laughing to himself, so I let him stay there. "I'm a ask her to marry me when I get back, Bari."

  "Why didn't you bring her?"

  "This is my time with my family. There's time for all that later. Right now, I just wanted to see my favorite niece. And b'sides, she done entered her peach cobbler in the county fair, and she wouldn't miss that for nuthin' in the world." He smiled.

  "I'm happy for you, Uncle Meestake."

  "What's that you cookin'? Sho' do smell good. Sho' do."

  "It's your favorite."

  "Naw! No you didn't, Bari. I can't believe you remembered," he said emotionally.

  "Of course I remembered; liver and onions, rice and gravy, lima beans and biscuits."

  "Girl, I love you. I wish you would
eat with me. You're so thin, Bari."

  "Don't worry about me, Uncle Meestake. I'll be fine. And you know I'm not about to let no liver touch these lips." I laughed.

  "You've never even tried it. You might like it."

  "No way, especially after Macy and Niecy and Mama told me that liver came from all the animals that were in the dog pound. That threw me off for a lifetime."

  "Aw, Bari."

  "So, what's her name?"

  "Her name is Marion."

  "Marion?"

  He nodded.

  "Beautiful, just beautiful; pretty blonde hair, bright blue eyes..."

  Did he say blonde hair and blue eyes? Dye and contacts?

  "She's white, Uncle Meestake?"

  "Is something wrong with that?"

  "You know better than to ask me something like that," I snapped.

  "Sorry, Bari. I know. I just love her, that's all."

  "I wouldn't care if she was gray with yellow polka-dots, as long as she keeps you happy."

  "That's something I really love 'bout'chu, Bari. You see the good in all people. And yes, she

  does make Uncle Meestake very happy, happier that I've been in my life."

  "Does she have a phone number? I'd like to call her sometime."

  "Really, Bari?"

  I nodded. He recited the number, and I wrote it down. I was setting Uncle Meestake's plate in front of him when I heard the front door close. I was through playing games. Who was the oldest here anyway?

  "Hey, Uncle Meestake."

  "What's up, man? This food sho' is good. Sho' is."

  I hadn't looked at Seven since he came through the door, and I had no intentions of doing so.

  ''Bari."

  "What?" I asked as I continued to clean up the kitchen.

  "Let Uncle Meestake just take his supper on up to his room." He picked up his plate and headed up the stairs. "Bari.”

  "Stop calling my name if nothing’s gonna follow. It's annoying. As a matter of fact, don't call it all. I have nothing to say to you."

  "What the fuck do you mean you ain't got nothing to say to me?"

  "Just what I said."

  "Bari."

  "There you go again," I said, throwing up my hands in exasperation.

  "You're starting to piss me off, Bari," he said quietly.

  "Join the fuckin' club, Seven."

  "Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?"

  "Well, let's see, here I am, and there you are. That makes two, and I'm not talking to myself!"

  "You need to calm your ass down."

  "You need to leave me the hell alone. I can't believe you've treated me like this, Seven. I thought you loved me, but how could you love me if you can't even stand to look at me? Isn't that why you stay gone so much? You feel like you're with a ho now, don't you? Well, maybe I was wrong about how I went about it, but it was still all for you. You can't see that though. All you're focused on is that your sorry ass friends saw your girl in a short dress shaking her ass. So fuckin' what! I did it for you! I don't sneak off to no damn clubs and dance for money behind your back! I've barely seen you for five minutes out of this whole week. And you know what, Seven? I'm getting used to you not being around," I lied.

  "Bari. . . "

  "No, don't even say anything, because now, it doesn't matter. When I needed you here to say my name, you weren't here, so don't say it now. It's too late. You've shown me how it's gonna be every time you get mad. You're going to abandon me every time you dislike something, and I don't need that. I've had enough abandonment in my life to last twenty people a lifetime."

  Tears came to my eyes, and I forced them back. I wouldn't let him see me cry, not ever again.

  "You don't have no fuckin' reason to call yourself being mad at me! I'm not the one that got up on that stage and did that shit, you did! You might as well had laid down and opened your legs and let one of them fools fuck you up there! It wouldn't have been no different!" I felt like he had slapped me. "And you know what, Bari?" His voice was barely above a whisper. "I used to look at you as my baby, 'my' baby. And I had bragged about you to them very same people that I was sitting with that night, but that night, I saw you as I see every other ho I know, and I never thought that was possible." His voice was cracking, and I could tell he was fighting tears. Tears poured from my eyes, and a strange sound escaped my throat. "I was humiliated, Bari. I was embarrassed for myself and for you, and I haven't been able to look at you the same since then. I can barely look at you at all. I'm just keepin' it real. I'm not trying to hurt you. I love you. I'll always love you, Bari."

