Worth the Wait

by JB Heller

  I don’t get rough, I don’t lose my shit, I don’t let go of my control. Not often, anyway. And this is a side I haven’t shown Ellie yet. I’ve been content to go at her pace. I still am. But I had to shut down whatever the fuck was going on in that pretty head of hers. She’s not the only one who’s holding back. I have my reasons too, she just doesn’t know them yet.

  But she’s going to. And soon. I just have to figure out how to tell her.

  ELLIE

  Instead of having hot, sweaty sex last night, Zak surprised the shit out of me, refusing my seduction attempt. But his sweet words soothed the ache of rejection squeezing my heart. He wants me as much as I want him—that much is perfectly clear. He couldn’t get that hard if he wasn’t into me. Right?

  He came up to my apartment and we cuddled on the couch while watching Longmire on Netflix. We stayed like that for hours, until sometime around midnight he kissed me goodnight and left.

  I sat, staring at the door, wondering what I could do to turn things around. Because I’m ready. I want him. Badly.

  But wanting Zak has never been my problem. I’ve wanted him from the beginning.

  Cursing under my breath I drop my head into my palms, why can’t I stop second guessing myself?

  One second I’m so sure of how Zak feels about me, the next I’m wondering what kind of man turns down sex? And it’s not because I doubt Zak’s character, I don’t, not even a little bit. But myself? I still doubt myself. And I don’t know how to make it stop.

  My alarm blares on the other side of my bedroom. I groan and rub the kink in my neck from falling asleep on the couch after Zak left. I woke a few hours later and made the move to my bed, but I couldn’t settle.

  Rolling over until I almost fall off the mattress, I drop my legs over the side of the bed and wriggle until my tiptoes touch the cold timber floor.

  Shuffling over to my dresser I turn off the alarm, pull out a set of fresh underwear, shorts, and a tank, then enter my bathroom with a yawn. I turn the hot water up and add a little cold to get the temperature just right. Shucking off my jammies I slip under the spray. The hot water feels incredible pounding on my tense neck and shoulders, a sigh escapes me as I relax and enjoy the sensation of pressure easing from my aching muscles.

  By the time I finish my morning ritual, I only have ten minutes to spare before I have to leave for work. I make my coffee in a travel mug, rushing out the door I lock up quickly and hurry out to my car.

  My Papa is already at the garage when I arrive, sipping his morning coffee as he leans against his old restored ‘67 Ford Galaxie. I smile at him as I approach, and he gestures for me to come in for a hug.

  Wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I press a quick kiss to his cheek. “Morning, Papa.”

  “Buongiorno, Principessa,” he greets and I curl into his embrace, revelling in the comfort only a Pappa’s hug can provide. When I pull away from him, his eyes narrow almost imperceptibly as he takes me in.

  I wipe my hand over my cheek. Is there something on my face? “What?” I ask, moving my hand to my ponytail. There’s nothing out of place, but the weight of his stare is making me awfully self-conscious.

  “You look…” his eyes roam over me once more, “Unsettled.” His thick Italian accent curls around the word, suspicion clear in his tone.

  Twisting away from him, I call over my shoulder, “I’m fine, Papa, I promise,” I blow him a kiss as I retreat to my bay inside the garage. Damnit, how does he do that?

  Ambling over to the locker, I stow my bag and pull out my overalls tugging them on over my tank and shorts. My old grease stained overalls bolster my mood, I earned every mark on them, they are my armour, and I am invincible when I’m in them.

  By lunch time, I’ve fixed the oil leak in a little Ford Fiesta and started servicing a beautiful Chevrolet Silverado. My stomach grumbles, signalling it’s time to get some food. I take an extra couple of minutes to return my tools to their correct positions. A fact I’m constantly teased about, but hey who do the other mechanics come to when they can’t find their own damn wrench? Me.

  Wiping my greasy hands on a rag I unbutton the top half of my overalls and tie it around my waist then retrieve my bag from my locker. It takes less than five minutes to walk to the deli two blocks down from Papa’s garage, and I’m hanging for a fresh panini. Grabbing my usual from the cold case I head outside to sit on the sidewalk and people watch while I eat.

