Searching for You
Page 16
The frustration coursing through Lyle’s arms radiated into Reinhold. “I don’t have her,” he managed to choke out.
“You’re lying!” Lyle jerked upward, cutting off Reinhold’s breath.
A low flame of anger flickered to life in Reinhold’s gut. His hands fisted, and his muscles twitched with the need to wrap his arms around Lyle’s belly and take him down and pummel him. But Reinhold closed his eyes and forced himself not to move. If he gave life to the fire, if he lashed out, he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to stop, the same way he hadn’t been able to stop when he’d nearly killed Higgins last summer.
“He’s not lying.” Jakob’s wavering voice rang out. “Sophie isn’t here. She’s never been here. Now let him go.”
Lyle’s grip loosened, but he didn’t release Reinhold. “Where is she?”
The accusation in Lyle’s voice sparked inside Reinhold, setting fire to the tinder and rapidly fanning the anger into hot flames. “Let me go!”
“Not until you tell me where she is.”
“We don’t know,” Jakob said, his eyes wide and wild upon Reinhold, as though he realized Reinhold was rapidly losing control and would combust if he didn’t do something to stop it.
His brother’s worry acted as a mirror, revealing how dark and ugly Reinhold was on the inside. Seeing himself as he really was only added loathing to the growing inferno, until Reinhold couldn’t keep it inside.
With a roar, he plowed forward, pushing Lyle until he tripped and fell in the grassy yard. Lyle landed on his back with such force that he released Reinhold.
Reinhold jumped on top of Lyle, pinned him to the ground with his knees, and brought his fist down hard into Lyle’s stomach.
Lyle grunted, then bucked, attempting to dislodge Reinhold.
But Reinhold dug his knees in harder. His anger consumed all his thoughts, driving him to lash out and hurt someone.
“No!” Jakob said from behind. Before Reinhold could bring his fist down again, Jakob grabbed hold of his arm.
Reinhold swiveled and brought his other fist up, making contact with Jakob’s chin. Jakob staggered backward and lost his grip upon Reinhold. He released a startled cry of pain and cradled his chin. Even in the dark, Reinhold could see the blood oozing from the boy’s bottom lip.
The sight of it doused Reinhold’s anger as rapidly as a bucket of water dumped upon a hearth fire. He rolled off Lyle and stood. His chest was tight and heaved with every breath. He couldn’t make himself look at either Lyle or Jakob. He didn’t want to see the reflection of himself, a monster, in their fearful eyes.
“We need to find Sophie,” Jakob said, his voice wavering again.
The mention of Sophie’s name was another bucket of water, this one ice cold against his face. His worst fear had come true. Sophie had run away.
“When did you last see her?” he asked Lyle as his mind spun with a thousand thoughts of where she could have gone and why.
“She must have left after supper tonight.” Lyle slowly picked himself up from the ground. “That’s the last time any of us saw her.”
Reinhold’s anxiety mounted with each passing second until it felt like it would strangle him. Was he the cause? She’d reached out to him at the dance, and he’d turned his back on her and walked away. It didn’t matter that he’d done it to protect her from himself, from the longing he had for her.
Lyle rubbed his hands across his belly in the spot where Reinhold had hit him.
Reinhold looked away, but guilt slugged him in the chest anyway. “Did anything happen that would have made her want to leave?”
“She went to see her little brother and sister earlier in the day,” Lyle replied, “but they weren’t home.”
Reinhold replayed the conversation he’d had with her about the visit earlier in the week, when Mr. Ramsey had insisted Olivia and Nicholas weren’t there. It was too coincidental for them to be gone both times Sophie called. Perhaps Sophie had recognized that as well.
What if she’d gone back to the Ramseys’? And what if this time she intended to find the children and wouldn’t take no for an answer? Even worse, what if Sophie managed to get the children and run away? She’d done it once in New York City under dire circumstances. What was there to prevent her from doing it again? What if she’d already found them and left? How would he be able to find them then?
He started toward the barn at a jog. “I think I know where she may have gone.”
