Jason

by Feyna Blackwell

  He opened his mouth to speak, but the words vanished as she stroked her fingers along his chest. The warmth of her skin against his, the tenderness in her touch... He was in heaven. For so long he had craved the touch of a woman who saw past his ability to father children to the person inside the body. A simple caress from someone who cared about him rather than just how much sperm he could produce. And now, in a place that had humiliated him more than any man should have to endure, he was finally receiving that touch.

  He closed his eyes and focused on the sensation of her hand exploring his torso. Even though her fingers never strayed below his waist, erotic images flooded his mind. Marina naked in bed with him. Marina sighing with pleasure as he explored her exposed body. The two of them coming together and moving in rhythm, each giving as well as receiving.

  Before long, Jason was rock hard. He reluctantly opened his eyes and glanced at Marina. Her cheeks were flushed, her pupils dilated. No way could she deny her arousal any more than he could deny his. The sight of her did almost as much to prepare him as her fingers currently stroking his abdomen.

  Although he was loathe to lose the physical contact, he had no choice. “I’m ready,” he said, his voice sounding low and husky to his own ears.

  “All right.” She withdrew her hand and stepped back.

  As he moved into position, he glanced over his shoulder and found her facing away from him, presumably to give him a bit more privacy. The compassionate gesture nearly did him in. He faced the collection unit and closed his eyes, his mind bringing back his fantasies of a moment ago as he slid into the padded opening. The slick, heated channel gripped him tightly. How would it feel if he were inside Marina instead? His imagination surely didn’t do the reality justice, but he freed his mind to fantasize as he completed his chore.

  Once he finished, Jason braced his hands on the wall before him and lowered his head as he caught his breath. The familiar feelings of humiliation and violation surfaced, but to his surprise, they weren’t nearly as strong as usual. The sense that someone cared about his pain, cared about him, broke through and alleviated some of his suffering.

  If only he could have that caring every day, maybe then he wouldn’t hate his life so much. Maybe he could quit wishing he had been born with a genetic disorder or perhaps never been born at all.

  His breathing normal once more, he stepped back and secured his robe. When he turned around, he found Marina watching him with sympathy shining in her eyes.

  She offered him a small smile. “Thank you for participating in the collection.”

  He longed to touch her, but he didn’t dare. The men were never allowed to touch female facility employees. Doing so in the privacy of her office had been a risk, but here in the open it would be dangerous. Instead, he bowed his head and spoke quietly. “Thank you for coming with me. You made it bearable.”

  Without waiting for a reply, he left the collection floor. Marina’s presence had helped him endure his daily humiliation, but even she couldn’t wash away the lingering disgust and self-loathing. If he were a stronger man, he wouldn’t feel so powerless. But since he wasn’t stronger, he headed for the shower and hoped washing away the scent of what he had done would be enough to get him through until tomorrow.

  2

  “So, can we grant his request?” Marina asked, her gaze on the matronly Dr. Flanders. The woman was in charge of the whole facility and had listened in silence as Marina outlined Jason’s emotional needs and his request for female companionship.

  Dr. Flanders leaned back in her chair and steepled her fingers before her chin. “Well, this is an unusual situation. You say he finds no pleasure in the collection or in the attendants’ preparations?”

  “That’s what he said, and I have no reason to doubt him. After witnessing him before, during, and immediately after his participation in the collection, I would have to say that it is akin to torture for him.”

  “Perhaps if we enlarged the channel in his collection unit...”

  Marina shook her head. “No, it wasn’t physical pain I witnessed. He’s hurting emotionally. As he told me, he feels as though we view the men as cattle to be milked. Although he spoke of wanting to have sex with a woman, everything he said indicated what he really wants is the emotional companionship a woman could provide.”

  “I see.” Dr. Flanders rose and paced her spacious office, finally stopping beside the bank of windows overlooking the landscaped grounds. After a moment, she turned toward Marina. “You know more about his mental state than I do at the moment. Do you believe time alone with a woman is in his best interest?”

  Marina had pondered that same question since watching Jason leave the collection floor. The memory of the gratitude in his eyes when he told her she had made the collection process bearable tore at her heart and gave her an answer.

  “I think he needs time with a woman who can show him kindness and caring. Otherwise, he is likely to grow progressively more rebellious and perhaps become violent in his attempts to avoid participating in the collection.”

  “I can’t grant him regular access to a woman. It would have to be on a trial basis and within certain bounds.”

  “Of course.” Hope filled Marina. “But you will give him time with a woman at least once?”

  “Yes, and then we will have to evaluate the effect it has on his morale.” Dr. Flanders returned to her desk and picked up her tablet. “We’ll also have to monitor his output. If his sperm count drops or he provides smaller amounts than he has been, we will have to prevent him from spending time with a woman. We can’t risk the human race because one man is feeling lonely.”

  “I understand.” Despite Dr. Flanders’s dire warnings, Marina had a feeling they would see immeasurable benefit to allowing Jason a female companion. Perhaps this would change the way the men were cared for and more attention would be given to their emotional needs.

  “Good, because you will be the one to provide T985 with his female companionship.”

