Now or Never

by A. J. Bennett

  “I told you they are all dogs.” Luna smirked. “I’m right once again.”

  Grayson was surprised to feel a bit of disappointment at the news. But she knew they were right. The last thing she needed was to start a relationship with someone, let alone a friend of her brother’s with a reputation for being a playboy. That would be weird in more ways than one.

  Mom came through the door. Her crazy curly hair looked alight like fire with the sun behind her. “There is way too much testosterone out there for me. Need any help in here?”

  Heather smiled warmly. “That would be great!”

  Grayson and Luna used that as their cue to escape back outside.

  Grayson spent the rest of the evening avoiding Derrick. She had succeeded, until she came out of the bathroom after dinner. She wasn’t paying attention and nearly slammed into him.

  He grabbed her to steady her. His hand on her arm caused her breath to catch in her throat, her skin warming beneath his touch. Instantly, she was annoyed. Why did he have such an effect on her? Heather’s warning echoed in her head.

  His stance was casual, but there was nothing casual about his smile. It was intimate, sensual and seductive. Jesus, he barely touched her and she felt as if an electrical charge had passed between them. The sexual tension was palpable.

  “Small world,” he said, dropping his hand after lingering longer than necessary.

  She was bewildered by this man and the sense of loss she felt when he removed his hand. “Very.”

  “You never called.” He was standing so close, his warm breath on her face, his smell intoxicating.

  She stepped back, needing to get away from him to get some air. She felt completely unbalanced around him. It was disturbing.

  In the back of her mind, she was appalled at her thoughts. She wanted to know what his lips would feel like on hers. A mental image of his hands on her bare skin, caressing her neck and moving slowly down to her breast flashed through her mind. Somehow she managed to speak. “You heard my brother. I’m off limits.”

  He gave her a crooked grin and his intense eyes bore into hers, causing her pulse to race. “I seldom follow rules.”

  “So I hear.” Her heart thumped loudly in her ears.

  Eyebrow raised, Derrick remarked, “Oh really? And just what have you heard exactly?”

  “Just that you’re quite the ladies’ man, and I should steer clear of your womanizing ways.”

  “Interesting. Well then, I won’t keep you.” He brushed past her and went into the bathroom, the door shutting smartly behind him.

  Grayson cringed. Well, that wasn’t what she expected. Grayson released a shaky breath. She was surprisingly annoyed that he hadn’t tried harder.

  Oh well, if he was going to give up that easily, he probably wasn’t worth her time or energy.

  CHAPTER 13

  Grayson made it through an uneventful week functioning on automatic. She’d put in a few applications around town, but so far she hadn’t heard anything back. Her mother insisted she didn’t need to help with the bills, but Grayson felt like she was mooching off of her mom; she was too proud and loved her mother too much to use her like that. Hopefully, something would turn up soon so she could feel slightly more independent again.

  It’d been a week since her one-night stand, and Grayson was still surprised she’d gone through with it. She sat on the couch, surfing through the channels as she congratulated herself on escaping another night out on the town with her crazy sister. However, she spoke too soon—just before nine, the door burst open and Luna sashayed into the house.

  With her hand on her hip in her usual dramatic flare, she glared at Grayson. “You’re not even ready?”

  “Excuse me? What exactly should I be ready for?” Grayson sighed and clicked off the TV, setting the remote control on the end table.

  “Seriously, do I always have to spell everything out for you?” At Grayson’s blank stare, Luna crossed her arms and huffed. “It’s Thursday night…ladies’ night.”

  “And your point Luna? I know we’re twins, but we both know that the ‘twins can read each other’s minds’ concept is bull.”

  “My point little sister is that you need to get your ass up and get dressed. You can’t lounge around in your pajamas all the time; you’re starting to make me depressed.”

  “I don’t feel like going out,” Grayson argued. “Let’s just stay in and watch a movie. We can pig out on popcorn just like old times.”

  Luna rolled her eyes and shook her head in disgust. “Seriously, how can you look so much like me and yet be so lame?”

