Suicide Mission (Guarded Secrets Series Book 1)

by Sara Schoen

  “It was an accident, anyone could have been there. I guess he had decided not to sit up front in the truck and stay with his shipment.”

  Without warning I saw Tessa lunge for him, throwing a few punches, but not causing much damage. She was quickly pulled back by one of the men that had been standing next to me, and he held her in place. She was struggling against his hold, and letting the tears fall silently from her eyes. I could see the anger in them, but the tears only made Jax laugh more.

  “That's not an accident! You killed him, Jax, you killed him. No one and nothing else!” Tessa cried out as tears streamed down her cheeks. The other man stepped forward slightly, ready to be at her side to prevent her from attempting to escape, but staying close to me in case I tried to run again. He was going to have a tough choice if we decided to break for it at the same time, but something told me I would be the main target. I wouldn’t be allowed to leave, except in a body bag.

  I subconsciously took a step back as Jax spoke again, “We have to clean up every mess before we move so there's no chance of someone ratting us out. Marco ordered it, telling us the boss wants it handled. It's just business, Tessa, you understand.”

  “Sure I do, Jax,” she scoffed.

  I could see the pain in her eyes, because she did understand. She had probably seen it happen before. She just never thought that it would happen to her, and now she had to face the horror of what it was like to be in a cartel. That once you’re in, there’s no way out except through death. “Just got to go along with it, I guess. That’s how this always worked, you lied to us and we believed it because the truth was too painful to think about. Yeah, I completely understand.”

  Jax smiled, pleased with her answer, and raised his gun to Tessa's head, “I am truly sorry, Tessa. It's a pity that we have to do it like this.”

  “You’re not sorry, Jax, you never were,” she said as she shut her eyes. She was going to give up her life, she wasn’t even going to fight for it. She had lost her father to this man and the cartel, yet here she was, still brainwashed that they cared for her and that it was the best for the cartel.

  I had an opening, everyone was so focused on her that if I tried, I could make it to the far door. I would have to pray that no one would notice until I was close enough to escape, or I’d get a bullet in the back. With ginger steps, I made my way around the commotion and proceeded toward the door, but the closer I got the more I realized I couldn’t do it. I looked back at Tessa, the girl that not fifteen minutes ago was pointing the gun at me. I saw the defeat in her posture, the sorrow in her tears and knew the pain she was feeling of losing a family. I gripped my hands into tight balls, forcing myself to continue toward the door. My nails dug into my skin as I tried to stop myself, but something in me just wouldn't let me stand by. I fought with it for a few more seconds, but I knew I couldn’t leave her. It wasn’t right, it wasn’t what I was about as an agent. I sprang toward her, in between her and Jax, just before the gun went off with a loud bang.

  Chapter 23

  I had acted at the last second to grab Jax's gun and forced it up into the air, causing him to miss the kill shot on Tessa and hit the roof far above us. Jax and I were struggling for control of the weapon, his hand wrapped around the handle and mine dangerously close to being shot off. I heard the other two men react to my movements, there was an audible clank of metal as they drew their weapons, surely pointing them at me. Tessa must have reacted at that point, because suddenly there was cries of pain echoing around us as Jax and I crashed to the ground in a fight. He struggled to prevent me from taking the gun from him causing a few stray shots to go off. I heard a few hit the walls and one of the men cry out from being shot. There was a clanking on the ground when he fell and rapid footsteps as someone started to scramble.

  Jax threw his arm back and let it go to punch me in the face. I cried out, but latched my free hand onto the arm that had caused the blow. I sank my teeth into his skin, causing a few more stray shots to fire off as I bit into Jax and attempted to force him to release the weapon, but instead he began to hit me with the butt of the gun. The metal pounded against my skull, and I sank my teeth in deeper while I tried to get my other hand to the knife I had on the waist of my jeans. I heard Tessa let out a tortured scream that caused me to look toward her, the man that hadn't collapsed to the ground was racing toward her. I had to help her, because she wouldn’t have it in her to kill the people she saw as family.

