Our Story Needs No Filter

by Sudeep Nagarkar

  Raghu woke up next day to an emotional message:

  I never thought it would be so easy. You don’t know how stressed I was by that thought. But last night, you made me feel so comfortable. I had already planned half a dozen ways to try and convince you, but not even one of them was needed. That shows how much you value this relationship and care for my feelings. I have started respecting you more, even if you did spill all the rajma on the floor. I love you. Every thought of yours is mine and every decision of mine is yours. I hope you understand the last line . . .

  He smiled, and typed back, I thought we agreed that the rajma wasn’t my fault! Love you.☺

  I love you too, Ruhi replied, followed with a dozen hearts.

  ‘It’s so good to see Raghu and Ruhi together,’ Chris said, as he accompanied Megha to the lecture hall.

  ‘Touch wood,’ she replied.

  ‘Did you consider talking to Jai again?’

  ‘Unless I am very sure, I just can’t. I like him but he has a lot to achieve in his life and I don’t want to get in the way of that. I don’t want to force my decision on him.’

  Chris rolled his eyes. ‘I’m sure you won’t be forcing him.’

  ‘I just don’t want to intimidate him into making any rash decision,’ Megha said, looking into her bag for her notebook. ‘Oh no! I have forgotten all my notes in my room.’ She rummaged through her bag once more and decided to go back to her room to get them.

  ‘I’ll move towards my lecture hall then. Hope you don’t mind,’ Chris said as he was already late for his lecture which was scheduled in the adjacent building.

  ‘Sure. You carry on,’ Megha replied as she walked through the corridors, taking in the beautiful landscape and pleasant sunshine, her mind drifting over happy memories. Lost in thought, she strolled along, until she glanced at her watch and realized the time. He was late.

  She started walking faster and decided to take the shortcut to her room, through the back of the campus. The passage was deserted and as she walked through it, she could hear only the sound of her own footsteps. She saw a blurry figure standing at one end of the passage and something about it caught her attention; the person was standing facing the wall. As she went closer, she registered that he was urinating.

  Disgusted, she shouted, ‘Don’t you have any etiquette? This is a college campus and you are urinating out in the open. I’ll complain about you to the authorities.’

  When the person turned around, she saw it was Akhilesh. And instead of apologizing, he began shouting.

  ‘Don’t teach me about rules. I am free to do as I like! Go file a complaint against me, you slut, I don’t care.’

  ‘You are such a hypocrite. Such double standards. On one hand you talk about the safety of women and their dignity and now this . . .’ Megha shook her head in disgust.

  ‘You need mental treatment. I’m not going to forget this! Mark my words, I am going to destroy you!’ he shouted, staring in her direction as she started to walk away.

  Megha collected her notes and went straight back to the lecture hall. She wanted to teach Akhilesh a lesson for insulting her, but she was well aware that he, as an SCI representative, had a strong network. She knew that filing a complaint against him would not do any good. Yet, she wanted to do something.

  In the end, she did what she knew best—writing on Facebook.

  We are creating fake revolutionaries: My open letter to the pseudo-representative of Women’s Dignity, Mr Akhilesh.

  I am shocked to see that a misogynist like Akhilesh is being hailed as a revolutionary. I want to ask him—Is unzipping your pants in public and urinating in the corridors part of the revolutionary tools you use to protect women’s dignity?

  These pseudo revolutionaries were standing up for women’s safety on 31 December and stopping students from leaving the campus. Women no longer need to leave the college to feel unsafe, they can do so right here. I am writing this letter because I had an ugly encounter with this newly appointed leader Mr Akhilesh. This was not the first bad experience I have had with him, but hopefully it will be the last. He threatened me, insulted me and suggested that I need psychiatric help. When I see a male urinating in public, I feel that it is unsafe for me and my fellow females. This is what I tried to explain to him when his fragile male ego got hurt.

