Moore than a Feeling

by Julie A. Richman

  “I know this is rough, sweetie. But with all the acquaintances we have in common, we’ll know something pretty soon. I’m sure of that. Are you coming out for Memorial Day weekend?”

  The disappointment was evident on Schooner’s face as soon as Holly shook her head. He wanted his whole family together. Nothing made the man happier. The beach house, the ocean, Po and Natie keeping them all amused, and even Zac and Lily were going to be there. He had told Zac, “You’ll have to leave three days in advance or you’ll spend the weekend sitting in Jersey shore traffic trying to get here.”

  But no Holly.

  “Everybody will be there.” Dad-speak for we’re all there to support you if you are having a rough time.

  “I know, but I told my lab partner, Jenna, that I would go to her barbeque on Sunday.” Holly nervously played with her hair.

  Reaching out, Schooner took his daughter’s hand and held it in both of his. “You’re afraid he’ll be there this weekend.” It wasn’t a question. “Do you want us to text you if we see him?”

  Nodding, “Yeah. Will you let me know how he’s doing?”

  “We haven’t seen him yet, so he may not be there.” They’d been out every weekend since Mia and Seth had set-up for the season.

  “But this weekend is it. It’s the official start of summer and everybody’s out there.”

  “We’ll miss you, kiddo.” Schooner wished he could do something, anything to help her heal from this heartbreak. It didn’t escape him that she hadn’t stressed over her break-up with Tom, but it was Aiden who was absorbing her every thought since Mia and Seth had delivered the news of his return and the few details they knew of his ordeal.

  “Busted,” he whispered in her ear, coming up from behind, just as Holly sent a text to Mia saying, Anything?

  Sticking her phone into the back pocket of her worn jeans shorts, Holly smiled at Jenna’s very handsome older brother, Pierce. Man buns were not usually her thing, and pulling one off was reserved for seriously hot men, but this guy totally rocked it. With a casual, laid-back vibe, a few days’ scruff, a very colorful full-sleeve of ink on his left arm, and hazel eyes that leaned more toward green than brown, rimmed in enviably long, dark lashes, this man was hard not to notice.

  Holly immediately felt eyes on them — from everywhere. The glare of all the other single women at the party felt like an undertow of bitchy female energy, making Holly feel more alone than she already did. Alone in a crowd was not an alien feeling to her, though it would probably surprise most people. It generally took Holly a long time to find her crowd, and it typically wasn’t what people might expect her to gravitate toward.

  “It’s a party. You gotta mingle.” His accent was thick New York. He took a swig of his beer. “Or I could just keep you to myself,” he flirted.

  Feeling self-conscious, she changed the subject to neutral ground. “This is my first time in Carroll Gardens. I’ve been in Brooklyn a bunch of times, mostly in the Heights. We have a close family friend there, but I’ve never walked this far down. I love all these brownstones, and the outdoor space your sister has is amazing. Do you live nearby?” She was rambling, and she wasn’t sure if it was because she was so uncomfortable or because he was so good-looking.

  Jenna’s ground-level-floor-thru apartment had exclusive use of the small rectangular yard, which held enough space for a grill and fifteen guests. At the very back of the yard she had a plastic blow-up kiddie pool filled with water. Holly wondered if, as the afternoon heat and humidity climbed, the party-goers would be stepping in to cool themselves off.

  Taking a swig from his beer bottle, Pierce shared, “Not too far. I’m in the Slope. No private backyard, but I’m not too far from Prospect Park.”

  “That must be nice.” Trying hard to stay in the moment, Holly searched her brain for something to say to this handsome, seemingly nice guy, and her mind just blanked out.

  “So, let me ask you a question,” he began, filling in the silence. “My sister tells me you’re not involved with anyone. How is that possible?”

  Holly smiled, Pierce had obviously been inquiring about her. New Yorkers were so direct. That had initially taken some getting used to, but it was actually refreshing, and moved things from superficial to real at warp speed, and that was something she liked. “Bad break-up. Still recuperating.”

