Sweetest Heartbreak

by Heather Bentley

  She brings her hands to my face, steering me back to her. “I’d like to call him, make sure he’s okay.”

  When she kisses me at the corner of my mouth and pulls back, I stand my ground. When she does the same to the other corner, my resolve wavers. It’s not until she kisses me full-on, tangling her tongue with mine before pulling back and locking eyes, that I cave.

  “Fine.”

  Between the glide of her tongue against my own and her soft hands on my skin, I’d say yes to anything. I’d give her anything.

  I’m done talking about this. All I want is to drag her down the hall, undressing her as we go. I’m just not convinced she’s ready for that. We’ve barely done more than kiss and I want to do this right, at her pace. The opposite of everything I’ve done before because she’s unlike anyone I’ve ever known before.

  But where to start? A first date? What the hell do guys do on a first date anyway? Dinner. They start with dinner at a nice restaurant. Shit, it’s too late. Besides, she’s settled on top of me, her body resting over mine and warming me from the inside out. Why would I give this up for sitting across from her at a loud, crowded restaurant?

  I run my hand up her arm and watch with greedy pleasure as goose bumps rise over her skin. “Want to order dinner? There’s a great Italian place down the street that delivers.”

  She quirks her lips as her gray eyes darken and her fingers run along the collar of my shirt. “Maybe in a little bit. I’m not all that hungry yet.”

  She’s silently willing me to kiss her, so I do. And, the second before our lips touch, I swear, she smiles.

  The kiss starts slow. I have to force my body to follow suit because, as much as I want to see her under me, I want her there because she wants it, not because I’m taking it.

  I slide my hands up her legs and over her body, registering the feel of her skin and every slight curve along the way—something I’ve never done before now. All the others I’ve been with were all just a means to an end. Not with Leah. With her, I want to memorize everything—from the smoothness of her arms to the firmness of her thighs to the beat of her heart.

  I slide my hand around to the back of her head, burying my fingers in her hair, unwilling to break the kiss as I twist my body over hers, coaxing her to her back before I brace my arm alongside her. Her hand skims my chest and rests on my neck where she wraps her fingers and tightens our connection. I grip the fabric of the sofa with my free hand and lose focus, my mind wandering to all the things I’d like to be doing to her but can’t because I’m worried it’s too soon. I fight with myself to hold back.

  “What’s the matter?” she asks between breaths.

  “Nothing.”

  “Then, why aren’t you touching me?”

  “Because I’m trying to take it slow.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I want to do this the right way. I don’t want to scare you off when I’ve barely had you back.”

  “Heath, just because I don’t have as much experience as you doesn’t mean you can’t touch me. All it means is that there hasn’t been anyone worth touching me in a long time.” Her mouth travels to my ear. “I want you to touch me, Heath. In fact, try to scare me off. I dare you.”

  The little vixen underneath the bun and blazer weakens my willpower and shreds my composure, but I manage to hang on.

  “But this is supposed to be our first date,” I reply teasingly.

  She runs the pad of her finger over my bottom lip. “The way I see it, our first date was right here in this condo, the first time we came to look at it. Our second date was on your basketball court when I beat you playing Jerk—”

  “Which makes this the third date,” I announce with a wicked grin before stealing a kiss. “I like the way you think, Princess.”

  I’m off her and standing before my next breath. I scoop her up, finally, and head for my room.

  Her laughter fills the hall until we make it to the bed, and I playfully drop her with a bounce on to the mattress below. Her legs hang off the end as she watches me pull at the neck of my shirt and yank it over my head. She rises up onto her elbows and her eyes fall to my pants and then back up again.

  “Tell me what you want.”

  She decides to show me, starting by sitting up and reaching for my hips. I move in willingly, aching for what’s coming next. She places a slow, warm kiss above the waist of my pants before undoing my belt and button and tugging them over my hips until they fall to the floor, leaving me in nothing but black boxer briefs. I’d much rather peel every inch of clothing off her body, but we’re playing her game right now. And I’m loving every fucking minute of it.