  You claimed that you are free to do as you please, but does that mean there are no consequences for you? Is urinating in public your idea of freedom? This highlights the shallowness of your political and revolutionary ideologies. Please update your definitions of revolution and freedom. Freedom is not just about public urination and smoking in a ‘No Smoking’ area, it is much more than that. I am saddened and upset to see that my MGU is supporting these fake revolutionaries.

  Within the next few hours, the post went viral on social media and there arose several opinions, some in favour and some against it. All her friends stood by her as she started getting harassed by Akhilesh’s supporters soon after the post was uploaded. Raghu, Ruhi, Chris and Jai faced equal hostility from SCI students who tried their best to undermine them. However, they were prepared for this, knowing the unstable temperament of the SCI.

  It didn’t take much time for the post to be picked up by the media, and by the next day, it was breaking news throughout Delhi. Jai had asked his friends in the ABCP to keep Megha’s name out of the news, as she did not want to become a political spokesperson for MGU. With the request of ABCP students, Megha’s name was not mentioned anywhere.

  While the SCI claimed that all the allegations in the post were false, it was the ABCP who took up the stand for women’s safety and demanded that strict action be taken against Akhilesh. They firmly supported Megha and forced the authorities to take quick action. The authorities, unable to ignore such immense pressure from the students, the media and almost everyone else, reprimanded Akhilesh with a fine of Rs 5000 and a strict warning.

  It was not a personal battle for Megha; she was simply fed up with the way people insulted women and did what they pleased around campus. For her, it was about promoting self-respect for every girl in the college and having the freedom to express her thoughts. She had wanted to retaliate in some form and the outcome had turned out to be better than she could ever have imagined!

  Nine

  27 April 2016

  The mood inside the campus was uncertain. The students’ ideologies were fickle and the people who influenced them, unreliable. While Krishna and Akhilesh left no stone unturned to back the AISC and SCI respectively, the ABCP too was not left far behind. The only thing on solid ground was the friendship of Jai and his group.

  Jai continued to support the ABCP whenever they needed his help but this never distracted him from being there for his friends in times of need. Megha too continued to voice her opinions, no longer afraid of a retaliation from Akhilesh. She was confident in every aspect of her life, except of her feelings for Jai. Chris on the other hand preferred to stay away from all the political drama on campus except when his friends were involved. Ruhi’s love affair with PETA continued and she had managed to keep Raghu away from non-vegetarian food ever since they had started dating. Raghu, on the other hand, no longer cared for non-vegetarian food since he was having the time of his life with her.

  The newspapers that day, however, announced more turbulence for MGU as the story of the missing student resurfaced: ‘Over 100 days and counting, MGU student Mani still missing . . . Justice delayed is justice denied . . . Protests all over but no leads found. Delhi Police fails once again in their investigations’, screamed one.

  ‘The court hearings continue but Mani’s parents feel those are just a formality as Delhi Police has lost hope with no leads after ABCP and AISC were found clean’, said another

  ‘“We have lost our kid . . . just because we are poor,” claim parents of missing child’, said yet another.

  Mani had been missing since the first week of January and even after 100 days no one understood what exactly had happen
ed to him. The SCI decided to term it as a big political scandal. But without any proof, their claims were baseless, especially when the Delhi Police found no involvement of the AISC or the ABCP in the matter. However, the SCI stayed strong in their stand against the AISC, who in turn continued to pass the blame to the ABCP. The slow progress of the case had put even the college administration under scrutiny.

  ‘We will not let them overpower us. Even after strong connections have been found between the AISC and Mani’s disappearance, the police have failed to take any action. A student goes missing from the national capital of India and no one knows where he is? Doesn’t that make it clear that there are strong political powers involved? We must get to the truth before more steps are taken to cover up his kidnapping,’ Akhilesh said, addressing his students.

  When Krishna was asked about his opinion on the matter, he said that Mani might have left because he felt threatened by the ABCP. ‘I don’t think he has been kidnapped or been in any kind of accident. If that was the case, then the Delhi Police would have found at least one lead by now. This means that he has left of his own free will, fearing the anger of the ABCP. The case should be closed, according to me,’ he said.