  I released my knife from the sheath it was held in, and raked it across Jax’s shirt, cutting it and his skin to shreds. Jax clenched his teeth. I went for the gun, but before I could grab it he tossed it away from me, but he didn’t have it and now we had a chance. I ordered Tessa to retrieve the gun, releasing Jax from my bite, which had drawn blood. Tessa scrambled for the gun, crying as she did so. I heard the metal move on the ground as Tessa fumbled to pick it up and Jax and I continued to struggle until he managed to pin me to the ground, my knife still tight in my hand.

  “If you move, I will kill you,” Tessa threatened. I glanced up to see her standing, shaking more like it, pointing the gun at Jax. He let out a laugh, and I couldn’t blame him. Even I couldn't believe it because her voice was shaking as well as her hands while she held the gun.

  “Now, Tessa,” Jax said cautiously. “Put the gun down and we can all walk away from this unharmed. You are family after all, we can work this out in a different way and just move on.”

  I looked over Tessa’s face, the confusion etched deeply in her features. She was clearly having a difficult time deciding what to do. No matter what, she saw these people as family and wanted them to accept her.

  “Your loyalty to our family hasn't gone unnoticed. If you put down the gun, I'm sure we could work this out.”

  There was inner conflict in her face as she started to lower the gun the more he talked.

  “He's lying, Tessa,” I cried, breaking her out of the mental debate she was having with herself. “You know he is lying! He's just telling you what you want to hear.”

  Jax tried to silence me by bending his arm and placing his forearm on my throat, cutting off my airway. Once I was quiet, he continued to try to talk Tessa down from shooting him or anyone else she once saw as family. There wasn't any doubt that Tessa wanted to accept what they were saying, but knew that they weren't telling the whole truth.

  “He's the one who killed your father!” I choked out, successfully earning myself a direct punch to my cheek, but also snapping Tessa out of her inner conflict.

  There was a moment of hesitation as Jax waited to see if Tessa would drop the gun, and while he looked away from me, I forced my knee up and straight to his groin. I heard the groan and felt his breath leave his lungs as he collapsed next to me. I heard footsteps, but they quickly stopped. Tessa must have been holding the weapon at Jax's partner now.

  “He killed your father, Tessa, and he is going to kill you. You have to kill him before he kills you and you know it. These people aren’t family,” I asserted, carefully watching the two men that were slowly inching their way toward us.

  “And what are you exactly?” she questioned, pointing the gun at me again.

  “I’m the one who’s getting out of here alive,” I said, hoping she would realize I was trying to help so that we could live. “I could’ve escaped while they were preoccupied with you, but I came back. What’s shooting me going to do? They will just kill you anyway!”

  Tessa didn’t lower the gun, quite the opposite actually. She raised it to my head and took the shot. I braced myself for the impact, but nothing came.

  I heard a cry behind me and turned to see that Tessa had shot Jax in the shoulder. He let a hiss escape through his gritted teeth, but when he didn't fall over she shot him again in the same spot. He let out a cry of pain and fell back onto the ground. I saw the men behind me look shocked, before anger crossed their faces and they started to come toward us. I darted to her side as she shifted the gun to Jax's partners. Jax was out, but thes
e men had smiles that told me they were confident that she wouldn't shoot again.

  I leapt forward, and ducked the punches that the man threw at me. I landed a hard one in his stomach, then landed a kick in his side that sent him to the ground. I dove toward my knife as the other man quickly jumped in to help his friend. The blade found its way to my hand as if it was Thor’s hammer coming back to its true owner. The man dove toward me, forcing me to jump over him and grab the low hanging light that provided very little possibilities. I swung momentarily before jumping off and landing on his back.

