A good dose of reality.
I knew I could never really leave her, she was the love of my life and I couldn’t live without her.
“Chase, honey, what are you doing here?” The door opened as soon as I stepped onto the porch and my mom poked her head out. I looked around the living room and only saw Chris who gave me a brief wave, before burying his head back into his architectural magazine.
“All the little ones are upstairs playing. Now would you like to tell me what you’re doing here and why you look like you’re in a very bad mood?” My mom, all five feet of her, stood with her hands on her hips and her eyes narrowed at me. I hadn’t gotten that look very often growing up, I had been a little spoiled since I had been the only boy, but I knew that look meant business.
“It’s Leah, I just don’t know what to do anymore, Mom. I tried talking to her about what Katie suggested and she didn’t breathe a word to me. Not one damn word. I got upset with her and left. What should I do, Mom? I’m definitely in need of some of your advice right about now.”
“Oh, Chase.” She sat down and patted the empty spot next to her. “I know how hard this has been on the both of you, especially Leah. Right now, she needs time, but I know you’re worried about her. You should be.
“I think you made the right choice tonight by leaving before you did or said something you regretted. You need a good night’s worth of sleep and then tomorrow you should address the situation again with a clear and calm mind. You know I support you one hundred percent in anything you do. We all love Leah and only want what’s best, honey.”
I nodded my head and swallowed thickly after hearing what my mom had to say. She always had the perfect words. “Thanks Mom, I think you’re right. I’m going to run up and check on Caleb and then turn in for the night. Maybe Leah will see things a little more clearly tomorrow.” I stood up and kissed her on the forehead, before jogging up the stairs. I knew Leah needed time, but I think she needed a little guidance. It truly would be the best thing for her and our relationship.
Chapter 16
Leah
I ran to the front door when I heard it slam shut so hard it caused the windows to rattle, and watched as Chase peeled out of the driveway. I couldn’t believe he had actually left me. I had never heard him so angry before and I could see why he left. I was mad at myself.
It was my entire fault.
I walked through the empty house, flicking all of the lights on as I went through. It was eerily quiet and I couldn’t stand it. I walked back into our bedroom and looked at the bed, dreading having to go to sleep tonight without Chase. I hadn’t let him touch me, but still knowing he was there was comforting.
I walked into the bathroom, looking into the mirror as if it were going to give me some kind of magical answers. Why was I pushing him away? I couldn’t comprehend why I was doing it.
I pulled out my makeup bag for the first time in a month. I couldn’t sit in this house any longer. I was going out to live a little.
I pulled my car in to the familiar parking lot that sat behind Gino’s and took a deep breath when I stepped out of the car, breathing in the enticing scent of pizza and pasta, and it instantly made my stomach rumble. It felt good to be here, it seemed to bring some sense of normalcy back to my life. I was sure they had replaced me by now, even though Gino had said my spot would be kept open indefinitely.
Sure enough when I walked in, two unfamiliar girls were manning the busy tables. It brought back memories of the many late nights Remy and I had worked together, avoiding the wandering hands and trading the different one- liners that seemed to get thrown at us all night. Gino was there though, like always a permanent fixture, and he waved as I took a seat at the bar.
“Leah, so good to see you, darlin’. My favorite worker ready to come back yet?” He placed his meaty hands on the counter in front of him and gave me a wide smile, showing off his perfect white teeth.
“I don’t know about that Gino, just needed to get out for a little bit.” I couldn’t imagine having to be around this many people and having to interact with them on a daily basis. The thought made me sick to my stomach.
I could just imagine the looks the regular customers would give me if I came back. They all knew about the pregnancy, and well now, there was no baby and I’m sure they had heard the gossip from the other waitresses. I didn’t want their pity.
“Okay, well you look you need to gain a few pounds, at least I could help out with that. What would you like to eat?”
