“Nope. Nothing. I don’t really care. I’m hooking up with someone else now anyway.”
Brianne confirmed it. Nothing happened between them in the hut. It should make me feel better, but it doesn’t. He still went, he’s still a liar. He’s still Josh.
In the middle of the night, I sneak over to Cassie’s bed and wake her up.
“I need to go somewhere real quick. Are you okay if I leave, I promise I’ll be back in less than an hour,” I whisper so I won’t disturb the sleeping campers.
“Are you okay?” Cassie sits up. “You’re not leaving the grounds are you? We’re not even supposed to leave our cabins at night unless it’s an emergency.”
When the campers are there, no one is allowed to leave the grounds without permission. But I need to go somewhere. To me it’s an emergency.
“I’m fine. I just need to do something. I’ll be back as soon as I can, I promise.”
I sneak out in the dark with my keys and purse. I don’t use a flashlight and wait to turn my headlights on until I’m out of the parking lot relying on the few dimly lit lamp posts. Phone in hand I drive until I see enough bars of service, pull over and park.
“Hello?” Ashley’s sleepy voice answers.
“You said I could call day or night if I needed you. And I need you.”
“About that guy?”
“Yes, Tucker.”
“What do you need?”
“I just need to hear you remind me how stupid this is.”
“It’s stupid.”
“It is right?”
“Tessa, listen to me, it’s very stupid.”
“Alright, thanks, that’s all I needed.”
“You really like this guy that much?”
I don’t answer.
“Geez, Tessa, really?” Ashley sighs into the phone.
“I don’t know.”
“Please keep calling me. I’ll get you through this. I can’t let you go through the same shit all over again. Not after you’ve come so far. Tessa, just remember how much that hurt last year.”
“You’re right. Thanks, Ash, I’m probably going to keep calling you.”
I drive back to camp, feeling much better than I did. In the parking lot I tiptoe past the row of parked cars stopping in front of the red truck with Jersey plates.
Yeah. I do like him that much. I really do.
Maybe if I tell Ashley more about him, maybe there’s a way to get her to tell me its okay? Maybe if I stop telling her only about all the bad things and tell her about some of the good things, like the date we went on with breakfast and bowling, or about how he walked me to my cabin, came to check on me the night of the storm, our spot on the rock.
Every time I think of these good things I wonder if he is really like Josh. Am I labeling Tucker because of his past? Ashley has a past. Maybe if I start actually telling her more about Tucker she’ll help me figure out if there’s a way it could work for us.
If anyone can help, I know it’s her.
Cassie
More freaking rain. We’re stuck inside with our unhappy campers who are huddled around a laptop watching a DVD.
Tessa and I lie across my bed with the fan pointed at us. Tessa is in a cute yellow tank top and I’m all butched up in black t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up. This place is hot, sticky and moist all the time. I swear the second I see the first leaf fall this year I’m going to dance for joy.
I pull a picture out of the book where I keep it hidden and study it. My favorite picture, me and Mark at the prom. We went together as friends. There was no one else I wanted to go with. I smile down at the picture of Mark lifting me up so our mothers could get a good picture of the red Converse I was wearing underneath my black gown. We’re laughing in the picture, eyes sparkling, and happy faces. It was the start of the best night. Dancing, laughing, I wanted to jump up and kiss him in the worst way and I might’ve done it if hadn’t been for our principal. He grabbed the microphone to make a short speech about prom safety and reminded us graduation was only a few weeks away. Yes, graduation then college. I didn’t let it ruin the good time we were having like it usually did when I got the reminder Mark would be leaving soon, but it did remind me why kissing him was out of the question.
Mark’s fast relationship with Courtney proves to me what’s going to happen when he goes away to college. I’m not mad about it, or at least I shouldn’t be. That’s what supposed to happen when people go away. They’re supposed to party and have fun. Not sit around with a girlfriend at home, or worse, party and have fun, cheating on a girlfriend at home.
