by L. P. Maxa
Bryan looked over at her sister, then at me, wiping a tear from her eye. “I think, for the time being, that I should go back to South Carolina.”
“What?” The air left my lungs.
Bryan closed her eyes, another tear escaping. “I won’t be the reason you lose Landry. I won’t be the reason she has to go back with her mom. We aren’t married, and I’m not sure I’ll ever want that.”
“You can’t be serious?” I was starting to shake; I couldn’t stop it.
She shrugged like it was no big deal, like she hadn’t just ripped my heart out. “I wish I knew.” She took a deep breath, straightening in her chair. “But I don’t. I’m flighty; I can’t ever be sure.” She reached for my hand, and I jerked away from her.
“If you want to run, be my guest.” I got up and walked away.
Chapter Twenty-six
Bryan
When Jacks left the table, I let the tears fall. I didn’t want to run, I didn’t want to leave them, ever. I didn’t want to lose Landry any more than I wanted her to lose me. I loved her, I loved Jacks, I loved this little family we had formed over the past weeks. But I couldn’t risk it. I had to make sure Landry ended up where she belonged, which was with her dad. If I had to hurt Jacks to keep from hurting Landry, then so be it. Because that’s what parents are supposed to do for their kids, put them first. Protect them at all cost.
“Baby Dil? You okay?”
I looked up at Lexi’s concerned voice. “I have no idea.”
Lexi’s face hardened. “You want me to kick that old lady’s ass?”
I wiped a tear from my eye before it had time to fall. “No. She was right. We can’t just keep playing house without thinking of the consequences. She was just doing her job, looking out for Landry’s best interests.”
“You love them.” Luke reached across the table and tapped my arm.
I sent him a watery smile. “More than anything.”
He shook his head. “You don’t want to run. It never even crossed your mind before today.”
My voice cracked. “No. But I can’t be the reason he loses her. I love Landry, more than I love myself. So her happiness comes first. No matter what.”
Lexi reached for my hand with tears in her eyes. “Now that’s a mother.”
I went upstairs and for the first time in a long time, I got in my bed. I felt lonely and sad and I cried myself to sleep.
***
The next day I was sitting at Landry’s swim lesson, searching for puppies on my phone. I wanted to do something special for Landry and Jacks. And the two of them wanted a puppy so damn bad, it was adorable. I’d told them both over and over that they needed to wait until they moved to Texas. But now? After last night? I wanted to do this for them. I thought about it a lot and decided that I would stay until the trial. I’d move back into the guest room and I’d sit Diane down and tell her that I had a return ticket home and that Jacks would hire a new nanny in Texas. Landry would be sad that I wasn’t moving with them, but she’d be safe. And I’d promise her that I would visit.
I’d spent the past hour looking at all the different local shelters’ websites. When I clicked on the last page, I’d about given up hope of finding what I was looking for. And then I saw him. He was a two-month-old Great Dane/American Bulldog mix, solid white with a black patch over his eye. He was perfect.
When Landry got out of the pool, I rushed her through getting dressed. We usually went and got something to eat after class; she was always starving. But I drove us straight to the shelter instead. It took three pages of paperwork and one cuddle session in front of a shelter worker, and then he was ours.
We were stopped at a gas station on the way home; the puppy had peed in Jacks’s Tesla. “Landry, be sure to hold him tight, there are lots of cars around here.” She had him in her arms in the front seat while I did my best to soak up urine from the backseat. Maybe Jacks was right after all—getting him potty-trained before they moved was smart.
“Okay, Momma.”
I went stock-still, my eyes searching the parking lot. Was she here? Had she spotted us? I stood up, checking every car window I could see into. And then I realized something, she didn’t call Amelia Momma, she called her Mom. I dipped my head down to look at Landry. She was cuddling the puppy and giggling while he licked her face. She didn’t have a care in the world. She hadn’t seen her mom; she’d called me Momma. My eyes filled with tears. I took a few seconds to get my emotions under control and then I threw away the rags I was using. “Okay, sweet girl, climb in the back and get your seat belt on.” I waited for her to buckle up and then I passed her the wiggly puppy.
