Princess Rescue Inc

by Chris Hechtl

  The man tried to step back but Edsfield pinned his arms from behind. Erin took a brief moment to do a pat down, and then came up with a worn leather pouch. He held it up.

  It was the guard captain's turn to snarl as he took it and looked inside. He sniffed and then closed the bag. “Yes it was him. I can tell, they left their droppings within,” he said. He turned on the man.

  “How many,” Ryans asked, getting up when the guard finished checking under the bed. He used a pole to stab at the dark recesses then nodded. Ryans nodded back. He pushed his wife's sword away gently.

  “I asked you a question,” he said coldly, locking eyes with the man. The suspect growled but said nothing. A guard punched him hard in the solar plexus. He gasped, but held up as he was by Edsfield he couldn't double over, as much as his diaphragm wanted to. He gasped, and then spat.

  “How. Many. More,” Ryans asked. He took the bag from the captain. “How many?” He shook the bag as Edsfield grabbed the hair on the back of the man's head and pulled it up and back hard.

  “No more,” the guard rasped.

  “Who put you up to this sirrah. The lizards are rare and banned,” Deidra said pulling a robe over her shoulders.

  The man licked his lips gasping. Spittle dribbled from his mouth. “I... do not wish to say.”

  She glared at him. “Your life is forfeit you know. You can answer me now, or spend a week with the torturers.”

  The man's eyes were wide. He shook his head back and forth.

  “Or we can just use Hammurabi justice and let your lizard friend convince you,” Ryans said smiling. It wasn't a nice smile as the suspect noted, darting a terrified glance at him.

  “No, no, you can't, you won’t,” he said, voice rising as he started to whimper.

  “Oh I will,” Ryans smiled as he held up the bag. “What do you think, just stick it over his head?” he asked turning to the captain.

  The captain gulped darting a glance to Deidra. “Ah.”

  “Well...” Deidra said looking thoughtful. She tapped her long finger against her chin.

  Scooter and Erin were busy helping Edsfield with the now hysterical prisoner. They pinned him to the ground as Edsfield used a zip tie on his wrists, locking them together behind his back. The man was shouting and crying.

  “Tis a fate worse than death my liege,” Erin said getting up once the prisoner was secured. “Please tell me you won’t. The torturers are much preferable to that... thing.” He indicated the bag.

  “Please, a clean death, a clean death!” the man sobbed looking around.

  “That bad huh?” Ryans asked, looking at the bag.

  “A living death, one bite and you cannot move or speak but can still hear and see. They crawl into your mouth...”

  “Or other orifice,” another guard interjected darkly. Deidra darted him a dark look. “Sorry your majesty.”

  “Or elsewhere and then lay their eggs. Once the eggs hatch they eat you from the inside. The parent stays with them through the winter.”

  “Oh gross,” Edsfield said shaking his head. “Right out of a horror movie. Alien or something.”

  “Exactly,” Ryans said nodding. “It hesitated though.”

  “They are attracted to heat Dominus. Most likely the fire confused it,” Maximus explained.

  “Ah. So he slipped them under the door after the fire died down?” Ryans asked, turning to Janon.

  Maximus nodded. “Most likely. They are usually near the winter sleeps now.”

  Ryans frowned. “Oh. So that's what you meant by rare?”

  “That bloody merchant!” Deidra snarled turning on the prisoner. “He put you up to this sirrah?”

  The prisoner gibbered shaking his head.

  “He is new my lady. I...” The captain sighed.

  “He was my brother!” the man snarled looking up. “My brother! You punished him for those leaves!”

  “Oh. Revenge,” Deidra nodded. Now she understood, his brother was the one who had imported the leaves into the barracks. He had supplied the drug that had killed that young man and he'd been caught and punished for it. She stood back and waved her hand. “Take him away.”

  “Something tells me I'm not going to get any sleep tonight,” Ryans said shaking his head. He turned to his wife who was shaking a little. “And from the looks of things you aren't either huh?” he asked. She shook her head as he gathered her into his arms.

