alices_nightmare

by Jonathan Green

  Suddenly a shadow falls across the garden as a cloud passes in front of the face of the sun, and the rain starts to fall. The shower does not last long but leaves Alice’s clothes and hair soaking wet. The Snap-dragon-flies do not get off so lightly, however. The sudden downpour has doused their flames and now they lie on the gravel path struggling to take to the air again as their plum pudding bodies dissolve around them.

  Wringing the worst of the wet from her hair and shaking out her dress, so that it might dry more quickly in the sun, Alice is able to continue on her way at last, no longer troubled by the troublesome insects.

  Turn to 146.

  394

  Suddenly the Walrus gives a gruff bark and falls flat on its face in the sand. Alice watches for any sign of movement but there is nothing, not even a twitch of the big brute’s moustache.

  Alice decides to try calling out to the Walrus to see if that garners any response. “But what to say?” she muses. And then it comes to her.

  “The time has come,” the damsel says,

  “To talk of many things:

  Of shoes – and ships – and sealing-wax –

  Of cabbages – and kings –

  And why the sea is boiling hot –

  And whether pigs have wings.”

  After several moments Alice dares to take a step towards the Walrus and prods it with her foot, but there is no sign of a response.

  “I suppose the greedy creature must have eaten something that didn’t agree with him,” she remarks, taking in the numerous oyster shells strewn about the beach.

  Turn to 414.

  395

  Alice covers up any sign of her latest struggle by making sure that all the incriminating evidence ends up in the pond.

  Not wanting to linger here a moment longer, she hurries on her way, but does she go east (turn to 210) or west (turn to 510)?

  396

  Her heart pounding with the rush of adrenaline, Alice puts the key in the lock of the cell door and turns it. There is a click and the door swings open. Having checked that the way is clear, Alice heads off into the Palace.

  Turn to 342.

  397

  As Alice enters the forest she passes from daylight into a sinister, twilit gloom. As she moves deeper into the preternatural darkness, she realises that the trees are giving way to towering fungal forms that appear to be taller than the trees themselves. Alice starts to wonder if she has changed size as she has followed the path through the forest.

  Finally, the path she is following between the looming fungi forks. If you want Alice to follow the path the left-hand branch, turn to 407. If you want her to follow the right-hand path, as it disappears into the mist, turn to 285.

  398

  The Red Queen lies dead on the floor of the throne room. Perhaps now Alice’s nightmare will come to an end.

  But as she stands over the vampire’s body – her hands on her knees, gasping for breath – the Red Queen rises once more, apparently able to shrug off injuries that would have proved fatal to any mere mortal, her brutalised flesh knitting back together.

  “And now, Alice dear, it’s my turn,” says the vampire, offering her a cruel smile.

  If Alice hadn’t already seen what horrors the harridan was capable of, witnessing the life-leech’s resurrection might just have sent her mind plummeting over the edge into the abyss of insanity. As it is, all she knows for certain is that she doesn’t have the means of defeating the Red Queen and must simply try to escape. But how can she outrun an opponent who is faster and stronger than she is, not to mention capable of healing from what should have been lethal wounds?

  How should Alice try to escape the Red Queen?

  Run away, as fast as she can? Turn to 388.

  Use a Gryphon’s Feather (if she has one)? Turn to 356.

  Alternatively, if the word ‘Phantasm’ is recorded on Alice’s Adventure Sheet, you will also have a number associated with the word; turn to the paragraph with the same number now.

  399

  Alice remains exactly where she is as something huge and hideous emerges from the cave. It is vaguely humanoid in form but is clad only in animal skins. One strong arm is dragging a massive club, made from a whole tree branch, and its muscular, malformed body is covered with a host of healed scars.

  But what has attracted Alice’s attention, and has her shaking in an apoplexy of fear, is the fact that the lumbering brute has not one, but two heads, growing from lumpen necks upon its shoulders. Four eyes fix on Alice and a pair of malevolent smiles spread across the Ogre’s two faces.

  “Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum, I smell the blood of human scum,” growls the head on the left.

  “Tweedle-dum and Tweedle-dee, what d’you want with him and me?” rumbles the head on the right.

  Thinking fast on her feet Alice suddenly says, “I have come to challenge you!”

  “What sort of a challenge?” asks the second head, suspicion creasing its ugly brow.

  How should Alice respond?

  “A test of wits!”Turn to 511.

  “A test of strength!” Turn to 30.

  400

  At yet another turn in the path, Alice comes upon the statue of a duck of all things! Which way now?

  North? Turn to 360.

  West? Turn to 390.

  401

  On a shelf in a larder Alice finds a jar labelled ‘Treacle Mine Treacle’, another labelled ‘Yesterday’s Jam’, and next to that ‘Tomorrow’s Jam’. However on the shelf below she also finds bread and cheese and a large walnut cake.

