It still blew her mind. In a little over three months, she’d be the mother of twin boys. She looked down at her huge stomach, wondering as she did just how big her stomach would get. The movement of simply looking down caused her head to hurt even more. She closed her eyes yet again and felt her heart racing.
Five minutes before they got onstage plus five minutes to perform.
Ten minutes.
She could make it that long and then she could go and relax. Hell, maybe even leave the damn awards show. Right now, she didn’t care that they were nominated for anything.
“You look pale,” Marty noticed, standing by her side.
“Probably the lighting,” she replied, not wanting to worry him.
“You sure? Is everything all right?” he pushed.
“Yeah, just nerves,” she deflected, hoping that may truly be the case. “I haven’t played in front of an audience in months.”
She could tell Marty wasn’t buying it. Ever since she’d told the guys she was pregnant, they’d been very protective of her, especially Marty, and right now, she could tell that he wanted to push even more, but luckily Todd saved her.
“She’s nervous because she’s stuck in one spot and doesn’t know what to do.”
“Haha! For once this works to my advantage. That guitar will hide my enormous belly.”
“I still can’t believe that in a few short months one of us is going to have little ones running around,” Clark said, giving her shoulders a squeeze.
“Dude … they don’t come out running,” Todd shot back. “That happens a couple months later.”
Mia laughed at the absurdity of the conversation, feeling a little better, though it felt like a panic attack was still lurking in the background.
“Okay, guys. You’re up,” announced one of the stage crew.
Mia pushed off the wall and followed the stagehand. Before going on, she slipped on her guitar. Marty fixed the strap for her and they headed out to the dark stage. She found her spot and adjusted her microphone and took a deep breath as she placed her fingers on the keys of the keyboard to her right. She’d be playing both guitar and keyboard for this song.
The band waited quietly for the host to introduce them, and when the introduction was over, Mia started with the keyboard, followed eight notes later by Todd and his hypnotic drums. It was just her and Todd for the first minute of the song until the chorus when Marty and Clark added their guitar work.
About half-way through the song, she fought against the crippling anxiety. Her heart was pounding so hard and so fast, she thought it would fly out of her chest. Her stomach was extremely unsettled. And to top it off, the headache she had earlier felt a hundred times worse, like a vice was squeezing her head from all sides.
Fuck. This was not a panic attack. This was something more.
And that scared her.
Two more minutes.
Focus on the music. On the words.
The last three lines were here … she thought as a pain shot through her abdomen.
One final, long note.
The moment the note was finished, Mia doubled over, unable to catch her breath. She collapsed to her knees, trying to breathe, knowing something wasn’t right. She heard the murmurs from the audience, but she didn’t care.
“Mia?” Marty called as he ran to her. She heard Todd yelling Ethan’s name as he raced from his drum set. He knelt down beside her. “Mia, what’s wrong?”
“My heart,” she spoke unsteadily. The look in his eyes confirmed the feeling of déjà vu she felt. Mia was scared. The babies were quiet, which was so not like them. She groaned loudly as another sharp pain ran through her abdomen.
When she glanced up, Ethan was racing up the stage. He skidded to a halt and immediately dropped to his knees beside her. “Suga, what’s wrong?”
“Something’s not right. My head … my heart … can’t breathe …” she said in between ragged breaths. “Babies are not moving.”
A flicker of panic crossed his eyes before the strong man he was took over. “I’m going to help you stand and then I’m going to carry you offstage, okay?” he asked her. She nodded then he continued. “Hopefully, the paramedics have made their way inside by now.”
“I’ll check,” Clark volunteered and ran off.
Her husband stood up and situated himself beside her, wrapping his one arm around her back and the other around her front. “Ready, suga, on three. One … two … three,” Ethan spoke as he lifted her to a standing position. The sudden movement made her head swim and she gripped his forearm to steady herself, but the feeling didn’t go away.
“Ethan, I feel dizzy,” Mia said, her other hand going to her forehead. With ease, her husband had her in his arms and started carrying her off stage. She looked up at his handsome face, not looking anything like he was carrying a heavy pregnant woman in his arms. Her wonderfully strong man. “You’re so sexy,” she murmured against his cheek, causing him to laugh a little.
“Don’t make me laugh when you’re in my arms. I don’t want to drop you.”
“Sorry,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder and breathing in his scent, hoping it would calm her down.
She glanced ahead and saw the tall bodies of Marty and Todd, pushing everyone out of the way. Marty looked back and slightly nodded his head, she assumed that was to Ethan. He picked up his pace and then she felt Ethan lower her and her hold on him tightened.
“Mia, it’s okay. Let go. We’re with the paramedics right now.”
“Don’t leave me!” she said, the panic she’d been feeling reaching her voice.
“I won’t. I’ll stay right by your side.” Her gaze locked on the calm honey-colored eyes of her husband. “It’s okay,” he repeated yet again and slowly her grip on Ethan relaxed.
“How far along is she?” spoke an unfamiliar voice. Probably one of the paramedics, she thought.
“Twenty-six weeks with twins,” Ethan answered.