  Just as I relax back into the metal chair I chose, I notice Giano—one of my ex’s—weaving through the other tables, then he has the gall to curl his dirty hand around the back of the seat across from me and drop down into it like he belongs here.

  My glare is soul deep. I envision him melting slowly, oozing through the slots in the seat, and pooling into a thick gooey puddle under the table. Smiling to myself, I go back to eating my lunch, pointedly ignoring his presence.

  “Elisia, baby, don’t be like that,” he coos.

  His voice makes my skin crawl. How did I ever fall for his shit? “Don’t call me that,” I snap.

  He smirks. “What? Elisia or baby? You used to like it when I called you baby.”

  “Either,” I shudder. “Just don’t speak to me at all. I can’t stand your voice.”

  He guffaws, “You used to love it.”

  A pitying smile curves my lips. “Used to being the key words there, fuckface. You ruined that, not me. So how about you leave me the hell alone and go crawl back to your wife!” I seethe, my smile long since having melted away.

  The prick pursued me for weeks when he started working for my Papa last year. He was sweet, always bringing me flowers and complementing me as often as possible. He never spoke down to me like the some of the other men at the garage. Being a female mechanic isn’t a popular career choice and a lot of guys take offence to it.

  But Giano never did. He was kind and polite, even pulling up the other guys when they gave me shit. Conveniently, he couldn’t wear his wedding ring at work. It’s not safe. We’d been seeing each other for almost three months when his wife brought his forgotten lunch into the garage for him.

  He turned the whole thing on me. Apparently, it’s my fault for not asking if he was married before I agreed to date him. Dickhole.

  The longer he sits there, the hotter my blood boils in my veins. His eyes stay fixed on my face, and I refuse to acknowledge him. Stuffing the panini into my mouth again, I take a huge bite, chewing deliberately.

  He sighs audibly. “You’re being dramatic. And she’s my ex-wife now. All my loose ends have been tied up. We can be together now. That’s what you wanted. So, quit being such a little bitch about it.”

  I snort and push away from the table, the metal chair legs screeching against the concrete footpath. “What the hell would give you that impression?” I don’t want to be with you, you arrogant asshole.” I don’t wait for him to reply, pressing my palms to the cold metal table top, “You’re a cheating scumbag. There is no conceivable circumstance in that I would ever want you back. If you don’t stop this…” I pause, leaning down until I’m just inches from his face. “I’m going to remove your testicles with your own bolt cutters.”

  My eyes burn holes through him. He swallows, and I drop my gaze to see one of his hands is under the table, protectively cupping his balls. I raise a brow, urging him to respond.

  Adjusting himself in his seat, he straightens, squaring his shoulders. “It’s not like that. She and I hadn’t been close for a long time. So, it wasn’t really cheating,” he tells me, running a hand through his slicked back hair.

  My eyes widen and I shake my head, “You’re pathetic.” I snatch up my half-eaten lunch and storm away. What a self-centred buttmunch.

  Chapter Four

  ZAK

  Looking down into her forest green eyes, she pants for breath, begging me to stop my assault. This moment may very well be the happiest I’ve ever been.

  “Mercy! Mercy!” Ellie squeals from beneath my tickling fingertips.
“I’m sorry! You’re. Not. A. Sasquatch!”

  Relenting, I lift my hands an inch away from her tiny body, allowing her to catch her breath momentarily. Raising a brow, I ask, “Are you sure? Because you sounded pretty certain of your assessment.”

  Tears ebb at the edges of her eyes. “I swear, never again. I’ll never call you a Sasquatch ever again. As long as you keep those pee inducing fingers away from my tickly spots.”

  I grin and offer her a hand to sit up. “Deal, for now.”

  Curling her delicate fingers around my palm, she allows me to help her into a sitting position. Red keeps hold of my hand as she shuffles closer to me on the couch until she’s tucked tight into my side. I wrap my arm around her petite shoulders, loving the warmth of her against me.

  Ellie smiles up at me, and again I’m struck by just how happy she makes me. She doesn’t even have to try. Being her quirky self is all I need. She’s like a little fireball of fresh air, giving me a new outlook on life. She’s bubbly and vivacious, but I’ve seen her shoot a loaded gun with a look of concentration that would put my uptight friend Abe, to shame.

