Ryan's Love (Sawyer Brothers #1)

by C. A. Harms

  She laid her hand on top of mine and began tracing my knuckles with her thumb. That small connection by itself made me feel soothed and at peace.

  “My place is about a mile past the tree line over there.” She looked back over her shoulder, and I nudged my head in the direction of my home. She turned slightly, looking toward the spot I indicated, just before she looked at me. My gaze shifted between her gorgeous brown eyes and the fullness of her lips. She lightly licked along her lower lip, and my heart pounded a little faster. The hand I had rested on her thigh lifted almost of its own accord and cupped her face, holding her in place. She turned just a little more, and I lowered my lips to hers.

  Amber whimpered when I traced my tongue along the seam of her lips. The moment she opened up for me, my body instantly relaxed. The remnants of something sweet coated her tongue, and I wanted more. She smelled like cookies and the essence of some sort of spice.

  Between the soft feel of her skin beneath my palm and her tiny body hugged tightly to mine, I was lost in all things Amber.

  I nipped at her lip before pulling back to look down at her, and she followed me, chasing after my mouth for more. She was lightly panting, and her lips were reddened from our kiss. She looked absolutely beautiful.

  I glided my thumb over her lower lip and lowered my hand back down to grip the reins. “Let’s take a ride,” I whispered. She nodded in agreement, biting on her lower lip. I repositioned her body back against mine before I nudged Storm along once again.

  Being with Amber felt so right, it was almost scary. In the back of my mind, my guilt about Claire sat heavy, pulling at me every chance it got. I felt like I was cheating on her, but I knew that was a feeling I needed to let go of. I’d just never imagined I would kiss a woman other than the girl I fell in love with at a very young age.

  ***

  “So this is where you grew up?” she asked as she walked out onto the dock at the lake. She turned back to look over her shoulder, then lowered herself to sit on the edge.

  “Yeah,” I said as I took a few steps closer. Her face lit up with excitement as she removed her boots. My eyes were locked on her as she began rolling up of the legs of her jeans. She smiled brightly while lowering her feet in to the lake, laughing when the coldness of the water first touched her skin.

  She tapped the space next to her. “Join me.” Hopeful anticipation oozed from her statement.

  Without hesitating, I began removing my own boots and socks. After cuffing each pant leg, I took a seat next to her and lowered my feet into the water. “Damn, that’s cold.” I shivered from the icy impact.

  She giggled at my reaction and reared back as I kicked at the water, splashing her legs.

  Before I could stop her, Amber lifted my hat off my head and placed it on her own. I cocked my brow at her, smiling at how relaxed she had become. Even though the shy girl was still there, she’d let down her guard, and another side of her was shining through.

  She raised her hand once more and combed her fingers through my hair. I caught them and pulled her hand toward my mouth, and she watched closely as I placed a soft kiss against her wrist. The entire exchange felt so natural. I was amazed at just how comfortable we were becoming with each other in such a short time. It was as if we’d been sharing tender moments like these for years.

  She turned back to the lake, a bright smile covering her mouth as she swung her foot in a circular motion, causing the water to slosh around our feet. “I could stay right here and be perfectly happy. It’s peaceful, like nothing out there beyond our view matters.” She closed her eyes, tilting her head toward the sky, and took in a deep breath. “It even smells pure. Nothing smells this great in the city,” she whispered.

  I swallowed hard, acknowledging in that moment just what Amber was doing to me. I never in my life imagined another woman being capable of making me feel this way.

  “You’re so beautiful.” The statement fell from my lips without a second thought.

  She opened her eyes and looked over at me. The gentleness in them warmed my heart and made me feel so comfortable. “Thank you,” she whispered. “You’re not so bad yourself, Cowboy.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Amber

  Our night together was perfect.

  Ryan was perfect.