  “Is he fucking nuts?” Pierce took another swig.

  Watching his throat muscles and Adam’s apple in motion was oddly erotic. Maybe it’s the sheen of sweat covering them, Holly thought, followed immediately by the memory of Aiden’s salty skin waking the taste buds on her tongue.

  “I’ll volunteer to be your transition guy,” offered Pierce with a smile.

  “Thanks. Appreciate the offer, but you’re a little late to the party.” Holly laughed.

  “Well, he’s not here, what happened to that guy?” Pierce was persistent.

  Reaching out and taking the beer from his hands, Holly took a swig. “I think we’re going to need some Jack for that story.”

  “You, I like.” He laughed. “I don’t think my sister’s got any, but there’s a liquor store up on Court Street, we can take a walk up there and get a bottle.”

  “Let’s do it.” Holly wanted to get away from the stare of female eyes that were taking on an increasingly hostile glare, especially those of a brunette who was going to regret her dark microbladed eyebrows when, in a few years, she looked back at pictures of herself.

  As they walked down Second Place, Holly asked, “So, what’s with you and the lady in the revealing pink halter.”

  Pierce started to laugh and began to cough. “Holly, that ain’t no lady.”

  “No? Now I’m intrigued. I’ll bet you have a lot better stories than I have.”

  “I don’t know how she got an invite today. She’s my version of a stalker.”

  “Did you deserve it?”

  He thought for a moment. “Yeah, probably.”

  “Drive-by?”

  “Yeah, I couldn’t pull out fast enough.”

  Holly’s eyes widened, as she looked at him, the front of her sandal catching on the uneven sidewalk. Reaching out and catching her shoulder, Pierce steadied her.

  “Oh shit, that didn’t come out the way I wanted it to.”

  “So I gathered.” She laughed.

  “Woman, I am tongue-tied around you. I was trying to sound really smart and hit you with a driving metaphor, but I fucked that all up.” He gestured to a store, and grabbed the door, holding it open for Holly. “Whiskey aisle all the way to the right. Not that I would know that.”

  Holly turned around and smiled. “I like a man who knows his way around.”

  Grabbing a bottle of Jack from the shelf, he turned to Holly who was checking out the single malt scotches. “Anything else?”

  “No, I think Jack is enough.” She ran her fingers slowly down the side of a sleek scotch bottle. “Single malts just remind me of my dad.”

  “Have you not seen him in a while?”

  “No, I see him all the time. He’s just out on Fire Island this weekend.”

  “Your parents are on Fire Island?”

  Holly nodded. “Yes, we have a house in Ocean Beach.”

  “And you are not there because?” He paused. “You like humid, sweltering days in the city where the heat rises off the sidewalk and bitch slaps you in the face?”

  “It’s complicated.”

  “Family complicated?”

  “Oh no, family is great. Ex-boyfriend is not so great.”

  “So, the heartbreak guy is out on Fire Island?”

  Pulling the phone from the back pocket of her shorts, she checked Mia’s message. No sign of him at all.

  “No, doesn’t look like he’s there.”

  “Someone is sending you messages about it?” He was surprised.

  “Yes.” Holly laughed. “My stepmother.”

  Opening the low wrought-iron gate leading to Jenna’s brownstone, Pierce headed up the stone s
tairs and sat down on a step instead of heading back through his sister’s apartment to the yard. Joining him, Holly watched as he opened the Jack, still in its paper bag. With the black cap now off, he handed Holly the bag for the first swig and she didn’t disappoint, downing a hearty swallow and handing it back to him.

  “Woman, you just keep impressing me more and more.” And he followed suit putting down a healthy swallow before handing the bag back to Holly. “So, do you know what we’re doing here?”

  “Getting shitfaced?” Holly ventured.

  “Yes, that, too. But what we’re doing right now is stooping. Have you ever stooped before?”

  Wide-eyed, Holly shook her head. “No. I think I’m a stoop virgin.”