I couldn’t leave her. What the hell was I thinking? Me going away wasn’t our only option here. They wanted permanent? We’d give it to them.
Chapter Twenty-seven
Jacks
Last night had been fucking brutal. Bryan had destroyed me. What I couldn’t figure out was why, because I knew she hadn’t had one foot out the door. Right? Maybe she just wasn’t willing to fight for us. I hadn’t talked to her today. I was avoiding her, which was easy because I was in the studio and she was with Landry at swim. See? I knew she had swim class today.
“Earth to Jacks.” Luke snapped his fingers in front of my face.
“Sorry, what?”
He cocked his head. “How you doing, man?”
I shook my head. “I feel like my heart was ripped out of my fucking chest and the sun will never shine again.”
Luke’s eyebrows rose. “I wish there was something we could say, or do, to make it better.”
“There isn’t.” I didn’t want to talk about it, it hurt too much. The thought of Bryan leaving was literally gut wrenching.
“What are you going to do?”
I looked over to Smith. “What can I do? She’d rather run than fight. And I can’t even blame her. Between Landry and her mom…my life is chaos right now. She has every reason to want to go.” I just thought we meant more to her than that.
“Fight for both of you.” My head shot up at the sound of Dylan’s voice. I hadn’t even heard the door open.
“What?”
“You heard me, Jacks. Fight. Fight enough for the both of you.”
I stood. “Are you kidding me right now? You’ve been all but daring her to leave for the past month, and now that she actually is, you want to be supportive?”
“I realized something last night.” She closed her eyes, steeling herself. “I was wrong.”
She opened her eyes and I held her gaze. “She lied. Last night, she lied about why she was leaving. Didn’t she?”
“Go ask her yourself. Go fight.” She gestured to the floor above us.
I turned toward the stairs. I’d show these people a fucking fight. I wasn’t going to let her leave us, and she had another think coming if she thought I’d let her sacrifice herself for us. I entered the main floor to the sound of Landry laughing. It was her super happy laugh; it sounded like little bells. I followed the sound into the backyard where Landry, Bryan, and Dagger were running around with the cutest white puppy I’d ever seen. “B?”
Bryan looked up when I walked out onto the back porch, her smile wary. “Hey.”
I stared across the yard. “Whose puppy?”
“Landry’s.” She reached down and gave him a good tummy scratch when he rolled over at her feet. “I saw him on a shelter website and I couldn’t resist.”
I nodded. “A going-away present?”
“Something like that.”
Her answer cut deep. If we were going to have this out, it was going to happen right fucking now. “Hey, Buttercup? Uncle Luke is making lunch. Why don’t you go eat and then you can come back out and play.”
She looked from me to Bryan. “Are you mad about the puppy?”
I chuckled. “Of course not! He’s the cutest puppy I have ever seen. We need to pick a name later.” I waited for her to head into the house before turning back to Bryan. “I need you to be honest with m
e.” She nodded. “Do you want to leave? Are you bored with me? Not cut out for this life?” She shook her head. “Then what the fuck happened last night?”
“I love Landry more than I love myself. I love you more than I love myself.” Her voice trembled. “And me leaving would guarantee that the two people I love most in this world would always be together.”
I wanted to sink down to my knees and worship this woman. She was strong. She was stronger than anyone I’d ever met. Including me. Where I was ready to fight tooth and nail to keep them both, she was selfless enough to not make me. “My God, I love you.”
She bent down and picked up the tiny puppy, snuggling him to her chest. “She called me Momma today.”
“Landry did?”
She nodded. “Yeah. We were in the car and she said, ‘okay, Momma,’ like it was the most natural thing in the world. At first I thought she’d seen her mom, or it was just an accident. But…”
“She doesn’t call Amelia Momma.”