  I cross my arms at my chest, peering down at her before dragging my eyes from hers to her blouse and then back again. She smiles shyly and reaches for the top button. Then, the next and the next, painfully slow, until she pushes her shoulders back, allowing her navy blouse to cascade down her tan arms.

  I’m rewarded with a black bra trimmed in silver lace, the kind that pushes everything together, creating a deep dip down the middle. Perfect for a shot of tequila.

  Satisfied, I nod to her pants, disappointed that she’ll have to take her shoes off first. They’re simple black heels, but the straps around the ankles is what gets me. I make a mental note to request those for another time—along with the tequila.

  With her shoes tossed aside, she glances up, fighting back a smile, as she deliberately takes her time with the button on her pants. After she lifts her hips and slides the fabric to the floor, she eases her body back to the center of the bed. My patience begins to wane, but my self-restraint is rewarded with the vision in front of me—Leah, in nothing but panties and a bra, lying on my bed with her long hair fanned out around her like a goddess.

  I squeeze my biceps in a weak attempt to ground the urge to hurl myself at her, instead directing my focus on this perfect girl before me. Her hands are splayed low over her stomach, attempting to hide what little she can. I wait for a minute, longer than I’d like, giving her the time she needs to build up the courage to drop them to her side. She’s ridiculous to hide this body. She’s the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever seen.

  As if she can read my thoughts, her arms fall away—her version of a green light. I grip each ankle and spread her legs before my hands travel up her smooth skin. The second my palms make light contact with her thighs, she inhales a deep breath. I continue on my path, putting one knee to the bed and then the other, watching my hands travel higher until my thumbs scrape under the sides of her matching panties.

  I’m in perfect alignment over the silver lace that runs low across her stomach. Her fingers grasp at the comforter and her hips rise ever-so slightly off the bed. If that’s an invitation, I won’t say no.

  I brace an arm on either side of her waist, bending to kiss a line down her stomach until my lips feel the scratch of the lace. I hold steady, letting my breath heat her skin while testing her desire for me to go further. I peek up, and when there’s no signal to stop, I continue my descent until I’m right where I want to be.

  When I place one long, hard kiss over the sheer fabric, her knees trap me at the same time her fingers dive through my hair. She pulls me up for a wild kiss, not hesitating to tangle her tongue with mine, as I grind against her and we moan in sync.

  Her confidence continues to grow as her hand travels down my stomach. When she arrives at her destination, she begins to stroke over the fabric. Between the sight of her below me and the feel of her hand sliding over me, it’s just too much.

  I push her hand aside, gliding my lips down her neck and leaving a trail of heated breaths that cause her skin to prickle. I tug at the straps of her bra, freeing a breast and taking her nipple in my mouth. I suck hard until a soft cry escapes her throat and her hands frantically grab at my hair. I tug the other cup down and do the same, hoping for the same reaction. When I feel the sting at my scalp, I lose another ounce of control. Forcing myself from her grip, I rise up onto my forearms an
d grind into her once, then twice, painfully waiting for permission.

  “Please tell me you have a condom,” she pants as her hands slide lower, digging her nails into my ass.

  I break away, unable to get to my nightstand fast enough, throwing open the drawer and struggling for a second too long as I try to rip one free from the strip. I tear it open and step between her legs, freezing at the sight before me.

  Her panties are gone as she tosses her bra off the bed. I’m expecting her to hide herself again, but she surprises me in the best way. With her eyes locked on mine, she takes a visible breath and lifts one arm up alongside her head, her eyes shooting to my briefs when my dick twitches in anticipation. She looks back up to me before raising her other arm. An offering. I want to tell her how amazing she is, what I know this means for a girl like her, but I don’t want to break the moment. Right now, our silence is speaking for us, and it’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.

