by Trina M. Lee
The memory of plunging it into Michelle surfaced, and I tasted bile at the back of my throat. “I used it to hurt someone, a human. I didn’t want to, but I didn’t have much choice.”
“That woman chose to serve Dash knowing that it put her life in jeopardy and, more importantly, her soul. We all have a role to play. She played hers, and you played yours.” Cinder rose and pulled me up with him. “You’re shivering. Get something to eat and get some rest.”
Maybe some food would settle my stomach. “What about them?” I jerked a thumb toward the living room. “Dash did a real number on them both. They need healing, and I don’t think they’re safe at their house once the sun goes down.”
Cinder considered the guys who appeared to be deep in conversation. Arrow had tossed his hat on the chair and his long hair fell to hide his face. His shoulders were squared and stiff. Rowen slumped against the back of the couch, his arms crossed and his brow pinched. I wondered what exactly they were talking about.
“I don’t suppose you want to have them stay here,” Cinder suggested, his head inclined in thought. “I can’t put wards on Arrow’s house since he’s dark. Rowen won’t be safe there any longer.”
I studied the brothers through the glass. Arrow was clearly in more pain than he wanted to show. It was more than just the drugs that had him losing his balance in the kitchen. Dash had seriously hurt him. He could be bleeding internally for all I knew. Rowen too was in rough shape, but he didn’t seem to be as obviously distressed. His agony appeared to be more of the mental kind.
“Will you heal him?” I asked. “Arrow. I mean.”
Cinder regarded me with a studious look that dissected my words, seeking out the root of my intent. “You would ask me to bless him? After all that you know him to be.”
I knew the angel wasn’t trying to make me second-guess my request. He merely wished to verify it. Feeling my stare upon him, Arrow glanced up to meet my gaze.
“Yes,” I said, hoping it wasn’t a mistake. “He’s as lost as anyone, Cinder. I think he even knows it. If I don’t make a request on his behalf, who will?”
With a broad smile, Cinder turned to go inside. “You never stop amazing me, Ember. I hope you can see the depths of your genuine nature. You may be a sinner, but your heart dwells in a place of beauty.” He stopped with a hand on the door and turned back to me. “You’re no stranger to commitment, you know. That little tortoise in there will live many human years, yet you promised to care for him through them all.”
I opened my mouth to protest then clamped it shut, finding that he was right. Adopting Seth hadn’t felt like a commitment. Not for a moment had I paused to consider the length of years he would live. In fact, the idea of having decades with the little guy had appealed to me.
“I see what you did there.” With a laugh, I gave him a playful shove. “Let’s go inside. It’s freezing out here.”
The guys fell silent as we entered. They exchanged a look. Fatigue lined Rowen’s eyes, giving them a hollow, sunken appearance. Arrow was wired on coke when he should have been tired as well. Exhaustion was quickly overtaking me.
Cinder extended a hand to Arrow. “May I?”
Arrow shot me a wary glance before putting his hand in Cinder’s. Nothing obvious or visible happened. The room seemed to grow warmer, and Arrow let out a small gasp. Then it was over. Cinder did the same with Rowen who watched him in wide-eyed wonder.
“Stay safe,” Cinder addressed us all. To me, he added, “We’ll speak soon.” Then he was gone.
“We all need to get some sleep,” My gaze landed on the Midnight Star, surprised that Cinder had left it behind. “We’re safe here behind Cinder’s wards. You guys can crash here if you want. The couch pulls out into a bed.”
Arrow got up too quickly and put a hand to his head. “You guys chill here. I’m heading home. Hiding from Dash is pointless. He’ll catch up with me eventually.”
“Arrow, don’t. Just stay. At least until you’ve slept.” The hard edge to Rowen’s tone made me think they’d argued while I was outside.
“Naw, it’s cool. I’ll sleep in my own bed. And maybe die there too.” Arrow shrugged like it was all part of life, no big deal. Then he headed for the door without a look back.