“No. She doesn’t.” A tear rolled down her cheek. Before I could move to wipe it, she held her hand up, stopping me. “I’m not leaving.”
“What?” I swallowed past the lump in my throat, afraid to believe what I thought I heard.
“I realized something today. Landry’s not just yours, she’s mine too. I’ve known her just as long as you have. She might not have my DNA, but she has my heart. And I’m not going to let them take her from us.”
“Say it again.”
“I’m. Not. Leav—”
I fused my mouth to hers. Nothing about this kiss was sweet or playful. It was hot and passionate and so full of relief and possession. I was showing her that she was mine. She knew why I’d stomped out here a few minutes ago. She knew I was prepared for the battle of my life. I pulled back, grinning. “So the puppy is a going-away present for all of us?”
She shrugged. “You were right. I want this baby boy potty-trained before the move.” She wrapped her arms around my waist and turned her face toward mine. “I don’t want him ruining my hand-scraped hardwood floors.”
The smile that took over my face was so big it was almost painful, “Your hand-scraped hardwood floors?” She nodded and I kissed her again. I wanted to keep kissing her, I wanted to throw her over my shoulder and carry her upstairs. She just adopted us the world’s most adorable puppy and told me she that not only was she not going anywhere but that she was moving to Texas with us. The infectious sound of Landry’s giggles was the only thing that could pull me away. She must have come outside at some point during all the kissing. I walked across the yard and kneeled down next to her. The puppy was on his back and she was rubbing his tummy. “Well, what do you want to name him?”
She looked at me, scooping him up in her arms. “I get to name him?”
I reached out and scratched behind his ear. “Of course. He’s yours.”
Bryan reached down and put her hand on my shoulder. Landry looked between the two of us. “He’s ours. Right, B? He’s for our family.”
“That’s right, sweet girl.” She sat on the ground, pulling both Landry and the wiggly puppy into her lap. “But your dad and I want you to name him.”
“Anything I want?”
Bryan said “yes” the same time I said “within reason.” Landry had been spending a lot of time in a house full of rock stars. There’s no telling what she’d picked up. She tapped her chin. “Crash.”
“Crash?”
She nodded. “Like the crash cymbal on the drums. His name is Crash Florida Cole.”
***
“Nothing turns me on more than seeing you laying on our bed wearing my shirt.” I shut our door and laid my body on top of Bryan’s. “Now, take it off.”
Since we were going to be living together, permanently, I would get to do this every fucking night. Life with B would be…ecstasy. Huh, maybe I could turn that into a song lyric. This chick made me horny; she always had. But ever since she told me she loved me earlier today…? I was a whole new level of turned the hell on.
She grinned, wriggled free and slowly peeled the fabric from her body, giving me a small show in the process. “Your turn.”
I quickly tossed my own clothes away and then threw the blue plaid comforter over both of our naked bodies. I rolled on my side and pulled B’s back against my chest. My dick against her bare ass. “Say it again.”
She pushed against me. “I’m not leaving.”
“Because you’re mine.” I let my fingers trail lazily up her naked thigh and around the front of her hip. “Say it.” I used my palm against her pelvis to tug her closer to me. I placed small kisses on her shoulder.
“I’m yours, Jacks. Only. Ever. Yours.”
I moved my hand to her knee, draping her leg over mine, opening her up for me. I positioned the head of my dick at her core, coating myself in her desire. “You ready, doll?” I sucked lightly on her neck, leaving little red marks.
“Always.”
I filled her in one smooth motion. “You feel so good like this, baby.” I kept one hand on her leg, holding her in place. The other I wrapped around to rest at the base of her throat. “I’ll never get enough.” I pumped in and out, keeping a steady rhythm, over and over until we were both dripping with sweat.
“Oh, god, don’t stop.”
I loved feeling all of her body pressed against me, I loved the smell of her hair in my face, I loved the sound of her nearing release. Everything about being inside Bryan was so fucking perfect. Nothing and no one would ever compare. I put my mouth against her ear, my whispers making her cry out even louder.