  Ridding myself of my boxers, I roll on the condom and make my way over her outstretched body, kissing a trail up her stomach and over her chest as I go, until my fingers entwine with hers and her legs wrap around me. Every instinct in my body is telling me to go hard and fast. But this isn’t about me. It’s about her and, more importantly, what I want this to mean for us.

  I enter achingly slow, pressing my cheek to hers, so the only sound we hear is each other’s steady breaths. When I’m all the way in, I still as a groan from deep within me escapes my chest. She grips my fingers tighter and turns to kiss me, sucking on my tongue and nipping at my lip, making it tough to fight the need to thrust inside her. I’m convinced this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

  She digs her heels into my thighs and expels a pained breath of her own. “Move, Heath. Please move.”

  Thank fuck.

  I release her hands, rushing one of mine down until it’s grabbing her ass and pulling her to me. She doesn’t hesitate to clasp on to my back and dig in, the bite of pain from her nails only causing me to drive harder.

  She lets out a stifled moan and then another. On the third, I know she’s holding back. So, I do the only thing I can do in this moment. I stop, still inside her. She looks at me, brows tense in concern.

  “You’re safe with me, Leah. Always know that. Scream if you want to scream, scratch if you want to scratch. But don’t hold back on me. Ever.”

  Her eyes widen at my words, so I repeat the most important one, “Ever.”

  I don’t give her a chance to overthink what I said. Instead, I kiss her hard, moving again and not letting up. I know I’ve gotten through to her when she pulls her knees up and digs her nails into my ass, harder than before.

  I rise up onto my knees, lifting her hips and driving into her deeper. She grabs her breasts and squeezes as she throws her head back and begins to come. Watching her touch herself, hearing her truly let herself go—it’s the single best moment of my life. I come harder and longer than I have before, in a way I didn’t even know was possible. I’ve never lost myself to a girl before.

  And, with this girl, I’m not just lost. I’m gone.

  Leah

  I wanted to meet with Eli first, alone, so I could have a chance to talk to him about the whole thinking-there’s-still-a-chance thing, but Heath wouldn’t have it. That’s what I’ve come to think of it as. Eli doesn’t have romantic feelings for me. If he did, he wouldn’t have sat back and quietly been my friend for so many years. And, if he truly cares for me—as a friend—then he should have let me have a chance with someone who could make me happy.

  So, here we are, sitting in Heath’s condo, waiting for Eli to show up. Well, Heath’s sitting. I’m pacing, fluffing pillows and wiping down the counters for the third time. I even considered opening a bottle of wine, just a sip or two to take the edge off, but surprisingly, I can’t find a drop of alcohol in this place.

  At the knock on the door, I rush over to it before Heath can even get up. Eli takes a few steps in, and I cave, crushing him with a hug.

  He squeezes me back just as tightly. “I’m sorry,” he whispers in my ear.

  “Me, too.”

  “Ahem.”

  We separate and turn toward Heath. He’s standing with his chin raised and arms crossed at his chest, glaring at Eli. I open my eyes wide and stare, trying to communicate with him a reminder of what we agreed to this morning. No hurting Eli. But he never looks at me.

  “You’re a dick.”

  “I know, man. I’m sorry.” Eli steps away from me, head hung low.

  I hold my breath as he walks closer to Heath. They face off for the briefest moment before reaching out and gripping one another in a one-armed man hug, each finishing with two strong pats to the other’s back.

  “Have you guys eaten lunch?” Eli asks as he takes a seat at the far end of the sofa.

  “No. What should we get? Pizza? Mexican? Who’s playing today? Did you hear Williams got traded?” Heath asks as he takes a seat opposite Eli.

  “Seriously? That sucks. I could go for Mexican. Lee, does that sound good to you?” I’m watching the two of them, stunned silent. “Lee?” Eli says.

  “What just happened?” I look from them, over to the spot where they hugged, then back again in total confusion.

  “What do you mean?” Heath reaches a hand out for me to join him.

  “It’s done? Just like that? We’re all friends again?”

