The Nasty Vamp

by Gail Koger

  Modred will keep you safe until we arrive.

  A low sibilant hiss sounded behind me and I jumped like a scalded cat. You’re sure about that?

  Aye.

  Glittering red orbs appeared in the darkness.

  “Nice dragon. Please don’t eat me.”

  A sinewy, forked tongue flicked out and slimed my face. “Ewww.”

  Modred likes you.

  As a snack?

  A low thundering, sounding horribly like amused laughter issued from the dragon.

  He finds you amusing.

  Great, I live to entertain. My flashlight caught a great clawed foot and I raised the beam. The dragon was curled up around a half-eaten corpse. A bloody arm dangled from his mouth.

  Fighting back the overwhelming urge to scream like a little girl, I edged away from the needle-sharp teeth. Where’s McGregor?

  He and the crime lord are coming to an arrangement.

  Modred’s half lidded eyes followed my retreat.

  How…How long before you get here?

  A series of violent explosions rocked the castle sending debris raining down on me. “Holy shit, they’re trying to blow the place up!”

  The dragon bellowed and vanished.

  They cannot breach my wards.

  Another explosion shook the walls.

  I dodged a falling stone. You sure about that?

  Stay put, Kane commanded and was gone.

  I pulled out a lock pick and hurried over to the cell door. “Stay put? Not on your life.”

  The door was abruptly thrust open, knocking me on my ass. I gaped up at the black knight filling the doorway. My gaze skittered over the horned helmet before dropping to the big, glowing sword he held in one hand. “Uncle Fester?”

  He raised his face plate. “What? You were expecting King Arthur?”

  I pointed to his sword. “Well, that is Excalibur, isn’t it?”

  He grabbed my arm and jerked me to my feet. “I should have never left you with your mother’s people.”

  “Huh?”

  My uncle dragged me down the gloomy hallway. “Hurry. My illusions won’t fool the dragon for long.”

  “How did you know where I was?”

  He slanted an amused glance over his shoulder. “I am a sorcerer.”

  That he was. My uncle could also pass for Sean Connery in his Bond days, handsome, debonair, and lethal. Very lethal.

  Modred’s furious roar echoed down the hallway.

  “I think he knows I’m gone.”

  “Fuck.” Uncle Fester came to an abrupt halt and I slammed into his back.

  “What?” I peered around his shoulder. A very pissed off dragon blocked the passageway. “He looks smaller.”

  A snort broke from Uncle Fester. “Modred can become as small as a mouse if necessary.”

  I stepped around Uncle Fester. “Hey, Modred, have you met my uncle?”

  A thick, hissing stream of noxious yellow flame shot from his mouth and seared the rock floor in front of me.

  “Guess that’s a yes. Must have been when you stole the Shivait amulet and let me take the fall for it.”

  “You still pissed about that? I gave you the amulet.”

  “Big whoopee do. You high-tailed it out of there and left me to deal with the mess.”

  “If you’d stop blowing up McGregor’s cars, they wouldn’t have been chasing you in the first place. Now would they?”

  Modred bellowed and a tongue of flames shot over my head.

  “Bloody hell,” Uncle Fester snarled, ripping off his flaming helmet.

  I ran a frantic hand over my hair. It was singed. My temper flared to life. “You just had to mess with my hair.”

  With a low rumbling laugh the dragon spat more fire at my hair.

  “If I had a Big Bertha, I’d fry your scaly ass.”

  Modred let out a ferocious roar.

  Uncle Fester grabbed my arm and yanked me behind him. “Don’t provoke the dragon.”

  “My father told that beast to protect me.” I glared at Modred. “You don’t follow orders very well, do you?”

  The beast showed off his very sharp teeth in an evil grin.

  My uncle gave me a puzzled frown. “Your father? What are you talking about?”

  “Kane.”

  “Kane is not your father.”

  “Yeah, he kinda is.”

  My uncle yanked my collar down and examined the clan marks. “Fuck. You’re mated to that leech and after all the trouble I went through to keep him away from you.”

  I snorted. “What trouble was that? All you did was put that freakin’ dog collar on me and disappear.”

  “I had my reasons.”

  I rolled my eyes. “I just bet you did. Was it a blonde in Rio or a brunette in Paris?”

  Uncle Fester shot me an irritated glare but didn’t deny it. “What happened to your Amalfi Medallion?”