Tessa puts her hand out. “Let me see the picture you’re looking at.”
I hand it to her and she gives me the biggest smile. “This is an awesome picture. Look at you guys. I’m in love with the cuteness of you two.”
“It was a great night. I probably should have made a move on him that night. It was prom night that’s what people are supposed to do. Hook-up.”
Tessa hides her face in the pillow and lets out a frustrated groan. Oh no, do I ask or leave it alone? It’s way too boring not to ask. “What? What did you do on prom night? Are you not the innocent girl I think?”
She sits up and her face is bright red. “I never talk about this because it is so embarrassing. But I thought the same thing about prom night. Ya know it’s what ‘people are supposed to do.’ Normal people, not freak shows like me. I turned such a great night into a total disaster.”
“What did you do?” I’m dying of curiosity. I need to know. “Come on tell me. What happened? You got drunk and gave him head in the limo?”
“Ew, ‘head,’ you’re disgusting. It was like our second date. And I was going to just.” She covers her face with one hand and makes a lewd motioning gesture with the other one. “That’s all, but I completely chickened out before I did it. Sort of.”
My chest actually feels pain needing to know more of this story. “What do you mean sort of?”
Tessa looks in the direction of the campers to make sure they can’t hear us. They can’t. She takes a breath and says it real fast, “I took it out, touched it, changed my mind and ran out of the car. There. Happy?”
I look at her. She’s dying of embarrassment and yet the air in my nose from holding in my laugh is unable to hold back. Laughter explodes out from my mouth, my nose. I’m laughing so hard I think some actually comes out of my ears. “Tessa…no. I can’t… I can’t even. I’m sorry. I know it’s not funny.” But I say all this through hysterical laughter, tears from the laughter streaming down my face.
“Go ahead laugh, I know it’s funny. Well, not to me or him. We went on like one more date after that and he was really sweet about it. He bought me a rose, but yeah, we were pretty much over at that point.”
My laughter calms down. “Aw, a rose, that’s sweet. So I’m guessing you didn’t go with that guy Josh I’ve heard you mention.”
“No, I definitely didn’t.” She sticks her tongue out and shudders. “How come you called Tucker fat?”
“What?” I pull my head back and throw up my hands at the random question and subject change. “Where did that come from?”
“It just bothers me because he’s not.”
“Alright, I guess fat wasn’t really the right word. He’s big?” I correct. Is big a more acceptable word? I mean I guess Tucker’s cute in a way, but he’s nowhere near being as hot as Mark.
“Yeah, I guess next to Mark. And Sawyer for that matter too. I think you just prefer string bean boys and I prefer a man,” Tessa says with a hint of attitude.
“You prefer Tucker? Does that mean you like him? ’Cause I thought you didn’t.” I ignore the attitude. The string bean comment was funny.
“I don’t, that doesn’t mean I can’t say he’s good looking. Physically, he’s the type I’m looking for.” Tessa hands me back the picture.
One more glance down at the prom picture before putting it back in its hiding spot. “Okay and my type is a string bean,” I laugh.
“You probably would have liked Kent. He’s a string bean.”
“Who’s Kent?”
“Kent’s the guy I went to prom with.”
I think it’s because we’ve been cooped up too long in these mildew infested cabins. I can’t resist the urge to say, “Oh, Mr. Touch ’N Go.”
“I hate you.” She closes her eyes and shoves me back on the bed. “Anyway back to you. Your type is a tanned string bean with dark hair and blue eyes. I mean you have to admit, Mark and Sawyer look a lot alike.”
“Yeah, they do.” I admit it. The only reason I was attracted to Sawyer was because he looks like Mark. “You know what would be funny, if one day they discovered that Mark’s mom lived in England and Sawyer’s dad lived in California and they were actually twins.”
It’s Tessa’s turn to laugh. “Like The Parent Trap.” She squeals out between belly laughs. “Ahhhh, that is so funny!” More laughter roars from her.