  I hadn’t wanted to ruin our date by bringing up Olivia’s visit, but it still sat heavy on my mind. I was more than positive he understood how much his actions affected her, and I knew I couldn’t hide my meeting with her. I wouldn’t want him to feel as if I was unable to be honest with him

  We were sitting in his truck outside the entrance to my apartment. After a long day at the ranch, where we road Storm over the entire property, we called it a night. As he skimmed his thumb over the side of my neck, I closed my eyes and focused solely on the way my body reacted to his touch. He was gentle, and with each passing moment I felt more and more comfortable being near him.

  With his arm rested across the back of his truck seat, he turned toward me. My eyes fluttered open, and I found his gaze focused on me, the last thing I wanted to do was ruin this perfect moment. But I had to bring up what happened earlier. We needed to talk about Olivia.

  “I need to tell you something,” I said. He stilled his thumb from stroking my skin as our eyes connected. I hesitated briefly before continuing. “Olivia came to see me yesterday.” His face fell, and he shifted in his seat uncomfortably. “She’s upset and said she wanted to see me for herself,” I continued. His jaw ticked, and the last thing I wanted was to anger him, but I felt he needed to know. “I don’t want to be the person causing her sadness, Ryan. It was evident she was upset.”

  “I’ll talk to her,” he assured me and turned around to open his driver’s-side door. I watched as he crawled out and walked around the front of the truck before opening the passenger door. He held out his hand and helped me down.

  He was silent as he walked me to my door, and just when I thought he was going to kiss me, he pulled me in for a quick hug. His lips brushed over my temple, and then the warmth of his body was gone as he stepped away and forced a smile. “I’ll talk to ya later.”

  I stood frozen in the doorway of my apartment as he spun on his heel and charged off toward his truck. He climbed in, and the taillights quickly became the only indication he had been within reach just moments ago.

  It had been an amazing, almost perfect day, until now.

  ***

  The next day started out crazy. We were overwhelmed with customers, and to top it off, our oven was going out. I didn’t have time to deal with even more issues than Olivia and her obvious dislike of Ryan and me dating today. My mind was boggled at Ryan’s reaction last night. By the time four o’clock rolled around, Bailey and I were beat. We both collapsed in the stools at the bar, resting our arms against the countertop and heaved out a relieved breath now that the day was finally over.

  “So what are we gonna do about tomorrow? We can’t cook goodies without an oven.”

  Her statement only reminded me that my day wasn’t over yet. I wanted to curl up in bed and forget about the last twenty-four hours—well, except my time with Ryan at the ranch.

  I leaned forward and let my forehead rest against the cool countertop. “I need to call the repair man,” I groaned as I lightly banged my head against the marble.

  A knock at the front door brought out an unrecognizable growl from within me. I didn’t even raise my head to see who it was, so I was startled when Bailey started squealing in excitement.

  As I spun around in surprise, the stool beneath me began to tip, and I gripped the counter to stabilize it. Instantly my eyes pooled with unshed tears of happiness. “Alena,” I squeaked and ran toward Bailey and my cousin as they stood in the doorway hugging one another.

  Alena was a few years younger than me. After she graduated college with a business degree, she took a year off to travel. She’s more like a sister than a cousin, and she, Bailey, and I were inseparable growing up. We got ourselv
es into a little trouble back in Chicago, I’ll admit. When she decided to travel, I was heartbroken, knowing I would have to go without seeing her for so long. Now here she stood before us, and she was like a breath of fresh air already blowing away the remnants of my horrible day.

  Bailey and Alena released their hold on one another just in time to accept me into their little circle.

  “Oh my God, what are you doing here?” I asked, squeezing Alena hard. “Not that I’m unhappy to see you, but I wasn’t expecting it.”

  “I told you I was flying straight here when my trip was over. A year is a long time to spend without my two favorite people,” she said.

  She was right, a year felt like forever.

  “But you still had two more weeks,” I replied.

  “Yeah, I know.” She shrugged. “I missed my girls, so I cut it a little short.”