Rowen got up too, wearing a scowl. Instead of following Arrow, he went straight into my bedroom and closed the door. With raised brows I stared at the closed door. Did this mean we were an official item? He was sleeping in my bed as if we were.
The smothering sensation of commitment crawled over me, cutting off my breath. Were we supposed to have a talk about this or just let it be whatever it was? I was too confused and too tired to make sense of it all.
I caught up with Arrow when he was halfway down the hall. He kept going, ignoring me when I said his name. Breaking into a sprint, I caught up to him. I grabbed his arm tighter than necessary.
“Do you think going off alone is the best idea right now? I don’t think you’re in the right state of mind to be alone.”
He shook me off with a force that bordered on violent. “I don’t really give a shit what you think, Spike. Stop acting like we’re the same. Rowen is light, and you are so sickeningly light that you may as well just choose them and get it over with. I’m dark. The enemy. So thanks for asking your angel pal to heal me, but I’ll be on my way now.”
He stormed away with such anger in his stride that I decided it was best to let him go. Who was I to try to stop him? Arrow was in charge of his own destiny. Still, I felt bad for him. Perhaps my pity drove him away in such fury.
After stabbing the button for the elevator half a dozen times, he cast a scathing glare my way. “See you in a few days. When we kick your ass on stage.”
So he wanted to be like that, did he? Fine. I got it. Arrow didn’t know how to react to the kindness of others because he wasn’t used to receiving it. Lashing out was all he knew.
I watched him disappear into the elevator, feeling both sad for him and pissed at him. I hope you live to see that night, Arrow, I thought. Really, I do.
Chapter Twenty-One
Rowen stayed for a few days. It gave him a chance to rest, us a chance to recover, and Arrow some time alone. Rowen didn’t say much about his talk with Arrow, only that the discovery that they were brothers had been shocking. He needed some time to adjust.
In between work, jamming with the girls, and training with Cinder, we didn’t actually spend all that much time together. Still, at the end of the third day, when he announced that he was going home, I was both relieved and worried.
We hadn’t had `the talk,’ the awkward breakdown of our relationship that analyzed the future we might or might not have together. Every moment I spent with Rowen brought me closer to a feeling of certainty that he was the one. Still, the voice of doubt lingered in my head.
“If this is moving too fast for you, let me know,” he’d said to me one night after we’d made love. “I don’t want to scare you away. But I don’t think I could ever feel for someone else what I feel for you.”
I’d held him close and kissed his words away, content to let my body say the words I couldn’t give voice to. I did feel deeply for Rowen, but I didn’t do love so well. I feared hurting him.
Once he’d decided to go back to Arrow’s, I made him promise me he would be careful. That night, we’d sat outside Arrow’s house in my car, holding hands and dragging the moment out as long as we reasonably could.
“If anything happens, Dash or anyone else, don’t hesitate to call me. I’ll come.” I kissed him several times before letting him get out.
“I promise,” he’d sworn with his hand on the door. “You know, Spike, you are the one who made me so sure of where I belong. I want you to be that sure too. It’s ok to take a leap of faith. You might be surprised at how well it works out.”
I watched him walk up the front steps and disappear inside. Arrow’s car wasn’t out front, but it could have been in the garage. I had to admit that I’d love to have b
een a fly on the wall when they spoke next.
When I pulled up at the jam space to meet the girls, it felt like it had been ages since we’d been together when it had only been a few days. Once Jett was brought up to speed on the latest goings on in the nephilim world, she forgot that she was mad at me for some silly-ass reason.
“Next time shit like that happens, Spike, you let me know. I’ll have your back in a fucking heartbeat. I mean it.” Jett had been adamant, insisting she wasn’t afraid of Dash, adding, “Fear is for suckers.”
She was currently singing her heart out as we put the finishing touches on a new song. Playing it for the final show meant a lot to Jett. I’d never seen her so intent on proving herself. I wondered if she would’ve been this hell bent on winning if we’d been up against a band other than Molly’s Chamber.
