Live In Position

by Sadie Grubor

  For the most part, the drive was quiet. During the ride I tried to wrap my head around Dr. Bishop's behavior. His playful, cocksure attitude was in effect now, but would he return back to his typical behavior when we got to the house? And why is he playing this game?

  "I'm hungry." Victoria announced from the backseat.

  I twisted in my seat and looked back at her.

  "What for?"

  "Grilled cheese," She smiled brightly, "With tomatoes. Yum."

  I grinned at her. "We can get started on those as soon as we get home, okay?"

  She nodded and licked her lips. I giggled at her and shook my head, turning back toward the front. It was quiet again, until we pulled into the driveway.

  "What the hell?" Dr. Bishop exclaimed.

  I glanced at him quickly. Following where he was staring, my eyes landed on Connor standing on the front porch in a screaming match with Ilene. Dr. Bishop parked the car and I groaned as we climbed out.

  "Damn it Ilene! Don't come here and create more problems." Connor begged.

  "Me create more problems? I create the problems? Who had the affair Connor and who has brought their whore to my child's home? Not me, that's for sure!" Ilene's face was flushed and wild looking.

  "Mother, Father, please refrain from creating a scene." Dr. Bishop tried to defuse the situation. "We can talk rationally inside."

  I grabbed Victoria's hand and walked with her slowly toward the house.

  "No." Connor insisted.

  Dr. Bishop looked at his father in surprise.

  "She already tried to attack Juliet when she arrived." Connor explained.

  I watched Dr. Bishop pinch the bridge of his nose and his shoulders fall in defeat.

  "Speaking of the whore," Ilene spat in Connor's direction. "Collin, how could you allow that piece of trash into your home? After everything she has caused, you agree to let her stay here." Ilene turned on the waterworks now.

  Connor pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head at her reaction. It was the first time I saw a similarity in Dr. Bishop and hid father.

  "Mother, if I recall correctly, you didn't help this matter one bit, so do not pass judgment on me." He growled at her.

  "I can't believe my baby boy would do this to me." She sobbed louder.

  "What about Allison?" Dr. Bishop asked in a tense tone.

  Ilene looked at him with fury in her eyes.

  "She is who I came to see, but he," she pointed at Connor, "won't allow me inside."

  "I told you she doesn't want or need to see you. You have caused enough damage Leenie."

  "Don't you dare call me that! You no longer get to use that 'pet name' with me." She snapped and turned back to Collin. "Please, I just want to make sure she is okay. I heard what happened and –"

  Larissa appeared in the door and cut Ilene off.

  "She does not wish to see you Ilene." Larissa's anger was evident in her fiery eyes and flushed cheeks.

  "W-what?" Ilene choked out.

  "You heard me. I went to talk to her, in hopes of resolving this," she motioned between Connor and Ilene, "scene you are creating. She does not want to see you." Larissa's arms crossed over her chest, almost as if she were inviting Ilene to challenge her.

  "I see," she sniffled, "So, everyone is against me? Your father has an affair and another child, but you're all against me?"

  "No one is against you mother." Dr. Bishop tried to soothe her.

  "Speak for yourself." Larissa spat before turning and walking back into the house.

  "I'm sure Allison will speak with you when she is ready to." Connor said calmly before following Larissa.

  Victoria and I were only a few feet away from where Dr. Bishop and Ilene stood. She finally noticed us.

  "Victoria, dear," she smiled warmly at her.

  Victoria hesitated.

  "Hi grandma."

  "Come give your grandmother a hug." She held her arms out to her.

  I nudged Victoria toward her. Victoria stepped into Ilene's arms and squeezed her tightly.

  "I love you grandma."

  "Thank you, dear." She responded.

  I wanted to hit her in the head. How about telling her you love her back you selfish witch.

  She set Victoria back on her feet and I took her hand in mine before walking into the house. Dr. Bishop did not follow. I assumed he was going to talk with his mother.

  "How about those grilled cheese sandwiches, huh?" I tugged on Victoria's arm. She grinned brightly and ran toward the kitchen.

