by Lacey Wolfe
“I’ve been thinking.” She grabbed her coffee mug.
He raised an eyebrow. “About?”
“Us.”
He turned the burner on. “I like that.”
“I told you a little about my mom. I have a sister too who is going down the same path. Part of me wants to get away from that life and come back here. After all, Lauren is here. I’m scared to leave my family though. I’m the only one who made something of herself, and I’m always there to help them when they need it.”
He poured batter into the frying pan. “They’re adults. You can’t live your life for them. You have to live it for you.”
She sighed and set the cup down. “I know.”
He placed the bowl on the counter and touched her knee. “You do realize I don’t care what your family is like. I’d move to Georgia if it meant I could be with you.”
“What about the ranch and your horse riding lessons?”
“I can teach anywhere, and my family can handle the ranch without me.” He rubbed her knee before he turned his attention back to the stove and flipped two pancakes. “I know I’m coming off strong. I’m pushing for more and fast.”
She ran her hand through his hair. “I like that you are. I’ve always been told I was pushy.”
He poured more batter into the pan. “That’s just what I needed.”
“I didn’t expect this. You and me.”
Neither had he. “I knew the moment I saw you.”
She laughed. “Oh, please. You didn’t like me.”
He chuckled. “I liked you all right. Something in my gut knew you were the one.”
Her smiled faded. “The one, like the one.”
Oh God, he’d freaked her out. “Well, no…” Now he was going to make it worse.
“I really like you and think we can have a future.”
He removed the pancakes in the frying pan and before pouring more batter, wrapped his arms around her waist. “What do you say? Can I go with you today?”
She licked her lips. “You’re not gonna give up, are you?”
Not on her, ever. “If you really want to go back alone, you can, and I’ll understand and respect that.”
“Let me think on it while we have breakfast.”
He released her and went back to the pancakes. Whatever she decided, he’d be fine with. Or at least, that was what he was going to keep telling himself.
* * * *
Angie rubbed her belly, unable to believe she’d eaten six pancakes. She’d really worked up an appetite after all the love they’d made the night before. Nathan had to leave for a few hours to do some chores around the farm, which left her time to think.
He was an amazing man. She believed him when he said he’d be there for her no matter what. He was a good southern boy. His mama had raised him to be a gentleman, and he’d never judge her. So why was she so nervous?
She could use Lauren right now to talk to, but she was on a plane with her husband. Angie was going to have to figure this out for herself. If only she had a mother like some of her friends. A mom she could call and get advice or a much needed pick-me-up. She rubbed her chin, realizing she still hadn’t heard back from her mom.
She wandered through the house and grabbed her phone. Maybe her sister would know what was going on with their mom. Hopefully she answered; her sister had been avoiding her calls. Shelia had called her the worst sister ever because she wouldn’t give her twenty bucks.
She scrolled through her contacts and found her sister. Sighing, she listened to the ringing.
“Hey, stranger.” Shelia sounded chipper.
“Hey, Shelia. How are you?”
“Well…” Here it came, the drama. “Because I couldn’t get that money from you, Donny broke up with me and is now with Beth.”
Donny? Who’s that? She rubbed her temple. Oh, the boyfriend of the month. “If someone is going to end things for twenty dollars, there wasn’t anything there to begin with.”
Shelia groaned. “Yeah, well, not all of us are uptight like you.”
Control yourself. She isn’t worth getting upset over. “How is Mom?”
“Well…another story there too.”
There was always a story when it came to the two of them. “Don’t delay, spit it out.”
“She got caught with coke during a speeding violation. So she’s in jail.”
Angie smacked her forehead. This wasn’t her mom’s first time in jail, but from her understanding, if she got caught again, she’d be put away for a long time. “What? Mom swore she was done with that.”
Shelia laughed. “Honey, you wouldn’t understand. You’re a goodie two shoes. You’ve never experienced the things we have.”
Thank God for that. “I’ll be home later today.”
“Do you happen to have some money I can borrow?”
Keep was more like it. “What happened to your job?”
“Man, I was an hour late and the boss got all pissy. So I walked out.”
She squeezed the bridge of her nose. “Shelia, you can’t be late, and if you are, you’ve got to call.” Her stress level was already rising. The relaxing time here was melting away and she felt like a lightning bolt ready to strike.
“I didn’t like it anyway.”
She shook her head. She could give the same spiel she always did, but what was the point? Her sister wasn’t going to listen. “I’ll see you when I get home.”
“All right. I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too.” She ended the call and held the phone to her chest. As much as she loved the idea of moving here, it was a fantasy. Her sister and mom acted like children, and if she didn’t take care of them, who would?
* * * *
Nathan pulled his muddy boots off and set them on the porch. He knocked on the door and let himself in. “Angie.”
“In the bedroom,” she called through the house.
He found her stuffing her suitcase. “You’ve still got hours, let’s do lunch.”
“About that.” She zipped it shut. “I called the airport and they have room on an earlier flight. I’ve got to get home.”
He tugged her to him, holding her by the waist. “What’s going on?”