“Where?” Lyle asked.
Reinhold didn’t stop to answer. Instead, he called instructions over his shoulder to his friend. “Go into town and stand vigil at the train station.”
A moment later, as Reinhold hitched Daisy to the wagon, the sound of fading horse hooves told him that Lyle had done as he’d asked.
“I want to ride with you,” Jakob said from the barn door where he’d positioned himself a safe distance away after handing Reinhold the shirt he’d requested.
“No.” Reinhold buckled the final piece of the harness. “Someone has to be home just in case she decides to come here.”
Jakob didn’t protest but watched silently as Reinhold seated himself. Reinhold wanted to apologize, wanted to tell the boy he was sorry not just for hitting him but also for being such a lousy brother. But the words stuck in his throat.
As he started forward, he was surprised when Jakob spoke again. “If anyone can find her, you can.”
Reinhold met his brother’s gaze. By the light of the lantern that Jakob held high to illuminate Reinhold’s path, he could see confidence in the boy’s eyes, a confidence that reached deep into Reinhold’s soul. His brother was offering him grace and love in spite of everything. He didn’t understand why Jakob still cared, why he didn’t hate him.
He nodded at the boy and hoped his eyes conveyed his appreciation and his wish that he could be different, that he could be a better man, that he could be anyone but his father.
At the sight of the boy’s puffy lip still oozing blood, Reinhold swallowed hard against the despair that threatened to undo him. He promised himself he would work harder at becoming the kind of man Jakob could truly admire.
Chapter 13
Sophie strained for the latch, stretching as far as she could on her tiptoes. But the loop was out of reach. The pile of pillows and blankets from Nicholas’s bed wasn’t tall enough to boost her.
“We need something more,” she whispered, staring at the attic trapdoor in the ceiling of the dark hallway, lit only by the faint moonlight in Nicholas’s room.
Nicholas followed her stare. “Daddy uses a ladder.”
Daddy. Sophie bristled at Nicholas’s endearment for Mr. Ramsey. The man was a jailer, not a daddy. How dare he lock Olivia in the attic? What kind of man would do that to a little girl?
She wanted to call up to Olivia, to reassure her that help was on the way, but she couldn’t chance making any more noise.
She returned to Nicholas’s room, searching for anything she could use to raise herself higher. She couldn’t waste time looking for Mr. Ramsey’s ladder. She had to find something else. Here. Now.
“If I’m a bad boy, Daddy said he’d put me in the attic too,” Nicholas whispered next to her, slipping his little fingers into her hand. “I don’t wanna be stuck there. It’s too scary.”
The fear in his voice slashed at Sophie’s heart. “I won’t let him put you in the attic. Just as soon as I get Olivia down, we’re leaving.”
Sophie could sense his hesitancy. He’d said he liked his new mommy, that she sang songs and gave him warm bread. The woman had seemed kind when Sophie was with her, so she could understand why Nicholas might not want to leave her.
But why had Mrs. Ramsey allowed her husband to lock a child of only five years old in the attic? Especially for days? Even if the woman was opposed to such treatment, surely she could have done more to stand up for Olivia.
Sophie had tried to piece together all that had happened. But Nicholas didn’t understand what Olivia had done to d
eserve the punishment, other than that she’d been a bad girl.
Olivia could be strong-willed at times, even quarrelsome. But no matter how the little girl had transgressed, she surely didn’t deserve to stay in a cramped, windowless attic.
Sophie scanned the bedroom again, and her sights landed upon the small pedestal table next to the bed. “We’ll use this little table.” She crossed the room to retrieve it. “You hold the table steady while I stand on top.”
He followed her, but then stopped and shook his head. “Daddy doesn’t let me touch anything. He doesn’t want me to make a mess.”
Was that why the house and yard were so neat and flawless? Because Mr. Ramsey demanded perfection? “You can touch this.”
“But he’ll take away my dinner—”
“I won’t let him.”