  The ABCP stuck to what they had been saying since day one. A representative of the ABCP said, ‘Haven’t we been saying the same thing since the investigation began? Those who are blaming us are simply frustrated because they cannot find any concrete clues. Both the AISC and the Delhi Police have tried to pin this on us multiple times but have failed, as there is simply no evidence of our involvement. We are not looking for any political gain from this incident, all we are saying is that a student from our campus has gone missing and instead of taking any radical steps to find him, everyone is just playing blame games.’

  And so the allegations continued. No one thought about the student who was probably in a dire situation, or about his parents who cried every day, fearing the worst. Every one tried to milk the situation to further their political agenda. It seemed as if the university was stuck in a raging tempest which showed no signs of abating.

  ‘I don’t know why, but I feel that Jai’s friends from the ABCP are behind Mani’s kidnapping,’ Raghu said.

  ‘Who’s Mani?’ Ruhi was not in the least concerned about campus politics.

  ‘The missing student.’

  ‘Oh yeah, what happened about that? And why would Jai’s friends do such a thing, they seemed so nice when they helped us escape campus.’

  ‘I am not saying they are bad, I just have this gut feeling that they are somehow involved. I don’t think all this business is just about the fight Mani had with the AISC and ABCP students. I think it’s something bigger than that. There are many things hidden inside his missing reports which some people are trying to erase. Maybe it’s because he was from another religion.’

  ‘Raghu, you are thinking about it too much. And who talks about this stuff on a date anyway. You’re supposed to be getting cosy with me, not discussing some morbid details about a student going missing,’ Ruhi said, getting annoyed.

  They were at Lord of the Drinks in Rajouri Garden to celebrate their three-month anniversary. Ruhi was a little upset that Raghu was lost in his own thoughts when the ambience of the restaurant was so romantic and their table so secluded. It was a perfect setting to do so many other things, rather than discuss some missing boy. When Raghu finally emerged from his thoughts, he realized that Ruhi was looking stunning. He immediately wiped away all the political drama from his head and started tickling her waist.

  I’m nervous. I’ve never done this before. Raghu was sure he would mess it up in public.

  ‘Don’t be nervous. Mistakes are to be expected,’ Ruhi said softly, sensing his anxiety. They were both a little apprehensive. After all, until now, they had kissed and explored each other only behind closed doors.

  ‘I love the way you speak,’ Raghu whispered, playing with the waistband of her skirt.

  ‘How?’

  ‘You are pretty outspoken in all the things that matter to you.’

  ‘Like my love for animals?’ She laughed.

  ‘Is that your way of making me feel better?’ Raghu shuddered, starting to panic about the display of public intimacy.

  ‘What I mean is that no first time is perfect, it’s not like the movies.’

  ‘I suppose so, have you done this before?’

  Damn, she must be an expert in this. I wish I had taken biology seriously or even public speaking, I would have sounded so much more confident, thought Raghu.

  ‘It doesn’t matter, you have me now. So don’t be nervous,’ Ruhi cajoled him.

  Raghu moved closer, leaving no space between them. Reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear, he was rewarded with a view of her bare neck. ‘I really care for you, Ruhi,’ he murmured.

  ‘I care for you too, Raghu. I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else.’

  ‘Good.’

  He slid his hands down her shoulders and almost started kissing her when he heard someone say, ‘Sir, your order.’

  The moment Raghu realized the waiter had come to their table, he sprung away from Ruhi.

  ‘Sir, your aloo-mattar,’ the waiter said, hiding a smile.

  Embarrassed, Raghu nodded but couldn’t meet his eye. Ruhi adjusted her clothes as the waiter began serving them. Raghu was shocked by her casual attitude. Seeing his alarmed face, Ruhi laughed. ‘I told you, mistakes were to be expected.’