Her whole being was focused on her husband. How calm he was, not freaking out like she was. That helped her to not completely lose her shit. She looked at him and saw her home—the love of her life. She barely felt them examine her, but their words infiltrated her mind. “What’s going on, Mia?”
“My heart’s pounding. I feel very dizzy. My vision is blurred, and I can’t breathe very well,” she managed to tell them.
“One fifty-five over one ten,” one of the paramedics said to the other.
“Holy shit!” she exclaimed.
“That’s new to you?”
“Yes, usually it’s one ten over seventy.”
With that news, the paramedics wheeled her out of the building.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“To the hospital,” Ethan answered as he, Marty, Todd, and Clark, formed a barrier around her. “Marty and the guys will get your things and meet us there, okay?”
Mia closed her eyes and gave him a weak nod. Her men moved aside as the paramedics lifted the gurney into the back of the ambulance. She pushed herself up, waiting, watching for her husband to come in with her.
“Ethan!” she called, afraid that he wasn’t coming.
He hopped into the back and sat right by her side. “Relax, suga,” he said, gripping her hand as one of the medics pushed her back down. The sirens started and the ambulance took off.
“Ugh. I feel like I’m going to be thrown from the stretcher,” she said to her husband.
“You’re strapped in. Don’t worry. Okay?”
“Distract me. Please.”
“Our babies look good in leather,” he said, eyeing her leather-covered stomach.
“Leather maternity pants!” she exclaimed with a laugh. “Can you unzip them a little please?”
“Sure thing,” he said, pulling down the side zipper.
“Ahhh,” she said, scratching at her belly.
“Where are the boys?” he asked.
“Here,” she pointed and he placed his lips on her belly at t
hat spot. This was something they did nightly before they went to sleep. He’d ask her where they were and then he’d kiss those spots and tell them goodnight. The first time he did, she’d been reduced to a crying mess. “And here.” She smiled when he did it again.
“Be nice to your mama,” he said to them. That simple directive showed her exactly how worried he was.
“Ethan, I’m sorry.”
“Why?”
“This,” she said, her eyes showing him as they made their way around the ambulance.
“Oh, suga. This is out of your control. This isn’t your fault.”
“It isn’t?” she asked incredulously. She had wondered on more than one occasion how her past drug and alcohol use would come back to haunt her. Was this one of those times? “I don’t like making you worry.”
“Mia, I worry every day, about everything. Some things more than others. It’s who I am.”
“I know that. This is why I don’t like to add to it.”
He left her belly and caressed her lips with his so softly, so tenderly, she felt the heavy weight upon her chest shrink.
“This calms me down,” she said peacefully, wanting to lose herself in this moment with him.
“Until you get turned on.”
She laughed with him. How well her husband knew her body. “So true.”
He lifted his eyes from her, a look of concentration on his face and then the ambulance stopped. “Looks like we’re here.”
Mia felt the nerves come back now that his lips were no longer on her. Time to find out what was wrong. The paramedics opened the doors and pulled the stretcher out and they were met by a couple of doctors. They spoke quietly to the paramedics so Mia couldn’t hear what they said.
“Get them into Room Three,” the male doctor ordered and then addressed the doctor across from him. “Then find a private room for her out of the E.R.”
“No special treatment needed,” Mia spoke up.
The doctor’s face came into her view with his tanned face and bright, white smile. “The moment we bring you in, it will be chaos, especially with your husband all moody and stuff,” he added with a wink.
“I’m not moody,” Ethan piped up, sounding very agitated.
“It’s for the benefit of everyone in that E.R. that we get you to somewhere private, okay?”
She nodded at the doctor and then they burst through the doors. The noise level went through the roof and Mia felt herself tense up even more. They hurried her into a room and with ease transferred her to the bed. With all the activity around her, she couldn’t see Ethan. She needed her husband.
“Mia,” the doctor said, “I want to check on those babies, okay?”
Her clothes were adjusted and the warm gel was applied to her stomach, followed by the ultrasound wand. The grating squeak of shoes on the floor was all she heard. No whoosh of a beating baby heart. The sound of those shoes made her feel like she was surrounded by a wall of hi-def speakers blaring a basketball game from court level. It hurt her ears and she wanted it gone. She tried to cover her ears but her body was held down. Her eyes frantically scanned the room for Ethan. She needed to see him, but couldn’t, and that freaked her out even more. He grounded her and she so desperately needed that right now.
“Her blood pressure is rising. One seventy over ninety-five.”
“Where’s my husband?” she yelled through the panic.
“I’m right here, Mia,” came his beautiful voice.
“I can’t see you. I need to focus on you. Please!” she begged. He moved into her sight and she smiled. “Stay where I can see you.”
“Mia, are you prone to panic attacks?” the doctor asked.
“Yes,” she confirmed.
“Right now?” he asked, taking her wrist in his hand, like he was taking her pulse.
“Yes. Earlier, no, but definitely one right now.”
“Why?”
“All the activity. I’m scared. The goddamn screeching of the shoes.”
“Everyone leave the room except Dr. Moore,” the doctor ordered before directing his attention to her again. “I want you to breathe for me. Calming breaths, okay? You know what I want you to do.”
