Love for the Holidays (five book Christmas bundle)

by Noelle Adams

  She hadn’t explicitly asked about his intentions, and he was grateful for that. If she had, he probably wouldn’t have been able to make that oath with the same conviction. He was pretty sure that he and Laney were on the same page. His stomach clenched at the caveat. Pretty sure wasn’t good enough. But for fuck’s sake, neither was nine days. He was doing the best he could under the circumstances.

  Down the hall, Ty’s office door opened and a stacked blond stumbled out, adjusting her skirt. His friend followed, giving her one last kiss and a pat on the ass. Kyle cleared his throat.

  “Hey, man. What brings you here? I thought you were my brother.” Ty looked far too pleased with himself as he sauntered into Evan’s office and fell into one of the leather chairs under the window.

  “Came to see if you needed any help.”

  Ty waggled his eyebrows.

  “With the party, dickhead. For tomorrow.”

  “Ah, the party. Right. Nope, everything’s coming together nicely. It’s great to have an events manager now to handle stuff like that.” He cracked his knuckles. “To be honest, I wasn’t sure you were coming.”

  Kyle frowned. “Why the hell wouldn’t I—goddamn small town—who told you?”

  Ty chuckled, then laughed harder again as Kyle’s tension grew. “Karen, Ian, Carrie, Evie…take your pick. In the age of smart phones, wildfires have nothing on gossip.”

  “Fuck me. This isn’t anyone’s business!” He leapt to his feet, bristling with…something. His muscles were bunching and twitching under skin that felt too hot and too tight. He punched one fist into the other palm. They needed time, which they didn’t have, and space, which clearly no one was going to give them.

  “Settle, dude. Seriously, what’s gotten into you? I’ve never seen you so wound up over pussy.”

  Before either of them could process what was happening, Kyle had Ty hauled out of his chair and up against the wall. Kyle’s forearm pressed hard into the other man’s chest, and Ty opened his mouth but Kyle cut him off.

  “She’s not…fuck. Don’t fucking say that.” He eased off. “She went back to Chicago for work.”

  Ty stared at him like he was an idiot. “So why are you here?”

  Maybe he was an idiot, because he didn’t understand the question. “To help with the party prep?”

  “Not here, numbnuts. Here.” He gestured out the window. “In Wardham. Why aren’t you in Chicago for the weekend? You don’t need to be back at work until what…Tuesday?”

  Yeah, he was an idiot of the highest order. He’d thought of visiting her, of course, but in the future. Another stolen week or weekend. Another fling. It hadn’t occurred to him to go with her. To be with her. It was only a five hour drive. Why was he thinking about March? He could be in her bed every weekend if she’d have him. That’s a big if. Dread flooded his guts. Laney had made it clear that she didn’t believe he could want her, just her. What if he couldn’t break down that wall? Maybe that’s why she didn’t extend an invitation. Last time she did that, you broke her heart.

  So what was different now? If anything, he was more entrenched in Wardham than ever before. Laney was right to worry. Every choice he’d ever made had been in favour of his hometown. His friends. His family.

  Family. Fuck. The family he wanted had walked out his door in the middle of the night and he just stood and watched. Again.

  “Kyle? You done going all alpha male here?” Ty slid along the wall and eased his way back to the chair.

  “Not even close. I need a favour.”

  When Laney woke up hours later, her inbox had a photo of Kyle’s hand, gripping the steering wheel so hard his knuckles were white. She giggled, and snapped a quick photo of her bare legs stretched out on the bed. Then another one, this time a close-up of her face.

  She hadn’t even made it over to her desk before the phone rang.

  “Are you trying to kill me?”

  “You don’t like my pictures?”

  “I fucking love your pictures. I just got a hard-on in front of my parents.”

  Happy laughter bubbled up inside her. “I’m sorry. I mean, not really, but awwwww. I’d have liked to see that.”

  He growled in her ear. “You want to see it?”

  “You wouldn’t!” Laney sucked in a breath. “What if you accidentally sent it to your mom? Or your principal?”

  “I wasn’t talking about a picture, woman.”