  I’m not one of those sappy blokes who believe in fate or soul mates. And love at first sight? Yeah, no. But the second I saw her flying through the lobby of that flash hotel in fluorescent green leggings, with a look on her gorgeous face that made grown men cup their balls, I was a goner.

  “What are you thinkin’ about, big man?” Ellie asks, tilting her chin to look up at me, “You’re smiling awfully bright for no apparent reason. It’s kinda creepy.”

  Chuckling, I slide my hand down her thigh towards the spot just above her knee that I know will make her jump if I give it a little squeeze. “That’s not very nice,” I tell her, edging my hand closer to the spot.

  Her eyes shoot to my hand, snatching it up between both of hers lightning fast. “No, that’s not very nice,” she argues, flashing her eyes back and forth between my face and her knee.

  “I was smiling because you make me happy, you crazy little gremlin. That’s all.” I roll my eyes and flip my hand so that it’s laced with hers. “Can’t a man enjoy your company without it being creepy?”

  She snorts—actually snorts—and it’s fucking adorable. “Ah no, that’s not how this is supposed to work. You’re supposed to be sick of me by now, not sitting around all dreamy eyed and smiling at me.”

  This conversation is getting old, and it’s definitely not one of my favourites. Groaning, I settle back in my couch because I know exactly where this is going, and despite our conversation the other night, she’s still on about it. My fists clench, my eyes close, and I take a deep, steadying breath.

  “Don’t give me that look, Zak,” she demands, crossing her arms under her breasts. “Yes, we’ve talked about this before. Yes, I go on about it a lot. And yes, you always disagree. But I’m telling you, none of my relationships ever work out. I’m a lot to handle, and apparently men don’t like that.”

  Before she can continue on with her self-depreciative speech I gently, but firmly, place my hand over her mouth. “Enough, Ellie,” I tell her, my tone leaving no room for misinterpretation. I mean business.

  To my absolute shock, Ellie listens. Her jaw slams shut beneath my hand. I expected her to lick it or try to bite me—it wouldn’t be the first time—but she does nothing. Her eyes lock on mine, uncertainty and confusion shining in their depths.

  I drop my hand slowly from her mouth, then slide it around her jaw. “Enough,” I whisper as I move in closer, bringing my chest just an inch from hers. Keeping our eyes locked together I explain my frustration. “You say men don’t want to stay with you because you’re a lot to handle…and Red, you’re right.”

  Her entire body solidifies.

  Sliding my hand down her throat I feel her pulse race rapidly under my palm. The further my hand travels, the softer her body becomes. It’s just her stubborn resistance keeping her from melting into me the way I know she wants to.

  When I reach her hip, I squeeze. A tiny moan escapes her before she can stop it, and I smirk. Not once have I allowed my eyes to roam her incredible body. I read everything she refuses to say aloud in her green depths. She knows I’m different. She knows this thing with us is different.

  I know she says she’s ready for sex, but apprehension is clear in her eyes. And I refuse to take her until she is as sure about me as I am about her. Bringing my free hand to her other hip I curl my fingers into her flesh that peeks from her between her T and shorts, then lift and swing her into my lap. The startled look on her face vanishes the instant she feels my erection pushing up into her ass. Her gaze morphs into desire and lust.

  “I want you, Angel. I’ve wanted you from the second I laid eyes on you. You fascinate me. Entertain me. Calm me. Captivate me. Arouse me. And you do it all, without even trying.” I press my forehead against hers as I relish the feel of her rapid breaths against my lips. “Don’t doubt me. Don’t doubt this. Us,” I plead, sick of dictating how she should feel, but desperate for her to understand. “I am not them.”

  Finally, after what feels like an eternity, Ellie nods against my forehead. “Okay,” she whispers. I feel the relief that one single word brings, all the way down to my goddamned toes. Her hips rock against me, ever so gently, teasing me. Her soft hand slides around my neck, coming to rest in the hair at my nape. She stokes her long fingers through my hair and I tip my head back, letting her take control, and loving every second of it.

  She presses an open-mouthed kiss to my throat, scraping her teeth against the sensitive flesh as she moves down to my collar bone. My cock is rigid, straining to be freed. Her ass pushes harder against it, grinding down on my length. My fingers dig further into her lush hips as I take over, shifting her until my cock presses against her centre, then I set the pace.

