Think Again

by Isabel Lucero

  “Fuck!” he barks, running a hand through his hair. “Look, Aria,” he says, grabbing my hands in his. “We can work this out. I won’t have anything to do with her or the baby. I don’t even want kids. You know that. And Carmen is a whack job. I need you.”

  I snatch my hands away from him. “You disgust me,” I snarl. “You’re a lying, cheating bastard, and that’s bad enough, but you’re actually saying you don’t want anything to do with your kid? You made that baby, Aaron. That’s your responsibility. What would you have done if I had gotten pregnant, huh?” I shake my head as I walk past him. “I want a divorce. I’ll have the papers ready this week, and you will sign them.”

  “You can’t leave me, Aria! We’re going to work this out, and you know it. You’ve been with me too long, you don’t know anything else. You know your home is with me. You won’t make it by yourself.”

  I come to a halt and snap back around. “Excuse me? You will fucking sign those papers, Aaron. I have so much shit on you, and I will not hesitate to tell everyone. I already made a call to your parents today. Good luck with that conversation.”

  “What did you tell them?” he says through gritted teeth.

  “That you have some wonderful news to tell them, of course. About them being grandparents. They’ll be so excited.”

  “Aria,” he growls.

  “If you don’t tell them. I will. I’ll tell them everything. So, you can spin it your way, or you can have me tell them all the dirty details,” I say as I walk to the door that leads to the garage.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Wherever the fuck I want. I found a place to live, Aaron. I don’t need you. My home is wherever I am. Don’t ever fucking think I was dependent on you.”

  “You what?” he roars.

  “Oh, and since tonight seems to be the night that we’re getting everything on the table, I guess I should tell you something. It may help you in your decision about this divorce.”

  “What?” he asks wearily.

  “I slept with Chris, and it was the most amazing sex I’ve ever had.”

  I smile before I slam the door behind me and get into my car. It’s already loaded with everything that I could fit into it. Right as I’m backing out, the door swings open and Aaron stands there looking furious. I give him a little wave before I close the garage door.

  “I still can’t believe it!” Janna exclaims, pulling two coffee mugs from her cabinet. “I knew he was an asshole, but Jesus fucking Christ, I didn’t think he was that much of an asshole.” She pours the coffee into the ceramic mugs. “But I’m fucking proud of you for saying what you said!” She laughs, almost spilling the coffee on the counter.

  I came to her apartment last night when I left my house, cat be damned. She vacuumed, dusted, and put the cat in the other room while I was armed with Benadryl, just in case.

  “He deserved it,” I say with a shrug. “Men and their egos. I hurt him more with my parting statement than anything else I could’ve said.”

  She shakes her head while handing me the coffee, and rests her hip on the counter as I sit on a bar stool on the other side. “A baby?”

  I join her and shake my head as well, unable to believe it myself. “And Carmen? I never thought she’d do this to me.”

  “What a cunt.” I almost spit out my coffee. “What?” Janna asks with wide eyes. “She is. Carmen the Cunt.”

  “I need to figure out how I want to approach her with this. She can’t get off easy.”

  “What all did you plan for Aaron, again?” she asks, mischief in her eyes. She probably remembers, but she wants to hear it again.

  “Well, I went and got some balloons and invitations specially made. They’ll be sent to his office, and he’ll have a good time explaining everything to his co-workers. Nothing that will get him fired, but enough to embarrass him. So, some of the balloons say Congrats on your divorce! And the others say Congrats on the baby! The invites that his co-workers will get say, It’s official! I’m getting divorced. But I don’t have time to party, because I’m having a baby! Save the date and join me and Stephany for a baby shower. I didn’t put a date or the address, because I don’t expect that to really happen, but his dirty laundry is out there, and I don’t give one fuck about it.”

  Janna cracks up. “It’s brilliant. They’re gonna be like, who the fuck is Stephany?”

  “He’s lucky I didn’t tell his parents, but he’ll have to come clean to them eventually. No hiding a baby.”