  “What?” Marina stared at the doctor, startled. “Where am I going to find a woman for him? I supervise the collection, not the women in the breeding program.”

  “You misunderstand me. You won’t be selecting a woman for him. You will be his female companion.”

  The room’s oxygen vanished. Marina finally drew in enough of a breath to speak, although her heart still pounded. “Me? Why?”

  “You have developed a rapport with him, he responds positively to you, and by your own admission, he finds your presence beneficial.” Dr. Flanders worked on her tablet a moment longer, and then laid it on her desk. “Tomorrow, once the day’s collections are complete, you will take T985 to your apartment and keep him with you all night. You are to do whatever he asks and make sure he has a positive experience.”

  “But, Dr. Flanders—”

  The older woman lifted a disapproving eyebrow. “You are the one who brought this situation to my attention and suggested a solution. Are you irresponsible enough to resist helping to solve the problem? Because if you are, perhaps you should find a different line of work.”

  Marina straightened her shoulders, indignation burning through her. “Are you threatening to fire me if I refuse to sleep with T985?”

  “Of course not. I am merely suggesting that you might be more comfortable with another employer should you refuse to take T985 into your home for one night.”

  “I see.” Even a deaf bat couldn’t miss a threat that large.

  “Good.” Dr. Flanders had the audacity to smile. “Then tomorrow you will let T985 know of his overnight stay with you.”

  Marina endured a list of instructions on what was and wasn’t allowed, as well as how she was to conduct herself. Essentially, she had to do whatever Jason wanted and do it cheerfully. The thought scared and exhilarated her. She couldn’t deny her attraction to him, and with all the images and videos he had been exposed to over the years to aid him in preparing for each day’s collection, he had undoubtedly picked up a few ideas
to use on a lover. His belief that he could bring pleasure to a woman indicated his confidence in his skills, untried though they were.

  But despite all of the exciting possibilities, her own past wouldn’t stay out of her mind. She had shared a brief marriage with a man who had preferred his women younger, more voluptuous, and less intelligent. Marina’s independent nature and the fact that she wouldn’t bow to his every whim had grated on him. Their lovemaking had been more like an unpleasant chore for Marina, who never heard a compliment or received any encouragement. According to the tyrant, she had been barely adequate to call herself a woman and had left a lot to be desired in bed and every other part of the marriage. To her relief, he had divorced her after six months, but the damage to her self-esteem had already been done.

  While she knew she excelled professionally, personal relationships scared her. What if she wasn’t good enough for Jason? What if the tyrant’s opinion hadn’t been wrong? Maybe she really did suck as a lover, which would make pleasing Jason difficult, if not downright impossible. Then again, he had seemed pleased with her in her office, and he had gotten aroused quite quickly when she stroked his chest and abdomen.

  Her conflicting thoughts and flipping emotions kept her a nervous wreck all night. By the time she arrived at her office above the collection floor the next morning, she’d decided she had no choice but to take Jason to her apartment and hope for the best. The worst that could happen was that she lost her job. She hoped it would go much better than that, however. With any luck, she could make Jason happy, which in turn would make Dr. Flanders happy and possibly get Jason the regular female companionship he seemed to crave.

  * * * *

  Jason followed the other men down the hall toward his daily humiliation and wished he knew if his request for time with a woman had been granted. He had waited all night and most of the day to hear something, anything, from Marina, but there had been no message. Given the facility’s penchant for ignoring requests of an emotional nature, he figured no news meant his request had been denied. He couldn’t blame Marina, however. She had shown too much kindness and caring for him to believe she wouldn’t do everything in her power to get him permission to have female companionship.

  As soon as he stepped onto the collection floor, one of the guards grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the line. A burly man with some kind of disorder that disqualified him from being a sperm donor, the guard glared at Jason.

  “Come with me.”

  “Why should I?” Jason tried to jerk his arm out of the man’s grasp, but the guard only tightened his hold.

  “Because I said you have to. Now, don’t fight me. I’m not in the mood to deal with it today.” The guard dragged him toward the stairs leading to Marina’s office.

  A sudden flash of fear had Jason wondering if he was going to be punished for the trouble he had caused yesterday. As far as he knew, no man in the history of the collection center had put up a fight the way he had. Marina had seemed more concerned with getting him past his resistance than the fact that he had resisted in the first place, but maybe one of the higher-ups had insisted on punishment to prevent any of the other men from getting rebellious ideas.

  At the top of the stairs, the guard knocked on the closed office door.

  “Come in,” Marina called, her voice full of cool efficiency.

  Jason’s heart dropped as the guard opened the door. Had he read her wrong yesterday? She had seemed so warm and caring. Or maybe he had read her right and just pushed her too far. Either way, he had a feeling participating in the collection would be preferable to facing her.

  The guard dragged him before her desk, and Jason glanced up to find her seated in the chair behind it. She briefly met his gaze, and then looked past him to the guard.

  “Thank you. You may go.”

  The guard left, closing the door behind him, and Jason shifted uncomfortably. At least there wouldn’t be a witness to the delivery of his punishment, but he wished he didn’t have to go through it at all. Especially not from Marina.

  “Please sit down,” she said, her voice slightly warmer than it had been when she spoke to the guard.