  “McGregor removed it when I was shot.”

  “You were shot!?”

  “Yeah, and since Fester the Magnificent was too busy fornicating with every woman in Europe to even check on me it was up to McGregor to save my life.”

  “Out of gratitude you decided to fuck him again?”

  Hurt and furious I spat, “No. I didn’t fuck McGregor until the mating ceremony and do you really think I had a choice? That I had the power to defeat McGregor or Dominic or Kane?”

  “Tessa should have never allowed it to happen.”

  A harsh laugh broke from me. “Aunt Tessa doesn’t give a rat’s ass about me. Why do you think she made me Bambi’s Alfred?”

  Modred crept closer.

  “Get out of here. The dragon won’t hurt me.”

  “I’m not leaving without you.”

  “Then you die,” Kane’s booming voice reverberated down the passageway.

  Uncle Fester wrapped a powerful arm around my waist and anchored me against his armored chest, “I won’t let you fulfill the prophecy.”

  I struggled against his crushing grip. “What prophecy?”

  “You’re too late. The prophecy has been fulfilled. Or would you have preferred we let her die?”

  I shouted, “What prophecy?”

  Kane appeared next to the dragon. With his long silver hair he always reminded me of Richard Gere. In other words he was smoking hot. His pewter eyes seemed to glow from within as he fondled his huge, razor-sharp Claymore.

  Uncle Fester tightened his grip on Excalibur.

  A feral smile touched Kane’s mouth before he turned his gaze on me. “The Hag predicted a baby girl would be born with the blood of a sorcerer, a slayer and a vampire flowing in her veins. On her twenty-first birthday she must be bound to a vampire or her powers would be forever lost. Whoever binds her will have his powers increased tenfold.”

  “I hate to rain on your parade but my birth father was a slayer.”

  “Actually Jake was a sorcerer,” Uncle Fester inserted warily.

  “Gee, what a surprise. Anything else you’ve lied about?”

  “I had to keep you away from the leeches.”

  “How did that work out for you?”

  Uncle Fester glared down at me. “Tessa was supposed to keep your safe.”

  “Safe? You’re joking right? She made me Bambi’s Alfred. I’ve been lucky to live out the year.”

  “Tessa promised me she would keep you away from the leeches. All I wanted her to do was train you to become an explosives and weapons expert.”

  “Duh, like I wasn’t already?”

  “You needed to learn some discipline.”

  “Right. Keep telling yourself that but the truth is you abandoned me.”

  “I had no choice,” Uncle Fester growled.

  “You had a choice,” Kane responded. “You could have slain the sorceress Morgana. Instead you allowed her to live, knowing she would try to take Ann’s power.”

  “That succubus bitch wanted my power?!”

  Guilt flashed in my uncle’s eyes. “Morgana craved power
and she didn’t care who she had to kill to get it. I did the only thing I could, I hid you.”

  Kane snorted. “You took the coward’s way out when you stole my daughter. You knew McGregor had the balls to do what you could not.”

  Uncle Fester snarled and pointed Excalibur at Kane. “Sepultus est tumulo.”

  A blinding red energy bolt slammed into Father, knocking him on his ass.

  “Omigod! Do you have a death wish?!”

  Kane shot to his feet and my idiot uncle hit him with another bolt.

  Father didn’t even flinch as the energy crackled wildly around him. Then he smiled. A terrifying, you-are-so-dead kind of smile.

  I took one look at merciless gleam in Kane’s eyes and begged, “Please don’t kill him Father.”

  Testosterone reared its ugly head and my uncle roared, “He’s the only one dying.”

  “Are you truly that stupid?”

  Uncle Fester suddenly vanished.

  I staggered backwards and hit the wall. “What did you do with my uncle?”

  “I put him in the dungeon.” Kane patted Modred’s head. “Go play.”

  Modred disappeared.

  “Wait! You can’t let him eat Uncle Fester.”

  “Can’t I?”

  “Omigod, please don’t kill him. He’s family. He’s a bit of a moron but still family. Think of it as a wedding gift.”

  “If he can survive Modred’s fire, I’ll let him live.”

  “If?” Testosterone was the bane of my life. I turned on my heel and stalked down the passageway.

  My father demanded, “Where are you going?”

  “To save my idiot uncle.”