  “Oh!” Jan exclaims, clapping her hands together. “Do you think we could get balloons made that say Cunty Carmen? Or Carmen the Cunt on them?”

  I snort. “I’m not sure.”

  “We should totally try and send those to her.”

  “I don’t know. I think I’m just going to show up to her house and tell her that I know. I’ll figure out what to say when I’m there.”

  “Do you think Aaron’s told her yet?”

  “I don’t know. He’s been blowing up my phone since I left, but I haven’t heard from her.”

  “She’d be too scared to call.”

  “Which is why I’m just going to show up.”

  “What did Chris have to say about all this?”

  “Well, I didn’t tell him a whole lot. I just told him that we had a huge fight, and a lot of stuff came out, and that I’d talk to him later. He offered for me to stay with him, but I just couldn’t go over there right away, you know? It would be weird to have this big blowout with Aaron, then go cry to Chris about it. That’s what you’re for,” I say with a lopsided smile.

  “That’s right,” she replies with a single nod.

  “You know,” I begin, “I know I cheated on Aaron with Chris, so maybe I don’t have the right to be mad at Aaron for what he did . . .”

  “Fuck that!” Jan shouts, cutting me off. “Yes the fuck you do. He’s been cheating on you for a long time. Who knows if he ever even stopped after the first time? Not only that, but he screwed one of your best friends and got some chick knocked up. He has secret accounts and hotel rooms. Of course you can be pissed! You slept with Chris knowing you were on your way to Divorceville.”

  I crack a smile, loving that she has my back. “I know, and I could’ve cheated on him before if I wanted to. There have been guys who’ve hit on me, and I knew then that if I wanted to, I could’ve had a no-strings-attached booty call. But I never did. It was Chris. He’s different. I actually like him. I don’t think Aaron really likes any of the girls he’s been with. He just does it because he can. Because he’s a man who clearly needs his ego stroked by proving to himself that he can sleep with whoever he wants. He has insecurity issues.”

  She nods, agreeing with me. “It’s a good thing you got that condo already.”

  “I know.” My phone rings again, and I walk to the living room to get it from the table. “Aaron,” I say, holding it up.

  “You gonna answer it?”

  “I will. Eventually.”

  “So, Scott let you have today off?”

  “Yeah, he’s such a good guy. I told him a little bit about what was going on, and he understood. Everybody else is scheduled to work today, so they won’t be too shorthanded. I’ll go back tomorrow.”

  “Well, I have to get to work, but feel free to make yourself at home.”

  “Thank, Jan. I appreciate it. I’ll probably just call Aaron, then go by and deal with Carmen, and after that, who knows.”

  She comes over and hugs me. “Call me if you need me.”

  “I will. Have a good day.”

  “You too. Good luck.”

  Once she’s gone, I grab my phone and call Aaron while I pace back and forth between the kitchen and living room.

  “Finally” he growls into the phone.

  “What do you want, Aaron?” I ask, feeling nervous for some reason.

  “What do I want?” he spits. “I want some fucking answers!”

  “Answers about what?”

  “You and that fu
cking doctor! I knew it. I knew you were sleeping with him. Did you fuck him in my house?” His angry voice is loud in my ear.

  “First of all, that just happened two days ago, and that was the only time. Maybe I should ask you the same question, though. Did you fuck any of those girls in my house? Huh? While I was at work, maybe?”

  He scoffs. “Please.”

  “Oh, right. You paid for hotel rooms, because you’re such a classy guy.”

  “Don’t start with me, Aria. I’m beyond pissed off.”

  “Oh, really? And I’m not? I know what I did was wrong, but you’ve been doing me wrong for a long time now, and you know it.”

  “What the hell were you thinking sending that shit to my office?” he barks, bypassing my statement.

  “You deserve worse, so be grateful I didn’t burn the fucking house down. I could’ve done so much more. Think about your parents receiving those same little gifts.”

  “You better not.”

  “Don’t make me.”