Even though the final band battle meant a lot to me, it was difficult to stay focused. My mind kept straying. Rowen’s text that Arrow was gone didn’t help any. Arrow had left a message saying he’d try to make it to the show. No guarantees. What in the ever loving fuck?
We took a break after that song, and I told Jett about the text.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Jett stared at me with growing ire. “Arrow’s bailing on the show? We can’t win by default. I want to kick his ass!”
“He didn’t say he was bailing,” I corrected, accepting the joint Tash passed my way. “He said he’d try to make it.”
I mulled this over. Where the hell would Arrow go? And why? It definitely had something to do with Dash.
“Oh, he better fucking make it. I will gut that fucker if he ruins this final night for me. For us.” Jett snatched the joint away and puffed angrily on it. I hid a smile. She was always so easily angered. The wolf made her impatient and bossy, or maybe that was just Jett. I hadn’t known her before she was a wolf.
We played well into the wee morning hours. Finally Tash packed up her bass and announced that she was going home. I’d been yawning for some time already.
“Me too,” I agreed. “Jett, I think we’re more than ready for the show. Let’s call it a night.”
“Fine.” Her eyes glittered wolf. She was still cranky though her mood had worn thin. “When we win, I’m taking us all out to celebrate. Somewhere swanky where they frown on people like us.”
I wasn’t sure if she meant us as in rock musicians or us as in beings other than mere humans. It didn’t really matter.
We locked up the jam space and headed to our cars. I was in the middle of the parking lot when Koda appeared without warning. It was so sudden that I’d had no sense of him. He appeared right in front of me with black wings spread, his red eyes seeming to glow in the darkness. Jett waved for the other girls to take off quickly as she hurried to my side.
“What now, Koda?” I asked tiredly. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t show up like this in front of my friends.”
His gaze swept over me before lingering on Jett who glared furiously at him. With wings flared, Koda maintained an intimidating stance.
“I came to warn you about Dash,” he said. “He’s going to be at your show this weekend.”
“Am I supposed to be surprised? Or scared? Because all I am is sick of demon bullshit.” My palms tingled as I instinctively grew defensive. Throwing a fireball in Koda’s face might feel good, but the results would be short lived. Not worth it.
“You have been nothing but a bitch to me, and still I’m here with good intentions. Is it too much to ask that you speak to me with some respect?” Somehow Koda managed to look hurt.
I wasn’t buying it, and I snickered, unable to resist. “But I don’t respect you, Koda. And let’s not forget what they say about good intentions. The road to hell is paved with them.”
“Actually,” he retorted with a sinister smile. “The road to hell is paved with the souls of snotty nephilim who spit in the face of those seeking to help them.”
Jett scoffed. She wasn’t the type to let a stupid comment like that pass without a remark. “Is that how you think you get into a lady’s pants? No wonder you’ve never scored with Spike.”
My elbow jerked of its own accord, finding its way into the soft tissue between Jett’s ribs. She grunted, but it came out as more of a laugh.
Koda spared an evil smirk for Jett. “I bet that mouth of yours gets you into plenty of trouble.”
“You have no idea,” she quipped, thrusting her hip forward and crossing her arms. Jett wasn’t one to be easily cowed.
“I haven’t been looking for a new pet, but I would make an exception for you.” Koda’s cool tone had taken on a malicious note I’d heard before. Though he was seldom more than a royal pain in my ass, he was still dangerous. Taunting him was unwise.
I jumped in before Jett could reply and make things worse. “Tell me why I should care about Dash coming to the show. It’s a public place. What can he really do?”
Koda stared hard at Jett for several more seconds before allowing me to redirect his gaze. “That’s not the question you should be asking. You stabbed his witch and swiped his nephilim. You should be wondering what it is he won’t do.”
The intensity of his stare bore deeper into me than usual. I was uncomfortable beneath the weight of it. “Dash told you, didn’t he?”
“That you’re the keeper of the Midnight Star? Yes, he did. There have been many, though it’s been ages since it’s been a woman. But never an undecided.” The sound of feathers rustling was loud in the stillness as Koda’s wings settled against his back.
