I Take It Back

by Liza James

  “HELL YES.”

  “YOU FUCKED CADE?”

  “FUCK YEAH, EMMA. No wait, FUCK YEAH, BAMBI.”

  Humiliated, I covered my reddening face in my hands and mumbled through my fingers, “Shh! Shh! And we didn’t have sex! We just ... fooled around! Now shut up before Lo—”

  “What the hell is going on out here?!” Logan was barreling through the bedroom door, standing there with no shirt on and in his black boxers.

  Logan was definitely an attractive guy, Savannah had always had good taste. His lean, athletic build showcased a perfect six-pack and muscular arms. But while I could appreciate his appearance, my mind couldn’t help but instantly make comparisons to the strong, broad shoulders I was clinging on to last night while I came all over Cade’s hand.

  We both paused and stared at Logan silently, not entirely sure how to answer his question.

  “Sorry, we were ... uh ... practicing Emma’s monologue for—”

  “Okay, there’s no use in trying to hide it from me. I woke up to the loudest ‘YOU FUCKED CADE’ I’ve ever heard before ... and that’s saying something because I’ve been around the guy and all of his conquests for years now.” His tone was laced in mild humor as he tried to swallow back a laugh.

  An embarrassed groan fell from my lips, and I leaned back on the couch, covering my face with my arms. “Both of you, let’s stop talking about this. Also, Logan ... we didn’t fuck. So just get that straight in your head right now.”

  “Wait wait wait ... did you get off?” Savannah asked eagerly.

  “Oooh, did you have your first orgasm, Em? That’s exciting!” Logan said as he took a seat next to Savannah. He pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her waist.

  I shot Sav a deadly glare in response to the fact that somehow Logan knew I had never had an orgasm before.

  What the hell, Sav?

  Her apologetic face met mine as she mouthed the words, “I’m sorry.”

  “Both of you shut up. We’re done talking about this.” I groaned, trying to avoid any further interrogation, and I shifted to stand up off the couch.

  “Oh, shit you did!” Suddenly Savannah’s arms were wrapped tightly around me as she forced us to jump in celebratory unison. “See, that short dress was the right choice after all.” She smirked, clearly proud of the options she had provided.

  “Oh crap, by the way, that dress is still at the frat house ... in Tyler’s room. I didn’t want to sneak back up there and have him wake up before I left. Hence, Cade’s clothes,” I said, motioning up and down myself.

  “Those are Cade’s? He let you take his clothes?” Logan sounded genuinely surprised, his eyes widening at what I just said.

  “Yes? It was that or I ride in my Uber completely naked and obviously, that wasn’t happening.”

  “Huh. Interesting,” was his only response.

  “What? You can’t say that and not give any sort of explanation,” I stated, my arms crossing over my chest as I try to power stance him.

  “Yeah Logan! Who do you think you are? That’s code!” Savannah said, begging him with her eyes to explain further.

  Logan chuckled and continued with his thought. “It’s just interesting. He’s never, and I mean never, let any girl he’s hooked up with borrow his clothes. It’s just his thing. Girls try to possessively wear his shirts at parties or even his boxers to sleep in and he absolutely refuses. I’ve had to give my clothes out countless times to his girls because I know he won’t ever do it. So, I’m shocked he gave those to you. But who knows, people change. Maybe he’s turning over a new leaf.” Logan leaned down to plant a sweet kiss on Savannah’s forehead as he stood up and walked back the bedroom. “I’m going to back to bed, please for Christ sake, keep it down out here?”

  “We will, babycakes,” Savannah said before turning back toward me, a smile wide across her face.

  “Wow. Who would have thought, my little girl has finally grown up. Having her first orgasm, hooking up with two guys in one night, getting wasted, and stealing a guy’s clothes that no other woman has ever touched? If I didn’t know any better ... I’d say I’d have to learn a few things from you, girlfriend.” Savannah had her hands planted firmly on her hips, with one cocked out to the side.