  The others quietly left. He sighed as they closed the door. “Okay, let's go down to the kitchen and get some food and let the captain do a thorough search huh?”

  “You...” She looked up to him.

  “What, you think I believed him and there's only the two?” he asked. They both darted a look around. She nodded and gulped, hand clutched to her dagger.

  “Yes, wise.”

  He chuckled as he opened the door. “After you.”

  <==={}------------>

  “You don't have to move in here if you don't want to... or if you’re not ready you know,” he murmured to her as they stood outside the door to the royal suite. She shook her head then reached for the handle.

  Like most of the wooden bits in the tower the door had been rebuilt... or in this case replaced. From the look of it Max had upgraded it.

  “Hang on, there's tradition to be observed you know,” he said as he swung her up into his arms.

  “What are you doing?” she squeaked in surprise looking up to him.

  “Complaining?” he asked smiling down at her.

  “Um...” He kissed her. She sighed, eyes closed. “No.” she said, lips curving up into a smile as she nuzzled against him.

  “Thought not,” he rumbled and awkwardly opened the door with a finger and a foot.

  “There, have to carry the newlywed lady over the threshold,” he said. He carried her into the room and then swung her about. She clung to his neck tightly, squealing a little in surprise. “Nice. I could get used to this,” he murmured. The room was a fairly empty space; most of the walls were still a little sooty from the fire. It had a lot of potential he had to admit. The floors and doors were new, gleaming raw wood ready for paint or stain. Hopefully Max had taken a look at the structure and made sure it was still sound. He wasn't sure but he'd definitely have a word. He looked around and then down to her. “And this,” he said. He smiled. She blushed a little and giggled.

  “Me to,” she said then wiggled and squirmed. Obviously she wanted down.

  “Okay, okay,” he said. He set her down upon her feet and looked away as she brushed the wrinkles out of her dress.

  “You’re really going to stay here?” he asked.

  “We,” she said, then looked up. “We're going to stay here.” She caught his hand with hers. He sighed, knowing that look and tone. There was no use arguing with her, it'd just be a waste of blood pressure. She gave him a reproving glance. He rolled his eyes.

  “Well, if that's the case we're definitely making some upgrades. No offense dear, but I'm not freezing my can off come winter time,” he said firmly. He pointed to the windows. They were large, once covered in lead lined colored glass. Now they were smoke charred gaping holes.

  “We'll have to do something about them, weatherize them or something. Double pane at least.” He explained.

  She nodded. “Yes, mother always complained about the terrible drafts.” She shivered a little. He gave her a look but she nodded.

  “It looks like Max and his motley crew have put in provisions for upgrades though.” He looked up to the ceiling above, pursing his lips in thought. Some of the beams were charred but others looked good. “Well, with the rafters in each floor we've got space to run plumbing and electrical lines so that's not a problem. The walls will be a nuisance though. We're definitely going to need insulation,” he said. He shivered a little and then turned back to her.

  “What's in here?” he asked looking in an open room. “Bedroom? All right...” He turned to the opposite room and pointed.

  “Mother's drawing r
oom,” Deidra said. She pointed to two other doors. “That one leads to mother's... I mean my dressing room, that one to yours,” she explained. He grunted.

  “Your mother was an artist?” he asked coming over to the drawing room entryway. She'd said drawing but the translator had translated it as art. He was sure it wasn't an art room.

  Deidra shook her head. “No, it's a room for her to sit in and receive guests.” She pointed to a rocking chair in the corner. It was one of the few pieces to survive the fire. The other was a scorched spinning wheel. “Mother said she rocked us to sleep in that when we were babies,” she murmured. She picked up a thimble and hugged it to her chest for a moment. He hugged her to his side.

  “Family heirloom, so it stays. Think it'll get some use?” he teased running a hand through her hair.

  “It'd better,” she growled, eyes glittering as she clutched at him, pulling at his belt and shirt. He chuckled.