Of course she did, having done this more often than she cared for. “Okay,” she said, then took a couple long, deep breaths, feeling the air fill her lungs. “What’s your name?” she asked, after a few rounds of breathing.
“Sorry. I’m Dr. Garrabrant, but everyone calls me Dr. G.”
“Dr. G, how are my babies?”
Instead of answering, he stood above her and breathed with her, making sure she did that instead of talking. When she continued without him, he spoke. “They are doing fine. Heart rates are very good on both of them. As for you, Dr. Moore here will be drawing your blood and performing a urine test.”
“Do you know what’s wrong?” Ethan asked.
“I have an idea, but let’s wait on the lab results. Put a rush on those,” Dr. G directed. “I’m going to work on a new room for you. I already spy vultures.”
Mia looked up and saw a few people peering in the window. Having them watching her prone like this had her heartbeat spiking. Ethan quickly closed the blinds.
“Please stay calm. I want that BP to go down, not up.”
“I’ll try, Dr. G.”
The doctor smiled kindly and left the room. Dr. Moore quietly went about drawing her blood. “We’ll do the urine test in the new room,” he informed them.
After he’d finished, Mia let her head fall back and she concentrated on her breathing, breath by breath calming her down. Ethan stood by her side, smoothing her wild hair back, his fingertips caressing her skin in between strokes. He kept up a rhythm and she focused on that.
A few minutes later, Dr. G came back with a wheelchair. “Time to move, Mia.”
Before she could even raise herself up, Ethan lifted her out of the bed and placed her in the chair. “I could have done that myself,” she pouted.
“I know,” he said, smiling down at her.
Dr. Moore pushed her chair down a long hallway until they reached the elevator. Before she knew it, she was in a private room and Dr. Moore wheeled her to the bathroom.
“Please?” he asked, handing her a sterile cup. “Just leave it on the counter.”
She did as the doctor requested and a wall called Ethan greeted her when she returned to the room. “Back to bed for you.”
“Boo!” Mia said, standing still, feeling a tad better. Lighter. Calmer.
“Get in, suga, or I’ll put you there myself.”
She wrinkled her nose at him and stomped over to the bed where Dr. Moore hooked her up to all the machines again. “You’re on the obstetrics floor now. It should be a lot quieter. I’ll be back in a few minutes. I’m going to test this right now.”
While they waited for the doctors to return, Ethan sat by her side and just held her, making sure she stayed calm. They didn’t talk. She just absorbed the strength she got from just being in his presence. Not too long after Dr. Moore left, Dr. G returned and he took a seat at the end of the bed.
“So, Mia, I believe you have preeclampsia. It’s a condition that affects pregnant women, marked by high blood pressure and high levels of protein in the urine. We don’t know the exact causes of preeclampsia, and there is no cure for it either except delivery, but we are not there yet. We need to manage it so it doesn’t get worse.”
“Worse?” Ethan asked.
“It can lead to eclampsia, where you might develop seizures. And now for the fun part—drugs. We’re going to give you some meds to prevent seizures and manage your blood pressure. We’ll assess how you do with these and then we’ll re-evaluate.”
“Okay,” Mia spoke the only word she could. She was scared, rightfully so. What did this mean for her babies? She had three more months to carry them. They weren’t ready.
“Your BP is lower,” the doctor continued, not privy to the thoughts in her head, “but not as low as I would like.”
“One forty over ninety is the goal. You’re getting there. You’re lower than when you first arrived.”
“What is it now?” Ethan prodded.
“One fifty over ninety.”
“Yay me!” Mia exclaimed with false cheer.
“So, Dr. G, what’s next for her?” her husband asked what she wanted to know.
“We hope the magnesium sulfate lowers her BP and we continue to monitor her,” the doctor said, turning towards her. “You’re definitely spending the night here.”
She figured. “And afterwards?”
“Bed rest for at least a week.”
A week?
“But I have to get home!” Ethan had his game this weekend plus a Thursday night game the following week. She couldn’t be without him.
“If your BP goes down and you keep it down, I’ll consider letting you fly out. Mia, this is a very serious condition. Our goal is to keep your babies inside of you for as long as possible without causing harm to you.”
She nodded. “I’m still going to complain,” she quipped.
“Ahh, you like to make jokes.”
“Yes, especially when under pressure.” Or I’d be crying.
Mia looked up when the door opened and a male nurse walked in. She eyed him warily as he walked to her IV stand. “I’m going to administer the drugs now, okay?”
With a nod, she looked away as the nurse messed with the IV.
“Now, rest. I’ll be back later to check up on you.”
Dr. G and the nurse left her alone with Ethan who pulled her to his chest. She knew he was thinking about all that the doctor had told them, worrying about it all. She hated causing him this worry and had no idea how to take it away. A few minutes of silence later, Ethan spoke. “Mia, I’m going to call my coach. I need to figure some things out.”
“What’s there to figure out?” she asked, toying with a button on his shirt.
“You’re stuck here for at least a week.”
Never Over You Page 5