She smiled. “This has been fun. And for a moment, I really thought I could go home, pack my life up, and move here. But in reality, I can’t. My mom’s in jail and my sister needs money, like usual. I can’t leave them. I’m too afraid of what will happen.”
Jail? Money? “I’ll come with you.”
She shook her head. “Nathan, I’d be so ashamed. Besides, your life is here. We’ve only known each other a short time. It’s unrealistic for us to be considering living together or making this more serious than it is. We know nothing about each other.” She stepped out of his grasp.
His gut sunk, hating where this was going.
“I don’t know your favorite food, what you do in your spare time. Hell, I don’t even know how Carrie broke your heart.”
Damn it! She couldn’t leave. He’d do whatever it took. “I want to share it all with you.”
“Let’s not forget, there is a whole list of things you don’t know about me. Here is the icing on the cake—my mom screwed so many men she has no idea who my father is. Heck, she was a prostitute when I was conceived. Do you really want to get involved with me? There is a whole side of my genetics I know nothing about. I could produce baby monsters.”
None of that mattered. He didn’t care. “Angie.”
She held her hand up. “Please, don’t make this harder than it has to be. I really, really, really like you, Nathan. I want to be with you so much, but I can’t. I’m so afraid if I don’t take care of my mom and sister they’ll die.”
She stood before him, tears forming in her eyes. This wasn’t about her not wanting to be with him. It was so much more. Sometimes love wasn’t enough. She had much more on her plate than he’d ever realized.
He reached out, taking her hand, and brought her to him. He
kissed her with as much passion as he could stir while his heart was breaking, once again. This wasn’t the same pain he’d felt in the past. This was worse.
When the kiss ended, he stared at her beautiful face. Her big brown eyes told him to follow, even if she didn’t know it. Angie needed someone to love and take care of her. He’d give her the space she needed. But this Carver man loved with everything in him. This wasn’t the goodbye she thought she was getting.
Chapter 10
“Tug on the rein gently, like this.” Nathan showed the woman in his class.
“It’s not hurting her?” Brenda asked with a worried expression.
“No. It lets her know to slow down.”
She nodded. “Okay. I can do this.”
Nathan stepped back to his horse and pulled himself up onto the saddle. “Bring her to a trot around the circle a few times, then stop without my help this time.”
He rode next to the woman, hoping it would ease her. The horse she was on probably sensed how tense Brenda was. Maybe he should start offering shots of liquor before lessons. These adults really needed to loosen up.
“Go a little bit faster now.”
“Okay.” She smiled.
They were finally up to a nice trot. His student seemed less agitated and more at peace. Thank goodness. He was beginning to worry.
“All right, start to slow her down now.”
She pulled the reins and spoke to the horse, who immediately listened and stopped walking. “Oh my gosh! I did it.”
He slid off his horse and patted its side. “You sure did. I’m proud of you.”
Brenda beamed. “Can you help me down?”
“I can.”
After helping her off the horse, they walked over toward the shed. He handed her some fliers he’d printed out. “Study this some. I think you’re doing great, and I’ll see you soon.”
“You don’t need me to help you clean up?”
He shook his head. The busy work kept his mind off Angie. “I got it. Go enjoy your day.”
She grabbed her purse from the shed and left. He wandered back over to the horse she’d been riding and fed her a carrot. Izzy was one of the best horses they’d ever had. She was older, but she’d never show signs of her age around them.
He pulled his phone from his back pocket and called Angie, the same way he’d done every day since she’d left.
“Hey! I’ve got great news,” she said as soon as she answered.
“Tell me.”
“I got a job!”
His heart sunk. He should be thrilled for her, but her finding a new job meant she wasn’t coming back anytime soon. “I’m happy for you.”
“Me too. It’s such a relief, especially since my sister is moving in with me for the time being.”
He resisted the urge to groan. The more he learned about her family, the more he wanted to fly to Georgia himself and tell them to grow up. Angie was too nice. He couldn’t judge her for catering to them though, since he’d never been in her place. “How long is she staying?”
“I’m really hoping to get her on her feet this time. With Mom being in jail, it seems to be a life wake-up call for Shelia. I hope.”
He rubbed the horse’s side. “I do too.” I miss you.
“Thank you for being such a great friend.”
He hated that he was now a friend. They both agreed long distance wouldn’t work and Angie was adamant that they couldn’t be together anymore, so it was a friendship or nothing. He chose to keep something. Feelings didn’t just go away, and with patience, he hoped this would all work out.
“I’ve got to go. Thanks for calling.” She ended the call before he could say bye.
Or more like I love you. I miss you. I want to see you. Hearing that wouldn’t help her.
* * * *
Angie set the phone down after talking to Nathan. He’d been calling her every day since she left. It had been a week now, and she missed him terribly. More than anything, she wanted to hop on a plane and go back to him. Get out of this hellhole.
The truth was, she didn’t have a job. And she’d spent so much money on airfare, that without income, she wasn’t sure she could make her rent next month. She’d made the decision to put her stuff in storage and stay with her sister temporarily until she found work. Yes, she had some savings, but she didn’t want to deplete it while looking for a new job. Her sister did need her. She’d been struggling bad lately, and Angie was doing everything she could to keep Shelia from following in their mom’s footsteps any more than she had.