  We made the sandwiches together and then sat and ate in silence. Once we were finished, we cleaned up everything and went upstairs.

  Victoria went into her room to play for a bit and I sat down to my laptop and worked on my book. It was about two hours later Victoria came running into my room.

  "Sophia, look!" She held up a large piece of white paper that had drawings of mermaids on it.

  "That's pretty awesome." I closed my laptop and took the picture into my hands. "Who is this?" I asked, knowing the red hair meant that it was her.

  "That's me, of course." She giggled. "And that is you." She pointed to the mermaid with brown hair.

  "Who is this?" I pointed to a small baby looking mermaid. "Is that M.J?" I started to smile.

  Victoria sighed.

  "That's my pretend baby sister." She looked longingly at the picture.

  "Oh." That was all the response I could muster up.

  She wanted a sibling, a baby sister?

  I changed the subject by asking about different things in her picture. The coral, the shells, and the jewels on the ocean floor, we discussed the picture thoroughly. Then I found some tape and posted it on my wall.

  "Do I have to live with Grace?" Victoria asked me quietly.

  I knelt down to her.

  "No. You get to stay with your daddy."

  "And you, right?"

  I nodded.

  "Yes, but you will be going to visit with your mother, er Grace."

  "Visit her where?" She asked.

  I shrugged.

  "I'm not sure, but it will most likely be where she lives and she will have a room all set up special for you. I just know it." Victoria didn't look happy about it. "It's kind of cool, you will get two rooms." I nudged her arm, trying to cheer her up.

  She smiled a little. "Yeah, maybe."

  "Well, give it a try and then we will see what you think, okay?" She nodded.

  The remainder of the evening was quiet; however, the night brought on more dramatics.

  It was about ten at night when the pounding started. I woke up next to Victoria, in her bed, the DVD menu playing over and over.

  Sitting up, I reached for the remote and turned it off. The pounding got louder, so I climbed out of bed and left Victoria's room. Halfway down the stairs was when the voices began.

  "Collin, you are my favorite!" Ilene slurred. "How can you choose that whore over me?"

  I continued down the stairs and as my toe touched the cold marble of the first floor I caught sight of Ilene hanging onto Dr. Bishop. I stopped walking and waited for a moment, just watching.

  "No one has chosen anyone over you." He tried to pull her up straight and walk with her. He was having a difficult time, so I walked quickly toward them and put my head under her left arm. Dr. Bishop looked at me with surprise and slight nervousness.

  "Who are…oh you're the 'nanny'!" She drawled out the last word. Mentally I cringed, knowing she wasn't going to stop there. "Another live in whore," Ilene slurred. "Collin, really, you don't need this trash working for you."

  "That's enough, mother. You're drunk and need to sleep this off." He spoke through clenched teeth.

  "Nonsense," she exclaimed.

  "Oh dear God," Allison's voice exclaimed from the top of the staircase. "Throw her out Collin! I don't want her here." Allison started to sob.

  Juliet appeared at Allison's side and wrapped her arms around her.

  "Don't touch me!" Allison turned o
n Juliet.

  Juliet's face was shocked and hurt.

  "Just because you spread your legs for my father doesn't mean it changes the fact you handed me off to that woman as if I were a bag of groceries!" Allison shouted at Juliet, who was slowly retreating from the assault.

  Next was Connor who appeared and put an arm around Allison. "Calm down, she was only trying to help."

  "You can defend your mistress to everyone else, but do not defend her to me!"

  "That's my girl," Ilene shouted with pride toward Allison.

  "Fuck you Ilene! I'm not your girl! I don't belong to anyone." Allison sobbed hard and then disappeared. I assumed back to her room.

  "I think I should go." Juliet spoke quietly.

  "Hell yes you should," Ilene shouted out.

  "No, it's fine. Let's go back to bed." Connor wrapped an arm around her and pulled her along with him.

  I shook my head and tried not to laugh, but a snort slipped out. I could feel Dr. Bishop snap his gaze onto me, but I refused to look at him.

  We finally got Ilene up the stairs and into a guest room that was currently unoccupied. She collapsed onto the bed and started snoring loudly. That was the last straw for me. I covered my mouth as another snort slipped out and hurried out of the room.