  “Oh. That’s a shame, I really would like to see it.” That earned her another growl, then her phone chimed with an incoming text message. “How did you do that while we were talking?”

  “It’s the twenty-first century, sweetheart.”

  She pulled the phone away from her ear. Kyle’s glowering face stared at her, bare need radiating off his digital image.

  “You look…hungry. Like a wolf.”

  “Are you my Little Red Riding Hood?”

  She sucked in another breath, and he chuckled. “I think you just might be. Listen, I need to get back inside, but…”

  “It’s okay. I’ll talk to you later.”

  Kyle returned to the kitchen table and avoided his brother’s questioning look as he reached for the mashed potatoes.

  “What are you kids doing tomorrow night?” Kyle’s parents were going to babysit his niece and nephew so Ian and Carrie could ring in the New Year in style.

  “We’re going to the winery,” Carrie said. “Kyle, do you want drive together? We can share a cab home, then it’s just one car to go back and fetch in the morning.”

  He shifted in his seat. He’d anticipated explaining his absence to Ty, but not his family. He stared at his sister-in-law, willing her to not ask any questions. “Actually, I have other plans.”

  “Do they involve a smokin’ hot doctor?” It would be Ian that would cause problems, of course. Carrie pursed her lips together, holding in a laugh, as her husband turned to explain to his parents. “Kyle’s wrapped around the Laney axle again.”

  Kyle surged to his feet, his cutlery clattering against his plate as his chair skidded out behind him. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, so shut up.”

  “Kyle! Little ears, first of all.” His father didn’t need to raise his voice to make it clear he was displeased. “And second of all, sit your ass down in the chair and don’t be disrespecting your mother.”

  Six year old Kaylie giggled, and shrugged when Carrie gave her the stink eye. “What? Papa said ass. And Uncle Kyle said—”

  “We all know what he said. Eat your dinner.” Kyle’s mother looked down the table. “Kyle, do you want to share something?”

  He shrugged. “Not yet.”

  “Are you going to get hurt over this?” Eleanor Nixon never pulled her punches.

  “Maybe. The odds are pretty even, I guess.”

  “Do you love her?”

  Kyle lifted his head and looked his mother in the eye. “I think the first person that should hear those words is Laney, don’t you?”

  Across the table, Carrie pressed her hand to her chest and smiled. She shared a private look with her motherin-law, then changed the subject.

  Sixteen

  It had been three days since she’d left Wardham. Probably time to call her mom.

  She’d woken Claire and Evie to say goodbye and explain her sudden departure, and left a sticker covered note for Connor and Max. Evie had sent a photo of them making a doctor snowman later that day, but Laney still hadn’t talked to anyone at the farm. Her mom knew the drill, and they didn’t usually talk more than once a week, but…it wasn’t just about being a good daughter, either. Laney hoped that talking to her mom might help her figure out what to do about her mess of unsettled feelings. Yes, it was time to call her mom. Time to call Kyle as well. She winced. They hadn’t texted or spoken again since last night. He was putting the ball in her court, and she was watching it dribble along the ground.

  She tucked that pang of regret away for the moment. She only had a couple of minutes before her hair
appointment. Only enough time for a mom, not enough time for a guy.

  Claire picked up on the first ring. They exchanged brief updates on the last few days, then Laney dove in. “Kyle sent me a package. He told me he asked you for my address.”

  “That arrived quickly.”

  “I don’t think he made it himself. It was a gift basket type of thing.”

  “I hope I did the right thing.” Claire’s voice ached with worry, and Laney quickly reassured her it was fine.

  “We’ve been texting a bit. I didn’t expect him to be so…” A querying silence fell over her, and her mother didn’t try to fill in the gaps. “I don’t know. Understanding. Supportive. Constant.”

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  “I don’t know how long it will last.” Damn, that hurt to admit. “I can’t move home, Mom.”

  “It’s too soon to worry about that.” Claire sighed. “I hate to suggest that you just have a fling, but you’re a grown up. Just because Kyle lives here doesn’t mean he can’t make the drive to Chicago. And I’d love it if you visited more, even if your primary reason was a booty call.”