  “Yeah, Lee . . . relax.” Eli clears his throat and smiles his sweet, kind smile. “We’re all friends again.”

  Heath continues to hold his hand out.

  Guys are weird.

  I shake my head and breathe a deep sigh of relief because the drama is over, and more importantly, no blood was shed.

  I don’t take Heath’s hand but move to the seat next to him, close but not touching. I’m still leery of shoving our relationship in Eli’s face. Not one for subtlety, Heath pulls me tight to his side as he and Eli begin to shout and grumble at the game playing on the TV. With the warmth of Heath’s body against my own, his fingers trailing along my hip, I relax. We’re finally all where we’re meant to be.

  Heath leaves to meet the delivery guy, and the second the door closes behind him, Eli slides in next to me, mindful to leave a few inches between us.

  “I’m so sorry, Lee.”

  “Stop apologizing. I feel like an idiot. You’re my best friend, Eli, and I keep thinking I should’ve known how you felt, but why didn’t you ever tell me?”

  “This is all on me. I’ve never been friends with a girl the way I am with you and I made it into something it wasn’t. I love spending time with you and I feel protective over you, but I think I confused that with it meaning something more. Does that make sense?”

  I grip his hand as we both exhale in relief. “Yes. It makes total sense. But are you sure you’re okay with all of this?”

  “All of this?”

  I motion to the condo. “Heath and me. Together.”

  He smiles flatly in understanding. “I’ve just spent weeks without my two best friends, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t miserable. Without you guys, I realized pretty quickly that, if together is the only way I can get you both, then I’ll take it. But, Lee, you need to know something about Heath. I love him like a brother—”

  “I would never hurt him, Eli.”

  “That’s not what I’m worried about.” He takes a deep breath, and I brace. “I said some terrible things to you that day. But what I said about Heath, even though I was mad, is the truth. He’s never been in a real relationship. He’s never cared for anyone more than he cares about himself. And, as good as I know you would be for him, I’m not sure he’ll be the same for you.”

  “I know enough of his history, Eli. But he deserves a chance, and until he proves to me otherwise, I’m going to give it to him. You should, too.”

  He squeezes my hand. “I will, but I won’t be responsible for what I might do to him if he hurts you.”

  “I can promise you, it will nev
er come to that.”

  His mouth flattens in doubt.

  “If or when this thing between us ends, we’ll handle it like adults. But, for now, I like him, Eli. A lot. And, for the first time ever, I want a chance to see where this can go. So, are we good?”

  He moves in, his arms wrapping around my shoulders, and I hug him back.

  “Yeah, we’re good.”

  “Good. Then, there’s only one thing left to do.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Find you a girlfriend.”

  He sits back as a nervous laugh escapes and runs his palms over his thighs. “Actually, my sisters may have set me up on a date”—he pauses—“or two recently.”

  “Eli!” I give him a playful jab in the shoulder. “And?”

  “And not much came of them, but I have another date this weekend with a girl I’ve been talking to lately. She seems pretty cool but it’s nothing serious.”

  He’s blushing like a teenage girl, and I love it.

  Bouncing in my seat, I rattle off the questions I usually reserve for Connor, “What’s her name? Where’d you meet her? Where’s she from? What does she do? How old is she? Does she have a criminal record? Any hairy moles I shouldn’t stare at?”

  Laughing, he raises his hands in defense to my bombardment of questions. “I’ll answer your first question. Her name is Lindsey.” As I open my mouth to beg for more, he covers it with his hand. “And that’s all you’re getting for now.”

  I pout behind his fingers, but he only smiles at my disappointment.

  The door opens, and a second later, Heath walks into the room, two plastic bags hanging from his hands. I leave Eli and go to help, opening containers and grabbing drinks.

  Hidden by the refrigerator door, Heath whispers, “Did I give you enough time?”

  “It was perfect. Thank you.” I give him a quick kiss.

  Seriously, what a thoughtful guy. Eli has nothing to worry about.