Always so worried about my weight. I swear if Gino had it his way, I would be as round and plump as him. I guess when you were that good of a cook, especially Italian food that tended to happen.
“Nothing, actually.” Even though my rumbling stomach certainly didn’t agree. “Just came in for a drink. Can I get a…um…a cranberry vodka?” Hopefully, he would forget the fact that I wasn’t twenty-one yet. He raised his eyebrows at me in question, but thankfully didn’t say anything, just slid my drink across the counter silently and gave me a small wave before heading back into the kitchen, his personal domain.
I squirmed in the seat, looking around at all of the people who filled the restaurant, crowded together at tables, talking and laughing. I felt alone, a feeling that I had become very familiar with lately.
Everything seemed to hurt and I wasn’t sure how to fill the gaping hole in my chest. Caleb was gone, Ally and Remy were off following the band on tour and Chase...I think Chase might have finally given up on me. Truthfully, I probably deserved it.
Maybe I was more like my mother than I thought. There had to have been a reason she turned out the way she did and it rubbed off onto me too. Her relationship with her mother had basically been nonexistent and she could have cared less about her own kids. That’s exactly what I was doing to Caleb.
I looked down at the glass that sat on the bar in front of me and swirled the contents around before draining it. Yup, I was officially turning into my mother, but at this point I didn’t care. I couldn’t.
“Can I buy you another?” I turned my head at the semi familiar voice and tried to place the guy who was sitting next to me. He had chocolate brown hair that was just long enough it made it unruly and he was gazing back at me like he knew me or something.
“You don’t remember me, do you?” He slid back on his barstool, licking his lips nervously. “I come in all the time, you probably waitressed my table only a few hundred times.”
“Ah, that’s why you look familiar. Sorry, when you’re waitressing in a place like this, all of the faces tend to run together besides a few of the regulars that come in for breakfast.” I turned my body straight again and thanked the bartender when she refilled my drink.
“I thought you didn’t work here anymore. I came in a few times and didn’t see you around. I guess it’s just my luck that you’re here tonight.”
“So, what does that mean you’re stalking me or something? I don’t really believe in luck.” He barked out a short laugh and drummed his fingers lightly on the countertop.
“No, definitely not stalking you. I’ll admit, I use to come in here at least twice a week and would always request your table though. My friends thought I was crazy and would tease the shit out of me for having a crush on you. I’m Grant, by the way.” He stuck out a hand and I awkwardly reached out to shake it. “And I already know you’re Leah. So why’d you stop working here? Did you finish school and get a job?”
“Nope.” I answered back simply. I really wasn’t going to spill my guts to this random person.
“Okay,” he dragged out. “Well, I can leave if you want me to.” He stood up, sliding his barstool back but I reached out an arm to stop him. “No, please stay.” His eyebrows scrunched in confusion, but thankfully he sat back down. I guess any company was good company tonight, even if he was pretty much a complete stranger. He was someone who had no clue what had really been going on in my life lately and I didn’t see pity in his eyes. It was refreshing. “I could use a lit
tle bit of company if you don’t mind.”
“Not at all,” he replied with a grin and sat back down.
We talked for what felt like hours. Well, I guess Grant talked and I listened mainly. The more he talked, the more I remembered him. He used to come in with a group of friends that were constantly hitting on me the whole time I waited on them. Grant had seemed to be the quieter one of the bunch, but I didn’t know if that was a front he was trying to put up at the time or what. Because he hadn’t stopped talking at all tonight.
The bartender kept my drinks flowing and I felt myself loosening up more and more as the alcohol took over my body. When Grant asked if I was ready to leave, I agreed and he led me out of the restaurant, his hand resting on the small of my back. If it hadn’t been there, I’m not sure how I would have made it out the front door.
I pulled my keys from my pocket, but they were quickly plucked out of my hand. “No way Leah, I’m not letting you drive home. You certainly aren’t in any condition.”