Nicholas hung back. His fear fed Sophie’s dislike and mistrust of Mr. Ramsey. It also unleashed remorse. She shouldn’t have allowed Nicholas and Olivia to come here, should have heeded her reservations instead of ignoring them.
This was all her fault. And now she needed to set things right.
Silently and without any further discussion, she lifted the end table away from Nicholas’s bed. Round like a stool, it was heavier than she’d anticipated. She managed to carry it several feet before having to place it down again. At the soft thud against the floor, she cringed and then held her breath, praying the ensuing silence and stillness in the house meant everyone else remained asleep.
She picked it up again, but before she could move, a voice cut through the darkness. “What do you think you’re doing in here?”
Sophie gasped and dropped the furniture with a resounding bang.
Mr. Ramsey stood in the bedroom doorway, holding a lantern in one hand and his rifle in the other. The low flicker of the flame cast a jaundiced glow over the man’s stark features and unsmiling, tightly drawn mouth.
He took a step into the room, grabbed Nicholas by the arm, and hauled the boy behind him. Nicholas cried out. The half sob, half whimper contained more fear than pain. Sophie knew Nicholas’s cries enough to distinguish what they meant and to realize he was terrified of Mr. Ramsey.
She lunged after her boy, fully intending to pick him up and run from the house if that was what it would take to get him away from Mr. Ramsey. But before she could reach Nicholas, the cold barrel of the gun blocked her.
“Get out of my house right now.” The man’s voice was as steely as the long length of the rifle.
Sophie wouldn’t let the man intimidate her. After all, she’d faced worse on the streets of New York City. “I’m not going without Nicholas and Olivia. Hand them both over. Then I’ll be on my way.”
He shoved Nicholas into the hallway and then spoke in an even tone over his shoulder to Mrs. Ramsey, who was hovering nearby and visibly trembling. “Take the boy into the bedroom and lock the door behind you.”
“No!” Sophie shouted and tried to slip underneath the gun. But Mr. Ramsey brought the butt end down against her shoulder with a force that tore a scream from her throat and drove her to her knees. Even as she fought against the burning pain, she scrambled back to her feet.
Nicholas was openly sobbing now, and Mrs. Ramsey was murmuring to him even as she hurried to obey her husband and drag the boy away. Above, Olivia in the attic had begun to pound against the trapdoor and call Sophie’s name.
“Olivia!” Sophie yelled in response. “Olivia! I’m here to get you!”
“Get out of my house before I drag you out!” Mr. Ramsey barked. The butt of the gun knocked against her again, this time in the middle of her back. It wasn’t as hard or painful as the first hit, but it sent Sophie down to her knees once more.
“I won’t leave without the children!”
“Oh, yes you will.” Mr. Ramsey grabbed hold of her arm and began to slide her toward the steps as if she weighed no more than one of the scarecrows in the garden behind the house.
With Olivia’s cries from overhead and Nicholas’s sobs from behind the closed bedroom door, Sophie’s resolve hardened, and she tried to grab on to something. Even as she fought against Mr. Ramsey, he picked her up, flung her over his shoulder, and started down the stairs.
“You’re unfit to have them!” She kicked and hit. In spite of her flailing and yelling, he didn’t stop until he reached the front door, opened it, and stepped onto the front porch. He dumped her so that she fell on her backside in the grass.
The impact jarred her as pain shot up her back. She wheezed for a moment and tried to draw in air as well as come up with a new plan. All she could think to do was fight back. She scrambled to her knees and pushed herself to her feet. Then she charged toward Mr. Ramsey.
He raised the barrel of his gun and aimed it at her.
“Sophie!”
At the shout of her name, Sophie halted. She spun to see a horse and wagon careening down the road in front of the Ramseys’.
“Sophie, wait!” the voice called again, this time more frantic. Reinhold’s voice. Moonlight outlined his sturdy shoulders hunched over the reins.
She wanted to weep with relief at the sight of him. “Reinhold!” she cried and ran toward him.