  We locked the front door before dragging her straight upstairs to our apartment, where we gathered on the couch as she began sharing stories of her travels. She fanned her face when she talked about the guy she met in Rome.

  “But let me just clarify something,” she said. “I’ve been in this town for less than an hour, and the men in Montana are some damn sexy specimens. I met this cop because I took a wrong turn, and I’ll tell you what, he had to repeat his directions twice because I lost my mind because of how his lips moved with each word.” She wagged her eyebrows. “I almost took him hostage and drove off to somewhere secluded. I could think of a hundred naughty things to show him.”

  When she mentioned a cop, both Bailey and I looked up at one another. A smirk pulled at the corner of her mouth, and I narrowed my eyes at her. “Amber knows a certain cop pretty well. In fact, she could tell you what his lips and hands feel like against hers.”

  I threw a couch pillow at her, and it hit her in the side of the head. She fell back against the cushions, laughing.

  “Spill it,” Alena insisted.

  “We only went out twice. It’s nothing, really.” I waved it off because I truly didn’t want to have to explain. I didn’t know myself exactly what Ryan and I were doing. I knew we liked each other. We had fun and the chemistry was there. I just didn’t know if we would ever be more to each other than just two people having a little fun, enjoying each other’s company.

  “It doesn’t feel like it’s nothing,” Alena pushed, and I knew I wasn’t going to get away with not giving her at least a little detail.

  “His name is Ryan.” I pause for only a few seconds. “He lost his wife a few years ago and hasn’t really dated since then. He has a teenage daughter, and she’s having a hard time accepting that her father is dating.” I shrugged. “So right now, things are a little unexplainable. I don’t know what we are or if it will even go anywhere. But he’s really sweet, and I enjoy our time together.”

  “He’s not just a cop, he is a sergeant,” Bailey jumped in. “He is ‘drop to your knees and pant from being overheated with lust’ gorgeous. Amazing eyes, amazing body, and those hands…mmm.” She shivered to accentuate her statement. “He is so yummy.”

  I watched her with a smile, because this was the first time she’d described Ryan that way. I knew she thought he was attractive, but her giving these details surprised me. Her gaze shifted to mine, and she held her hands out to her sides and laughed. “What? So I pay attention to detail.”

  Alena and I laughed.

  “God, I need to get laid,” Bailey breathed out and flopped back against the cushions. Alena and I tried to hide our laughter, but it was pointless.

  Due to Alena’s arrival, we decided a night out was in order. Especially because Bailey and I had been so busy getting things together for the bakery, we hadn’t taken the time to get out and enjoy ourselves. So after I called the repairman and was told he would be here first thing in the morning, we all got ready for a girls’ night. I hadn’t heard from Ryan since last night when he dropped me off. I was trying my hardest not to let that bother me, so some distraction would be perfect.

  After dinner at a rib shack just down the road from our apartment, we found the nearest bar and began playing Shots or Dare.

  “I dare you to walk over to the bar and kiss that man in the red shirt,” Alena said to Bailey. We’d all had more than enough shots and were feeling a little more adventurous than when we first arrived. No, we weren’t drunk, but we all were definitely feeling the buzz.

  Bailey and Alena always tried to outdo each other in everything, including picking up men.

  I bit my lip to control my laughter as Bailey stood up and squared her shoulders. She wasn’t about to back down. “I’ll be right back, girls.” She winked at us before stalking toward the bar.

  We watched as she tapped the guy on his shoulder and he turned to face her. His eyes lit up at the sight of her, and my jaw fell open. It was Jackson, Ryan’s youngest brother.

  Before I could stop her, she placed her hand around the back of his neck and pulled him against her. Their mouths collided, and Jackson stood from the stool and pinned her against the bar, curling his hands around the edges on each side of her.

  Whistling and a few catcalls rang out around them. The way the two of them were devouring one another made me feel like I was watching soft-core porn, especially when Jackson pinned Bailey against the side of the bar with his pelvis pressed firmly against hers.