  I wiped my eyes and looked directly into his.

  "Your father is having a barbecue for my uncle tomorrow. He's flying back on Sunday. After that, you won't have to ever see this 'ho' again."

  "Bari..."

  "No. No, Seven. It's over. I'm moving out of here. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to hear about it. I just want to go, and I'm asking you to respect that."

  I was dead serious, and he knew it. He stood there and stared at me for a long time.

  "I don't think I can give you that, Bari."

  "You don't have a choice, Seven." I said, and brushed by him and up the stairs.

  I cried like I had never cried in my life. My heart was truly broken, and there was no fixing it. Not now, not ever. I laid there on my bed, feeling as though I were dying inside. I had never experienced such pain, never knew it even existed. I knew one thing for sure though, I didn't want to be here anymore. I picked up my phone book and dialed my daddy's lawyer. When he picked up the phone, I identified myself and asked him if he had any news for me about the big house.

  "I called about two weeks ago and spoke to Seven. I guess he forgot to tell you. Everything is cleared, and you can move anytime."

  I was in shock. Seven hadn't even mentioned it.

  "Thank you so much." I hung up the phone, stormed down the stairs and found Seven on the couch. "Why in hell didn't you tell me the lawyer called?" I had never been so mad in all my life. His face showed no surprise, not anything. "You knew I'd been waiting on that call, Seven. How could you do me like that? And you stood there and said I'm just like everybody else? You're no different from anyone else either. Trish, Darshon and the rest of the people that are made up from that same fucked up pedigree."

  "You got me fucked up, for real. I ain't nothin' like none of them mutha fuckas."

  "I can't tell, but it doesn't really matter. What's done is done."

  I picked up my keys off the hook.

  "Where you going, Bari?"

  "None of your damn business. And you need not ever concern yourself with where I'm going or what I'm doing again. I wouldn't want to embarrass you or anything by acting less than perfect!"

  I slammed the front door behind me. I no sooner had my key in the door than he came out behind me.

  "Bari, wait. We need to talk."

  "We've been needing to talk for the past six fuckin' days, Seven. It's too late for talking now. I don't want to talk. I don't need to talk."

  "Where the fuck are you going?"

  ''None of your damn business."

  "Baby, wait....”

  "I've been waiting a whole week already, Seven. My waiting days are over. Bye."

  I slid in behind the wheel of my hunter green Land Rover, a present from Seven, and if he thought I was leaving it behind he was out of his mind. His Hummer was parked next to it, and I wished my Land Rover was an Army tank so I could roll over the top of it.

  I glanced in the rear view. The look on his face made me want to turn around and run back into his arms, but hell no, not in a million years. I loved Seven more than the air I was breathing. I just couldn't deal with knowing I had caused him disappointment. He was my whole world and universe, and now I wasn't shit to him. I would rather never see Seven again than to have to see disgust in his eyes every time he looked at me.

  Chapter 32

  I wasn't sure where I was going. I drove aro
und for a while, then headed up into the cliffs of the Pacific Palisades. I got out and sat on the hood, gazing up into the stars that were shining above and down at the lights shimmering below. I ignored the ringing of my cell phone, not even wanting to find out who it was. I knew my uncle would be worried about me, but I couldn't go back. My pride wouldn't let me.

  The chill in the air punked me into leaving after about two hours. The time had gone so fast. Seven was blowing my pager to pieces, and I wasn't about to answer it. Then he pulled the lowest trick I'd ever seen. He paged me and left my uncle's name. I picked up my cell and reluctantly dialed the number.

  "Bari!"

  "Uncle Meestake, I'm fine."

  "Where are you?"

  "Just out driving. Don't worry about me."

  "Bari, you need to come home. It's dark out there, and I done heard what fools do to each other after dark in California. Please, come home."

  "Okay, Uncle Meestake."

  If l didn't go home, he would worry himself to death.

  "And, Bari, stop somewhere and get Uncle Meestake a bucket of chicken, would you?"

  He hung up the phone. I stopped at KFC and bought his chicken and some things to go with it. I knew Seven hadn't eaten yet either.

  "You ain't eatin'?" Uncle Meestake asked.

  "I'm not hungry."

  I set the food on the table and headed for the stairs.

  "Bari, you need to eat!" He yelled after me.

  I needed to get away from Seven, who was sitting across the table from my uncle. He looked so good. His dreads were hanging down around his shoulders, and he wore a tan wife beater and tan Calvin pajama bottoms.

  I sat on my bed with my head in my hands thinking about Seven and how we had ended up. A knock on the door jolted me back to reality.

  "I'm not hungry, Uncle Meestake." I said, too tired to look up at him.

  "It's me. You need to eat, Milkshake." Seven said gently, coming to sit next to me on the bed. "You're getting so small, baby."