Blue Christmas (The Moody Blue Trilogy | Book One)

by Moody, Diane

  “Oh Jackson . . .” Her tears gave way as she walked to his side, leaning over to hug him. They were silent for a moment. She felt Alli’s hand on her back. Finally, she laughed out of pure joy. “I was so happy when I heard the news.”

  His eyes shone bright and a little moist as well. “Yeah, me too,” he quipped. She laughed again then turned to Alli who hugged her hard, laughing through her own tears.

  Hannah pulled back, wiping her eyes. “This is just so amazing. I’ve never seen such a miracle in my entire life. Jackson, how are you feeling? Are you really okay?”

  “I’m feeling good. It’s like every hour I feel a little stronger,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Everybody has been incredible around here. Do you believe all this?” He waved his hand across the massive sea of flowers.

  “Hannah, you wouldn’t believe it,” Alli jumped up. “There are flowers here from all over the world! Look at this gorgeous bouquet. It’s from Elton John! There must be three dozen roses in there!” She continued around the room, pointing to various arrangements. “These are from Sting, and this ficus tree is from Will and Jada Smith. Do you believe that? And look—these iris are from Julia Roberts. Aren’t they beautiful?

  “But this is my favorite—check out this card.”

  Hannah noticed the royal imprint on the card. She slid the card out and read the enclosed note aloud. “‘Best wishes for a full recovery. Sincerely, William and Kate.’ Are you serious? Wait—did he sign this himself?”

  “Yeah, we’ll be putting that up on eBay by the end of the day.” Jackson smirked.

  Alli playfully swatted him. “No we will not! This one goes in our scrapbook, thank you very much. Along with pressed flowers from the arrangement. Imagine, Will and Kate sending flowers? He is so fine.”

  “Excuse me?” Jackson protested.

  “Sorry, babe. But he’s royalty. What can I say? Oh, and Hannah—look at this poster Jay Leno sent over. It was taken of him and the guys about a year ago when Blue played the Tonight Show.” Hannah noticed the hand-written message on the lower end of the poster: Prayers & best wishes, Jay.

  “That is so—”

  “Yeah, yeah, but show her my favorite,” Jackson interrupted.

  “Oh yeah.” Alli leaned behind the desk and pulled out a large box. Inside was a basketball autographed by Michael Jordan. “Isn’t this incredible?”

  “You better keep your eye on that one,” Gevin warned. “I’ve already had some interest on it on eBay.”

  “You touch it and you’re history,” Jackson teased.

  “Well, Jackson, it looks like you made out pretty good, all things considered,” Hannah said, taking a seat on the other side of Jackson’s bed.

  “Not too shabby, I guess. But this is all I really care about, to tell the truth.” He reached for Alli’s hand. “They told me she never left my side, except maybe when they changed my diapers.”

  “You weren’t wearing diapers. How many times do I have to tell you that?”

  He tried to sit up taller, and grimaced at the effort.

  “Are you okay?” Hannah asked.

  “He’s still really tender where the wound is. I keep telling him to take it easy, but that’s pretty much a waste of my time.”

  “Jackson, did you remember what happened that night?” The question slipped out before Hannah realized it. She studied her hands, avoiding his eyes. When she heard no response, she looked up again.

  Jackson looked at Alli, giving her a tired smile. “I’m afraid so. Not entirely at first, but it came back to me. I still can’t believe it. I was really worried about Sergio, but we had a good talk earlier. It’s gonna take some time, but I think he’ll be okay. I’ve slept through all this, but it’s still so fresh for him, y’know?”

  “We’re just glad you’re here. That’s all that matters,” Gevin said.

  “What a month this has been, huh?” Marissa added. “I don’t know about you guys, but I think we could all use some peace and quiet.”

  Hannah looked back to find Alli and Jackson watching her. The concern in their eyes touched her deeply. She felt her face warming.

  “Hannah, are you okay?” Alli asked.

  She knew it was useless to attempt to speak and simply looked up at them again, nodding her head slowly.

  “It’s gotta be so awkward,” Jackson said quietly. “It was such a surprise to hear that—”

  “No, please. I’d rather not talk about it right now, okay?” Hannah answered with a hoarse whisper.

