With or Without You (The Dom's of The Cage Book 4)

by P Nelson

  Thea, with the resources of Linkin at her disposal, had been searching for Esposito on her own. They had several solid leads, but they had all come to nothing. He put away the groceries and entered the living room.

  “Any progress?” he asked casually even though Linkin would have informed him if there had been a break in the case. Dillon had spoken to Linkin privately to ensure he stayed in the loop of the investigation. Thea had become a single-minded machine about anything to do with the case. It was like trying to pull an ice cream away from a toddler even to get a snippet of information.

  “No.” Thea sat back in her chair. Her face had healed nicely and after a couple of appointments with the dental surgeon, she no longer needed the bridge with false teeth. Her skin was free of staples and stitches. The scarring across her back was a painful reminder of the physicality of the abuse she suffered, but the marks on her thighs, stomach and breasts were not as noticeable. Dr Selkirk believed it was because they were not as deep. Dillon wanted to know how deep the psychological scars cut, but she refused to speak with him.

  “He can’t hide forever; we know what he looks like and have frozen all of his accounts.” Dillon assured her for the hundredth time.

  “Flynn thinks he has access to another source of funds.” Thea stopped staring at the screen and pushed her chair away from the desk. She spent all her waking moments in front of the computer, which was some serious time since she hardly slept anymore. They had started off in separate bedrooms, but after the first night when Thea woke up screaming her lungs raw in a nightmare, they shared a bed. Nothing sexual passed between them. Hell, Dillon hadn’t even laid eyes on her naked body. She just needed someone she trusted beside her while she slept for a few precious hours.

  “Linkin told me he thinks Esposito planned for this exact possibility.” Dillon nodded his head. “He’s a clever asshole. I’ll give him that. But he can’t hide forever, unless he’s planning on some serious plastic surgery. Linkin has tapped into a network of cameras at various airports around North America as well as the rest of the world. He can’t hide from our tech spider.” Thea smiled at the moniker Dillon had bestowed on Linkin after seeing his setup. The man was a spider lurking on the internet waiting for Esposito to trip into one of his webs.

  “He hates that nickname,” Thea reminded Dillon.

  “Because it fits.” Dillon took a deep breath. He had to speak to her about their plans for the evening, and he would prefer to teach a classroom of baby Doms how to properly apply nipple clamps. “Are you sure you want to go tonight?” Thea continued to stare at him.

  “Of course, I’m going tonight.” He heard sheer determination and grit behind every word. No thread of excitement that the evening might be enjoyable. Only a need to see it through.

  “You don’t have to make an appearance,” Dillon reminded her again.

  “Yes, I do.” Thea stood up from the desk and looked him straight in the eye. They were the same height, and Dillon had always found she could glare at him straight on sexy as hell. “The Feather Flogger is the oldest, most respected kink dungeon available to the public in Vancouver. I’m going tonight to support my community. Our whole lifestyle has been under threat for months; people need to see members like me come out and support them.”

  “You haven’t even been to The Cage yet. And now you want to go back to the place where that bastard abducted you,” Dillon spoke softly.

  “That’s because I’m not ready to go back to work yet, and I’m keeping a low profile as requested by the police department.” Thea’s words were angry. “I have kept away from my duties at The Cage, but this is the last time Master Lovett will be opening the doors of The Feather Flogger. I have a responsibility. And he didn’t take me from The Feather Flogger. It was in the parking lot.”

  It was the same argument she had made the one other time Thea had left the apartment in the three months she had remained here. He decided to leave the thorny issue of The Feather Flogger and her abduction.

  “This isn’t going to be like Bondie’s funeral,” she assured him.

  “Well, that’s a relief.” Not able to hold back on the sarcasm, he said, “because I enjoy being attacked with handbags and threatened to have some brutish asshole give me a matching black eye.” Flynn had informed them of Bondie’s funeral a few days after Thea’s release from the hospital. Thea had been just as adamant as now in attending in the funeral.

  “I had to go. I saw him die for fuck’s sake,” Thea stubbornly insisted. It was the same argument as before.