  Laney laughed. “Oh god, Mom!”

  “What? I understand how the world works these days.”

  The receptionist chose that moment to call her name, and Laney quickly told her mother that she loved her.

  As she sat in the salon chair, she closed her eyes and mused. He’d called her twice. All morning she’d thought about calling him, taking the initiative and demonstrating that she was in, committed to whatever this was between them. Sending the photos had been easy. Flirting was easy. Actually making a call was something much more dangerous. An acknowledgement that she cared about him beyond hooking up. With their history, caring was a slippery slope. What could love between them look like? Two homes, five hundred kilometers apart. Two weekends a month, coordinating vacation time, big phone bills and long empty nights.

  Not being with him at all, though…the idea of saying goodbye, of pushing Kyle away, caused hot tears to well up behind her eyelids. Blinking furiously, she redirected her attention to the magazine in her lap. The salon wasn’t the place to think about breaking up with someone. The other options weren’t really options at all. She couldn’t move home. And she couldn’t ask Kyle to leave Wardham. He’d made it clear that was his happy place, where he’d invested years of teaching service. Where he’d literally started to build his own home. His friends, his family. And it’s not like she’d be offering him much. An hour before bed. Half of her weekends.

  Isn’t that his call, though? Kyle didn’t need her protection. He’d drawn that boundary before, he would again if it got to be too much. Stabby pains danced through her gut at that realization. This wasn’t completely her decision. He seemed all in, but for how long?

  Someone tapped her on the shoulder and guided her over to the wash station. As the highlight foils slipped out of her hair, she bristled at herself. Would she really let it fall apart again?

  Laney pulled out her phone as she left the salon and dialed his number. Fear be damned. He answered on the first ring, his voice eager but breathless.

  “Did I catch you at a bad time?” She stepped into the street and hailed a cab. “I’m just heading home, I could call you back when I get there.”

  “No, it’s fine, I was just unloading the truck. I’m glad you called. Are you all ready for tonight?”

  “Pretty much. My hair and makeup are done, my introduction notes are written, I’ve memorized all the key points about donors.”

  “Do you have your dancing shoes picked out?”

  “I don’t think I’m going to do much dancing tonight.” She flushed as vivid memories of the last dance they shared crashed into her head.

  “You love to dance.” Kyle lowered his voice. “You should let some fat cats twirl you around the dance floor and make you feel beautiful.”

  “You wouldn’t be jealous?”

  He laughed. “Are you kidding me? But at the end of the night, you’d call me. They get you for a moment. You’re mine for…”

  “For what?” Laney whispered. It was time for the hesitation to end. “I’m yours. Right? I’m yours for…”

  Kyle cleared his throat. “Are you almost home?”

  She nodded, then remembered he couldn’t see her. “Yeah. One more block.”

  He didn’t say anything, and into the silence she spilled all sorts of possible meaning. She took a deep breath and pressed her hand against her stomach. “Kyle…”

  “Shhh, it’s okay.”

  “What is that, your new catch phrase? Hang on, I just need to pay the cab.” She reached into her purse and grabbed a twenty. She didn’t bother to wait for change. It was New Year’s Eve, after all. And she had a phone conversation to get back to.

  She exchanged nods with the doorman as she walked toward the building. “Please, Kyle. This is really hard for me. I don’t know why I’m so scared, I just am.”

  “You don’t need to be scared, beautiful. Look up.” She heard the words through the phone and in front of her at the same time. Kyle was standing in her lobby, looking nervous and handsome and oh so very real. He wore a black suit jacket over jeans and a dress shirt, and he was clean shaven. She squeaked as her phone tumbled to the ground and she flung herself into his arms, driving him back a few steps. “You’re mine forever, sweetheart. Forever.”

  Kyle eased her back to the ground and cupped her face in his hands. “I love you so much, Laney Calhoun. I love you here, in Chicago. I love you at the end of a 24 hour shift. I love you in this giant glass building that doesn’t seem to have parking for pickup trucks, and I love you even though you don’t think you have time or space in your life for a relationship.”

