39 Weeks

by Terri Douglas

  ‘They’ll keep you here until a doctor has given you and Ella your final check, but everything seems fine so you’ll probably be able to leave soon, in an hour or so I’d say.’

  ‘In an hour or so! I had to stay for five days when I had you.’ Mum said shocked.

  ‘They kick you out pretty quick nowadays Mum.’

  ‘So I see.’

  Kate said ‘well we found that unless there’s a problem, the mothers recover quicker in their own home, and a midwife will come and see your daughter and grand-daughter to make sure they’re coping alright’.

  Mum sat down in the visitors chair thoroughly disgruntled. I could tell she thought it was outrageous that I was going home only hours after giving birth.

  ‘It’s alright Mum. I’d like to go home.’

  ‘She won’t be on her own.’ Rob said.

  ‘Oh you going to stick around this time?’ James said.

  Rob looked at me, and I looked back begging him with my eyes not to retaliate, and thankfully he didn’t.

  Dad came back very pleased with himself after going through my phone. He’d phoned everyone. Marsha and Mac had said they’d see me when I got back to the flat. Doreen had sent congratulations and said that she’d spread the word at work and would come and see me later tonight. Tricia had stayed over at Shelley’s when they’d left the hospital earlier and they were both on their way back to the hospital now. Short Fran evidently hadn’t been able to stand the pace so had gone back to hers to catch up on her zz’s, and everyone else Dad had phoned had all sent their best wishes and said that they’d come and see me over the next few days.

  I was delighted of course to have everyone’s best wishes and pleased that they were all so keen to come and see me and Ella, but oh my God, all those visitors, and all in the space of a few days? I mean much as I wanted to see everyone and show Ella off I really could have done with a bit of time, a few days at least to get used to the idea of being a mum.

  Dad took over holding Ella and everyone started talking at once about how cute she was and how tiny, seven pounds two ounces which apparently was a good weight, and didn’t she look like me, and how perfect her little hands were, and how she had a lot of hair for a newborn, and on and on it went.

  Shelley and Tricia turned up just as the doctor came back to give me and Ella the once over, so everyone had to leave again, but only to the waiting room. Evidently Ella was fine, all normal, all perfect. And I was alright, lucky to have had no stitches Kate said, so we could both leave as soon as we were ready.

  The doctor left still all smiles and jollity, must drive his wife absolutely mad I thought, it’d drive me mad anyway. Then Kate said she’d finished her shift and was going. I thanked her and told her how great she was and how glad I was that she’d been my midwife, but she shrugged it off as if it was nothing.

  Mum came back and helped me dress Ella in one of the new pink babygrows I’d bought with me, the spotty one. It fitted her as if I’d bought it two sizes too big and the feet dangled limply over the end of Ella’s actual feet. The arms weren’t too bad as at least you could turn those back to fit, but the overall effect was a small baby swamped in borrowed clothes. Even the little baby hat was a bit on the large side and engulfed Ella’s tiny head. But she did look cute and more mine somehow now she was in her own clothes that I’d chosen.

  I started getting changed myself while Mum held Ella. ‘So what’s happening with you and Rob?’ she said.

  I stopped getting dressed. ‘I don’t know Mum. We’ve sort of made it up and I’ve forgiven him for going away like that, but as to what’s going to happen now . . I just don’t know.’

  ‘He loves you, you know.’

  ‘Does he?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘How do you know?’

  ‘I just know. Earlier when we were all waiting, he was so worried.’

  ‘But after everything . .’

  ‘It’ll be fine, you’ll see.’

  ‘So did you like him, I mean you never got a chance to meet him before not really, and this probably wasn’t the best time for a first meeting was it?’

  ‘I did like him, I liked that he was so worried about you, means he cares. Maybe this was a good time, I got to see the real him and not how he’d be on his best behaviour if you see what I mean.’

  ‘I guess, but you liked him?’

  ‘Yes. What are you going to do about James because he seems to care about you an awful lot too?’

  ‘James, yes I’ve created a bit of a monster there haven’t I?’

  ‘If it’s Rob you love you’ll have to tell James.’

  ‘I have and he keeps saying he understands, but . .’

  ‘Well you’ll have to tell him again.’

  But the way things turned out I didn’t need to tell him again.

  As soon as I was decent everyone crowded back into the delivery room, including a couple of nurses who were cleaning up and setting everything to rights, ready for the next patient presumably, and were giving us all the evil eye so we’d vacate a bit quicker.

  Mum hastily repacked my hospital bag with everything and that as it turned out I hadn’t really needed as half the stuff I’d bought with me was unused, but I suppose no-one could predict what could have happened or how it might have turned out, and I might have needed to stay over. Shelley made a bee-line for Ella and was making the most of her chance of a cuddle while trying to keep out of the nurses way, and everyone else stood around waiting for me and looking superfluous.

  I was finally ready and we all left together trying not to make too much of a production out of it, or too much noise. I carried Ella, and Dad carried my bag, closely followed by Mum. Then Rob and Shelley who was explaining to him that she’d left Nick at home in bed, which left James and Tricia to bring up the rear of our impromptu procession.

  Once outside in the car park the sun was just beginning to come up and I showed Ella what daylight looked like to which she squinted and blinked a lot. Of course Dads car was still parked over the other side of the hospital so he said he’d run over and get it while I waited. Rob said he’d take me so I wouldn’t have to wait, and James said he should be the one to drive me, and before we all knew it the truce was over.

  ‘Look Chippy when will you get it, she doesn’t want you. You gave it your best shot and it was nice of you to help her out, although that was probably more for your benefit than Judy’s, but it’s time to back off now.’ Rob said patronisingly.