  “Now it’s your turn to say good-bye,” I said as I stuffed the knife into his neck. He crumbled to the ground, with me on him and sent us both to the cold hard concrete. I saw his friend start to move toward me, and without hesitation I ran to Tessa and ripped the gun from her hands. She didn’t even blink as I shot him in the chest without any remorse. They had all planned to kill me, killed my friends, and civilians. There was no way I was going to feel bad for taking at least one of them off the map, but I did wonder how the agency looked at killing in the field. They didn’t like abduction, I’m sure they wouldn’t like hearing I had killed someone…especially Demon.

  I retrieved my knife from the guy’s throat and looked over Tessa to see her wrist bleeding profusely; she looked like she was about to buckle over due to the pain. We were blocked in with no way out, and I wouldn't be able to make it out without her. I felt a smile curve onto my lips as I grabbed her uninjured wrist as I pulled her out of the room.

  “You can't get out this way!” Tessa cried as I led her to the door that previously had people shooting at me.

  “I couldn't before, but what they don't know is that now you're on my side,” I said as I pushed open the door and held Tessa against me as a shield while holding the gun to her head. She let out a cry, whether from the fact that she had been shot and it hurt or she was worried I would shoot her now I wasn't sure. To those around us it looked like I had a hostage, and if I learned anything about this group they don't harm who they consider family, unless ordered to so. That meant that this would only work for a short period of time. “Act scared and tell them to stay back or I will shoot,” I whispered into her ear, craning my neck to reach her tall frame.

  “It won't work, we are both as good as dead!” she whispered back.

  “You heard those guys, they didn't tell anyone else that they had to kill you, and they can't kill you themselves in front of other members or it looks bad. With your help, we can make it out of this alive and go our separate ways. You just have to work with me for a moment.” I felt Tessa tense as she debated on what to do, I would have to force her to see the situation my way. I started to move out from the protection of the door, causing the people outside to lift their guns at us. “Say it.”

  “Don't shoot!” she cried as I pushed the gun lightly into her head. “Stay back or she'll start shooting.” The guns didn't lower, but no one shot as I slowly forced Tessa around the building. When we were out of sight I let her go, but another person's voice joined our escape.

  “Where are they?” Jax called out, there was a pause as someone answered that we couldn't. Tessa reacted before I did, she grabbed my wrist and pulled me through the compound just as Jax ordered them for us both to be shot dead if necessary. She pulled me past building after building, getting closer to the fence I had come under. I was about to tell her we could make a run for it since I had friends on the outside, but there were footsteps racing toward us. I didn't know which way to turn or go, but luckily Tessa had an idea and pulled me into a different warehouse.

  She led me through the building, doorway after doorway and hallway after hallway until we found a large room filled with boxes. As she pulled me into the room, I figured out why she picked this. It was deep inside the building, anyone that followed us would have been lost, there were two separate exits and we could lay low until the people following us were looking in a different place so we could keep moving.

  I was about to make my move when I glanced at Tessa's wrist. She was trying to put pressure on the bleeding, but it wasn't helping. The blood was pouring through her wound and she couldn't stop it. We had to work together to make it out of here alive, and if she died I would too because I would get lost since Raider and Spit Fire weren't coming. Tessa could pass out from blood loss if it continued to bleed as it was. My own escape would have to wait, or I'd be carrying dead weight.

  “Come here,” I said as I gestured for her to come closer to me. I picked at the ripped part of my shirt, that I must have done while running away from her earlier, until I tore the scrap from my sleeve and pulled it off. She looked at me curiously as I kneeled down beside her and inspected her wound. It looked like she had a through and through wound, which meant I didn't have to worry about bullet fragments being in her wrist, but that would have to be looked at. Demon would be able to get her to a hospital without a problem, I just had to figure out how to get her to him.

  “You shot Heath in the chest,” she said breaking the silence and my thought process. “You probably killed him. You stabbed Marshall, he wasn’t breathing.”