  “It wouldn’t have been as bad if the media hadn’t decided to crash the venue and expertly capture the tension between Bondie’s lifestyle friends and his clearly shocked parents who were only learning of their son’s kinks as well as dealing with his death.

  “You’re right. And if you think it’s not going to be a media circus tonight, think again, my beauty.” Dillon moved out of her way as she strode past him through the darkening living room and into the hall leading towards the bedrooms.

  “Good; I want Esposito to see me,” Thea called out. Dillon chased after her.

  “Fuck, Thea, you don’t have to wear a pair of balls all the time.” He caught up with her as she headed for the bedroom they shared. She had gone into the crazy-big walk-in closet. Dillon stayed in the main room and sat on the bed giving her some space.

  “It’s not about having balls, Dillon. I want this asshole. I want him so fucking bad I can smell his breath on my skin, feel his hands on my flesh. The only way I’ll ever feel safe again is to know I snuffed the life out of him with my bare fucking hands.” Thea came out of the walk-in closet carrying several pieces of black clothing.

  “I don’t think you’re physically strong enough to strangle anyone to death.” Dillon pointed out she had just begun her workouts at the gym again, complaining the whole time of how sore and out of shape she was.

  “Don’t be pedantic.” Thea pressed her lips together, unhappily glaring at him for a full minute before throwing the stack of clothing she held in her arms on the bed.

  “I’ll be whatever I want when it comes to your safety. The police department still has you under twenty-four/seven surveillance. Your partner detective, whatever his name is, isn’t altogether useless. He’s made some progress where Linkin had been stonewalled.” Dillon waved a vague arm over the city. “It’s not safe for you to be out there.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous, Dillon.” Thea sorted through garments on the bed, lifting them up and creating two piles. “It’s not less or more safe than hanging around in this apartment day and night.” She pulled one pile of clothing towards her and held up a slinky see-through teddy. Dillon swallowed hard and adjusted the front of his jeans. He had sported a raging hard-on for the past few days unable to convince his unruly cock that Thea was off limits. “Besides I thought you wanted me to go out more.”

  “Sounds like you’re bored. If you’re bored we can go out tomorrow, during daylight hours when the VPD officers downstairs and the scary ass motherfuckers Linkin has watching you can do their jobs properly.” Dillon warmed to his subject. “In fact, there’s a juice bar that just opened down the street. We could go after the morning rush.” For a minute, Dillon wallowed in the fantasy that he and Thea were just like every other couple. They would have breakfast together in hipster cafes and go for jogs together.

  “Are you imagining us jogging together again? Because you know I think jogging is for yummy mummies and other trendy dicks trying to get into their Lycra-covered pussies.” He caught Thea’s grimace.

  “I want it noted that I don’t think you’re ready for this.” Dillon crossed his arms over his chest.

  “Calla thinks I am,” Thea shot back.

  “As your friend or your therapist?” Dillon’s dry question went unanswered. “Just as I thought.” He stood up and entered the walk-in closet. Unlike Thea, Dillon had been down at The Cage several times a week covering her shifts as Domme in Residence. Several of the more senior
Masters at The Cage had volunteered in the wake of Thea’s abduction. It was great to see dominants like Master Gaige, Master Eric, and even Master Keith step up and become more involved in the dungeon. It showed the community was stronger than ever. Grabbing a pair of leather pants, Dillon came out of the bedroom to find Thea undressing.

  “Jesus.” The word escaped before he could clamp his mouth shut.

  “It’s the scars, right.” Thea was facing away from him. Her shoulders hunched over. Dillon didn’t even think. Walking over to the woman he wanted more than any other in his storied and impressive list of bed mates, he set his lips to the top of the scar on her right shoulder. It ran down all the way to the top of her ass. Thea flinched but didn’t move.

  “The scars make you a survivor, Thea. Nothing more, nothing less.” He trailed a row of kisses down the puckered skin. She held her breath, and Dillon continued. She had a safe word and knew how to use it. Blood throbbed hot and steady in Dillon’s temples. This was the first sexual contact between them since before her abduction. Even then it had been months since they’d fucked. Bending his knees, Dillon squatted behind Thea, the globes of her ass right in front of his face. He wanted to part her ass cheeks and play with her asshole. Insert a finger inside the sensitive tissues, but understood she wasn’t ready yet. She had to explicitly tell him what she wanted.

