Hidden Paradise

by A. M. Guilliams

  “Okay. So what’s the problem?”

  He didn’t have a clue. It was so easy for him to just be around me and kiss me like it didn’t matter. But it did matter. More than he knew. I couldn’t stop my heart from getting involved. Not when seven days almost broke me. Not when a couple of hours almost ruined the walls I tried to build to get over him.

  “We have to keep our lives separate from here. Technically, you’re my boss. People will judge, and I’ve worked hard to build my job here. I don’t want to ruin it with rumors and accusations. Plus, outside of here, we’ll be spending a lot of time together. I don’t want lines to get crossed. We have to be friendly for the sake of our daughter. But the kisses can’t happen anymore. I can’t handle my judgment being clouded.”

  I tried to put that the nicest way possible without him seeing through my façade. The fact of the matter was that I loved his kisses. Too much. And I couldn’t let this go south and affect Hali. Her happiness was what mattered most, and two parents who hated each other wouldn’t be good for her.

  “I am your boss, but that’s not going to affect anything here. I won’t allow it to. But we’ll have to tell Trevor eventually. I can’t keep that from him. Especially since he values you so much. As far as keeping this outside of here platonic. I’ll agree to that. For now. You need to trust me, and I plan to show you just how much you can. So can I see Hali again tonight?”

  I loved the enthusiasm in his voice as he spoke of being around our daughter. It gave me hope that this would all work out.

  “Yes, you can see her. You can come over after I leave here, and we can talk some more while you spend time with her if that works for you.”

  “Sounds perfect. We can discuss dinner later. I’ll let you get to it so you can be ready for the meeting later. Oh, and you look beautiful today by the way. Those pants… there are no words,” he replied with a shit-eating grin as he stood to leave.

  “Thorn,” I said with a warning in my tone.

  “I know, I know. I just couldn’t resist. I’ll rein it in.”

  He walked out of the door, shutting it behind him, and I felt like I could finally breathe again. I got busy rescheduling meetings and conference calls. A few couldn’t make them for another day; which meant I would need to stay a little later for the first time in forever. I hated knowing it would keep me from Hali longer than necessary, but I had to do what I had to do to get things ready for the next launch.

  Time had passed in a blur, and it was eight before I was ready. I gathered a fresh cup of coffee and my laptop before I went to the conference room to meet with Trevor and Mr. Caras. I had to keep repeating his name over and over in my mind so that I wouldn’t slip in front of Trevor. It was probably odd to others that here in the office we didn’t call our boss by his last name, but he insisted it was just Trevor. I wondered if he would let everyone call him Arie while he was here. Only time would tell.

  I walked in to both men already waiting for me. Usually, I was the first person to arrive, but I had been so busy that I lost track of time.

  “Sorry I’m late, Trevor. Mr. Caras, it’s nice to see you again,” I said as I sat down.

  Thorn let out a chuckle, and I eyed him cautiously as I tried to figure out what had made him snicker.

  “Really?” he questioned as he glanced at one of the several mugs I had in my office.

  “Yes, really,” I replied as I looked down to see which mug I had mindlessly grabbed from the shelf this morning. Everyone else in the office was used to seeing my funny mugs and a few had even given me a couple as gifts.

  Lady Boss was etched into the glass of this particular mug. I loved this one because it had been given to me by Trevor when I’d decided that it was time to rein in the travel and become better acquainted with life in the office. It signified a turning point in my life. Caused by none other than the man sitting across from me. The irony wasn’t lost on me as I gazed back at him from across the table.

  “You’ll come to understand that each one of those mugs suits her in different ways. Sometimes they reflect her mood or her personality for that day. We all get a kick out of them around here.”

  That’s one of the things I loved about this company. The laid-back atmosphere was perfect for me. I honestly couldn’t see myself anywhere else and had no desire to see what other possibilities were out there.

  We got started shortly after having some idle chit-chat. Trevor discussed Thorn’s role and how he’d be integrated into the company. We also discussed the launch of the new hotel and what was coming up next for the blog.

  Two hours passed quickly, and my hand hurt from all the notes that I’d made in that time frame. When I went back to read over them, I’d be surprised if any were legible with as fast-paced as our conversations went. I knew Trevor would want me to travel for the launch. I’d been prepared for that, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t be nervous with all the work that went into creating the hype and the travel that would be involved to do so. I made another note to get Hali’s passport ordered so she could make the trip. There was no way I was going two weeks without seeing my daughter.

  “Well, we’ve got a solid plan. Now, we just have to implement it. Mr. Caras will be introduced to everyone later this week. I’ll get my assistant to send out the invites to the meeting that will be mandatory. Thanks for getting here early and making this happen, Lily. Your dedication means a lot.”

  I knew it did. That was another reason I didn’t mind what I did. I had a boss who showed appreciation when it was due, and he compensated immensely for the gratitude.

  I nodded at Trevor with a smile and stood to leave.

  “I look forward to working with you, Mr. Caras,” I said as I turned to leave before he could respond. I had to get out of this room. It was hard to focus on work with him sitting across from me, hanging on every word that I said.