  Mid-swig, Pierce started to choke at Holly’s comment. “Thank God, I’m not too late to that party. In case you are wondering, what you are sitting on is called a stoop. And we are stooping.” Elbowing Holly playfully, he reminded her, “So, wait. You were supposed to tell me about transition guy. The guy who stole my spot. What happened to him?”

  “My mother happened to him.”

  “Give me that bottle back. Your mother? What did she do to him?”

  “You might want to take another slug of that first.”

  Smiling, he brought the bag to his lips. “This better be a good one.”

  “Trust me, you can’t make up this crap.” Holly reached out for the bag, taking a courage swig before continuing and spilling family dirty laundry to a virtual stranger. “My mother has no moral compass. I will start off by telling you that. It’s like not even shattered, she just straight up doesn’t have one. Whatever means necessary to get the results she wants, is fair game to her. She didn’t want me seeing this guy.”

  “Why?” he interrupted.

  With her already inebriated courage propped up, and doing just a slight lean, she smiled at her friend’s too-damn-handsome brother. “True confession time. She didn’t want me seeing him because he was, well, he was a lot older than me.” And then in a rush, “He was also my stepmother’s ex-boyfriend.”

  Spitting out the Jack in his mouth, they both laughed at his reaction. “No freaking way did I expect you to say that. You are full of surprises. I had you pegged for wholesome, a little aloof, maybe snotty. Totally wrong on all counts. Your stepmother’s ex? Really?”

  “In my defense, I didn’t know that at the time. And we were all surprised. It was just kind of this random thing.”

  “Okay.” He drew out the two syllables. “So, what did your mother do to him?”

  “Ah, that is the big mystery. Only the two of them know that for sure. He wouldn’t tell me. But I know it was bad.”

  “Like threatened him?”

  “Probably more along the lines of blackmail. And I wouldn’t doubt that there is a sexual element to it. One that she initiated, and he might not have been a totally willing participant.”

  “I’m really confused.” His brows knit together as he tried to follow the story. “Do you think she slept with him?”

  “No, but something happened. Like I said, my mother gets what she wants by whatever means she needs to employ.” Pulling out her cell, she scrolled through pictures and handed the phone to Pierce.

  “That’s your mom? Wow. She’s beautiful. You look like her.” He continued to stare at the picture.

  Reaching for the phone, she scrolled and handed it back to him. “And that’s my dad.”

  “Man, he’s in good shape.”

  “He owns health clubs.”

  “Health clubs plural.”

  Holly nodded.

  “Like franchises?”

  “No. No. He would never franchise out the business. Each facility is his concept. He’s very protective of the brand. He’s meticulously built it over like twenty years.”

  “What’s the name of it.”

  “Level 9.”

  “Your father owns L9?”

  Holly nodded again.

  “Beautiful, smart, nice, and rich as shit. This guy who broke your heart is one dumbass.”

  “Thanks.” She took another swig.

  “Okay, so now that you confessed to dating your stepmother’s ex who was then, we think, sexually molested by your MILF mama, I have a confession to make. But I’m warning you, it’s not nearly as good as yours. You definitely win confession of the day.”

  “’Fess up, dude.” Holly elbowed her new buddy.

  “I’ve never been to Fire Island.”

  “What? No way! And you grew up here, right?”

  “Born and raised.”

  “And you’ve never been to Fire Island?”

  “No, I usually go out to the beaches on the east end. My band has played semi-regularly at EBI.”

  “What’s EBI?” Holly asked.

  “Ahh, you are clearly not a native of the area. EBI is a place you totally need to go. EBI stands for Echo Beach Inn. It’s a club/bar out on Echo Beach. Big summer hangout.”

  “So, you’re in a band. I should have guessed. You look like a musician.” Holly waved at a young couple walking with a baby jogger who waved back at her and Pierce, wishing them a happy Memorial Day. Drunk stooping was fun.

  “Thanks. I think.”

  “Why aren’t you playing out there this weekend? This is a big weekend. Shouldn’t you be out on the beach?”

