Worth the Wait

by JB Heller

  Dropping to my knees, I look up at her for a second as I lift her right leg, draping it over my shoulder. A whimper escapes her parted lips, and it’s my turn to grin. Her soft red pubic hair is trimmed into a neat heart shaped patch. I chuckle softly, then bury my nose in the small thatch of curls, breathing her in.

  “Zak,” Ellie whimpers again, the leg supporting her quivers beneath her, and I lift it to my shoulder as well. Her hands fly to my head, steading herself. “Oh god,” she shrieks.

  And I haven’t even started.

  ELLIE

  It might not be sex, but this is just as good in my book.

  Zak lifts his eyes to meet mine, and lust shoots through my body like a raging inferno. His eyes shine with mischief, looking up at me from between my thighs, and I wait for him to close the small space left between his mouth and my aching centre.

  I’m beyond wet. Sucking Zak’s cock is the hottest thing I’ve ever been a part of. I’ve given blow jobs before, but with Zak it’s different, better. The way he watched everything I did, the heat in his gaze, the way his thighs clenched right before he came in my mouth. So. Fucking. Hot.

  Zak drags my focus back to him by blowing a warm breath against my sex and I shudder, my thighs tensing around his neck. He grins, then gets to his feet, still holding me up by my exposed ass. “Zak,” I squeal as he starts walking us towards his bedroom.

  Kicking his door open all the way, he ducks down so as not to hit my head on his doorframe as he strides inside. He drops me on the bed, then snatches up his three-legged cat, Junie, and unceremoniously tosses her out of the room before slamming the door shut. The feint sounds of her pissed off meows echo through the door.

  I grin as he stands above me. He snatches my ankles up in his large hands and tugs me to the edge of his mattress. I gasp, then he’s there, his fingertips pressing into my thighs so hard I whimper.

  Zak’s eyes glaze with lust. “Fuck, Ellie, I’ve been dying to taste you.” He buries his nose between my folds until it presses against my clit, and his tongue sinks inside my entrance.

  Swallowing hard, I tangle my fingers in his dark hair, trying to pull him in closer. But he clenches my thighs harder, making me stop. Releasing his hair, I lift up onto my elbows, but before I can ask what I did wrong, he lifts his head and stares right into my soul.

  Licking his lips slowly, he says, “I let you take control in the lounge room, but this time…” His eyes drop to my wetness, then flick back up to mine, “I’m in control. I will own your body with my mouth then when you’re ready, I’ll own every part of you with every part of me.”

  He doesn’t say anything else, just holds my gaze until I nod. How does he manage to make such dirty things sound sweet?

  I stay propped on my elbows so I can watch him. His eyes are so dark, black pools of need and desire, mirroring exactly how I feel. He drops his face down and without warning, spears two fingers inside me, making me wail in surprise. And then he moves them in and out rhythmically, his tongue traces circles around my clit. So close, but never touching.

  Panting, my head dips back, and his teeth finally graze my overstimulated clit. My focus snaps back to him, to his tongue, his teeth, his fingers as he presses the tips to that perfect spot inside me. I go off like a rocket.

  Tingles shoot down my arms, my legs, and out my fingertips and toes. My body feels deliciously light and sated as my hands fist in the bedspread bringing me back to earth. “Oh god,” I murmur, my voice soft in the aftermath of my orgasm.

  I think he’s done, that he’s going to stop but then his fingers increase their speed again. He stokes harder, faster, rougher, then sucks my sensitive little nub into his warm mouth and bites down hard. His fingers hone in on my g-spot and I’m coming again on the tail end of the first orgasm. Silent tears roll down my cheeks as pure pleasure consumes my entire body.

  Chapter Five

  ZAK

  Fuck, she’s beautiful. The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. And she’s laying in my bed.

  Happiness like I’ve never known before wraps around me, filling me, making me whole for the first time in my life.

  “Stay tonight,” I tell her. I’m not really asking, and the gleam in her eyes tells me she knows it.