  “Better him than us,” I said, but when I saw her distressed expression I felt bad for killing someone she thought was family. “I was trying to hit his shoulder. I've shot a gun before, but I aimed incorrectly. It looked so much easier on television than it actually is,” I said with a smile hoping to ease the tension.

  “How's my wrist?” she asked as I knotted the material of my shirt onto her wrist. I tied it as tight as I could since I was only going to have enough for once around her wrist. I just hoped that it would stop, or at least slow the bleeding so we could make it out of here without any more close calls.

  “It's a through and through, so it will heal well since there won't be fragments stuck in it. You'll need stitches probably, and that's not something I can give you unfortunately, but you can once we escape.”

  “If we escape,” Tessa added sourly as she looked around our surroundings. The boxes were almost ceiling high, but there were only two rows of them and a few were on the ground as if they were being moved around. For now we had shelter, and that's more than I would have gotten on my own. So I was thankful for her assistance, even though she didn't want to work with me, in keeping me alive.

  “We can,” I said, trying to keep calm. “You just have to help me!”

  “Why would I help you? You ruined this for me. It’s your fault that I’m even in this mess!”

  I felt my eye twitch in annoyance. She still wasn't seeing this the way she should and I was sick and tired of hearing her “this is my family” argument. “I'm not in the mood to hear any more of your illogical ramblings, so either let me finish what I can do for this and shut up or keep talking and I will shoot you in chest without a second thought,” the cold words even sent a shiver up my spine.

  Tessa fell silent for a few moments, allowing me to focus on her wound, but when I was about to start thinking of how to get out of here she spoke again. “So how did you get recruited into this?”

  I glared at Tessa, thinking about how to answer to get her to be quiet. The truth always seemed to make people stop talking whenever I came around, so it was worth a shot. “I had nothing to live for outside of the agency. You lost your father, I lost my whole family in one day. I lost friends, gained a new family, learned who really cared about me, but I lost the will to live, and this gave me a chance to want to survive again.” With that explanation, Tessa shut up for the remainder of the time I worked on dressing her wound and I didn't hear another word until I broke the silence.

  Chapter 24

  There was constant movement outside of our hiding spot. It worried me so I pulled Tessa deeper into the corridors of boxes. I found a small area where the boxes had been stacked to create a small cubicle that we could hide in and not worry about being seen if someone was just scanning through the room. I was about to pull her into the hiding spot, careful of her injured arm, but she refused.r />
  “What were you even looking for in that office? I want to know right now,” Tessa said forcefully as she pulled her uninjured arm out of my hold.

  I turned on a dime to stare at her as if she was insane. We were being chased, by people she classified as family, but who were trying to kill her, and she couldn't stop asking about what I was looking for in the office. We could be shot dead at any moment, and she was still stuck on why I was here in the first place. Why did it matter at this point? We just had to work together long enough so that we could make it out alive, and nothing more than that.

  “Why does it matter right now? Is that seriously the most important thing on your mind right now, because my mind is on the fact that there are people that want to kill us,” I said as I gestured toward the general direction of where one of the men was going to come from if we didn't lay low. “I would like to get out of here alive, and if you don't want to then just tell me how to leave so that—”

  “You think I want to stay?” she yelled, completely interrupting me.

  “If you keep stopping, and debating with yourself that these people are your family and all care about you then I would say that you want to die! You're asking for them to kill you because that's what's going to happen if we stay here too long or don't find somewhere to hide. Some thug is going to walk through that door and blow us open with bullets. Please decide now if you're with or against me, so that I can leave if you want to die.”

  “I don't want to die! It's your fault that I'm in this mess,” Tessa yelled, repeating her statement from earlier. Clearly she wanted to have this debate before she died, but I didn't want to die with her. She couldn’t wrap her head around anything that was going on and that was causing her to get stuck, meanwhile I wanted to plan so that we could get out of here alive and I’d never have to hear her complain again.

  “How is it my fault?”