  I didn’t know how I’d make this work. But I had to. For both of our sakes. I wasn’t ready to tell Trevor, but with the way I could feel him looking at me, I’d have to spill the beans sooner rather than later.

  Hurriedly, I made my way back to my office, gradually speaking to those who passed me on the way. Once I was behind my office door, I sagged against the metal and let out a sigh of relief. One meeting down. God only knew how many to go. Hopefully, they’d be few and far between while we ironed things out and got into a routine. Because I didn’t know how long I’d be able to keep my game face on when I was in his presence.

  Calming myself down was easier than I thought, and once I had regained my composure I sat down behind my desk and set out to keep myself busy for the rest of the day. I messaged Owen and asked if he and Audrey could relieve my mother since I had to work late. Once I received confirmation, I messaged my mom to check on Hali and to let her know of the change in plans. She told me that Hali was napping and being a sweet girl for her grandma. I loved how my mom treated all her grandchildren with so much love and adoration.

  Hours passed and I even skipped taking a lunch break to keep my mind focused on the tasks I had to complete instead of letting my mind wander to the what-ifs that would plague my thoughts if I let them. There wasn’t any time for them here.

  A knock sounded at the door, breaking me from my concentration. I checked the time in the corner of the screen of my computer and noticed it was just before five. I had a conference call that I needed to get ready for that started in fifteen minutes. I normally cursed the interruptions, but right now I was thankful so I wouldn’t be late for the call.

  “Come in,” I called out while I grabbed the documents I’d need in a few moments.

  The door opened and Thorn walked inside, shutting the door behind him.

  “You about ready to go?”

  “I can’t leave quite yet. I have a conference call that I couldn’t get out of when I rearranged it this morning. I won’t be leaving here until around six, unfortunately.”

  “What about Hali?”

  My heart swelled when his first
question was about our little girl.

  “My mom is at the apartment with her. Owen and his girlfriend, Audrey, are relieving her until I can get there this evening,” I informed him as quickly as I could so I could be ready to start the call.

  “I could do it,” he instantly offered. It meant a lot that he would, but I needed to prepare my mother for news of this magnitude. I couldn’t just let him show up without warning her and providing her with hours of answers. None of which I had time for.

  “No. That’s not a good idea. I haven’t even had time to tell them about you. It’s better if that meeting happens with preparations. Trust me. Owen should be getting to my place in about a half hour. If you want, you can meet him there around five-forty-five to make sure my mom has left, and stay with her. I’ll text Owen and let him know.”

  I wasn’t trying to come off as being rude, but I had to hurry to be on time.

  “I’ll do that and see you when you get home,” he replied and turned then left the office without waiting for my response.

  Perfect. Just what I didn’t need two minutes before this call.

  Clearing my thoughts as quickly as I could, I picked up the receiver and keyed in the numbers to enter the conference call. With any luck, this call would end sooner rather than later, and I could get home before any unnecessary conversations took place.

  As I waited, I texted Owen about the change in plans and sat the phone down without seeing his response. A voice sounded on the other line of the call, and my mind instantly transformed into work mode with one goal in mind. Making the clients happy so I could go home.

  An hour and a half later, they finally had all their questions answered, and I was able to shut the computer down for the night. I hated that this took so long and that I missed these precious moments with my little girl, but it was part of the job, unfortunately. I didn’t even bother checking my phone for fear of the havoc that had ensued during my absence. I just prepared myself for the worst and hoped for the best as I grabbed my bag and headed for the elevator so I could get home.

  Chapter 12

  Thorn

  I had half a mind to ignore her request. The way she sounded was like she was ashamed for her mother to meet me. I was the father of her child for Christ’s sake. I stormed out of her office without meaning to, but I didn’t need to say anything I didn’t mean. Part of me knew I was blowing her response out of proportion, but the other part felt justified in my reaction. I didn’t want to be her dirty little secret. I wanted to shout from the rooftops that she was mine. Pound my chest like a caveman so to speak. Only she wasn’t mine. Yet.

  In the end, I did what she wanted me to do. My rational mind won over the crazy thoughts I gave in to. I needed to earn her trust, and barging into her apartment and introducing myself to her mom before she was ready wasn’t the way to do it.

  At five-forty-five on the dot, I knocked on her apartment door and waited for Owen to answer. This would be awkward enough as it was, but it was going to give me a small window to have a short conversation with the man that was supposedly only friends with Lily. I needed to make sure his relationship with Audrey wasn’t just a front to stay close to her.

  He opened the door with my daughter in his arms and his chin holding a bottle up in her mouth. He moved out of the way so that I could enter and grabbed the bottle with his hand in order to continue feeding her. I wanted to snatch her out of his arms to bond with her, but I refrained. A woman who I assumed was Audrey came into the room from the kitchen and greeted me with her hand out and introduced herself.

  “I’m Audrey. You must be Thorn. It’s nice to meet you,” she said with a smile. She seemed to have good intentions, but I would keep my guard up until I got to know her a little better.

  “Likewise. And yes, that would be me,” I replied and looked back over to my daughter who made grunting noises while she ate. I sat down to watch him with her while she finished her bottle. He seemed to care for her if the way he looked at her was any indication.