  The silence hung in the air again. Jackson winked at her, expressing more than any words could say. “Just know we’re here for you. Nothing has changed that.”

  “Jackson’s right, Hannah,” Alli said. “Nothing will ever change that. It feels like you’ve been part of our little family here forever.”

  Hannah sat up, taking a deep breath, waving her hand through the air. “I know, I really appreciate—”

  The door swung open and Hannah’s heart stopped. Oh God, please no.

  “Hey! You guys having a party in here? How come we didn’t get an invitation?”

  Hannah let out a sigh as Frank McKenzie strolled in behind Laura.

  “Hey guys,” Jackson welcomed them. “Come on in.”

  Laura bee-lined for Hannah’s side. “Ohhhhh, I was hoping we’d run into you!” She buried her head against Hannah’s, embracing her warmly. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

  “Laura, I’m fine. Really. It’s so good to see you.”

  Frank gave her a hug as well. “We’ve been worried about you.”

  “We need to talk,” Laura whispered maternally.

  “I know . . . we will.”

  Laura smiled with such kindness. Memories of her first night at the McKenzie’s came flooding back.

  The noise level grew as the conversations multiplied. They laughed mostly, the relief so genuine it covered them like a soft blanket. Hannah absorbed it all, loving these people. When thoughts that she might never be with them like this again began to seep into her mind, she shook them off.

  Later, she looked at her watch. She felt the unease creeping back in. Maybe those five or six hours Jason went home to sleep were only two or three? What if he were to show up? She couldn’t risk it. She began to say her good-byes. More hugs. More promises to talk.

  She gave Jackson one final hug. “I’m so glad I got to see you again,” she spoke for his ears only.

  He looked at her quizzically. “Come back soon, okay?” He gave her a long kiss on her cheek. She just smiled, not at all sure that would ever be possible again.

  As she turned to leave, Gevin followed in step behind her. “Hannah, I’ll walk you back to the limo.”

  She said good-bye to everyone then slipped out the door. Gevin rested his arm over her shoulder as they walked. “You know, Hannah, I really think that—”

  “Gevin!”

  They stopped in their tracks. At first Hannah wasn’t sure who had addressed them. The baseball cap and glasses caught her off guard. Then her heart stopped.

  “Uh . . . well, hey Jennifer,” Gevin stuttered. Hannah felt his arm tense against her shoulder.

  “So how’s Jackson? Jason was still asleep so I just called a cab and came back over. He’ll probably sleep for a month after all that’s—”

  “Jackson’s doing great,” Gevin interrupted. “In fact, I’m sure he’d love to see you. So why don’t you—”

  “I’m sorry, have we met?” Jennifer asked Hannah as she pulled off her ball cap. Her long blonde hair fell down on her shoulders. She shook her head and it fell perfectly into place. Of course.

  Hannah took a deep breath, straightening her shoulders.

  “Oh, sorry, Jennifer, I apologize,” Gevin said. “This is—”

  “Hi, Jennifer. My name is Hannah. I’m a friend of . . . Alli’s.” She held out her hand. “We’re friends from way back.” Way back last week.

  There was an uncomfortable pause, then Jennifer’s face broke into a dazzling smil
e. “Oh, don’t you just love Alli? She is so down to earth and so amazing. I can’t imagine what this has been like for her. But how nice of you to be here for her. You all must be very close.”

  Time simply stopped. Hannah watched this remarkable young woman in front of her. She was warm and friendly, her clear blue eyes conveying a depth of character that surprised Hannah. No wonder Jason had loved her. She remembered Christmas Eve, that first night at Jason’s when she’d looked at the gallery of pictures on the McKenzie’s game room wall. The one of Jason with Jennifer. You’d have liked her, he’d said. She’s terrific . . .

  She snapped back to reality, realizing Gevin and Jennifer were waiting for an answer. Problem was, she couldn’t remember the question. “Um, well . . . Jennifer, it was really nice meeting you, but I’ve got to run.”