  “Ah, what about your hobbies?” he asked. “I know you can't practice sword fighting up here, but do you have any um... quieter ones?” he asked suggestively. She chuckled.

  “I was never into needlepoint or knitting like mother and most of the other Domina. Making dresses...” She set the thimble down on the chair. She looked down at her new dress then shrugged. “I like the design, but the sheer drudgery is taxing.”

  “Yeah. So that eliminates those, what about drawing? Painting? Sculpting? Reading? Or other things?” he asked.

  She blinked at him then shrugged. “I do like to read,” she said softly looking down.

  “So do I,” he said equally softly as he rubbed her neck and shoulders. “Now that we've got books, we can do that. So we'll need a nice place for you to curl up by the fire place. Comfortable so you can read your steamy romance novels,” he teased, not sure she'd understand that barb. She blinked and then gave him another glower. He ignored it and turned back to the main room.

  “Floors will have to be done, stained. Carpet in the bedroom of course. Electricity to,” he said. She nodded mutely. “We'll need to pick a stain, since the room does get some good lighting what do you think a light gold stain?”

  Deidra came in and crouched, pulling her hem up and running her hand over the wood. “So smooth,” she murmured.

  “Belt sander,” Ryans answered. He was sure of it now.

  “What did you mean by light?” she asked looking up.

  “Light as opposed to dark. A light stain, something close to what the color of the wood is now. Or a clear, which would preserve its current color but protect it.”

  She nodded. “Clear is better. Dark would be...” She stood up and hugged herself. The late fall weather had broken the long heat streak and temperatures were not getting out of the sixties now and dropping into the thirties at night. “I don't like dark. It makes me feel sad.”

  He smiled as he hugged her. “Right, light or clear it is,” he said, not sure where they would get it. He looked around. “Definitely need insulation in the floor and ceilings. We can't insulate the walls, at least not much now... we could add an inner wall I suppose, but that would limit the space inside and use a lot of wood. We'll have to wait on foam core insulation I guess,” he sighed. She nodded.

  “What's this?” he asked pointing to a crack in the wall.

  She smirked, pushing it shut. “Secret passage. I'll show you later. The stairs were wood; they may not have been remade.”

  “Ah,” he nodded. “Watch that first step it’s a doozy in other words. Long fall down,” he said dryly. He chuckled as she elbowed him.

  “Okay, what's this room?” he pointed to another room.

  “The bath,” she said.

  “Ah,” he nodded. “Well, royalty does have its privileges.” He let her go to go over and look. He opened the door and looked inside. It was a spacious room with a small window and a large cast iron tub. He nodded. “Definitely in need of an upgrade.” He smiled at her.

  “The... shower I think you called it?” she asked amused. She came over and rested her arms around him. “We can move the tub, or replace it.” The old tub had been cracked in the fire when it had fallen through the floor.

  “That and other fine indoor plumbing items. Like a toilet. Definitely one of those. I'd say... over there right?” he asked. He looked down at her as he pointed.

  She nodded. “I did like the one in the camper.”

  “Right. I miss it sometimes too actually,” he chuckled. He spotted a stained ceramic pedestal in a corner near the small open window. “I think that is or was a wash basin sink right? The pedestal?” She nodded. “Okay well, once we get some running water we can have a fully functional sink. Hot and cold water. For the shower and tub too... though I'd like to see a hot tub if we can swing it,” he said and then smiled wickedly. She blinked.

  “Baths aren't hot enough?”

  He laughed. “I'll have to show you later dear,” he said and then smiled once more as she kissed him.

  Chapter 30

  “How's kindergarten going?” Perry asked looking at Ryans. Ryans shrugged. They were standing in the corner watching the class settle in. Things were getting back to normal now that the epidemic had run its course and the new Queen was settling into her role. Some of the lords had returned to their homes but a few were reluctant. The students were sitting at rough wooden desks, with simple stools. They didn't look all that comfortable. Some of the kids squirmed. Now that winter had officially started with a thicker dusting of snow from the night before that stayed all day the kids had nothing better to do. So, the parents had reluctantly allowed them to attend school.