  ‘Back off? What like you did when you pulled your disappearing act?’ James scoffed.

  Rob froze, I could see his fist was clenched but he was fighting the urge to use it. He looked at me and calmly asked me was I alright. To which I bewilderedly answered ‘yes’, not quite sure why he would ask me at that particular moment.

  ‘And Ella’s alright?’ Rob continued.

  ‘Yes.’ I said again still slightly bewildered.

  ‘And it’s now officially after the birth?’ Rob said emphasising the word after.

  ‘Yes.’ I said beginning to realise where this was headed. ‘But please don’t . . .’

  But it was too late. Rob gave in to the urge to use his fist and punched James so hard he knocked him over.

  Then everything happened at once. James lay on the tarmac his nose pouring with blood, while Mum took a sideways step to stand in front of me and Ella instinctively trying to protect us both. Shelley stepped in front of Rob to stop him doing anything else, and Tricia produced a wad of tissues from her bag and was bending down trying to help James. While Dad back from retrieving the car, just stood and laughed.

  Rob held Shelley to one side and looking down on James said ‘you’ve been asking for that for months, but because of Judy I’ve resisted the urge until now and let it go. But just get it into your thick head that Judy is with me, and if you ever show your face or try to muscle your way in again you’ll get more of the same, only next time you won’t be able to get up afterwards. Understood?’

&nb
sp; James didn’t answer, didn’t even look at anyone, while Tricia continued ministering to him and tried to mop up his bloody nose.

  Shelley held on to Robs arm but he shrugged it off and turned his back on James. Dad still grinning said to me ‘guess Rob’s driving you home then?’

  ‘Guess so.’ I said.

  And that’s exactly what happened. Rob took me home and Mum, Dad and Shelley followed. Tricia stayed with James and as we walked away I saw her helping him up.

  47

  28th February – Week 39 + 1 Year

  It’s been a year since Ella was born. Today was her first birthday and we were having a bit of a party get-together to celebrate. Everyone was there who’d been there at the birth, including James. I know impossible to believe but he was.

  He was with Tricia and she was six months pregnant with James’s baby. And unbelievably Rob was okay about it. As soon as he began to accept the fact that I wasn’t in love with James, had never in fact been even a little bit in love with James, and it became obvious that after Rob’s caveman outburst James and Tricia had commiserated with each other over how rubbish love is, well when you’re with the wrong one it is anyway, and James had switched his affections to a much more eager recipient, namely Tricia who was only too pleased to be the recipient, Rob was fine. We didn’t see them often of course, well I met Tricia quite often as always but as a couple we didn’t see them often, but when we did Rob and James were extremely civil to each other and didn’t mention the past at all, as if it had never happened.

  Marsha and Mac were there, and Harry and Flora were being unusually well behaved. Marsha doted on Ella, and had been such a help to me over the past year that I’d come to think of her as my adopted big sister.

  Mum was there, and Dad was there. They weren’t together exactly but they weren’t exactly separate either. Dad had broken up with Stella last Easter, and Mum had only seen Colin a couple more times after their trip to York, and since then Dad had taken Mum out to dinner a few times, and they’d even been away for a weekend together in Paris just before Christmas, so maybe they were finally getting over their second go at puberty, or maybe not, judging by the way Mum was flirting with him today.

  Shelley and Nick were boring everyone to death with their wedding plans, due to take place in July, and an expensive sumptuous affair it all sounded as if it was going to be as well. I was to be the maid of honour, and I was, honoured I mean, and the rest of our ‘gang’ were going to be bridesmaids. Nick’s brother would be the best man and Rob was going to be chief usher. She’d landed her job at Schuster’s and the increased salary she was now earning was helping to pay for the whole wedding extravaganza they’d planned.

  Doreen and Jack had come, and Shirley. I was still looking after all the accounts for Shirley and she and her daughters had branched out a bit and were cleaning the building opposite Fishers now as well. But I hadn’t gone back to work, well not at Fishers anyway. When the time came for me to return to work I just couldn’t do it, I couldn’t bring myself to leave Ella with someone else or at a nursery. Jack had done a good job while I was away, and he’d passed another exam so now it was his job, permanently, and I’d taken on some more accounts that I could do at home, Norman Steadman had asked me to do his sons tax return and that had led to a couple of his friends asking me if I’d do theirs, and well it all sort of snowballed from there.

  Rob and I had picked up where we left off before his excursion to the Orkneys and had moved his stuff upstairs to mine. It wasn’t an official moving in or anything like that, but over the following few weeks after Ella was born more and more of his things ended up at my place until he was just living there instead of downstairs. Of course things weren’t exactly the same, I mean we had Ella now, but Rob was brilliant and more often than not was the one who got up in the middle of the night to see to her in those first few weeks. He’d landed a job on the local paper, it wasn’t his dream job or anything but it was a regular salary, and it did mean he didn’t have to go away, although he still did the odd bit of freelance when he got the chance.

  Ella was growing all the time, she’d taken her first steps all by herself a couple of weeks after Christmas and was now toddling around on her own, which was good and bad. Good because it was great she was walking albeit clumsily and falling over a lot, and bad because it meant she could now reach everything you didn’t want her to touch and was trying ever more adventurous things. She’d learnt a few words but hadn’t quite got to making a sentence yet, but she was so cute and doted on by so many people that to tell the truth she barely needed to be able to talk much anyway.

  And me? I was as happy as could be. I couldn’t imagine how I’d ever got along without Ella, she was everything to me and the best thing that had ever happened, very closely followed by Rob. I was so lucky, I had the man I loved and my beautiful daughter, what more could a girl ask for or want.

  There was one blip on the radar, if you could call it a blip, my period was a week late.

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