It is funny. When Mark said it to me, I didn’t laugh. I used the word hate because I was mad and jealous he kissed Tessa. Hiding my real feelings behind a nasty remark, no wonder I chased him away. I know the real way I feel about Mark, but he’s going away. I can’t change that. And he may not be in love with me, but he did try and kiss me before we came here, so there must be something there. These next few weeks are all I have left to see him. Missing him so much over these last few weeks makes me realize, I was right in wanting a summer fling.
Alright, I finally know my plan.
If I can…I’m gonna make Mark my summer fling. Then let him go.
PART TWO
CHAPTER ONE
Dear Ashley,
My name is Tucker Sharpe. I am a counselor at Camp Briar Lake. This summer I have had the privilege of meeting a friend of yours, Tessa Jameson.
She’s mentioned you a few times and I hope you don’t mind I looked you up online and contacted you.
I like Tessa. I think I might have made some mistakes, and I could really use some help on how to correct a few things. I’d be thankful for any advice you have for me.
If we could keep this just between us it would be appreciated.
Thank you,
Tucker Sharpe
Tucker,
Here’s some advice… STAY AWAY FROM MY FRIEND!
Ashley
Dear Ashley,
Looks like Tessa might have mentioned me. I know she probably told you I’m just like Josh and maybe I was. But your friend has changed the way I feel towards a lot of things. I just want a chance to see what could happen between us. See if we can build from these feelings we’re already feeling for each other. I’ve never experienced feelings for someone like this before. I know there’s no guarantees, but isn’t that the normal relationship she’s looking for? Seeing what’s there, taking our time, hoping for the best?
Regards,
Tucker Sharpe
Tucker,
Just because you’re saying the right things doesn’t mean I can trust you.
I shouldn’t be doing this BUT, I will give you a tip. Tessa’s birthday is tomorrow. Knowing her, she didn’t tell anyone there. It might be nice if you surprised her.
Here are some of her favorite things. She loves baby’s breath, nothing else just a big bouquet of baby’s breath. Any good florist should have these available. She also loves two in one shampoo and conditioners, nothing fancy. You can get it at any drug store. And this one is probably impossible, but if you can get a cake with a black horse on it, I know she would be thrilled. Tessa loves horses.
Please don’t mention to anyone I told you any of this.
Good Luck.
Ashley
Mark
Thanks to Tucker I have the excuse I’ve needed to see Cassie. I’ve wanted to talk with her since the night everything blew up between us. The confusion of it all kept me away. Where could we even begin now? Was it because she was drunk or did she really mean the things she said. If she could have just calmed down and waited until the morning maybe we could have talked, worked it out. But she lost it, and ended up in the hut with Sawyer. Fuckin’ Sawyer. Still makes me sick just thinking about it.
Thankfully, Sawyer still believes Cassie is my sister and spared me any of the details. A single detail from Sawyer and I know I would have punched him. I’m not quite sure how I haven’t so far.
During an afternoon softball game with the guys, Tucker asked if anyone knows of a bakery close by. He’s in need of something special, specific and quick. Without missing a beat I jumped on the opportunity to help him out.
As I approach her cabin I still have no idea what I’m even going to say when I see her. I’m not even sure of what I feel for her anymore.
Cassie had been easy to fall for. Smart, funny and gorgeous with that tom boy attitude. A bunch of guys had asked her out, I was just the lucky one she said yes to. She agreed to go out with me and I couldn’t believe how perfect she was on our first date.
I had a crush on her from the very start. A crush that went nowhere. She’d made sure of that every chance she got.
Too nervous at first to make a move, I waited too long and we quickly landed in the friend zone. I definitely wanted more, but she made it painfully clear she didn’t, time and again. Every time we shared a moment that gave me hope, she’d shut it down quick, snapping into a little fit of anger. At times, she could be flat out mean.
This summer she wanted freedom and I gave it to her, taking advantage of the freedom myself. Now, she decides, after all this time, she feels something for me. That she loves me. I find it hard to believe.