“Let go for me, doll.” I added a little bit of pressure to her throat and quickened my pace.
“Yes, Jacks, just like that.”
I dropped my forehead to her back and went even faster, harder, giving her everything I had. When she came, I had to cover her mouth with my hand to quiet her moans. Which in turn made me follow her over the edge.
Landry
I loved my new puppy. I’d wanted one my whole life, and now I had the cutest one ever made. I didn’t want Dagger to be jealous though so I made sure to let him get on the couch with us to watch cartoons. Jacks and B were still asleep when I woke up, but Crash was awake and wagging his tail. So I scooped him up and we came downstairs and got some yogurt (the good kind that Lexi hides in the back of the fridge) and I took him outside to potty. Now he, Dagger, and I were watching cartoons. I was going to be sad when Dagger lived in a different house than me; I bet Crash would be sad too. He liked to climb all over him and bite his ears.
There was a knock at the front door. I didn’t know what to do. I was pretty sure Jacks and B wouldn’t want me to open the door by myself. I looked over at Dagger. I wasn’t really alone; Lexi said that Dagger was a good guard dog. That’s why I was allowed to play in the backyard by myself. I stood and took him by the collar toward the front door. The person knocked again. Maybe it was Ms. Diane. It was time for another check. I’d left Crash on the couch and I could hear him whining because he couldn’t get down on his own. They knocked again. Man, they must really need something. As soon as I reached out to put my hand on the doorknob, Dagger started to growl deep in his throat. The sound vibrated through my body.
Chapter Twenty-eight
Bryan
“Did you hear that?”
“Hmmm? What?”
I sat up. “I think someone is knocking on the door.”
Jacks opened his eyes, looking toward the hall. “Why would they knock on our door? It’s open.”
I threw my legs over the side of the bed. “Not our door, the front door.” I stuck my head in Landry’s room. “She’s already up. And Crash is gone. Hope she took him to the backyard to pee.” Maybe that was her knocking, maybe she went out front and got locked out. Jacks must have thought the same thing because he was now suddenly awake and following me downstairs.
We reached the entryway to see Landry and Dagger standing in front of the closed front door. Dagger was grow
ling and Landry was petting him, trying to calm him down. “Hey, sweet girl, was that someone knocking?”
She turned when she saw us. “Yes. I didn’t know if I was allowed to open it, so I brought Dagger with me to be safe…but then he started growling.”
Jacks and I looked at each other; we both knew who it was. We were too happy. Landry had calmed down and stopped looking over her shoulder. Of course Amelia would show back up. Jacks kneeled down in front of her. “That’s probably your mom.”
Landry’s lip started to quiver. When she looked at me, I got down next to her too. “If you don’t want to see her, then I can take you upstairs. It’s up to you.” I could feel Jacks looking at me like I’d lost my mind. He thought we needed to fight harder. But I’d realized we needed to fight smarter.
She put her hand in mine, straightening her spine. In that moment I saw what Jacks saw; she did look a lot like me. “I’m okay. I want to stay.”
I nodded and opened the door. This was the first time I’d really gotten a good look at her. You could tell that at one point she’d been very pretty. But time had not been good to her. She smiled a little when she saw Landry.
“Hi, baby.”
Landry scooted closer to me. “Hi.”
Jacks stood on the other side of her, his hand on her shoulder. “What are you doing here, Amelia? I told you that the next time I’d have no choice but to call the police.”
She nodded, not taking her eyes off Landry. “I know. I just needed to see her, make sure that she was okay. Are you okay, baby? Are you… Are they…”
Amelia was at a loss for words. Once I started letting myself think of Landry as my daughter, once she called me Momma…I’d seen things from Amelia’s perspective. She wasn’t a good parent. Landry spent more than most of her life in the back of that woman’s mind. But she was still a mom. She still had fears; she still worried; she still needed to know that Landry was okay. That was why she’d come back. That was the only reason. “It’s okay, sweet girl. We’re right here. You can talk to your mom.”