  “Do you know how embarrassing that was? For me to have to explain to my colleagues what’s going on?”

  “I don’t really give a shit. We’re getting a divorce, Aaron. There’s no way around it.”

  “We’re not getting a divorce,” he murmurs.

  “Excuse me? Yes, we are! You still want to be married even though you’re having a baby with someone else, and knowing I cheated on you too?”

  He huffs. “We’re not getting a divorce.”

  “What is with you? We’re clearly not happy anymore. This is never going to work.”

  “Look,” he says. “Let’s make a deal.”

  “Aaron,” I say with frustration. “I’m not making a deal with you.”

  “Just wait until you hear what it is. You know my grandparents are rich, right?”

  “Oh my god. Are you trying to bribe me?”

  “Just listen!” he snaps. “I get an inheritance when they die, but if I’m not married, I get significantly less. If you stay married to me, you’ll get some of that money. We can divorce once they pass.”

  The shock of his statement sits heavy in my stomach. I can only stare out the window, wondering if I heard what I thought I just did.

  “You . . . you’re only married to me so you can get money?”

  “It’s not like that,” he says, sounding annoyed.

  “I think it is like that. You want us to stay together until they die? How fucked up is that? You only care about money! You never cared about us. You probably don’t even care about them.”

  “I do care about them! I love them. But this is a lot of money, Aria. It’s not like I only married you because of that. I married you because I loved you.”

  “But over time you wanted more. You wanted to be single, but you knew that you couldn’t be because you were waiting on your grandparents to die.”

  He sighs loudly. “It would only be for a few years at the most.”

  “Are you kidding me?” I ask, disgusted by his behavior. “I don’t even know who you are anymore. You’re a sneaky, greedy, deceitful, despicable asshole. I’m not staying married to you, and I’m going to tell your parents about this. We’ll see if they appreciate you acting this way.”

  “Don’t do it, Aria,” he demands. “You’ll regret it.”

  “Is that a threat?” I question. “I need to make sure I have everything straight before I go to the lawyer’s office, and possibly the cops if you’re threatening me.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous.”

  “I’ll have the divorce papers ready soon and sent to your office. Sign them and send them back to me. If I don’t get them back within a few days of you receiving them, I’ll go to your parents and grandparents with all the information I have.”

  “Goddammit, Aria!”

  “Good-bye, Aaron.”

  I park a couple houses down from Carmen’s place, knowing that if she were to see my car, she might not open the door for me. I’m not even sure if she’s aware of the fact that I know about her and Aaron or not. I’m kind of hoping she doesn’t.

  I ring the bell and step to the side so she can’t see me through the peephole. The door opens, and I make eye contact with the woman who slept with my husband—someone I once called my friend.

  She looks a little surprised to see me, but that’s because I never show up unannounced. The surprised look on her face disappears and is quickly replaced by a forced smile.

  “Hey, Aria.”

  She doesn’t know.

  She has hair so dark brown that it almost looks black, and eyes that match. Her nose is a little wide, but not nearly as wide as her smile. Her Mexican heritage gives her a beautiful sun-kissed skin tone, and she’s shorter than me, standing at five-foot-one.

  “Hey.”

  “What’re you doing here?” she asks with a nervous giggle.

  “I just wanted to come by and talk to you real quick.”

  “Oh. Uh. Do you want to come in?” she asks, stepping back.

  “No. I won’t be here long.”

  She begins to look nervous, fidgeting with her hair and shifting from one foot to the other.

  “Okay.”

  “I just want you to know that I know about you and Aaron. I’m beyond hurt that you’d do this to me, because I thought we had a really good friendship. I know now that you’re just a selfish . . . cunt,” I say, using Jan’s word. “He doesn’t want you, Carm. He said you were a clingy whack job. He’s an asshole who probably slept his way around town, and you’re just one of his conquests. He got someone else pregnant, and he doesn’t even give a shit about her. So, not only did you lose me and Jan as friends, you lost what you thought was going to be someone you could have a relationship with if I ended it with him. Turns out, I’m getting what I want, anyway, and you get nothing.”