  “Oh my gosh, no ... just no. I hope you know that last night’s party was enough wild to last me the next three years at least. So, no more wild nights for this girl,” I said, completely serious as I turned to head to bed for the first time in twenty-four hours. The tiny hairs on the back of my neck pricked up at Savannah’s last words before I shut the door behind me.

  “Oh sweetie, we’re just getting started.”

  Chapter 14

  It was Wednesday afternoon and I was racing through campus in order to get to my monologue audition on time. It was also blustery outside, so the wind was whipping stray strands of my hair across my face, blocking my vision as I accidently stumbled into someone walking in the opposite direction. I didn’t recognize her, but her books spilled out of her arms onto the cold pavement below us.

  “Shit, I’m so sorry. I’m in a hurry,” I said, quickly grabbing a couple of books and pushing them toward her as I continued rushing to the auditorium.

  I finally reached the double doors with only three minutes to spare and pulled them wide open, stepping inside the dark theater. Warm spotlights spilled onto the stage ahead of me and someone was already auditioning. The room was almost completely silent as I made my way down the narrow pathway between rows of old, burgundy upholstered chairs. I scanned the few faces who were seated ahead of me and saw one of my closest friends, Jake—another theater nerd—and nudged in past him so I could take a seat.

  “Damn, Em. I thought you weren’t going to make it,” he leaned over and whispered into my ear. His lap was covered with his monologue notes, and I could see that he had scribbled all over it in bright red ink.

  “You wish I didn’t make it,” I said, a light chuckle filling my voice. I quietly unzipped my bag and pulled out my printed monologue so that I could go over lines while I anxiously awaited my turn.

  “You’re right, I do wish you missed auditions. Then I’d have a better chance of getting mine selected for the showcase.” He grinned, squeezing my hand in friendly reassurance. Jake and I had been in theater together for the last two years. He was one of my best friends, and we both connected initially on the fact that we were both incredibly nervous for our first audition. We ended up studying and practicing lines together in order to prepare, and it became our normal routine for the rest of our friendship. He was incredibly talented, so I knew for a fact his monologue was going to get picked up for the showcase. He had already won several awards and starred in a few big plays in the city.

  We both sat in silence, studying our lines until each of us was called to perform. I would have to say that we both did a pretty powerful job with our dramatic pieces, and I was thankful for all of the time we’d spent studying together. Our coach seemed pleased with our performances, so we quietly packed our bags and headed out through the back door.

  “My stomach feels like it’s going to eat me from the inside out. Can we grab a quick bite to eat?” Jake asked as we shut the door behind us. But just as I was about to answer, my eyes met the gaze of someone leaning against the wall of the building in front of us.

  Tyler was standing there, holding something long and black over his arm as he gave me a slight nod when ours met.

  “Uh, do you know him?” Jake asked, glancing back and forth between the two of us.

  My heartrate picked up a bit and those little nerves started fluttering around in my stomach. I couldn’t tell if I was happy to see him standing there or if I was disappointed and wanted to run and hide. Probably a little bit of both if I were being honest. He was genuinely sweet, and I did have a lot of fun hanging out with him before the hookup. I could imagine that he would be a good friend to have, but I didn’t know how he would handle being friend-zoned by me.

  �
�Yeah, a little. Give me one moment, okay? Then we can go grab food,” I said as I took a step away from Jake hurried toward Tyler.

  I stopped just a few feet in front him and noticed that the black cloth hanging over his arm was the dress I left in his room the other night.

  “Hi,” I said, absentmindedly fidgeting with my hands.

  “Hey there, pretty lady. I just wanted to give you back your dress,” he said, a slight smile resting on his face. He stepped forward and offered his arm to me so that I could take the small black dress from him.

  As I leaned forward to pull my dress out of his hands, I stumbled through my response, “Ah, thanks. I’m sorry I left so early ... I just do-”

  “Don’t do morning after’s? It’s okay, I remember.” He offered a gentle, sweet nod of acknowledgement and I could tell he truly meant that. “But I was actually wondering something else. Are you going to the after party on Friday? It’s at The Lift.”