  I got to the hallway and bent at my waist, leaning against the wall. I kept my mouth covered, but my body was convulsing in silent laughter. At the sound of Dr. Bishop's footsteps, I pushed from the wall and started walking quickly to my room.

  Still trying to fight the laughter, I reached for the handle of my bedroom door. I fully intended to unleash the hysterics as soon as I closed it behind me, but the feeling of his hand on my shoulder made me jump.

  I knew it was him. I could feel it and given the fact everyone else was locked away in a room it had to be him. I turned and immediately met his eyes.

  "I apologize for what my mother said." His tone was cool and calm, as collected as always.

  I simply nodded and bit the side of my mouth.

  "Are you alright?" He furrowed his brow at me.

  All I could do was nod.

  "You look like you are in pain."

  And that was it, I burst into laughter.

  "I'm fine," I laughed out. "I'm so sorry." I laughed harder and covered my mouth, quickly opening my bedroom door. I tried to shut the door, but Dr. Bishop was standing in the way.

  "Is there something amusing about this evening?"

  I tried to stop laughing because he looked like he was getting red in the face, but I just couldn't help it. I shook my head no.

  "YES!" I snorted then laughed out loudly, and quickly covered my mouth again.

  The next thing I knew, he was shutting my door quickly. I thought he was going to yell at me. Instead he turned and started laughing. It was the first time I had ever heard Dr. Bishop laugh that hard, I mean it was an actual belly laugh.

  "I thought this stuff only happened on soap operas, Jerry Springer, and in trailer parks!" I laughed hysterically and fell onto one of the chairs in my living room area.

  Dr. Bishop leaned back against my bedroom door in an equally hysterical fit of laughter.

  We laughed like that for a good ten minutes until tears were being wiped from our eyes. Both of us started to gasp for air and calm down, but kept fighting off leftover chuckles.

  "Oh God," I exhaled loudly and calmed myself down.

  "My family is insane." Dr. Bishop breathed out as he regained his conservative composure.

  I straightened myself up in my chair.

  "Everyone's family is insane." I shrugged. He brought his eyes up to my face. "Some just hide it better than others." I half smiled and stood up. "I'm sorry I…lost it." I really did feel like I should apologize, everything that had been going on had to be taking a toll on him.

  "There is no need to apologize." The intensity of his gaze was hitting the highest levels. I shifted uncomfortable from my left to my right foot. "The night has definitely not been dull."

  "Um no, it really hasn't." I smiled, uncomfortably. "Well, it's getting late."

  His eyes stayed on mine and locked in a trance. I hadn't realized he stepped toward me until his hand touched my cheek.

  "Yes, I guess that it is." The warmth of his breath reached my forehead right as he leaned in to kiss my forehead. His lips lingered there for a moment and my eyes closed. I felt my body begin to warm.

  "Thank you for your assistance tonight." His lips were no longer on my forehead, the warmth of his hand was not on my cheek, and his tone was cold and collected again. When I opened my eyes, he was opening the door to my room.

  "Goodnight Ms. Ashwood." He walked out of my room, closing the door behind him.

  I groaned at myself and threw myself back into the chair. My hand touched my forehead. The tingling was still there from his lips. For a moment I lost myself in a fantasy of Dr. Bishop bursting through my door and ravaging me in this very chair.

  "What the hell am I thinking?" I growled at myself.

  After shaking off the fantasy, I climbed into bed.

  Victoria woke me the next morning and we headed downstairs to the kitchen. We were met by Mrs. Baker, Connor, and Juliet.

  "Good morning," Juliet's sweet voice greeted us.

  "Good morning," Victoria and I said in unison.

  "Jinx!" Victoria shouted at me and then ran off toward the breakfast bar laughing.

  "We have pancakes, eggs, toast, bacon, and fruit this morning. Which would you like?" Juliet offered to Victoria.

  "Hmm," she rubbed her chin and pursed her lips. "All of it." She smiled largely.

  "That's a very tall order don't you think?" I raised a brow at her and sat next to her.