  “I was wrong.” She hiccupped. “I’ll make time.”

  He kissed her, pressing his lips against hers with sweet determination, promising her that it didn’t matter because he loved her just the way she was. Her knees buckled, and he eased her against him, his arms sliding solidly around her body. “Can we go upstairs?”

  She nodded, and he pulled her tight into his side, freeing his other hand to grab a suitcase that he’d left against the wall. In the elevator, they stood pressed against each other, hearts pounding in anticipation. A tremor wracked Laney’s body when they reached her floor. She pressed her key into Kyle’s hand and pointed to her door. If she didn’t sit down soon, she was going to pass out, and she really didn’t want to miss what she was hoping would come next.

  Kyle let his suitcase tumble to the ground as the door swung shut behind them. His attention was fixed solely on her, his gaze stripping her naked, not just her clothes, but grabbing her fears, questions and hesitations, flinging them aside as well. She pressed herself against him, still not quite believing that he was there in front of her.

  “How attached are you to that pretty hair do?” Kyle murmured against her neck as his fingers made quick work of her buttons.

  “Couldn’t care less,” Laney breathed, shoving his jacket down his arms. “You look nice, by the way.”

  “I shaved.”

  “I noticed.”

  “I love you.” Kyle wrenched open her jeans and she wiggled out of them while she worked on his belt buckle and fly.

  “Yeah? Because I love you.” Her breath hitched as he gripped her hips, his fingers curling under her ass, and then she was jerked up against his chest and he was pressing her against the wall. Her bare legs wrapped around his waist and she rocked her core against his erection.

  “Jesus, hang on a second.” He fumbled between them, and she realized he was still wearing his jeans. And he was shaking. That made two of them.

  “Wait, wait, wait. Let’s go into the bedroom.” She slid down the wall, her toes reaching for the floor. His hands raked up her sides, like he was searching for a solid handhold.

  Any part of me. I won’t let you go.

  His breath was loud and rough. His hands reached her shoulders, squeezed, then slamm
ed onto the wall on either side of her. Pressing their foreheads together, he took a deep breath and nodded. She captured his lips with hers. “I love you, Kyle. I have no idea how we’re going to work this out, but my heart? It’s yours.” She tugged on his arms, pulling his hands to her body. “My body is yours.” She worked on the buttons of her shirt. “Here, touch me.”

  He helped her lose the shirt, then divested himself of his clothes as well. Standing in the hallway, her in her bra and panties, him in his boxer briefs, they stared at each other. Both breathing hard. Brave and scared at the same time. Kyle skimmed his hands over her shoulders, down her arms, tracing her shape. She shivered, and he picked her up again, holding her high on his waist. She looked down at him with a tremulous smile.

  “No more doubt,” she whispered. “No more fear.”

  “Which way to our bed?”

  “Turn right. Second door.”

  He strode down the hall, effortlessly holding her against him, one palm on her ass, the other between her shoulder blades. Shouldering the door open, he found what he was looking for and lowered her gently. “Next time I’m going to fuck you up against the wall. When I’m not such an emotional pansy.” He slid her bra straps down her arms, freeing her nipples. “God, I love these.” He lowered his mouth, and his next words were muffled.

  “Say it again.”

  He let her breast pop out of his mouth and moved up, covering her completely with his weight. “I love you. You are my everything.”

  Laney whimpered. “There’s so much to talk about still.”

  “Nothing else matters but waking up next to you and being able to rub your feet when you’re tired.” He nipped at her lower lip, then sank his mouth into hers for a deeper kiss. Good lord, the man could kiss. She made another helpless noise, and he pulled away. “I’m here. I’m going to have to come and go, but I’m here.”

  Before she could question all the logistics of what that meant, he flipped over and pulled her on top of him. She lost the bra, and he cupped her mounds together as she started to slowly rock herself toward a first climax. Two layers of fabric separated them, but Kyle wasn’t sure she wouldn’t drag him with her. He dragged the scrap of silk down her hips, and she stood up to remove them all the way. He shucked his own boxers, and then she sank down, bringing them together.