  My stomach turned inside out and poof.

  Chapter Eleven

  I was suddenly standing in a bedroom right out of a medieval playboy’s wet dream. A huge canopy bed draped in black velvet occupied the middle of the room. The gold satin pillows that adorned the massive bed seemed oddly out of place with the thick fur bedspread. A hearth big enough for me to stand in took up one wall and the heavy wooden furniture was museum quality.

  I hurried over to the door and tugged. Dammit, it was locked. I pulled out my trusty pick and inserted it into the lock.

  Zap! I staggered back and shook my numbed fingers. Kane had booby-trapped the door. Let me out father.

  You need to eat and rest. A table laden with a feast fit for a king popped into the room.

  I plucked a roasted potato from a bowl and moaned in pleasure as I chewed. Pure ambrosia. I reached for a plate and then stopped myself. How could I eat when Uncle Fester was getting fried? Bribery won’t work. I can’t let you kill my uncle.

  His fate is in his hands not yours. Eat.

  But...

  If you do not obey me, his punishment will be harsher.

  Being eaten by a dragon is about as harsh as it gets.

  Fester is a warrior and a thief. He has much to answer for. Now eat or I will take Excalibur from him, Kane warned sternly.

  My stomach rumbled hungrily and I caved. I hadn’t had any real food in days. Omigod, there was even my favorite, German Chocolate cake! Could I have a chair, please?

  A cushion chair appeared. I sat down with a sigh. It was like sitting on a feather pillow. Thank you, father. I loaded my plate and fell on the food like a ravaging beast.

  A large armored hand snagged the bottle of wine as I reached for it.

  With a startled gasp, I jumped to my feet.

  His armor dented and smoking badly Uncle Fester tilted his head back and drained the bottle.

  “You’re alive!”

  He belched loudly and slanted me an angry look. “Aye, while I was fighting the bloody bastard you were feasting.”

  I winced. “Ah… Well, Kane said he’d take Excalibur if I tried to interfere.”

  Fester snorted and grabbed another bottle of wine. “Like he could. Just admit it. You’re a chocolate whore.”

  That was just mean. I latched onto the bottle and yanked. “You’ve had enough.”

  He shook me loose and took a healthy slug. “I haven’t had nearly enough.”

  “You can’t fight Kane or Modred if you’re drunk.”

  His eyes burning with suppressed rage, Uncle Fester slammed the bottle down. “This time they’ll never find you.”

  “What?” He reached for me and I darted around the table frightened by the cold, merciless expression on his face. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”

  “You’d rather stay with the leeches?” Uncle Fester prowled after me.

  “Ian’s my mate. I want… need to be with him.” In my heart I knew it was the truth. The nasty vamp was my soul mate. Go figure.

  “A little amnesia spell will fix that.” He lunged for me.

  I ducked under his arm and scooted around the table. “Have you lost your mind?”

  “McGregor killed the only woman I ever loved.”

  “Morgana?”

  “Aye.” He took another drink. “I want him to suffer as I have suffered.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, you’ve really been suffering. How many women have you bedded in the last week?”

  Uncle Fester bared his teeth in an ugly smile. “Did you know the mate bond won’t let McGregor touch another woman?”

  My stomach knotted in sick horror as the truth hit me. “You never cared what happened to me. You didn’t rescue me. You took me from McGregor as revenge.”

  “Aye. Another three years without sex and your leech will be a raving lunatic.”

  “Since you don’t give a rat’s ass about my welfare why didn’t you let Morgana drain me dry?”

  “I promised my brother I would keep you safe. I can’t break my oath.”

  “Gee, I’m so touched.” Grabbing my yummy cake, I hurled it in his face and ran for the broadswords mounted above the hearth.

  With a yowl of frustrated rage, my uncle wiped the chocolate off his face and hurled the empty the wine bottle at me.

  I ducked and the bottled shattered against the wall. My family was a bunch of morally bankrupt, narcissistic whiners. Why did I even bother trying to keep them alive? “How can you love someone who would have killed me to gain power?” Hurling the chair out of his way, he stalked towards me.

  “She was my soul mate.”

  Standing on my tiptoes I managed to grab a sword. “I guess that means you’re a cold-blooded murderer, too.”

  “Maybe it does.” He gestured and the sword flew from my hand.

  Crap.