  “To be expected. Slow. But we're getting somewhere. Unfortunately some of the parents think of this as free daycare, and some are scared we're going to abduct their kids and experiment on them. The playground was a bit of a hit though,” he grinned at that.

  The playground was a simple affair, swings, teeter totters, jungle gym, tether ball, slide and a play field for the Kingdom's version of soccer. The kids and even some of the adults had been enthralled by the whole idea. Some weren't so happy however, and of course the kids couldn't really make use of it when there was snow on the ground. “A few of the high and mighty are offended since this is a mixed class. We've got backlash from the rich men tutors too.”

  “Ah. Yeah, have fun with that,” Perry chuckled. He nodded his chin to a few adults in the room. They and a handful of teens were in the back of the class. “Interesting age selection. Reminds me of a couple of redneck jokes I've heard in my day.”

  Ryans smiled. “At least they're trying. You've got to give them credit for that.”

  “Thought there was a special adult class for them though?” Perry asked. “Night school?”

  Ryans shrugged. “Yeah well, some have different schedules.”

  “Or some genius put the notice up on paper on the local billboards?”

  Ryans sighed, covering his eyes. “Don't remind me.” He shook his head. “We've got town criers out telling people that the second class is tomorrow.”

  “Heard it was a big hit,” Perry said dryly.

  “Yeah, packed house. So packed we had to rent three taverns next door for the overflow and we still had people in the streets. We've got our work cut out for us. That's for sure,” Ryans sighed. Education was one of Sue's new priorities, Education, health, and welfare. Her majesty had just appointed Sue as the Imperium's first minister of medicine.

  “Yeah. At least they're willing and eager.”

  “Some of them anyway, but some idiots have started a whisper campaign so we've got some resistance. It's going to take time for inertia to set in and take over,” Ryans said testily.

  “Yeah. I ran into that when we set this up for the soldiers a month ago,” Perry nodded.

  “A month ago?”

  “Yup. Literacy is an important skill in combat. Knowing how to read a map or directions in a battle...”

  Ryans held up a hand. “Gotcha. Good point. Can I borrow a couple of your trainers?�
��

  Perry shrugged. “Sure. As long as I can send in some recruiters to show the uniform and get the pick of the litter,” Perry countered.

  “Deal,” Ryans nodded. “Wish other problems were this easy to work out.”

  “Yeah,” Perry chuckled. “Keeping politics out is the best way to success,” he waved. “I'll send the trainers by tonight. Enjoy.” He waved as the class settled down. The teacher glanced their way as Perry left.

  “All right class, we're going to start with the alphabet. These are the letters that make up words and names. By the end of the class we're going to teach you the letters of each of your names. Let’s start with you Setima … Your name starts with an S...”

  Ryans nodded as the class buckled down to work.

  “Another project?” Cromwell, lord of Aborth looked down his regal nose at the royal pair. “I hear you're replacing the royal tub? Isn't that an extravagance?” he asked, with a slight sneer. Deidra was still digging into changes in the Imperium, one of the reasons some of the lords had lingered.

  One thing the old Queen had accomplished before her death was changing the cabinet and streamlining it. She'd found that a full five ministers had died, some years ago and others had been taking their money without approval. Others were doing the same job, adding layers of bureaucracy that had taken a week to sort out. She'd finally settled into dividing them into covering the districts and firing one old coot.

  Deidra had her hands full now, since her new reign meant the lords had a say in all her appointments. Parliament had to vote to approve each minister and could demand investigations if one overstepped his or her bounds. Unfortunately the plague had killed a few of the ministers and the lords hadn't stuck around long enough to approve their replacements.

  Until parliament reconvened the ministers would serve as interim ministers, using a small quorum of the lords on site for provisional approval.

  Some, like the new interim minister of immigration, were turning out to be a pain in the ass to the gaijin. She insisted on interviews with each of them and was chasing some of them around, trying to get them to marry or breed.