Angie hated that she’d lied to Nathan, but if he knew the truth, he’d be there before she could blink. Being away from him, she felt broken. Her heart was with him. She knew that now. In a short time, she’d fallen in love with him, and it took over a thousand miles to realize that. It didn’t matter that she didn’t know his favorite sandwich or if he was afraid of heights. Those were little details she could learn in time. It didn’t affect her feelings for him.
“Hey.” Shelia came through the front door to the small apartment they were now sharing. “What’s for dinner?”
Angie pulled out a wood chair from the cramped dining room table. “I don’t know. I’m exhausted from moving.”
“I think this will be fun.” Shelia twisted her blonde hair around her finger. “We’ve grown apart so much. I like that we’re rooming together.”
“Me too.”
Shelia smiled. “I did go put in an application today at the fast food place you told me about. I spoke with the manager for a bit too, and I think I might have a chance.”
Angie clapped her hands together. “I’m thrilled.”
Shelia took a deep breath then said, “I promise to do better. I’m gonna take life more seriously. I want you to be proud of me.”
“You only live once, make the best of it.” Her stomach growled. “I’ve got ten bucks in my wallet. Want to hit the dollar menu?”
“Sure.”
Angie grabbed her purse, and as they walked out of the tiny apartment that had some strange odor she couldn’t place, she said, “When I get a job again, I think we should upgrade our digs.”
Shelia giggled. “You don’t like it here?”
“It’s fine.” It was a rathole, but she didn’t want to hurt her sister’s feelings. “Just cramped.”
In the car, she set her purse on the floor and placed her phone on the center console when an alert went off. She picked it up. She was due to start her period tomorrow. With everything going on, she’d forgotten about her mishap with Nathan. She didn’t see any reason why she wouldn’t get her period tomorrow. Her stomach had been cramping, her breasts were tender, and she’d had the headache that always came before her time of the month.
* * * *
The phone rang again and Angie already knew who was calling. She’d been avoiding his call the last few days. She’d been avoiding the world as she became a couch potato.
Shelia had gotten the job and was working the day shift. She’d already met some guy there and her evenings had been spent with him. Angie had to admit, the guy seemed pretty clean. He didn’t come across like the past guys, mixed up with drugs and alcohol. They were at the movies this evening then Shelia would be home around nine.
Angie stared at the tablet screen, scrolling through the job classifieds on a popular job hunter website. She’d already submitted her resume to several places, now she just had to wait. The waiting sucked.
Her phone lit up. A new voicemail she wasn’t going to listen to. A moment later, her phone rang again. Only this time it was Lauren’s ringtone. Crap. She was gonna have to answer.
She slid her finger across the screen. “Hey, girl.”
“It’s Nathan.”
Fuck. She couldn’t believe Lauren would do that to her. “Oh, hey. You caught me at a good time. I just left my office.”
“The new job is going well?”
She hated lying, but she forced the words out. “Fantastic. My co-workers are wond
erful. We’ve been getting drinks each night after work.”
“Why haven’t you called me back?”
Tears built in her eyes. She’d been doing a lot of crying lately. Everything made her weep. “We’re friends, remember?”
“Yeah, I know. Doesn’t mean you can’t call or text me.”
“I’ve been feeling a little...” Just say smothered and he’ll leave you alone. But she couldn’t. She loved this man.
“You’ve been feeling what?”
“I don’t know. I’ve got to go. I don’t want to drive and talk, because I don’t have Bluetooth.”
He let out a frustrated sigh. “Fine. Sorry for bothering you. I was worried about you, if you couldn’t tell from my voicemails. Lauren got a call from your landlord that you’d moved without paying your last month’s rent.”
Why had her landlord called Lauren? Oh yeah, she’d put her down as the person to call in case of an emergency.
“Last I knew, your sister was moving in with you. Did that change?”
She placed her forehead in her palm. “It’s not a good time. I’ve got to go.”
She heard the shuffling of the phone then Lauren came on the line. “Hold on a minute. Let me get somewhere alone.”
A tear dropped down her cheek. “Okay.”
“All right, I’m outside, away from Nathan. What’s going on? I just got back from my honeymoon and found Nathan worried sick. And I can’t say I blame him.”
The tears continued to flow. Lauren had that effect on her. “Things aren’t good at the moment, but I don’t want him to know.”
“What did your family drag you into this time?”
“Nothing. Mom’s in jail.”
“What!”
She pulled the hem of her shirt up and wiped her eyes. “I didn’t tell you because you were on your honeymoon. I’m living with Shelia for the time being, helping her get on her feet so she doesn’t turn out like Mom.”
“Damn it, Angie. They aren’t lost puppies. They are adults. Your sister is twenty-six for fuck’s sake. She needs to grow the hell up.”
“She is. She’s got a new job, and she’s dating a new guy who is nice.”
“I hope she really is getting her shit together this time. But why avoid Nathan?” Her tone lowered. “And lie. After all the lies his ex told.”