My palms start to sweat once I knock on the door. I rub them down the front of my tan shorts. The last time I saw Cassie, she was walking hand in hand with Sawyer, glancing back over her shoulder at me, walking towards that damn hut. It’s a brutal image burned into my mind. My heart thumps, anxious, waiting to see what her reaction to me will be. Will she slam the door in my face?
The door opens and I see Cassie. A different Cassie. I struggle to find my voice. Her hair is lighter, streaks of blonde cascade through the dark brown. She nervously tucks a strand of the new hair behind her ear, shifting her feet nervously.
“I need a favor,” I blurt out. Lousy way to start off a conversation, I blame the hair.
“Okay. What do you need?”
Her quick response takes me off guard. Cassie’s more a favor asker, than a favor do-er.
“A friend of mine needs a cake for tomorrow afternoon. I was wandering if you’d be able to make one. I’d be willing to help you if you wanted.” Where did that come from? I offered to help her?
“What kind of cake? Who’s it for?”
“A birthday cake with a black horse on it. I know odd request. And, uh, he asked me not to say who he was. He wants it to be a surprise.” I breathe in a new sweetness. What is that incredible scent coming from her? Peaches?
“Alright.” She crinkles her nose and swishes her mouth side to side. “Can you bring me to the store to get what I need?”
“Yeah, I’d be happy to. We can go right now if you want.” Relax dude, why am I reacting this way? A year of crushing on her and I never acted like this before.
“Okay. Let’s go.”
I extend my hand for Cassie to go ahead of me. “Ladies first,” I say in a goofy voice and she gives me a funny look. Why did I say that? I need to stop. I’m making a fool of myself.
The sun bounces off the lake, setting behind it. Both of us start to talk at the same time.
“Go ahead,” I smile.
“I was just going to ask if you’ve been fishing.”
“Not really. A few times that’s it.”
“How is it up here? Any better than back home?”
“No, it was much better back home. Things here just aren’t the same.”
“No, definitely not,” she agrees. We share a moment of uncomfortable eye contact knowing we’re talking about a lot more than fishing.
A few people wave to us a
s we walk by. Brianne runs over holding up her hands, stopping us from continuing. “I never get to see you guys together. Stand next to each other. I want to see if you guys look alike.”
“No,” I know we are both uneasy with this request. “We’re in a big rush. Next time.”
“Oh, you’re going somewhere?” she asks, interested. “Will you be gone a long time?”
“Yeah, a long time.”
“Both of you?”
“Yes, bye.” I usher Cassie forward so we can get away from her. God, we should have come clean with everyone about the brother sister scam. But how can you even explain it at this point without looking like complete idiots.
The conversation I’m hoping to have on the car ride never happens. Every topic I think about bringing up seems stupid. Should we talk about what happened and get it over with?
“We’re completely out of whack, aren’t we?” I chuckle nervously. “It’s not like us to have nothing to talk about.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I think I screwed everything up with us.” She looks out the window.
This isn’t the Cassie I’m used to. The Cassie I know would have blamed me and gotten me to make it up to her by taking her out to eat or for ice cream.
“Last time I saw you, you said you wanted to show me something. You said you had something for me, but I never got to see what it was.”
“Oh, it was something stupid.” She tries to hide a smile.
“What was it? Tell me. We need something to talk about.”
“It was a Pez dispenser. Remember when I gave you all the Pez dispenser’s for your birthday.”
“Yes, I still have them in my room at home,” I laugh. “Excellent gift, I loved it.”
“No, it wasn’t.” Cassie shakes her head sadly. “It was an awful gift. It was thoughtless and I’m embarrassed. You gave me a beautiful music box and I gave you crap.”
For Cassie’s eighteenth birthday I searched all over until I found the perfect gift. I couldn’t wait to see her face when she opened the cupcake music box I’d found. Her eyes filled with tears as she removed it carefully from the box, making it worth all of the effort I put into finding it.
Wait (The Fast Series) Page 11