He leaped down before the wagon came to a complete stop and strode toward her. She flung herself at him, and he caught her easily up into his arms and against his chest, crushing her in a hug so fierce she almost couldn’t breathe.
For just an instant, she wanted to bask in the embrace and try to understand the meaning of his strong emotions. But too much was at risk, and they couldn’t spare a single second. Not when she needed his help to rescue Olivia and Nicholas.
She pulled back enough that she could see his face, then tried to explain what had happened and how Mr. Ramsey was forcing her to leave without Nicholas and Olivia. “I can’t go without them,” she said, squeezing Reinhold’s arms for emphasis. “Help me get them, Reinhold. Please.”
“She’s not taking those children.” Mr. Ramsey spoke quietly from where he still stood on the porch, his gun leveled on them. “The Children’s Aid Society gave them into our care, and we take our commitment seriously.”
“They don’t want to live with you anymore,” Sophie said.
“Of course they’re going to have a difficult time adjusting if their former caregiver insists on stopping by every few days.”
“They’re having a difficult time because you’re cruel!” Sophie broke away from Reinhold, intending to march up to Mr. Ramsey and spit in his face.
Before she could make it more than two steps, Reinhold stopped her with an iron grip on her arm. “Wait, Sophie.”
She was about to jerk away from him, but at the click of the rifle, Reinhold spun so that he stood between her and Mr. Ramsey. “Everyone needs to calm down,” he said, holding her firmly in place.
“If you don’t take her and get off my property, I’ll shoot,” Mr. Ramsey said, his tone low and hard.
“Give me my children!” Sophie shouted.
“They’re mine now, not yours.”
“They’ll never be yours! Once Reverend Poole hears how you’ve locked Olivia in the attic, he’ll take them away.”
“And once I ride into town tomorrow and tell the sheriff you broke into my house and tried to kidnap my children, he’ll take you away and send you right back to New York City to prison.”
Sophie hadn’t considered the implications of her actions, and she scrambled to come up with a response, something that could save both her and the children. But a strange cold hand of panic clamped around her throat and began to squeeze.
“You don’t need to go to the sheriff,” Reinhold interjected. “There’s been a misunderstanding here, that’s all.”
Sophie couldn’t speak past the panic’s tight hold. What if Mr. Ramsey followed through on his threat and went to the sheriff tomorrow? What if the lawman arrested her and decided to send her back to New York City and she ended up on Randall’s Island? What would become of Olivia and Nicholas then?
“She needs to sever her bond with the children. They’re ours now.”
“I’m sure everyone will agree that visits now and then will help the transition go more smoothly.” Although Reinhold’s words were calm, they also contained the hint of a threat.
Sophie sagged against his back and closed her eyes. On her own, she was nothing, an orphan girl without any rights or power. With just her word against Mr. Ramsey’s, he would win. But with Reinhold stepping in and standing up for her, she might still have a chance.
As if coming to the same conclusion, Mr. Ramsey said, “Take that girl away and don’t let me see her here again. Next time I won’t hesitate to call on the sheriff.”
Numbly, Sophie let Reinhold guide her to the wagon and assist her up onto the seat. She held herself straight with her chin high as they rode away. But with each grassy acre of distance that came between her and the children, her chest and throat tightened with agony.
She’d not only failed to rescue them, she’d failed to do anything to make their lives better. In fact, her visit would probably only multiply their suffering.
With the edge of town coming into view, Reinhold tugged the reins and brought the wagon to a stop. He shifted on the bench to look at her. “Did he hurt you?”
“No.” Sophie rolled her shoulder where he’d hit her with the gun. It would be bruised and sore, but the pain there couldn’t compare to what she felt inside.
The moon was high overhead, casting ample light upon her disheveled hair and clothing. And likely showing every trace of her despair. She stared straight ahead, not seeing anything but Nicholas’s face when Mrs. Ramsey had hauled him into her bedroom.
“Sophie.” Reinhold’s voice was tender and filled with such compassion that she couldn’t keep her tears at bay. Several slid out and trickled down her cheeks.