  Dillon forwent the pleasure of her asshole and concentrated on another scar leading from the top of her ass up her spine. This time, Dillon licked up her body, and she shivered in pleasure. He smiled. This is what he wanted: to give her pleasure and help her relax. Thea understandably was tense. Her shoulders barely left her ears most days as she hunkered in front of the elaborate computer system Linkin set up for her. She needed to have an orgasm to relieve some of the stress. Whether she would let him give her one was another matter entirely.

  Reaching the top of her shoulder again. Dillon hesitated for a moment. “Do you want more?” The question sounded intimate in the hushed room. He would stop, of course. His hard cock would be painful as hell, but he would drop this light seduction if she couldn’t handle it.

  “No. Don’t stop. I like your mouth on me.” He heard her struggle and was about to get up and walk away, but she reached a hand out. “He never used his mouth on my back. Only on my face. I need to feel sexy again.”

  “You are sexy, beautiful.” Dillon opened his mouth wide and lavished the back of her neck with open-mouthed kisses. The hairs on Thea’s neck rose, and Dillon continued his assault on her senses. He let his chest touch her naked back wishing he weren’t wearing any clothing. Then again, he would probably come in his jeans if her sinfully sweet skin pressed against his own. He couldn’t see Thea’s nipples, but his were as hard as fucking marbles. She’d sense his growing lust for her.

  &

  Thea battled her instinct to shout out her safe word to enjoy the pleasure Dillon was heaping on her senses. When he swore earlier, it had brought up all of Thea’s insecurities about her body. Ones she had never had to deal with before Esposito had cut and flayed her skin. Even though she was determined as hell not to let the scars bother her, it was hard. The thought of even a passive rejection from the man licking and nibbling her skin made her eyes water. Again.

  In the past few days, she had a gnawing hunger invade her bones. Dillon had snored softly beside her every night he’d been home. At first, it was the warmth of his body. She felt reassured by his presence protecting her. The feeling had morphed somewhere along the way to a soul-deep need to be in the same room with him, feel his presence near her. Many times, during the past few months, she had wanted to get up from behind the computer screen, abandon her pursuit of Esposito to stand near Dillon. She wanted to call out to him ten times a day and find out what he was doing. In so many incalculable ways, he invaded her everyday life until now she wasn’t sure whether she could go back to her solitary life once this nightmare was over.

  “What do you want, Thea?” The gravelly question rasped over her nerves, and she shivered as if she were a newbie sub. What the hell did she want? The fire burning in her pussy wanted release. But she had to seriously take the advice Calla had given her. Thea was repressing her feelings and residual trauma of her abduction. Until she dealt with it properly, she was liable to hurt Dillon in ways their relationship might never recover from.

  “I want to feel your naked chest on my back.” Thea sighed once the words were out. Yes, Dillon’s washboard abs and his lean hips and no doubt raging erection pressing into her ass cheeks was what she wanted.

  “Your slave, as always.” The heat of Dillon’s mouth on her shoulder receded for a minute, and she lifted her gaze from the comforter to look into the floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the night skyline of Vancouver. Twilight had ended, and now the city glowed with pulsing lights of life. The tower blocks overlooking the teeming city streets of citizens out for the evening, the summer practically over now. She had missed it, sitting in her enforced seclusion. A quick movement and Dillon was pressing his burning skin against her back, Thea had no more time for thoughts of other people. They gasped together.

  “Do you like how this feels, beautiful?” he asked rubbing his chest against her. Thea had to concentrate to get the verbal answers out of her mouth.

  “Yes, Dillon.” Thea inhaled deeply. It did feel good to have this connection. Since the hug they shared on the hospital bed, Dillon had only given her quick kisses and fleeting caresses, nothing like the potent feel of skin on skin.