  The sun set while I was between her thighs, and I watch her yawn then stretch her arms out over her head, arching her back like a cat. Speaking of cats, Junie is scratching my closed bedroom door, meowing incessantly. I could lay here staring at Ellie until she falls asleep, but Junie isn’t going to let that happen.

  Sitting on the edge of the mattress, I smile down at her. “God, you take my breath away Red,” I sigh. She smiles back at me, not showing an ounce of shame at her near nakedness. I love how comfortable she is in her own skin.

  MEOW. Scratch-scratch-scratch.

  “Jesus,” I mutter, “I’m coming!”

  Ellie snickers, and I slap her exposed thigh playfully.

  “I should feed her,” I say, tilting my chin in Junie’s direction, “Speaking of feeding, what do you want for dinner?”

  Ellie shrugs, a contented smile curving her full, pink lips.

  Pushing to my feet, I refasten my pants as I walk to the door. I can feel Ellie’s eyes watching me as I go, and fuck if I don’t love every second of it. Swinging open the door, Junie is up on her back feet, balancing as she leans forward to peer into my room, wondering why I kicked her out. When she spots Ellie on the bed, she drops back down and curls herself around my ankles, purring.

  I scoop her up and she nuzzles into my chest, her purr so loud I can feel the vibrations seeping into me. Scratching behind her ear, I drop a kiss to the top of her little head. “Ready for dinner, baby?” I coo, and she meows in response.

  “I don’t know if your relationship with that cat is cute or concerning,” Ellie mutters as I stride down the hall with Junie snuggled in my arms.

  I smile at her sass, but say nothing.

  Junie is just like me. Nobody wanted her. She was rejected by three foster families before I found her on death row in the shelter. We’re kindred spirits, me and Junie. And I don’t care if my girlfriend thinks it’s weird how much I love my damn cat, she wouldn’t understand—not many of my friends do.

  Growing up in the system is hard. No, it’s worse than that. You only have yourself to rely on. Unless you find a friend amongst the other kids, which isn’t always easy when they all have their own shit to deal with. I was one of the lucky ones, in that I found Lulu. Or she found me—I’m not even sure anymore.

  I finish up giving Junie fresh water, kibbles, and wet food, then shuffle around the junk draw until I find the Thai Restaurant menu from down the road. Quickly scanning it as the call dials, I order enough for Ellie and I, before returning to my room to find her snuggled in my sheets, snoring softly.

  My lips curve as my eyes roam over her petite body in my king size bed. She’s so tiny, but she’s taken up such a huge part of my heart. Falling for her the way I have isn’t something I thought was possible. At one point, I thought I was in love with Lulu, but after meeting Red, I know I had been wrong about Lu.

  Lu and I, we are the same, just like me and Junie. She knows me better than anyone else in this world. Our connection is unbreakable. Thinking about her makes me reach for my phone so I can call her, but I left it in the kitchen when I ordered dinner.

  I leave Ellie to sleep for now—I’ll wake her when the food arrives. Swiping my phone off the kitchen counter, I hit Lu’s contact and sit on the couch. My knee bounces nervously as I wait for her to answer. Things have been strained between us for months now. We’ve never been at odds for this long before. But I fucked up. I get why she pulled away.

  “Hey, you,” her soft voice comes down the line. It calms me. I worry about her constantly, her current boyfriend is not a good dude, he’s a drug runner. Lu may have put space between us, but I still look out for her, as much as I can from a distance.

  “How’s it going?” I ask, knowing she won’t t
ell me even if things have gone to shit between them—not after what happened last time. Running my hand through my hair in frustration, I wait for her answer.

  I hear her take a deep breath before speaking, “Good actually, but ah, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

  Instantly I’m on high alert, “Okay,” I say, trying to keep my tone cool and collected. “Shoot,” I tell her as my free hand clenches and releases over and over.

  “Not over the phone. I want to see you, it’s been too long. We’ve got a lot to catch up on.” She sounds fine, like she’s not faking it, and maybe things really are going good for her right now.