  I turn to walk away and she calls out to me.

  “Aria, wait! I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

  “There’s nothing for you to say. Your actions said it all. Good-bye.”

  I quickly make my way to my car and head to the attorney’s office. I had already been researching them, so I know right where to go.

  Time moves impossibly fast, but I’m grateful. After leaving the lawyer’s office on Monday, I went back to my house and grabbed a few more things while Aaron was at work. I ended up staying with Janna until my condo was ready, because it didn’t seem right to stay with Chris for an extended amount of time.

  Aaron and I ended up agreeing on filing for a dissolution of marriage. With our own attorneys, we wrote down what we each wanted to get out of this, made some compromises, and that was that. It’s not officially over yet, since we still have to go to court to get everything on record, but we were able to agree on the division of our money and property.

  Janna and I celebrated, drinking margaritas and taking shots until the wee hours of the morning. Luckily, we stayed at her place, because we both got wasted. I drank. I laughed. I drank some more. I cried. The emotion of everything just hit me like a ton of bricks. Even under the influence, Jan consoled me, she even joined in with the tears, but I think that was just the alcohol talking.

  Carm tried getting in touch with Jan, and after ignoring the first few calls, Jan answered and told her to fuck off. We haven’t heard from her since.

  I’ve seen Chris at work, and even went to his house for dinner a couple of times. Now that it’s Saturday and I can officially move into my condo, I recruit the help of both Chris and Jan, giving them the opportunity to finally meet.

  Jan agrees to take all of my small belongings to the condo, while I work with the movers to get the few pieces of furniture from the house, and a few pieces from a storage unit. Aaron agreed not to be there while I got my stuff from the house, and that gives me a little relief. I know I’ll have to see and talk to him again sometime, but I don’t want to right now.

  The movers get the furniture from the spare bedroom, consisting of a queen size bed, dresser, nightstand, and a forty
-six inch TV, and load it into the truck. I also pack up a box of dishes and snatch a few towels from the linen closet. The only thing I get from the storage unit is a brown couch and loveseat, but that leaves me with the basics, and everything else I don’t mind replacing.

  When we pull up in front of the condo, I see Jan pulling clothes from my car and taking them inside.

  “Hey!” I announce, hopping out of the mover’s truck.

  “Hey. I’m just about done. I hung up all the stuff that had hangers, and everything else is folded and on the bottom of the closet with the shoes for now. All the bathroom stuff is put away, too.”

  “Thank you.”

  I tell the movers where everything goes, and then me and Jan stay outside and out of the way as they take everything in. While we talk, I see Chris’s black Audi approach the house, and I smile.

  Jan turns around. “Ooh, is this him? Dr. Hot Stuff?”

  I roll my eyes. “Please don’t call him that to his face.”

  I watch as he parks along the road and then exits the car. He’s wearing the same Adidas jogging pants that he wore when we went hiking, and long-sleeve T-shirt, the sleeves are dark gray, and the rest is gray heather.

  “Afternoon, ladies,” he greets with a smile. He comes over and kisses my cheek before extending his hand to Janna. “You must be the infamous Janna.”

  She grins. “That I am. You must be Dr. Hot Stuff.”

  He laughs as he glances down at me. “I guess that’s me.”

  I smack my hand on my forehead, embarrassment coloring my cheeks. “For the record, she came up with that name. Not me.”

  “I only came up with it because she said you were really hot.”

  “Janna, go do something,” I say with a laugh.

  “I’m just playing,” she says with a chuckle. “Anyway, it’s nice to meet you, Chris. I wanted to meet the man who’s been able to put a smile on my friend’s face recently.”

  “Well, I’m happy to meet anybody that means a lot to Aria, because she means a lot to me,” he responds, putting his arm around my shoulder. I grin like an idiot, and Jan has the same stupid smile. She’s happy for me. “So, we gonna head in and get things arranged or what?”