  Finding a clean muslin cloth, she helps herself to enough food to make four meals. Every time she eats a meal she can add 4 Endurance points. (Add the Bread, Cheese and Cake to Alice’s Adventure Sheet.)

  Her combing of the house doesn’t furnish her with any further clues as to the whereabouts of the missing inhabitants, and so she decides it is best she went on her way again.

  Turn to 194.

  402

  The Hatter-Hare-Dormouse-Automaton destroyed, Alice continues on her way deeper into the depths of the Palace.

  It is as she is passing a sturdy iron-bound oak door that she hears a plaintive sobbing. Being a caring child, she calls out, “Who’s there? Are you alright?” and “What’s the matter?”

  But whoever is on the other side of the door appears too distressed to answer. Alice cautiously tries the door but it is locked. However, hanging from a hook nearby is a large iron key.

  If you want Alice to use the key to unlock the door, turn to 421. If you think it best that she not tarry for any reason and hurry on her way, turn to 431.

  403

  Boldly, Alice steps into the pool, but rather than feeling wet she feels as if she is entering a silvery cloud. Then her head goes into a dizzying spin as the world whirls about her.

  Roll two dice, or pick a card from the deck. If you roll 2-4, or the card is a Spade, turn to 454. If you roll 5-7, or the card is a Diamond, turn to 6. If you roll 8-10, or the card is a Club, turn to 427. If you roll 11-12, or the card is a Heart, turn to 446.

  404

  Alice must fight the fire-sparking insects at the same time. However, every time one of them successfully injures her it will cause 3 points of damage rather than the usual 2, due to the increased strength of the insects’ flames.

  COMBAT ENDURANCE

  First SNAP-DRAGON-FLY 7 6

  Second SNAP-DRAGON-FLY 7 6

  If Alice defeats the Snap-dragon-flies, she can continue on her way at last, no longer troubled by the bothersome insects – turn to 146.

  405

  The path ends before an ornate gate, decorated with wrought iron flowers and ivy leaves. The gate is locked, by not one but six separate locks. However, as Alice looks closer she sees that each lock actually has the appearance of a clock.


  There is one on the top left, one on the top right, one on each side, and one at the bottom right of the gate, and another at the bottom left. Each clock has two hands, but the minute hands are locked in place as follows:

  Top Left – half past the hour

  Top Right – quarter to the hour

  Middle Right – on the hour

  Bottom Right – on the hour

  Bottom Left – quarter past the hour

  Middle Left – half past the hour

  Alice soon discovers that the hour hands of the clocks are able to move, apart from the one on the top left which is stuck on 3.

  “I suppose I shall have to set the clocks to the right times in order to open the gate,” Alice says, her brow knitting as she concentrates on the puzzle.

  Take a Logic test. If Alice passes, turn to 415. If not, turn to 435.

  406

  The trouble is Alice is far too short to reach any of the door handles, let alone able to try and turn them to find out if any of the doors are actually unlocked.

  However, it is then that she spots a low curtain that she hasn’t noticed before. The curtain is still taller than she is but pulling it back reveals another door, only fifteen inches high, with a golden lock.

  The tiny door is locked, but if Alice has a Golden Key, she could try it in the golden lock (turn to 425). If not, she will have to try something else (turn to 445).

  407

  The path is almost like a tunnel through the fungal forest, so far do the caps of the gigantic mushrooms spread over the path, their spore-filled gills creating a vaulted roof above Alice’s head. And then the proliferation of fungi parts and the child enters a clearing.

  Four different paths lead off from the clearing. The first is lined by puffballs, the second passes beside a mass of over-sized yellow-orange fungi, the entrance to the third is marked by a tree-sized toadstool, and the fourth vanishes into mist among the mushrooms.

  Which path should Alice follow now?

  The puffball pathway? Turn to 427.

  The fungal footpath? Turn to 478.

  The toadstool trail? Turn to 81.

  The route leading into the mist? Turn to 285.

  408

  Alice is just about to leave the Jubjub Bird’s crag-top eyrie, when she spots something lying in the bottom of the nest. Moving aside some of the moss and feathers, whilst being careful not to touch any of the manky bones, Alice finds a rucksack. Inside are some dry biscuits and a wedge of strong-smelling hard cheese. (There is enough food for two snacks, each of which will add 4 Endurance points.)

  Deciding that she has risked spending enough time here already, Alice begins her descent of the cliff-face. Reaching the bottom without further mishap, the child begins to make her way back down through the crags, towards the treeline, watching out for any loose stones that might send her tumbling down the side of the peak, or uneven rocks that might have her going over on her ankle.

  Eventually, her descent is done and Alice finds herself re-entering the tulgey wood, although now she can see the battlements of the ruined fortress over the tops of the unhealthy-looking trees.

  Turn to 512.