  Maybe she’s even over what happened between us. We’ve only seen each other once since then, “I’d love that. I miss you, Lu. When and where, honey? I’ll be there.”

  Her breathy chuckle comes down the line and I smile, “Let me figure it out. I’ll text you with a place and time later this week, yeah? I just—I need you to be ready to listen okay?”

  “Alright,” I tell her, I can do that. “And, Lu…” I pause.

  “Yeah, Zee?”

  “I really have missed you, honey. Does this mean things can go back to normal now?” I ask the question I’m dying to hear the answer to.

  Her swallow is audible through the phone, “Things will be different, I think. Not bad, and not like they have been, just different,” she says. “I had a lot to come to terms with, and shit I had to figure out, but I’m ready to talk about everything now. I gotta go, but I’ll text you, I promise.”

  “Okay, love you, Lu, talk soon.” I end the call.

  I just about launch off the couch when I see Ellie standing like a statue in the entry to the lounge room, anger etched over her perfect, tear stained face. Getting to my feet I remain silent until I reach her. I lift my hand to take hers, but she snatches it away and takes a step back.

  “You lying son of a bitch! How could you? You were supposed to be different!” she screams at me, her pain and anger streaming down her cheeks piercing my heart.

  “Fuck, Red,” I ignore her protests and pull her into my arms, “Whatever you think right now, you’re wrong.”

  Planting her hands against my chest she pushes back with all her might. “Let me go! You said you love her, Zak! I heard you!”

  When I don’t loosen my hold, she begins pounding her fists into my chest, hammering as hard as she can. I feel all of it, her pain, her anguish. I made her feel like this. The knowledge makes me want to drop to my knees and beg for forgiveness. But first she needs to understand.

  I walk her back until she’s wedged between my body and the wall. “Red, baby, stop!” I demand. She relents, dropping her fists from their assault and wrapping her arms around herself as best she can.

  “I have never lied to you. Never.” I start with the first truth she needs to hear. She attempts to argue so I bring my left hand up to cover her mouth and halt her objections.

  “Just listen. Then if you still want to castrate me, I’ll let you.” I stare down into her gleaming green eyes, the hurt in them squeezes around my heart like a fist. “Ellie, I told you about my friend Lulu, remember? We grew up in the system together. She’s like my sister, Red.” I wait for my words to sink in, and when she seems to relax, I slowly move my hand away from her mouth and release her altogether.

  Ellie remains deathly still. I don’t take my eyes off her face as she processes what I told her. The second her shoulders slump and her head drops, I take her in my arms again. “Shh baby, don’t cry,” I plead.

  Her chest heaves with deep intakes of air as she tries to calm herself. A loud knock at the front door startles us both, and I remember I ordered dinner for us. Holding her at arm’s length, I lean in and drop a kiss to the top of her head. “That’s dinner, Red. Go wash your face with some cold water then we can talk about this, yeah?”

  Ellie nods, then steps forward, squeezing me in a quick embrace before darting down the hall to the bathroom.

  Another knock sounds from the front door and I swipe my hand through my hair. “I’m coming!” I call as I mentally kick myself for allowing Ellie to feel like I could ever cheat on her. Especially after we just moved things forward physically. It’s the last thing she needs, given her history with men.

  Swinging the door open with more force than necessary, it ricochet’s off the wall and almost slams shut in the delivery guy’s face again. I snatch it before it can close, and hand him the cash for our meals without a word. He hands over the food and legs it back to his car.

  Placing the takeout containers on the coffee table, I pull it closer to the couch then retrieve cutlery from the kitchen as I wait for Ellie.

  ELLIE

  How could I jump the gun like that? I didn’t even give him a chance to explain himself before I lost my shit. I just made a complete and total fool of myself. My chin trembles as embarrassment overwhelms me. So stupid Ellie.

  I do remember Zak telling me about his friend Lulu that he met as a kid in the foster system. They bonded, and he protected her from their foster father until he was removed from the home. But she wasn’t. Zak looked after her whenever he could after that. They had still lived in the same neighbourhood and went to the same school.