  “What else would you like me to do?” He sucked her earlobe and ran his roughened tongue all around it. She moaned and couldn’t stop her hips from pushing back into his cock. It was hard enough that it sat perfectly in between her ass cheeks. It was big and when he took her, would possess her in ways no other dick had or will ever.

  “Knead my breasts. Pinch my nipples.” Thea instructed shutting all thoughts of the Reverend down. This was her time, time she wanted to spend with the man she wanted above all others. With solitary focus, she concentrated on Dillon’s hands coming around the side of her body.

  “Raise your arms, put your hands behind your head.” Dillon instructed, his hands waiting on her hips. Thea told her brain to raise her arms. They didn’t move. She tried to force her body into action, but her hands remained stubbornly at her sides. Her mind and her pussy might crave Dillon’s touch, but her body was not going to let it be put into a vulnerable position again.

  “I can’t.” Thea sounded ragged, the two words coming out on a sob.

  “It’s fine.” Dillon hadn’t moved his hands. “Where are you?”

  “I’m green, Dillon,” she replied automatically.

  “Do you want to stop?” He pressed. It annoyed Thea that Dillon didn’t take her green light signal as a sign to press forward. He was treating her like a newbie sub. Before she could admonish him, he blew air on the back of her neck.

  “Yes, please Dillon,” The strangled words filled up the room.

  “Perfect, beautiful.” Dillon’s hands swept slowly up from her hips, over her lower stomach and rested on her ribcage, underneath her breasts for a minute. He squeezed his fingers lightly into her flesh before raising them to cup her breasts. At first, he only held onto the weighty globes. She waited patiently. He kneaded her flesh, rewarding her patience. The feeling went straight between her legs making her sizzling and wet. The folds of her pussy readying to welcome the cock sitting in between her ass cheeks.

  “You want me to pinch these?” Dillon asked a second before his fingers lightly captured both of her nipples rolling them around in his fingers, the pleasure causing her central nervous system to shut down. Adrenaline shot through her a moment later, bringing the whole experience to an excruciating peak.

  “What do you want me to do now?” Dillon asked still behind her, only his hands giving her breasts and nipples exquisite pleasure. She needed to come. Normally, she wasn’t shy about asking. She was a Domme. Thea didn’t need to ask. All she had to do was o
rder a sub between her legs in whatever fashion she wanted, and he would work her flesh until she came whether she wanted his cock, his mouth, his fingers, or all three. She was in absolute charge of her release. In return, if the sub had been a good little boy, Thea would see to his pleasure making sure it hurt and burned for ecstasy to reign. Now, she wanted to come but didn’t know how to get there without ruining the moment by explaining or with bringing up memories of Esposito.

  Maybe she should trust Dillon. Trust him to give her what she wanted. Subs trusted him all the time. He was a well-liked Dom at The Cage as well as a highly sought-after porn star. He was well-versed in what he was doing when it came to pleasuring women’s bodies.

  “I want to come.” Thea held her breath as she said the words.

  “Do you?” Dillon squeezed her nipples, not with enough pressure to cause pain, but enough to force her body into squashing them further into his hands. “I know you’re not ready for my cock, beautiful, even though I want to be inside of you more than anything. When the time comes, I’m going to have you begging for my dick.”

  “Promise?” She wasn’t a newbie sub even though he was treating her like one. Thea was just as experienced in the art of foreplay, kink, and dirty talk as Dillon. Perhaps it was time to show him exactly who he was taunting. “Because right now the thought of sucking the head of your dick in my mouth and wrapping my tongue around just enough of the head and squeezing sounds like a good plan to me.”

  “Fuck, Thea. The dirty, nasty things I want to do to you.” His body responded to her words by starting a slow rhythm, humping her ass cheeks. “Take off your panties and spread your legs wide, beautiful. I’m going to give you everything you need despite you’re being a brat of the first order.” Thea laughed and immediately stopped. It was only the second genuine feeling of mirth to come out of her body. The first while she tangled with Bill at the hospital. “That’s it, beautiful. Be here and now. I want you to think of all the ways I’m going to make that pussy of yours sing for me.”