  Narrowing her eyes, Grayson snapped, “Thanks.”

  Mom walked in from the kitchen, drying her hands with a towel. Even in her fifties, their mother still had an impish beauty about her; seemed to be eternally young. “You know I hate to agree with Luna,” she remarked, ignoring the face Luna made, “but I think she’s right. You need to get out, Grace. All of your moping is bringing me down too.”

  Grayson’s head snapped towards her mother. “Great, now I have both of you teaming up on me?”

  “You’re only young once Grace. Learn to enjoy it before it passes you by and you’re my age.” Mom tossed the towel at Grayson, who failed to catch it before it hit her cheek.

  “Ok, fine.” Grayson sighed. They were probably right. She wasn’t moving on and starting a new life if she was sitting on the couch all day, watching nonsense on TV. It was time she got back out there, no matter how much she really didn’t want to.

  Damn it.

  “Yes!” Luna grinned from ear to ear. “Thanks, Mom.”

  “I didn’t do it for your entertainment, love.” She winked at Luna. “If you guys need a ride home, call me. I don’t want any DUIs or accidents, and I especially don’t want to get a collect call from jail.”

  “We’ll take a cab if we need to,” Luna agreed. “But don’t wait up Mom. Grayson is going to stay at my place tonight.”

  “I am doing what?” Grayson had only been to her sister’s little studio once. There wasn’t exactly room for her to sleep over, which meant she would probably be sharing her sister’s futon. Just like when they were little and shared a room. The idea almost sounded fun, almost.

  Luna held out her hand. “Come on, get your ass up.”

  One of these days, Grayson would firmly say no and deal with the fallout later. Unfortunately, today would not be that day. She took her sister’s offered hand and let Luna pull her off the couch.

  “Get dressed.” Luna pushed Grayson a few steps forward.

  “I need to shower.” Grayson trudged down the hallway to her mom’s spare room where her clothes were stashed away. She pulled out a pair of jeans and an off-white long john shirt. It was snug fit, well worn and one of her favorites. Luna would disapprove, but she’d get over it. In record time, Grayson was showered, dressed and ready to go.

  She was taking one last look in the mirror when the phone rang. Her mom had a habit of ignoring it, so Grayson grabbed it off the cradle without much thought.

  “Hello?”

  “Grayson?” Josh’s deep voice came across the line.

  She nearly dropped the phone. “Josh,” she stammered, her heart nearly leaping from her chest.

  “What the hell? Why did you leave like that? I’ve been going crazy looking for you. I even called the cops.”

  His heavy breathing crossed the line, making her stomach roll. She gripped the phone tighter, so irritated that her palms got all sweaty.

  “Grace?” Luna appeared at the doorway, face questioning.

  Josh went on. “You could have at least replied to one of my messages, so I knew you were still alive.”

  Grayson turned around so her sister couldn’t see her face. “I’m fine, Josh. I just had to get out of there.”

  There was a short pause, and then he said, “I’m coming for you.”

  The hairs on the back of her neck stood up. “Don’t waste your time. We’re over, I’m not coming back.”


  “Please, Grayson. I just want to see you.” His voice cracked. “I’m spiraling without you. You were the only thing that held me together.”

  It was the crack in his voice that pissed her off the most. He could play the role of an apologetic boyfriend perfectly, down to drawing up tears.

  “Sorry, Josh,” Grayson snapped. “I can’t be your crutch anymore.” She slammed the phone down and took a deep breath, trying to compose herself before turning to her sister.

  Luna opened her mouth to speak, but the phone started ringing again.

  “Don’t answer it!” Grayson yelled down the hall.

  “I’m surprised it took him so long to find you,” Luna said softly.

  Grayson took a deep breath, realizing her fists were clenched, and slowly peeled her fingernails away from her skin. “Mom said he’s been calling. I totally flaked. I shouldn’t have answered the phone. Now he knows I’m here.”

  “Let’s just get out of here.” Luna turned and led the way.

  They hurried out to Luna’s car, a little two-door sports coupe in cherry red. Grayson settled into the passenger seat, and slammed her head into the headrest a couple of times. She was so annoyed with herself.