  Gevin came to her rescue. “I’ll ride with you downstairs, Hannah. Jennifer, just go ahead up to the room, and I’ll see you in a little while, okay?”

  “Sure, Gevin. It was really nice to meet you, Hannah. I hope I’ll see you again sometime.”

  Hannah nodded, producing the best smile she could. She and Gevin walked toward the elevator which opened immediately. They stepped in, turning around as the doors began to close. Jennifer waved at them, disappearing around the corner.

  If only she had been obnoxious. If only she had been some kind of ditzy blonde or arrogant or rude. It would have been so much easier to hate her. To despise her for coming between her and the man Hannah had grown to love. But she was none of those things. In fact, Hannah realized that Jennifer was the kind of person she would be friends with. The thought unsettled her.

  And it grieved her more deeply than she ever could have imagined.

  Chapter 19

  “Since we’re kind of slow right now, Hannah, go ahead and take your break if you’d like.”

  “Okay, Jim. I’ll finish straightening these shelves then go.” The cereal aisle was in shambles when Hannah arrived that morning. Some late night visitors must have ravaged through the selections for their Cocoa Puffs. She only had one small section to go. She reached for a box on the next shelf, but stopped. There on the family-sized box of Wheaties were the smiling faces of JT, Sergio, Jackson, Gevin, and Jason.

  She slowly picked up the box. How had she not noticed it before? She gently ran her hand across their faces, the grief surfacing all over again. She sank to the ground, her mind spinning. Put it back and get back to work. It’s just a stupid picture.

  But she couldn’t help it. She focused on the details. JT’s hair was tinted dark green. Must have been taken long before the holidays. The last time she’d seen him, it was platinum blond and curly on top. Of course with JT, that could all change in a matter of hours. The thought made her smile. What a character he was. Definitely a bull in a china shop as Marissa liked to say.

  She studied Gevin’s picture, wondering what was different. Ah, the goatee. He had a full beard now, closely trimmed. Nice look, Gevin. He was smiling, but it was one of his more serious smiles. She remembered the glow on his face when he told them he and Marissa were engaged.

  Sergio . . . that incredibly warm smile and those dark bedroom eyes. What a sweetheart. I wonder how he’s doing. With Jackson recovering, has he finally been able to get over the haunting of Liza’s attack?

  And Jackson. His boyish grin as precocious as ever. His hair was longer here, the blunt blond locks flowing over his collar. She realized she liked it better the way he wore it now. She thought of Alli and how radiant she looked yesterday at the hospital with Jackson on the road to recovery.

  She finally allowed her eyes to track to Jason’s beaming face. Why did his smile always look so mischievous? Or maybe she just never noticed it until she got to know him. So full of life. So happy.

  Her chest hurt again, the dull ache of her broken heart. She took a deep breath, refusing to allow another invasion of tears. There had been far too many and she was determined never to cry again. Unrealistic perhaps, but the only way she was coping enough to work these days.

  She leaned her head back against the shelf and closed her eyes. Will I ever be able to make it through a single day without this kind of pain? Everywhere I look, I see their faces. On television, on newspapers, on magazine covers . . . on cereal boxes, for crying out loud. Can’t I just make it through one hour without these constant reminders?

  “Excuse me, ma’am, do you know where I could find a bag of rancid cranberries?”

  Hannah looked up into the smiling eyes of Laura McKenzie. “Laura,” she whispered jumping to her feet, hiding the box behind her. She melted in Laura’s embrace. “What are you doing here?”

  “I haven’t been able to get you off my mind for one single minute since I saw you at the hospital yesterday. Are you okay?”

  Hannah pushed her hair back behind her ears. “As okay as I’m going to be for a while, I guess.” She attempted a smile. She watched Laura’s eyes drift to the Wheaties box in her hand. Laura reached for it, a knowing smile spreading across her face.

  “Ah, I see you have good taste in cereal. One of my personal favorites, I might add.”

  “I was just cleaning these shelves and there it was. I hadn’t seen it before.”