  He doesn’t talk much about his past, or his childhood. I don’t even really know what happened to his parents, just that they’re gone. But from how he talks about Lulu, on the rare occasion that she comes up in conversation, he’s made it clear that she’s all family he has.

  I shake my head, shit, I’m so angry with myself. Rubbing my hands over my face I glare at my tear streaked reflexion. The longer I stand here looking at my splotchy face, the more questions float around inside my head.

  I’ve asked about meeting her sometime, but whenever I do, he kind of shuts the idea down and changes the topic. I never understood why, but I let it go at the time. She’s clearly important to him. Why would he not want me to meet her?

  Turning on the cold water I wipe my puffy eyes, determination fills my belly, I need answers. And I think right now is the time to get them.

  Chapter Six

  ZAK

  Ellie has been in the bathroom for twenty minutes. Our food is going cold, and I’m getting more wound up by the second. Unable to wait her out any longer, I approach the bathroom and knock on the door. “Red, can I come in?”

  Pressing my ear to the door, I listen carefully for any sign she might still be crying. That would kill me. I hear nothing, so I knock again. “Ellie, can we please talk about this?” Even I can hear the desperation in my voice.

  The door flings open so fast I have to catch myself on the frame to stop from crashing into her. “Shit, sorry,” I mutter, pulling myself back to give her some space.

  She runs her hands down her now fully clothed body and straightens her shoulders. She’s ready for a fight. “Yes, I think now would be a great time to talk,” she says, pushing past me and heading back to the lounge room.

  Following after her and not knowing how this is going to play out, kills me. Ellie is the only thing in my life that has always seemed right. From the very beginning she was all I could see, and she still is. If my relationship with Lu is going to ruin that, fuck, I don’t know what I’ll do.

  Apprehension and anxiety course through my body making it hard to breath. I cautiously gage her movements, she’s stiff and uncomfortable. It immediately puts me on guard. I wait for her to sit on the far side of my three-seater couch, then I take the opposite end, not wanting to crowd her. But also hoping like hell she can see what this is doing to me.

  Ellie licks her lips then twists upper body to face me. “We obviously need to have a chat about your friendship with Lulu. Yes, I remember who she is to you, not that you’ve gone into much detail about that. But I can understand why you wouldn’t want to talk about a traumatic time in your life.” She takes a breath and her eyes find mine for the first time since she exited the bathroom.

  I finally relax a little when I see tender
ness and compassion shining back at me. I shrug, “It’s not something I like to dwell on. I live in the here and now. I can’t change the things I went through, but I don’t have to keep reliving them.” Talking about the way I was raised is not one of my favourite topics.

  I knew this conversation was coming. It had to if our relationship is going to go anywhere and I’ve been dreading it from the moment we met. But I don’t want her to see just heavily this weighs on me. I don’t want to scare her.

  Red shuffles a little closer to me and I can’t handle the distance left between us. I need to feel her close. So I reach over the gap and tug her into my side, throwing my right arm over her shoulder along the back of the couch. “I’ll tell you whatever you want to know, just don’t walk away from me. Please?”

  Her big green eyes meet mine, insecurity written clear in her features. My heart sinks. “Red, you know how I feel about you is real. It’s unlike anything I’ve felt for another person.” Unable to stop myself from touching her, I graze my fingertips over her cheek. “Lu is special to me. She always will be. But not in the same way you are. The way I feel about you and the way I feel about Lu, are completely different. But both are strong.”

  She nods slightly, “I know. But, it’s just…the way you were talking to her on the phone, it sounds like there is more between you two than you’ve led me to believe. I hate feeling like this, Zak, like you’re keeping something from me. I don’t want to think like that, but why else would you shut me down every time I’ve asked to meet her?”

  I release a breath, and nod in acknowledgement. “You’re right. But not in the way you’re thinking,” I blurt, before she can get upset again. I squeeze my arm around her shoulder and tug her as close as I can get without pulling her into my lap. “At one point in my life I thought I loved Louisa,” I admit on a sigh.