  409

  “How many different ways of measuring the time are there?” Alice wonders. “The Egyptians had their water clocks, for many years people had nothing more than the humble hourglass, and now there are great Grandfather clocks, with their swinging pendulum weights, and pocket watches with the most intricate escapements.”

  She looks at the sundial again. “I suppose if I could work out the answer to the riddle I should spell it out by turning the gnomon to line up with each letter in turn, until I have spelt out the whole word.”

  Can you help Alice solve the riddle of the sundial? If so, turn each of the letters in the answer into a number using the code A=1, B=2… Z=26, add the numbers together and then turn to the paragraph with the same number. (If the paragraph makes no sense, you have failed to answer the riddle correctly and will have to return here.)

  If you are unable to answer the riddle, Alice has no choice but to continue on her way (turn to 31).

  410

  The path Alice is following turns sharply by ninety degrees once again. Should she head north (turn to 390) or go east (turn to 127).

  411

  Alice considers that she might have something that she could use to defend herself against the strange creatures in the pocket of her dress, but what exactly?

  Some Slug Pellets? Turn to 438.

  Mr Bloom’s Patent Plant Provender? Turn to 449.

  If Alice possesses neither of these items, she will have to try a different approach (turn to 275).

  412

  “You are old, Father William,” Alice begins,

  “And your hair has become very white;

  And yet you incessantly stand on your head –

  Do you think, at your age, it is right?”

  “In my youth,” Father William replies to the child,

  “I feared it might injure the brain;

  But, now that I’m perfectly sure I have none,

  Why, I do it again and again.”

  Alice considers the old man’s words of wisdom but cannot fault such logic. (Add 1 to Alice’s Logic score.)

  And now the curious old man is standing there balancing a writhing eel on the end of his nose.

  “You are old,” says the child, “one would hardly suppose

  That your eye was as steady as ever;

  Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose —

  What made you so awfully clever?”

  “I have answered your question, and that is enough,”

  Says the old man; “don’t give yourself airs!

  Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?

  Be off, or I’ll kick you down stairs!”

  With that, the mists return until Alice can barely see her hand in front of her face. And then she opens her eyes…

  Turn to 357.

  413

  The path Alice is following gives way to lush grass and she enters a Rose Garden, within the confines of the maze. If Alice has been here before, turn to 423; if not, turn to 252.

  414

  Looking at the Walrus, lying there dead upon the beach, nothing more than food for the crabs now, Alice considers that one of the animal’s tusks would make a handy weapon indeed.

  If you want Alice to arm herself in this way, record the Walrus Tusk on Alice’s Adventure Sheet, and whenever she is involved in combat any hit she delivers using the elongated ivory tooth will cause 3 Endurance points of damage, rather than 2.

  Leaving the sandy bay, Alice considers which way to go now.

  If she hasn’t already done so could make her way across the beach to explore the rocky cove (turn to 138), otherwise it’s time for her to head inland (turn to 312).

  415

  “I’m going to have to be clock-wise about this,” Alice says.

  If you can solve the puzzle, turn to the number that is the same as the total you reach when you add up all of the numbers that the hour hands should be pointing to. If not (or if the paragraph you turn to doesn’t make any sense, meaning you have got the answer wrong), turn to 455.

  416

  There are always a couple of hairpins and a nail file lying forgotten in the pocket of Alice’s dress and she puts these to good use now, unfolding the pins to create a useable set of lock-picks.

  Poking them into the lock, Alice starts to manipulate her improvised tools in an attempt to manoeuvre the moving parts of the lock to let herself out.

  Take a Logic test and an Agility test. If Alice passes both these tests, turn to 436, but if she fails either of them, turn to 426.

  417

  “My, how realistic you are,” says Alice, addressing the Wyvern. “I
’m only glad you can’t actually breathe fire, considering you’re really nothing more than a trimmed tree.”

  Barely are the words out of her mouth than the Wyvern opens its gaping jaws and a torrent of flame issues forth. Throwing up her hands to protect her face, the startled child dives for the relative safety of the ground, although she does suffer some burns to her arms. (Lose 4 Endurance points.)

  However, the Lion and the Unicorn do not get off so lightly. Their foliage and wooden stems catch light and the flames quickly consume them. The Wyvern shares their fate, as it manages to set itself ablaze with its fiery breath.

  The topiary now nothing more than burnt sticks of charcoal lying on the ground, if she is able to, Alice picks herself up and continues on her way.

  Turn to 146.

  418

  “Beware the Jabberwock, my girl! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!” the Alice-Jabberwock laughs. “Tea time!”

  The monster’s child-like voice becomes a rumbling, deep-throated roar. Raising the Vorpal Sword one last time, Alice readies herself for her ultimate battle. (The Jabberwock has the initiative. Also, the Vorpal Sword will only cause 3 Endurance points of damage to the monster’s iron-hard scales, rather than the usual 4.)