  “Because two of my bandmates have mono.”

  “Remind me not to kiss you.” Holly looked at the bottle of Jack, pondering if she should be sharing it with this stranger, but decided, in her already drunken state, that the 80-proof alcohol would be the victor, obliterating any mono germs.

  “I’m too drunk to remember to remind you.” He hit her with a slightly crooked smile.

  “Do you have a day job?” she wondered aloud.

  “Now I do, since I’m not making money off my music this summer.” The look on his face clearly said he was not thrilled about it.

  “What do you do during the day?”

  “I’m a programmer.” Then he added, “But I’d rather be sleeping after a late-night gig.”

  “You’ve really never been to Fire Island?” Holly’s mind had circled back to their earlier conversation.

  “Never.” He shook his head.

  “Let’s go.” The spontaneous thought made her smile, and in the moment seemed like the most brilliant idea she’d had in forever.

  With a look that said, Are you serious? He asked, “Like now?”

  “Yeah. Like right now. We could take the train out and then a cab to the ferry.”

  “I have to go home and get stuff.” It was difficult to get his brain clear enough to work through the details.

  “Go do it,” she urged, nodding him on.

  “Bossy,” he smiled. “Are you sure? Your family won’t mind?”

  Waving a hand at him, “My family totally embodies the more the merrier philosophy.”

  “And what if we run into the heartbreaker?”

  “Mia said he’s not there.”

  “And Mia is who?”

  “My stepmom.”

  Pulling out his phone, “Okay, I’ll get an Uber back home. What do I need?”

  “Shorts. Tee-shirt. Bathing suit. Toothbrush. Flip flops.” It was taxing Holly’s brain to try to come up with a list.

  “Can I buy the stuff there? Then I don’t have to go home.”

  “Yeah, there’s shops right when we get off the ferry.”

  “So, an Uber to Penn Station?” he suggested

  “Totally, I’m too trashed to get on the subway.”

  “Let’s go tell my sister we’re leaving.” Pierce suggested.

  “Is that girl in the pink halter going to scratch my eyes out?” Holly was envisioning the stalker chick chasing them out onto the street.

  Thinking for a moment and realizing Holly had a point, “Maybe we should just leave. We’ll text Jenna once we’ve made our getaway.” He ordered the Uber. “There’s a car three blocks away.”

  Unsteady on their
feet, they stood. As a small white car pulled up outside the gate, they made their way down the steps.

  Laughing, “I can’t believe we’re doing this.” Pierce smiled at Holly.

  Pointing to the bag sitting on the stoop, “Don’t forget Jack.”

  “My faux pas.” He laughed, running back up the steps to retrieve the catalyst to their journey.

  “Wake up.” Holly shook Pierce. “This is our stop.”

  “Wow, that went fast.” Rubbing his eyes, he looked out the train’s window as they pulled into Bay Shore station. They had talked most of the trip, Holly sharing the Aiden/Fire Island saga before they both dozed off somewhere around Bellmore. “Holy crap, I’m still drunk. Are you still drunk?”

  Picking up the bag between them on the seat, Holly uncapped the Jack and took a gulp before handing it to Pierce.

  Following suit, he took a swig and then laughed. Looking at Holly, “Your parents are going to wish transition man was back in the picture when they get a whiff of me. I smell like a human distillery.”

  Looking at her watch, “Most likely they’ll be out on the beach for a bit, so we’ll have time to clean up our acts and maybe sober up a little, too.”

  Exiting the train, they could already smell the salt on the breeze. “Okay, so we can take a cab, or walk it. It’s about a mile. And we’ll have enough time before the next ferry, even if we walk.”

  Pointing to a concession stand, Pierce suggested, “Why don’t we grab a couple of water bottles and hoof it.”

  “I like the way you think.”

  “I like everything about you.” He gave her a side-eye. “Too bad you’re still in love with someone else.”

  Looking at him sad-eyed, she sighed. “Maybe I just need closure. I just want to see him and talk to him.”

  “He could show up this weekend.”