  “Are you that worried about Josh?” Luna asked, concerned.

  Grayson shrugged. “I doubt he’ll really come here.” But, inside, she really was freaked out about it. She knew he would cross the country if he thought he could get her back. Grayson was seriously considering making a move to another state. She’d only planned on coming to Tennessee temporarily anyway.

  As Luna turned the key in the ignition, Grayson spoke. “We could always move somewhere together. We could go anywhere. You always said you wanted to go to New York City.”

  Luna turned and stared at her for a long moment; her blue eyes clouded with concern. “Grayson, you’re scared of him. I don’t need twin telepathy to know that.”

  She started to deny it, but knew it was useless. Her twin knew her better than she knew herself. “Yeah, a little I guess. He’s just really possessive and jealous.”

  Luna didn’t back out of the driveway. Instead, she appraised her for a long moment. “You’re not telling me everything. I’ve never seen you scared of someone before, so I know there’s a reason behind it.”

  Grayson didn’t respond. She didn’t want to admit to Luna exactly what life had been like in Arizona. She didn’t want to admit she’d been so weak.

  “We could always tell Ethan and let him take care of it,” Luna said seriously.

  “I don’t want to drag Ethan into my pathetic love life.”

  “You know that’s not what I meant.”

  Grayson tugged on a strand of her sister’s hair. “If he shows up, I’ll call Ethan. Okay?”

  Luna nodded and leaned over to give her a half-hug. “You need a drink.”

  “Or three,” Grayson agreed. Today was not turning out quite like she expected.

  “Where are we going?” Grayson asked as they hit the road.

  “There’s a pub downtown. You’ll love it; it’s small, they make the best drinks, and of course there will be hot guys.”

  As Luna rambled, Grayson tried to get into the mood, but it didn’t quite happen. She wanted to turn around and go home where she could try to piece together what to do next. Just hearing Josh’s voice was enough to send her over the edge. Why couldn’t he just let her go? She would be so embarrassed if he came to her mother’s and made a scene.

  Plus, the way her hands shook proved she was more scared of him than she dared to admit.

  Tonight just wasn’t going to happen, Grayson told herself. She wasn’t quite up to another one-night stand so soon after the last one. She’d sit this one out and watch her sister have fun. That would be enough for her.

  CHAPTER 14

  Just as Luna had promised, the bar was small and Grayson liked it immediately. A single pool table took up a back corner, surrounded by a group of quiet guys gripping beer bottles and whiskey glasses. A wrap-around bar was hidden in the corner, flanked by dozens of tall round tables and stools. No dance floor, but a jukebox played a loud Nine Inch Nails song and flashed neon lights.

  There weren’t nearly as many people here as the first bar where she’d met Todd. It was a mixture of guys and girls, and no one seemed to pay Grayson or Luna much attention, which was refreshing. To say being with her twin usually made it hard to blend in was an understatement.

  Grayson followed close behind her sister, who propped her elbows on the bar and flashed the bartender her winning smile as she ordered for the both of them.

  “Don’t worry—it will pick up soon,” Luna said, offering Grayson her glass. “I wanted to get here early so we can watch them arrive.”

  Grayson accepted the drink with a surreptitious eye roll. Her sister was such a drama queen. But people watching was something she could handle, even enjoy.

  About twenty minutes later as Grayson and Luna chatted at a table, the first round of rowdy guys arrived. They seemed younger than the military guys, not to mention they all had shaggy hair and were trailed by a group of girls, mostly dressed like they were going clubbing. They didn’t seem to fit in with the laid-back scene of the bar.

  “College kids,” Luna explained, seeing Grayson’s raised eyebrow. “They come here to get wasted before going round to the clubs. The drinks are cheaper at this bar.”

  “There’s a college nearby?” Grayson asked, intrigued. If that was the case, she could look into taking classes—if she decided to stay, anyway.

  “Yep. There is one right down the road.”

  “Is it a good one?”