“And you are?” I raised an eyebrow at him and he smirked at me, holding his arms out to the side of him and walking a perfect straight line across the parking lot.
“We sat there for like two hours, Leah and I had one beer. You on the other hand, well I think I lost count. They most definitely should have cut you off a while ago. I’ll take you home if you want or maybe back to my place.” My stomach fluttered with nerves when he said the last part. Had I been leading him on all night or what? I knew he had a crush on me, he basically came right out and said it. Was it wrong to want a little bit of human connection tonight, especially with someone who I barely knew. Grant definitely wasn’t treating me like a delicate flower.
I shrugged my shoulders and leaned against his car. “Maybe I’ll just stay here all night.”
“I don’t think that’s a very good idea. You never know who’s roaming these parking lots at night. It’s probably not safe.” His warm breath tickled my neck as he inched closer and he looked down at me with intense eyes. He reached down and ran a finger lightly across my cheek. I wasn’t sure what to do. My feet were frozen to the ground, but it actually felt nice to have someone touching me, it made me feel...alive.
“Leah-” I didn’t let him get any further. I don’t know if I could blame my actions on the alcohol clouding my brain or how my emotions had been turned off for the past month.
“Just shut up,” I whispered against his teeth and crashed my mouth into his. He took control immediately, winding his hands in my hair to pull me closer, and probing my mouth with his warm tongue like he had been waiting for this kiss for a long time.
It felt...I don’t know how it felt. He was aggressive, almost like he was trying to eat me alive as he cupped my ass to lift me up against the car and slid his fingers underneath my shirt. My legs wrapped around his waist and I sunk my fingers into his dark brown locks. If anyone in this parking lot wasn’t safe, it was definitely me. I had no clue what I was doing, but I knew one thing. He wasn’t my husband.
**********
I woke up to a warm body sprawled over me, one arm wrapped around my waist, and the other lifting my shirt to expose my bare stomach. I squeezed my eyes shut, wondering what in the hell was going on. Brown eyes ran through my head and I winced, hoping I hadn’t just made a really huge mistake that could mess my life up even more than it already was. What was his name, Grady or Brant? No, Grant.
Warm, open-mouthed kisses trailed up my stomach, sending shivers down to my toes. I reached down, running my hands through the hair that belonged to the head currently working on me, and let out a small sigh of relief when I felt the familiar scruffiness of my husband’s head.
He slid up my body and stared down at me when he heard me. Those green eyes were looking at me so intently; I couldn’t help but reach up and run a hand along his strong jaw.
“I’m sorry, baby,” he whispered out in his husky voice, leaning down to bury his head in the crook of my neck. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you last night. Please forgive me.”
I swallowed over the lump in my throat, knowing that Chase was the last person who needed to be forgiven. I was the one who had messed up. Chase lifted his head, smoothing back the curls that had fallen across my cheek. “I forgive you, Chase,” I squeaked. The guilt that was eating away at me seemed like it grew even bigger. Like I needed to forgive him.
He leaned down tentatively, probably afraid I was going to push him away, but I couldn’t. I already felt guilty enough that I had let things go so far with some guy last night that I had just met officially. How far did things go exactly?
My head was a blur and pounding, by my guess I had my first ever hangover. How people could drink like that all the time like my mother, I would never know and she did almost on a daily occasion. Feeling like shit is not my idea of a fun time.
Chase pulled my bottom lip in between his teeth, lightly nipping it before sucking it into his mouth. When he let go of my lip and finally intertwined our tongues, a moan escaped. He always tasted so good.
He pulled away all too soon and dropped down to my neck, trailing a line of kisses down until he reached my collarbone. His tongue slipped out and swirled around in circles before he lightly bit down. “Leah, I’ve missed this, so much and I’ve missed you,” he breathed out. I pulled his body closer to mine in response, hopefully conveying the same feelings to him.