  “I must have bought twelve of these boxes. Keeping them sealed, you know. I figured that one of these days my grandkids would want to see their crazy father’s picture on a cereal box.” She stopped, searching Hannah’s face. “Oh Hannah, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean—”

  Hannah took Laura’s hand. “Laura, you don’t have a mean or malicious bone in your body. No need to apologize.”

  “Still, it was a thoughtless thing to say. Look, do you have a few minutes? I’d really like to talk if we could.”

  Hannah looked at her watch. “I was just getting ready to take my break, but I’m not sure this is such a good time. I only have a few minutes and—”

  “A few minutes will do fine. Besides, there’s someone in the car who wants to see you,” Laura smiled playfully.

  Hannah’s eyes grew wide. “Uh . . . I don’t think—”

  “Well for heaven’s sake—there I go again.” Laura shook her head. “Why don’t I just open wide and put both feet in at the same time? Honestly, Hannah. I’m surprised you aren’t kicking me out of here. No, no, it isn’t—well, just come on.” She grabbed Hannah by the hand and started dragging her toward the front of the store. Hannah set the Wheaties box on a shelf as she followed this determined woman.

  Kylie shot her a questioning look as they passed the checkout counter. “Hannah? Where are you—”

  “I’ll be right back. I’m gonna take my break out . . . well, she . . . oh, never mind.”

  As Laura stepped outside in front of her, Hannah could hear Kylie calling after them. “Who is that?”

  The brisk January air and bright sunshine made her blink. Laura held her hand firmly, tugging her along against the chilling wind.

  She heard the yapping even before she saw the tiny little puppy. “Baby!”

  Laura opened the door to her car, careful to make sure Baby wouldn’t jump out. She reached for the squirming puppy finally grasping her in her arms. “Look, Baby! Look who’s here to see you!”

  Hannah reached out, scooping Baby into her arms. After the initial licking and feistiness, the pup settled down, content for Hannah to hold her. Hannah snuggled her close, kissing her miniature head. Baby answered with a quick lick to Hannah’s chin. She smiled at the feel of it. “Hey, girl, how are you?” The dog responded with a howl of delight, her chin jutting straight up in the cold morning air. Hannah and Laura laughed at the sight.

  “Hannah, come on. Jump in. I’ll turn on the heater and we’ll be nice and comfortable.” Hannah followed the suggestion, welcoming the shelter from the wind.

  By the time Baby settled into a cozy nest on Hannah’s lap, the car had warmed considerably. They chattered on about the weather, Frank, Jackson . . . until Hannah grew quiet, afraid where the conversation might be goin
g. Finally, Laura broke the silence.

  “You know things aren’t always as they seem to be.”

  Hannah gazed across at Jason’s mother, curious at the comment.

  Laura continued. “Sometimes we look at a situation and notice the obvious and make conclusions based on that alone.”

  “But—”

  “But God has a way of working in ways we can’t begin to understand. In fact, that’s what He does best. Give him the obvious and—well, somehow I wonder if He isn’t maybe a little bored with the obvious. Where’s the challenge in that? But give Him what seems to be an impossible set of circumstances, then back away and let Him go to work. You never know what will happen.”

  “Laura, what are you trying to say?”

  “Only that it’s wrong for you to turn away and throw in the towel.”

  Hannah shook her head. “You make it sound simple. Like I can just hand all this over to God and everything will work out perfectly.”

  Laura tilted her head to the side and raised one eyebrow. “I suppose it sounds that way because that’s exactly what I’m saying.”

  “But life is more complicated than that, Laura. You and I both know that.”

  “Of course it is. I don’t mean to make it sound like a pie-in-the-sky belief system. But if we truly believe God is who He says He is, then we have to be able to trust Him—not just with the little things in our lives, but the big things as well. The hard things. Just look at what happened with Jackson. Hannah, we almost lost him. Yet I believe with all my heart that God heard our prayers—not just those of us who are close to Jackson but all the thousands of his fans around the world.”

  Hannah looked down at Baby, scratching her gently behind the ears. “I’m so glad he’s okay. I can’t imagine what it’s been like for Alli. For his family. To come so close to losing him.”

  “But Alli never gave up, did she? And Jackson’s family? They never once lost hope. They believed he would come through it and he did.”