  Jason dropped into the chair in front of her desk and risked looking at her again. She didn’t look like a woman about to deliver punishment. In fact, she appeared rather nervous, straightening objects on her desk that didn’t need straightening and her eyes darting about. Her flushed cheeks interested him, relieving some of his fear and reminding him of how she had looked while helping prepare him for the collection. Perhaps this visit had nothing to do with yesterday’s rebellion at all.

  Finally, she met his gaze. “Jason, I spoke with Dr. Flanders about your request.”

  He forced his mind past the sound of his name rolling off her tongue and focused on the rest of the statement. Dr. Flanders was the head honcho of the collection center, if he remembered correctly. “What did she say?”

  “She agreed to allow you to have tonight with a woman. Anything beyond that will have to wait until she can evaluate the effects this evening has on you.”

  He couldn’t help a laugh. “So even in getting time with a woman, I’m still a lab animal.”

  “Consider yourself a pioneer.” Marina leaned forward. “If all goes well, you may get regular time with a woman. Before Dr. Flanders can make a final determination on that, however, she must consider all the factors in the situation.”

  “Such as whether I’ll still let myself be milked.” He should have known it wouldn’t be a simple matter of providing what he needed emotionally.

  “Among other things, yes. Your continued cooperation will be taken into consideration.”

  “I see.” Jason leaned back in his chair and blew out a breath. Despite the scientific experiment feel to the whole situation, he was thankful to finally have permission to spend time with a woman who wouldn’t treat him like an emotionless robot. Or would she? “Who is the woman I’m spending the night with?”

  Marina blushed and gave a couple of false starts, something he found intriguing from such a confident woman. After a moment, she sat back and spread her arms. “You’re looking at your female companionship for the night.”

  “What?” If he hadn’t already been sitting, he would have collapsed into the chair. Not only was he getting time with a real woman, he was going to spend it with the woman who had given him pleasant dreams all night long? “Are you serious?”

  “Yes, I am.” She drew in a breath and slowly exhaled as she folded her hands on the edge of her desk. “After you finish today’s collection, you will come back up here. Then, once I am free to leave, we will go to my apartment for the night. Everything you need will be provided, and I’ll bring you back here in the morning.”

  “Wow.” Jason fought to control his breathing and calm his heart rate. He couldn’t let Marina know yet that she had made his dreams come true with her announcement.

  “Yes.”

  She straightened her desk once more, and he realized her nerves were caused by knowing he was spending the night with her. He felt a burst of compassion for her and knew that he would have to ensure she enjoyed their time together as much as he did.

  She looked up at him, appearing fully in control of her emotions once more. “Now, you must go downstairs and participate willingly.”

  A small smile touched her lips, and Jason knew he wouldn’t have any trouble preparing for the collection today. He rose and reached across the desk. Stroking his fingers across the soft skin of her cheek, he leaned close and whispered, “That won’t be a problem, since I know that once I finish I’ll get to see you again.”

  He left her office, feeling her gaze burn into his back, sending welcome warmth and desire through his veins. Thinking about her was sure to prevent the need for the attendant to help prepare him, and thoughts of the coming evening would give him the strength to get through the collection.

  When he arrived at the open collection unit, an unfamiliar attendant waited. She wasn’t as old as
most of them, which meant she might be easier to deal with. The newbies tended to be less cold, although he had come across a few whose inexperience made them more difficult to bear.

  As he stepped into the booth, she stepped directly behind him. Definitely a newbie, since all the other attendants knew to stand to the side so they were easier to see. That position also made it easier for them to do their jobs.

  Jason took a calming breath, fighting back the rising anxiety of not being able to see the attendant, even when he turned his head slightly. “Could you move a couple of steps to the right?”

  “Oh, of course.” She appeared in his line of sight. “What’s your number?”

  “T985.” He faced front again and waited for her to punch in the code to prepare the unit. Each man had different settings designed to make the channel as comfortable as possible during the collection. The codes also let the computer know which images and videos to cue up, based on each man’s preference. Lately, Jason hadn’t wanted anything, since the visuals had started making him feel nauseated. Although others still enjoyed what the vid screens displayed, he couldn’t take any more. Not after ten years of daily exposure to it for the sole purpose of preparing him for a task he hated.

  He untied his robe, his thoughts straying to the coming evening with Marina. The beginnings of arousal were instantaneous as he allowed himself to remember the way she had touched him the previous day.

  The vid screen flared to life, interrupting his preparations. A naked woman with two equally naked men appeared, and Jason looked away before he could decipher exactly what was happening. Threesomes had never been his thing.

  Fighting irritation, he looked over his shoulder at the waiting attendant. “Turn that off. I specifically requested no images or video.”

  “I’m sorry.” She pressed a button and the screen went dark. “They’re updating the system. It must have caused a glitch in your preferences.”

  “Make sure it doesn’t happen again.” Jason closed his eyes and wished for a competent attendant. He drew in a calming breath and focused once more on Marina’s image in his mind. The fantasies he’d had yesterday came to life, and he began to harden. His dreams from last night flowed through his mind, sending even more blood racing to his groin.