  Red’s breath comes in short, hot pants against my skin as she moves back up, peppering kisses and licks against my stubbled jaw until she reaches my mouth. She nips my bottom lip, drawing it into her wet mouth, sucking hard then releasing it with a pop.

  Lifting my head, unable to stand it any longer I tell her, “You don’t want this to go further, Angel, I know you’re not ready. But goddamn, if you don’t climb off me right now so I can go to the bathroom and finish what you’ve started, I’m going to do it right here,” I groan, but all the while my hands keep her hips moving against me.

  Ellie flushes, a deep blush spreading up her chest, her throat, and her cheeks. “Do it,” she pants, “Let me watch, let me help you.”

  My eyes widen, I haven’t let her touch me before. Not really. A little over the pants action doesn’t count. She lets me touch her though, and the thought of her wrapping those delicate fingers around my girth has me unfastening my shorts in record time.

  I should be asking her if she’s sure about this, if she is certain she wants to go to this stage with me, right here, right now. But she said she wants to have sex, this isn’t sex, but it’s more than we’ve done before. It’s a step in the right direction.

  Words refuse to leave my lips when I feel her hot stare on the outline of my erect cock through my briefs.

  Pressing my feet into the floor I lift my hips, keeping one hand on Ellie’s hip to keep her steady as I reef down my pants and underwear enough for my cock to spring free. Before I’ve even dropped to my ass again her hand is curled around me, fisting my cock in her tight grip. “Jesus,” I hiss.

  Her fingers struggle to meet, but I don’t care. It’s enough. She’s enough. She pumps me slow…too slow. I wrap my fist over hers and jerk my cock hard and fast. Her free hand joins in, cupping my balls, rolling them in her palm. I want to watch, and I keep my gaze on our joined hands for as long as I possibly can, then she stops. Out of nowhere, she just freezes.

  Her eye lock on mine as she shimmies off my lap, pushing my knees apart as she comes to kneel between them. Oh fuck. She reaches for my dick again. This time she pulls it towards her lips, and I have to slam my eyes shut as her hot, wet mouth env
elops my tip. My hips shoot up automatically, pushing further down her throat.

  My teeth grind, my jaw locks, and my fist clenches in her ruby red locks. My pulse pounds so loud in my ears it’s deafening. “Fuuccckkkk,” I hiss.

  Ellie continues to work me with her mouth and hands, little moans emanating from her as she licks, sucks, and strokes in a perfect rhythm. I shudder when her emerald eyes lock on mine.

  I can’t stop it, the tightening in my balls is almost painful when I finally let go. “Coming,” I grunt, throwing my head back when she refuses to let me pull out. I groan as my release coats the back of her throat in my come.

  I’m still recovering, my head pressed into the back of the couch, trying to catch my breath, when Ellie suddenly stands. I jerk upright, my head spins with the rapid change in position. “What’s wrong? Was that too much? I’m sor—” My eyes go wide and I just about swallow my tongue as I realise what she’s doing.

  Her hand is at the band of her blue denim short shorts, the buttons open and the zip undone. Red’s fingers move to her hips as she wriggles out of her shorts and thong.

  Dear god. Oh-my-holy-fuck.

  “Nothing’s wrong. It was perfect. And don’t you dare be sorry for the most erotic moment of my life,” she says in a husky whisper.

  I swallow hard, licking my lips. All I can do is nod in response. She’s so beautiful. I can’t take my eyes off her. They roam her body but flick back down to her pussy at the hint of movement down there. Her small hand slides down her stomach, hovering just above the promised land.

  “Can I?” The question is out of my mouth before I’ve fully processed it. I want it so bad. To touch her. To feel inside her. To feel her quiver and shake with release around my fingers, my tongue.

  Ellie’s lips lift in a devious grin. “I thought you’d never ask.”

  I’m on my feet in a heartbeat. My palms press into her waist, then slowly trail down her sides as I walk her backwards into the wall. She lands with a light thud against it, but I don’t pause or slow down. She likes it, I can feel it in the way her skin prickles beneath my touch.