  When they finally pulled apart, they were breathless and their gazes were glued on one another. Bailey finally whispered something to him just before placing her hands on his chest and pushing back, creating space between them. He watched her as she walked back to us, a wide smile still gracing her lips. Jackson’s gaze locked on to mine, and his grin widened even further.

  Bailey attempted to gracefully place herself back into her chair but failed miserably. She was a little off-center after that heated kiss. “Oh holy hell,” she said breathlessly. “I can’t slow down my heart.”

  “I’m pretty sure he can’t, either.” Alena replied. “That was hot. Like the ‘drop to your knees and pant from being overheated with lust’ kind of hot.’”

  “You do know that guy is Ryan’s brother, right?” I told her, and her eyes grew wide.

  She spun around and looked back at him. He still had the biggest grin as he sipped his beer and tapped away on his phone.

  Laughter spilled from both Alena and me as she stared at him in awe. I was sure at that moment they weren’t finished after just one kiss.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Ryan

  Jackson: I’m at Roger’s Bar and guess who else is here?

  I stared at the pictures attached to my brother’s text message. Amber was at a table with Bailey and another girl I’d never seen before. They were obviously out enjoying a girls’ night. Shot glasses and beer bottles sat scattered across the tabletop in front of them. Amber was laughing and hunched forward just slightly. It made me feel a little better that Jackson was there to keep an eye on them.

  I was still a little down from the interaction I had with Liv last night. I came home late after Amber told me about Olivia’s visit, my mind racing with thoughts of what my little girl must be feeling. She was obviously hurting and I had to fix this. The idea of her being sad made it difficult to breathe.

  Apparently I arrived a little earlier than my daughter expected me to, because I found her making out with Charlie on my couch.

  Keeping my cool was not in the cards.

  I gripped the back of Charlie’s shirt and tossed his ass out my front door. I warned him off, saying if I ever caught him with his tongue shoved down my daughter’s throat again, he would most likely have a difficult time eating solid foods, because I would knock out every tooth in his mouth.

  Of course Olivia started yelling that she hated me. She told me if I was dating, why couldn’t she? When she slipped up and told me I was being an asshole, I lost the last ounce of control I had left. I may have gone a little overboard, but she was only acting this way to get back at me. She was rebelling, and I was torn
with how to handle it. Finally, my temper won out over being understanding.

  I called my mother and told her she needed to come get her granddaughter before I beat her ass. Olivia scowled at the thought of me bending her over my knee, ran off to her room, and slammed her door behind her. She had a bag packed and was waiting on the front porch when my parents pulled up.

  I sat on the couch just inside, my head in my hands. I didn’t know what the hell to do next.

  “Son,” my father said as he entered the front door. I didn’t look up, even when the couch dipped next to me.

  “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore,” I confessed. “She hates me, but I can’t be alone anymore. I’m miserable, Dad.”

  My father rested his hand on my shoulder and gave me a squeeze. “She just needs time.”

  “We never fight. We’ve always talked things out. Olivia and I have been so close over the last three years—hell, even before that.” I took in a deep breath. “I thought I did things right. I talked to her before I even took Amber out that first night. I wanted her to know I’d always love Claire. That no matter where my future led me, her momma would always be in my heart.” I sat on the couch next to him and cried like a baby.

  I felt the burn in my chest as I remembered how I felt the moment my father entered my home last night. The entire night rushed back as I looked down at the picture my brother had forwarded.

  My phone vibrated once again, and I read the next message.

  Jackson: Looks like someone is moving in on your girl.

  Another picture was attached, showing Booker and another rival of mine Eric sitting at the table in Roger’s Bar with the girls. I tightened my grip on my phone. Eric had tried more than once to come between Claire and me. Seeing him so close to Amber only fueled my already unstable mood. I sent a text back.