  He took the bottle from her, and she let out a wail of protest when he sat her up and placed his hand under her chin. He picked up a cloth from his shoulder and placed it under her chin while she continued to cry. I wanted to go to her and give her back the bottle that she desperately wanted. I didn’t like to hear my little girl cry, but I waited to see how he cared for her. She trusted him with our child, but I didn’t know him enough to feel the same.

  “Come on, sweet girl. Give Uncle Owen a burp and you can have the bottle back,” he spoke softly to her and patted her back. It sounded like he was trying to beat the burp out of her. And Uncle Owen? What the hell was that all about? I didn’t know how I felt about the man who used to have sex with the mother of a child calling himself Uncle, but I was going to have a talk with Lily about my feelings when she got home.

  She let out a loud burp moments later and immediately started crying again. Owen gave her the bottle back as fast as he could, and she started making those cute grunting noises again. I grinned at the sound.

  “She’s a loud, dramatic eater. With the way she acts, you’d think we didn’t feed her at all,” Owen replied as he looked up from Hali to me. We? This was just getting better and better.

  I took a breath to rein in my need to stake a claim. All in due time, I reminded myself before I spoke. I took off my jacket and placed it on the back of the couch to get more comfortable. I loosened my tie and rolled up the sleeves of my shirt before I responded.

  “It sounds like it,” I agreed without taking my eyes off the bundle of joy in his arms.

  She finished eating, and Owen got another burp before Audrey said she wanted to get in her auntie cuddles before she had to leave. What was it with these two? I needed to know before it drove me crazy.

  I signaled for Owen to join me in the kitchen with a nod in that direction. We were going to have this man on man talk sooner rather than later.

  Turning around to face him, I leaned against the counter and crossed my arms over my chest. He stood at the entrance of the kitchen and leaned against the doorjamb, waiting for me to speak.

  “What are your intentions with my daughter and the mother of my child?” I asked, getting straight to the point.

  “I’m not sure I understand what you mean. Intentions?”

  “I don’t understand why you’re still around if you and Lily aren’t together anymore.”

  I’m sure if Lily was here, I’d get an ass chewing from hell for this based on the little I knew about her, but I needed this for me.

  “Look. I don’t know what she’s told you. But, yeah. We were together for a while. We didn’t work out but wanted to remain friends, since that was pretty much the direction that our relationship had taken toward the end. I don’t have those types of feelings for her anymore, I assure you. Do I love her? Yes, I do. Am I in love with her? No, absolutely not. I love her and Hali and will be there for both of them for as long as she’ll allow me to. I know most people don’t understand our relationship from the outside looking in, but we’re okay with it and that’s all that matters. I’m falling in love with Audrey. She didn’t quite understand Lily and I at first, but once they met she loved her like a sister,” he explained.

  I didn’t like it.

  Not one bit.

  Especially the part about him still loving her. Regardless if he was in love with her or not.

  But I’d deal with it for now.

  Especially since he seemed to mean a lot to Lily.

  “Thanks for the clarification. I just needed to hear it from you. Lily tried to explain it to me, but hearing it from you as well gave me more clarification on what I’m dealing with here.”

  I needed him to know I wasn’t the enemy here. Especially if he meant as much to Lily as I had a feeling he did. He’d likely be my in on getting her to trust me.

  “Now, let me ask you what your intentions are when it comes to Lily and Hali,” he asked, mimicking my stance.

  I didn’t owe him any answe
rs, but I’d give them to him just to help my case. I’d do anything for both of them. Including, playing nice with Owen.

  “I already love Hali. Meeting her and holding her last night was all it took. I’m going to be a part of her life and in turn a part of Lily’s. How much of a part will all depend on Lily. We’re still ironing out all of the details. But I want to be more than just friends raising our child. I never liked the way she left, and if she hadn’t done what she did, I’d have been here from the start. But that’s neither here nor there. We can’t go back. Only forward. And I’m working on showing her how much I meant what I told her last night.”

  “I’ll be honest with you. I wasn’t expecting that. Not from a man like you appear to be. But I’ll be glad that you prove me wrong. Just do right by them. That’s all I ask. Oh, and have fun with her brother. I was a lot nicer than they’ll be.”

  “Brother?”

  “You don’t know much, do you? This is going to be so much fun watching this play out. I just hope I’m there when you meet him,” he said with a laugh just as I heard the front door open and shut.

  Owen turned to go into the other room, and I followed. We walked in to see Lily lift Hali out of Audrey’s arms and talk to her softly. She looked up with a questioning gleam in her eyes. She held our daughter close to her chest and rocked back and forth on her feet.

  “What was going on in there? I hope it wasn’t a pissing match. I’m so not in the mood to deal with that at the moment.”

  “No pissing match. I assure you. We were just having a man to man conversation.”

  Owen nodded in agreement with me.

  “Sure you were. Audrey, you didn’t stop them. You knew something like this could happen when they met face to face. I needed you to play referee until I got home.”

  “They didn’t even raise their voices. I was half listening while I got my cuddles in. No blood was shed, I’d consider that a win,” she attempted to joke, but Lily’s foul mood wasn’t having it. Tonight might not be a good night to press for more information.