I couldn’t tell if there was a veiled threat in Koda’s words or not. The way he looked at me was as intrusive and vile as ever. I had a sinking feeling that this news had only fed his weird infatuation with me. “Ok,” I said, drawing out the word, feeling uncomfortable and desperately wanting to be away from him. “So if we’re done here, I’ll just be leaving now.”
“I came as your friend, Spike. I don’t want you to be caught off guard by Dash. I can help, you know. If you’d consider striking a deal.”
Jett scoffed but said nothing.
I looked at Koda like he was out of his mind, which he evidently was. What kind of a blasted fool did he take me for? My laugh was sharp and deadly. “Really? You’re trying that? Come on now, Koda. Even you’re smarter than that.”
He bristled, drawing himself up to his full height and twitching his wings. “I can keep Dash away from you,” he insisted defensively. “I can arrange it so he never dares to look your way again.”
I didn’t doubt that Koda could do as he claimed. No two demons were the same, each possessing their own powers and authority. However, Dash had proven himself as one who fights back, which made me think he wouldn’t give up as easily as Koda seemed to think.
“I don’t need your help,” I said.
At the same time Jett asked, “What would you want in return?”
Now that was a question I didn’t want the answer to. Too bad because I was going to get it.
“One night,” Koda said, his expression deadly serious. “I just want one night with you.” The fire that smoldered in his eyes conveyed his intent very well. I needed no further description. Talk about an indecent proposal.
“What the fuck, Koda?” I blurted. “Do you think I’m the kind of person who sells herself? You can take your deal and stick it. Get out of my face and leave me alone. Or you’ll be the next one I gut with the Midnight Star.”
It was a feisty threat, one I didn’t think through before anger forced it out of my mouth. Koda was getting on my last nerve. Allowing him to anger me was weakness. It brought me to his level. A few deep breaths helped me to regain control of my temper, but it didn’t stop a flame from sparking to life in my palm.
Koda’s eyes narrowed, but he otherwise didn’t react. The lack of reaction was worse than if he’d erupted in temper. I clamped my mouth shut and prayed he would leave.
“I see.” His tone was ice-cold steel. “Your constant rejection of my affection is growing tire
some. You’re terribly mistaken if you think you’ll have a happily ever after with your white lighter. The dark will never allow that one to slip away.”
The menacing glimmer in Koda’s eyes was starting to scare me. I touched Jett’s elbow lightly, hoping she would pick up on what I wasn’t saying. She hesitated a moment, unsure. Then she turned around and walked to her car. Good. I wanted her to go before Koda could get it into his head to hurt someone close to me.
“Rowen can handle himself,” I said, allowing the fire in my hand to grow. “So can I. Without your help.” Taking a risk, I shoved past him and continued on for my car. The flames engulfed me, coating me in a protective sheen of fire as I went.
Koda turned to watch me retreat, but he didn’t give pursuit. “I guess we’ll see about that.” His remark was simple enough, but it was loaded with threats and dark promises.
I kept an eye on Koda as I deposited my guitar into the backseat of the Nova. Jett’s Mustang tore away down the street, giving me a small sense of relief. I didn’t understand Koda’s obsession with me. Cinder had surmised that it had something to do with the rarity of nephilim women. He also suggested that Koda was drawn to the fact that I was both angel and human. The way Cinder described it made me think Koda had some kind of twisted fetish or something.
Koda could never be trusted, no matter what kind of nasty deal he was willing to strike. He was evil. Evil could never be trusted. It could only be battled.
As shitty a guy as Koda was, he had given me a heads up. It was no surprise that Dash wasn’t done with either Rowen or me. I’d expected him to come after us, but now I knew when that would be.
I wasn’t ready. Not by a long shot. Between the performance, Arrow’s disappearance, and the demons, the final battle showdown was shaping up to be a crazy good time or a total nightmare.
Chapter Twenty-Two