  Luna laughed. “I don’t know. You’re such a weirdo Grayson.”

  They talked about an hour more, and Grayson was ready to call it a night, when the door slammed open. A group of men entered the bar—Derrick among them.

  Grayson groaned out loud. Why did they keep crossing paths? The town was not that small. She watched as he scanned the room, and his eyes settled on hers. His expression didn’t change. He stared a beat too long, and then followed the others to the bar.

  “Isn’t that the coffee shop guy?” Luna asked; her lips quirked into a grin as she went on. “And Marcus?”

  “Yep. What are the chances?”

  “Pretty good, actually. This is the main bar where team guys hang out. I found out about it from Ethan.”

  Grayson fought the urge to groan again. This was all Luna’s fault. “Can we go somewhere else? This isn’t exactly a happening place.”

  “Patience.”

  “Didn’t you tell me not to get involved with any local guys?”

  “And you won’t. Out-of-towners come here, too.”

  Sighing, Grayson asked, “How can you tell which is which?”

  “Easy. Team guys come in small groups like that. Locals are loners sitting around the bar drowning their sorrows. Out-of-town guys travel in packs.”

  “Interesting. You always were the observant one.”

  “Speak of the devil.” Luna took a swig from her beer as at least twenty guys filed into the bar. The noise level rose instantly.

  Grayson snuck a peek at Derrick and was surprised to feel her blood boil when she saw a blonde girl sitting next to him, laughing at something he’d just said.

  Grayson tore her gaze away and tapped her nails on the side of her glass.

  The waitress set two drinks on the table and turned to point at the bar. “The guy with the baseball hat sent them.”

  Grayson looked at him; he was pretty big, close to six foot and stocky. She could feel Derrick’s eyes on her. Picking up the beverage, she smiled at the large man before taking a drink.

  Within minutes, the guy in the baseball hat and one of his friends were sitting across from them at their table. Grayson tried to keep up with the conversation, but she kept glancing over at Derrick. Several times their eyes met, but he didn’t come over or even bother to acknowledge her with a wave. The blonde was glued to his side, th
ough he didn’t seem to be too into her. He seemed more interested in what was happening at her table.

  Now that excited her, more than she was willing to admit.

  When their eyes met for what felt like the tenth time, Grayson excused herself to the restroom. She stopped by Derrick’s table on the way. “Hey, Marcus.”

  “Hello, Ethan’s incredible hot sister who is off-limits to us. Times two.” He grinned.

  Grayson laughed. “Where is my big brother anyway?” She snuck a peek at Derrick.

  Beside him, the blonde narrowed her eyes and draped an arm over Derrick as if staking her claim. Without missing a beat, he picked up her arm and put it back down on the table. The girl looked like she was about to blow a gasket.

  “He doesn’t come out too often,” Derrick responded. “He’s a family man and all that. Who’re your friends?” He tilted his head towards the table where Luna flirted with their guests.

  “No idea.” Grayson shrugged and continued towards the bathroom. Her heart was pounding against her chest. What the hell was it about that guy that caused her heart to go into overdrive?

  She used the bathroom quickly, and stared at herself in the mirror as she washed her hands. An image of Derrick’s eyes and sardonic smile was burned into her, and she couldn’t shake him. It was one meeting in a cafe, and he made her come unglued. She needed to pull herself together.

  She dried her hands and wrapped her hair into a bun before she stepped outside.

  Derrick stood waiting for her, and she wasn’t really surprised. She took him in. Like before, he looked strong and confident. He was wearing a button down plaid shirt rolled up over his powerful forearms and tan cargo pants. He looked like he belonged in one of those outdoor magazines. Once again, she had a flash of his hands on her body, and she forced her eyes back to his face.

  “You really should be careful around strange men.” His voice was passive, but ran with an undercurrent of something she couldn’t decipher.

  “Oh? Like yourself, you mean?”

  He took a step closer. Her pulse raced. Was he going to kiss her? She couldn’t believe how badly she wanted him to. Instead, he reached around and undid her bun, allowing her hair to fall around her shoulders.