I felt the same way too, even though I hadn’t realized it until just then. My body was trembling at the anticipation of what was to come next. Chase must have sensed my fear even though it was mixed with excitement. He worshiped every inch of my body with his lips before hooking a thumb in my panties and lifting my shirt over my head all of the way.
He slowly slipped inside of me and we both let out a sigh at the familiar feeling of our bodies connecting together. He placed his forehead against mine, never looking away from me, not once. His eyes were filled with unshed tears and I felt like I couldn’t breathe by the intense way he was staring down at me while he rocked against me. I locked my legs around his waist, hoping I was showing him just how much this meant to me too.
His warm hands slid down my sides, gripping onto my hips to pull me closer against him, as he moved at almost a rhythmic frantic pace, like he was afraid I would shut down again any minute.
“Leah, I love you so much,” he growled out, never letting up. I reached up a trembling hand to run along the stubble on his face. I had no idea how this man could still love me so much after everything I had put him through. And then I screwed it up even more by what I did last night.
I squeezed my eyes shut, slightly shaking my head at the guilt, no I wasn’t going to think about that right now. “I love you too, Chase. More than you’ll ever know.” His gaze turned even more heated as our bodies slapped against each other and I worked to keep up with his quick pace.
Every nerve in my body exploded and I swear I saw stars when I easily found my release. Chase’s body shuttered against me and he dropped down to his elbows, hovering over me. He placed one last soft kiss on my lips before curling his body around mine and we both drifted off to sleep, completely satisfied for the first time in a long while.
Chapter 17
Chase
I woke up and reached out for Leah to pull her small body back against mine, but my hand just found empty space. I switched on the lamp and saw that it was almost noon. I had needed that sleep with my wife.
I couldn’t stay at my mom’s house any longer last night, knowing that I had left Leah the way I did. I tiptoed out of the house in the middle of the night and made my way home. I ran a few thousand different scenarios through my head on the way there. Was she going to be pissed and tell me to get the hell out? Or would she just lay there and ignore me?
What I got instead, surprised the shit out of me, but it was probably one of the best answers I could have gotten. We had reconnected in a way that was so special; I knew I had gotten a little piece of my Leah back. Now I would just have to see what he
r attitude would be like this morning.
I pulled on a pair of shorts and opened up the bedroom door, on the search for Leah. When I smelled something cooking, I immediately ran into the kitchen, sure that something was on fire. Instead, I found an even more shocking sight.
My wife, looking sexy as hell in one of my T-shirts, just reaching passed the curve of her ass, leaning over the stove cooking breakfast. If last night hadn’t baffled the shit out of me enough, this was really sending my head into a whirlwind, but I wasn’t going to mess anything up. My lips were sealed.
I pulled out a mug and poured myself a cup of coffee before sliding out a barstool and watching Leah while she cooked. I swear she was purposely bending over more than necessary just for my benefit. I bit on my lip to keep a laugh from escaping. If she wanted to put on a show, I was all for it.
“Here you go.” She set down a plate that was piled high and then sat down a matching one in the spot next to mine. If I had known sex would make her feel better, I would’ve tried it a lot sooner.
“Aren’t you going to eat?” She paused in between mouthfuls of food and looked at me. I hadn’t even lifted my fork yet, I was actually in awe of my wife eating. How fucked up was that?
“Yeah, baby. Just glad to see you eating something more than crackers. This all looks great.” We ate our late breakfast in silence until Leah’s phone rang from the bedroom and she got up briefly to answer it.
I took the opportunity to rinse my plate and call my mom to check up on Caleb. I told her about Leah’s change of mood, even though I wasn’t going to tell her why she had such a change of mood. She was happy and relieved to hear about it, but suggested that I still brought up counseling. I knew I had to, but I really didn’t want to piss her off when she was in such a good mood.
Leah quietly walked back into the kitchen and sat next to me, but pushed her half-eaten plate away, staring down at the counter silently.
Limitless (Journey Series) Page 9