  The After Party? Oh, he must be referring to the football game on Friday.

  Grandview was home to one of the best college football teams in the country. Our team was kicking ass this season and the entire campus had been buzzing with energy for the upcoming game. Football was the heart of Grandview, and the games were events everyone participated in. This week’s game was against one of our top rivals, Greenford Uni, and a home game at that. So, I was sure the after party was going to be huge. Savannah and I didn’t go very often, our schedules were usually jam-packed with auditions for me, reading for Sav, and labs and studying for us both. But with the rival game being this week, I was pretty confident Sav would want to hit the town.

  “The football after party, right? Savannah and I might be. It just depends on our schedules. Are you going?” I must have still been fidgeting with my hands because all of a sudden Tyler’s hand was resting on mine, stopping me from tearing my skin apart.

  He laughed a bit to himself before continuing. “Yeah I’ll be there. I was actually going to see if you wanted to go together?” His voice was hopeful, confident in the way he intently gazed into my eyes. I couldn’t help but feel the tiny flip my heart did when he asked.

  God my feelings were so confusing.

  Did I like the guy or not? I didn’t like how I felt after we hooked up, that’s for sure. I also didn’t like crashing in his bed afterward. But I was also decently drunk that night, so was he. So maybe it was just alcohol?

  Fuck, I don’t know.

  Cade made me feel so differently later that night and the reminder sprung a tiny spark of guilt in my chest over how I left Tyler.

  “Actually, Savannah and I always go to those things together ... I’m sorry, it’s just a weird pact we have. But maybe we could grab coffee next week instead?” I lied, I just wasn’t sure how I felt yet, and I didn’t know if I wanted our first date to be in such a public setting, surrounded by fellow students and people we mutually knew. I needed to sort through my mind before making things so public with him if that was what I wanted.

  I didn’t miss the flicker of disappointment in his eyes, but he quickly recovered and the hurt was replaced with satisfaction.

  “Of course, I totally understand. Coffee it is, then. Here, give me your phone.” He placed his hand palm up in front of me and, without a word, I did what he said, handing my phone to him. He swiped up and tapped a few things on the screen before handing it back.

  “There, I texted myself from your phone so you have my number. I’ll see you at the party, then?” That warm, familiar smile was back on his face, and I was surprised by the warmth I was feeling around him as well.

  “Sure, I’ll see you around, Tyler.” Smiling back, I turned on my heels and headed over to Jake, who looked more than annoyed at the length of my conversation. Right before I said something, the loud growl of his stomach ripped through the air and he glared at me.

  “See? The monster has awoken.” We both laughed and I linked my arm through his as we headed toward the café on campus.

  Chapter 15

  As we walked into the bustling café, I scanned the crowd for Savannah. I knew her class let out around four PM, so she should be here any minute. We moved toward the line forming down the center of the building and, as soon as I saw Savannah’s dark auburn hair bouncing through the far door, I waved and motioned her over to us.

  “Well, hello there, my two most favorite people.” She leaned forward and planted a kiss on Jake’s cheek and then leaned over to give me a welcoming hug.

  “Hi there, sugar,” he said before he turned to place his order at the counter.

  “Hey, we’re going to the game on Friday, right? There’s a big after party happening at The Lift afterward.” I knew before I even asked that Sav would be on board. But her perky, enthusiastic response always made me feel like we were about to do something new and thrilling.

  “Oh, hell yeah. I wouldn’t expect anything less than fabulous for that night, Em. We’re going round two on shots and orgasms.”

  I rolled my eyes as I stepped toward the counter to place my order with the waitress. Grabbing a turkey panini and small coffee, Jake and I waited for Savannah to place her order before we went to find a table to eat our lunch.

  When the waitress brought us our food, Jake and Savannah were already deep in conversation about best blow job techniques. ‘How much teeth is too much teeth?’ seemed to be the main focus of the discussion, and I found myself chuckling as I listened to their back and forth banter.