  ‘Shit, that was so embarrassing,’ he said once the waiter left, and joined in the laughter.

  ‘The waiter did a surgical strike on us.’

  ‘Yeah, and I was so close to kissing you.’

  ‘I love the innocence in your eyes,’ Ruhi said, shifting closer to him again.

  ‘Why?’

  ‘They say a lot . . . about your love for me, about your honesty in our relationship. I admire you more every day.’

  ‘It’s all you, you make me feel so comfortable, and I feel like I can finally be myself. You have transformed me, Ruhi.’

  ‘All I did was make you realize your worth.’

  After a comfortable silence, Ruhi gave him a kiss on his cheek. ‘I want to change one more thing though, your susceptible nature . . .’

  ‘Now what?’

  ‘You were so easily convinced to make out with me in public, even though your heart was against it.’

  ‘That’s because I love you.’

  ‘No, it’s not only about me. I have seen it happen with other people too.’

  ‘Okay, madam. Now can we eat our food or do you want to change my eating style as well?’ Raghu smiled.

  ‘Shut up.’

  Raghu had always skipped the romantic parts in books, but he now understood their significance, living his own real-life romance. He even started feeling the side-effects of not attending sex education classes in school.

  After finishing their dinner, they came back to a quiet campus. On the way back to Ruhi’s hostel, they passed a dark and deserted stretch from the back gate. There was not a single soul to be seen, and adrenaline rushed through both of them. Ruhi glanced up to see Raghu advancing towards her.

  ‘Are you sure?’ she whispered.

  ‘Yes, I am quite sure and this time it’s not because of anyone else’s influence.’

  ‘What if someone sees us?’ Ruhi said, acting coy.

  ‘No one will come, unless you moan too loudly,’ Raghu said wickedly, pinning her against the wall of the building.

  He leaned down and started a trail of kisses along her neck. As she tilted her head back to give him full access, she wrapped her hands around his neck and pulled him closer. She moaned softly. She wondered how long it had been since he’d been with a girl, and shivered as his breath tickled her neck and face. His teeth skimmed the surface of her skin, not hard enough to break the surface but enough to make her weak with pleasure.

  ‘You’re such a dirty bird,’ she said smirking.

  ‘Yes, but I’m your d
irty bird.’

  Their eyes burned with passion and they were transported into a world of ecstasy. Raghu pushed her to the ground and began to fumble with the waistband of her skirt.

  ‘Not here,’ Ruhi interrupted.

  ‘Are you afraid of being caught or are you getting too influenced by me?’ Raghu winked, bringing up their earlier conversation of him being too easily manipulated by other people.

  ‘None of it. But let’s go to your room.’

  Still in control of his senses, Raghu knew that there would be someone keeping watch over his hostel because of the missing student. He pulled Ruhi behind a bush and without wasting any time, began the art of exploration. Ruhi heard him growl in appreciation as he pulled her skirt up to her waist, seeing her body.

  ‘You’re so beautiful, Ruhi,’ Raghu whispered, his voice deep with passion. ‘I want to hear you scream my name. I want to hear your whimper as you beg for release.’

  They looked deep into each other’s eyes, disconnected from reality, lost in the wave of their emotions. Ruhi realized that every kiss before this had been wrong as he held her tightly. The bush seemed to be alight with the heat of their love.

  ‘You are amazing. I never thought there were such intense emotions burning inside you. You can move the earth with your strength,’ Ruhi said, relaxing against him, ‘I can lie here with you forever. I love your voice, I love your body; I love you.’ She wrapped her arms around his body, pulling him on top of her.

  ‘We can’t. Look where we are.’

  ‘It doesn’t matter, I belong to you,’ she declared. Raghu let go of his past and future and surrendered himself to the moment. He was with Ruhi and she was with him, and in that second, nothing else in the world mattered.

  28 April 2016

  The sunbeams were reflected on Jai’s teacup as he picked it up to have another sip. It was his fifth cup since the morning, which made Megha a little curious.