  "I can handle it." She boasted with confidence.

  Half a pancake, one egg, and two pieces of toast later she was leaning against me.

  "I thought you could handle it?" I giggled at her.

  She moaned and held her stomach.

  "I am so full." Everyone laughed.

  "Those eyes of yours were bigger than your stomach, huh?" Connor teased her.

  "I don't think I can move." Victoria whined and we laughed harder.

  Dr. Bishop's entrance into the room quieted everyone.

  "Is it handled?" Connor said quickly.

  Dr. Bishop nodded and sighed. His eyes turned toward Victoria.

  "When?" Connor asked.

  "This Saturday," He answered his father.

  It was weird, but I felt as if I already knew what they were referring too.

  "She wants to start 'bonding' immediately." Dr. Bishop growled with his jaw tightly locked.

  "Oh dear," Juliet sighed.

  Instinctively I put an arm around Victoria and held her.

  "Victoria," Dr. Bishop spoke gravely.

  "Yes, daddy?" She looked at him.

  "Your mother will be here Saturday to pick you up."

  I felt Victoria stiffen.

  "What?" She glanced quickly at me with a scowl. "I thought I didn't have to live with her!" She shouted.

  "You don't," I rubbed her back.

  Dr. Bishop quickly moved in front of Victoria and knelt.

  "You are only going to visit, for the night. You will be back the next afternoon, okay?"

  "I don't want to go." She whined.

  "I know, but she has the right –"

  "She wants to see you." I cut Dr. Bishop off and pulled Victoria's face to mine.

  "Remember what we talked about?" She nodded. "Well, now you have to go, so you can tell me all about your other room. Don't you?"

  She furrowed her brow and pursed her lips.

  "I guess," she stated with a huff, "When do I have to go?"

  "Saturday," Dr. Bishop stated in a grave tone.

  "That's tomorrow!" Victoria cried out.

  "Well then we better hurry and get you all packed." I rubbed her back and tried to get her excited about the visit.

  Victoria never got excited about it. In fact, when G
race showed up to pick her up I had to carry her to the car and place her inside. Both of us had tears streaming down our faces as we waved goodbye to each other. Dr. Bishop looked angry throughout the entire scene. Once she pulled away with Victoria, I turned back into the house and went to my room.

  After twenty minutes of sulking and worrying, I realized I needed to take my mind off of things. I called Miranda. Benji and her had plans for dinner, but invited me along with them. I declined, not wanting to butt into their plans. Then I got another idea.

  I called my dad and told him I was thinking about driving down to see them. Carla and he were thrilled I was going to take the day to visit. My dad told me to call before I left. I started packing.

  It was almost one in the afternoon when I finished packing. I decided to run to the kitchen for some road trip snacks and bottles of water.

  Once I had the snacks and water I headed toward the back stairs. I passed by the dining room and saw Dr. Bishop hunched over a half empty glass of brown liquid. His head was in his hands and the half full bottle of brown liquid was to the right of him.

  "Dr. Bishop?" My voice was barely above a whisper, but I didn't want to startle him. He looked up at me with heavy, sad eyes. "Are you alright?"

  He didn't respond at first. I took a step closer and was about to speak again when he finally responded.

  "Are you going somewhere?" His eyes darted from the water and snacks back to my face.

  "I was, um, going to visit my father in Tacoma." My voice was still quiet and his eyes were still so sad and haunted.

  He snorted quietly with a half smirk before he put his head back down.

  "Do you need to talk about something?" He shook his head. I sighed. "If you need want to talk, I'll be upstairs."

  "I thought you were leaving?" He didn't raise his head.

  I didn't turn back to look at him as I responded. "I'll be upstairs."

  Once I was back in my room, I called my father and told him I would try to make it there another time. He was disappointed, but didn't give me too much guilt to deal with. We hung up with my promise to visit soon.

  I pulled on some comfortable lounge clothes and curled up on my couch with my laptop, my book outline, the TV, and the road trip snacks. After thirty minutes of TV, I muted it and put my IPod ear buds in, listening to one of my favorite play lists. I made some changes to my outline and typed my story out.