  “I’m telling you, just the tiniest bit will make a massive difference. You’ll have him coming in literally no time,” Jake pointed out dryly.

  “And I’m telling you, there’s no way any guy on this planet enjoys sharp teeth dragging down his hard dick.”

  “Damn girl, I’m not telling you to scrape his dick like a cheese grater! It’s just a little tease that’s necessary.”

  The three of us broke out in laughter when I caught a glimpse of a small congregation forming in the far corner of the building. Savannah and Jake noticed as well, and both turned in their seats to see what the commotion was about.

  “Is that Cade?” Savannah asked, motioning toward one guy who was standing in the center. He was wearing a long-sleeved, charcoal shirt and dark blue denim jeans, paired with a simple, black belt. The look on his face sent a shiver straight down my spine. It was cold and vacant, and I noticed it was directed towards another guy standing across from him. The other guy was shorter but bulkier than Cade, and I could tell just by looking at him that he was pure muscle. My heart leapt in my chest at the sight, and I found myself scrambling to stand up and make my way toward them. I needed to see what was happening between those two.

  “Wait, Em!” Savannah shouted as she quickly grabbed on to my hand and hurried to follow me into the crowd. The two of us pushed passed the other gathered bodies until we were finally in ear shot of Cade’s conversation.

  “I told you to shut the fuck up, Dan.” Cade’s voice was low, and it sounded like gravel was embedded deep in his throat. I hadn’t known Cade long, but I did know that he was absolutely pissed. I could feel the heat radiating off of his body in thick, tangible waves.

  Almost as if he could sense my presence, his eyes quickly fell to me as I stepped to the edge of the circle, meeting his gaze with my own. Something flickered across his face, but I couldn’t tell what it was. The emotion currently taking complete control over him was pure fury. That was obvious.

  “Ha, what’s the big deal bro? She’s already macked on you and him in the same night, there’s just a few others who want their shot next,” the other guy threatened. Dan didn’t look intimidated by Cade in the slightest; in fact, I thought he was truly enjoying turning Cade into molten lava.

  “What are they talking about?” Savannah asked behind me, but I couldn’t respond because I didn’t understand either.

  “Maybe another one of Cade’s bunnies? It sounds like they all want to hookup with her or something?” I wasn’t sure, but their bantering continue
d for a few moments longer.

  “Say that one more fucking time, and I’ll smash your goddamn head against the wall.”

  “Dude, is she your girlfriend or something? Why do you give a shit?”

  “Fuck no, and I don’t. But the way you’re talking about it is treading a really fucking thin line.” Cade glanced back toward me and it was almost as if he were pleading me with his eyes, guilt flickering behind those crystal blues. But I couldn’t understand why.

  Dan instantly noticed Cade’s glance in my direction and turned around to face me, a malicious grin spreading across his face. “Well, well, look who we have here. We were just talking about you, darlin’. Was hoping you’d come back to frat house after the game on Friday. What do you think?” He took a step toward me and I stumbled back into Savannah, who was equally as shocked as I was.

  What was he talking about?

  And then it hit me like a thousand bricks, sending my mind spiraling into a frenzy of humiliation. Right there in front of everyone in the café.

  They fucking knew.

  Dan mentioned someone hooking up with another guy and Cade in one night, that was me. Would definitely explain Cade’s look of guilt. How the hell did they find out? Everyone was asleep when I went downstairs. Unless ... unless Cade ran his mouth about another one of his conquests the next day. He disappeared right after I called an Uber, immediately going upstairs, and I had no idea who he talked to when I left.

  Fuck me, I couldn’t believe this was actually happening.

  What a monumental mistake.

  “Suck a fat dick, Dan,” I heard Savannah yell from behind me, but her words were muffled in my ears and my head was going fuzzy. The colors were shifting in and out of focus as I started to hear people around me murmuring and whispering amongst themselves.

  “Oh, come on, baby, you can bring your firecracker of a friend, too. We don’t mind a little sass,” he shouted back, bringing his hand to the front of his jeans and grabbing his crotch in a lewd gesture.